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I think WookieCookie needs to get a lot of amazing credit here for what he states in this recent post that was updated on Surrender@20 from the League of Legends Forums.
A perfect way to put it into perspective and KUDOS to the guy who's coming out to admit he's a toxic player and wanting to change!
LINK TO ARTICLE
Click read for the article
Advice for a Toxic Player
Posted on Friday, July 25, 2014 at 6:41 PM by Moobeat
In a thread where a self-admitted toxic player asked for a rioter's advice to become a better player, WoookieeCookie stepped up to the plate to offer his advice to enjoying the game, decreasing stress, and being humble to your follow player.
"Penguinbashr,
You're already a step ahead by asking for help. But the trick here will be how you follow through.
If you're genuinely interested in improving then you need to take a step back and really reflect on why you play League of Legends or any other competitive online game for that matter.
Seriously ask yourself: "Am I even having fun?" Be honest.
To me, it sounds like you're not right now. Even though you admit to it, I bet you don't enjoy calling people "autstic ****s" in game. That sounds incredibly taxing and draining to get so worked up in every game you play.
Chances are, if you're not having fun now; you were at some point. You have A LOT of games played since you started in November 2010. You've been through the irelia nerfs, the UI changes, the server instability, the OP Win Xiao release, S1, S2, and S3 championships and a great many more.
If you're not having fun then reflect to figure out why. Why did you come to League in the first place? Do you have a favorite champion? You love competition? The strats and plays? Maybe an LCS Player or Streamer you look up to and want to mimic?
From what you told me, it sounds like you enjoy winning. And you HATE losing. That's pretty cool. Who doesn't hate losing? If you're going to approach League from that angle, then you need to have reasonable expectations. You need to be honest with yourself.
First thing to keep in mind: You win some. You lose some.
That needs to be your new motto.
This is true for every player in League of Legends. It doesn't matter if they're Bronze, or Challenger. If you're getting upset at a loss, you really have to think to yourself: "Why u mad?" Of course you're going to have losses. At any given time of the day, 50% of the players in League are winning games, and 50% of the players are losing.
Another thing to keep in mind: Sometimes a loss is going to be outside of your control. Think about it right now. Dwell on it. Get it out of your system; because it's going to happen and there is nothing you can do about it.
Sometimes you or someone on your team will be faced with a technical problem. Sometimes someone on your team is going to have a behavior problem. Sometimes someone on your team is just going to perform poorly.
League is a team game, it's not about you. It's about all of the players (including you) working together to make magic happen. Sometimes you're going to get a team and composition that gels really well with each other, sometimes you're not. Sometimes you are going to be able to carry your team, sometimes you are not. Sometimes you are going to get carried, sometimes you are not.
You win some, you lose some.
You can't control your teammates. You're not telepathically linked, you're not all fans of the same playstyles or strats. This is random solo queue. You are being paired with strangers.
Solo Queue isn't about controlling others it is about working with others.
The only one you get to control is yourself. Understand and accept that.
But! and this is key! Give your team mates some credit dude, they're not that different from you. We're all in this together, and we ALSO want to win. We love League of Legends just like you do. We love it so much we're playing Ranked Solo Queue and being competitive; just like you!
It might not seem like it all the time. We may not choose the same builds as you(or do you not choose the same builds as us?). We might not always perform well(but then again, you don't either). We might be a bit testy or angry in champion select (maybe we just had a string of losses like you and are agitated? Maybe we are expecting you to troll just as much as you are expecting us to troll?)
But in the end, we're all players; we're all fans of the game. And if you're going to play League of Legends you have to understand this, and you have to give other players the respect they deserve as human beings.
So what do we have so far?
-You play to win and get better.
-But you know that you will win some and you will lose some.
-You also know that you can't control everyone on your team.
-But you also know that your teammates are not that different from you. They love League, and they want to win, just like you.
If you really think about it like this and then you reflect on your last month or so of games there is only one conclusion. The biggest obstacle in your League of Legends ranked matches is yourself. You're not giving the benefit of the doubt to your team mates. You're not understanding that everyone is flawed. You're not acknowledging that people are inherently good and want to do good.
You can try to "stop committing toxic behavior", but if you're not going to get at the core philosophical reasons that fuel that toxic behavior you will never succeed.
Are you interested in what people say about you?
Here's a breakdown of a recent game you played. The person on your team who reported you said:
Negative Attitude - "Wins the game but still cries abotu someone else's build.":
What did you do?
(23 seconds in and you've already stalked everyone else in your game. You noticed that the Yi didn't have the same kind of runes you would have chosen)
Penguinbashr (0:23): yep, another game ruined by someone who can't be bothered to have a decent rune page
(Yi asks)
Yi: who has a bad page?
(You respond)
Penguinbashr (0:50): you do? no defensive runes? are you that dumb?
((Where's the benefit of the doubt? Is he dumb or is he just trying a different strategy? Maybe he picked the wrong rune page? It happens, even to pros. Besides that, why are you so focused on what he's doing? You've already gone out of your way to assume the worst in another player and then let everyone else on your team know too. Now you're mad. He's sad, and your team is holding their breathe)
Yi: aww man
Penguinbashr (1:34): shhh to you to. Now I have to go ****ing tank riven because yet again my game is ruined by someone who cant pick for the team
((You're being a bit dramatic. It's 1:34 into the game, and it's already ruined? How are you even going to win if you're willing to give up before the minions have reached their lanes? What are your team mates suppose to think when you're already claiming the game is ruined? What sort of image are you trying to give off? Do you want them to be better? Do you want Yi to go back in time and change his runes? At this point, such a comment is completely unnecessary. Something better would be "Alrighty! We'll give it a shot!" or "That's okay, we'll make do!"))
(4 minutes later, it looks like perhaps Yi has died)
Penguinbashr(5:36): oh well, gg. why do you like to ruin games?
((Where's the benefit of the doubt? Do you really think Yi likes to ruin games? Do you think he doesn't care to win? Why are you calling GG at 5 minutes in? Why play a game if you think you can lose in the first few minutes of a match. That sounds like a terrible game to play))
((20 minutes go by, you're relatively quiet. I believe it's because you have chat restrictions. Regardless, it's pretty clear your team is starting to come out on top. Still though, your attention has now gone to the Janna Support))
Penguinbashr(26:43): why would you go athenes over crucible
Janna(26:59): Don't need Crucible atm
Janna(27:06): Nothing to really use it on
Janna(27:12): Unless Trist gets hit by a bubble,
(((Not even acknowledging Janna, you continue to blast her, remember; you're team is up!))
Penguinbashr(27:22): why dont you have a sightstone either. this is support 101. sightstone, crucible, boots, gp item.
Janna(27:28): Don't need Sightstone
Janna(27:34): We're winning heavily
Penguinbashr (27:39): christ. i support and get fed up with adc's. i dont support and i get fed up with people doing **** builds.
((Is it a **** build when your team is winning?))
Janna(27:40): They aren't going to be warding that effectively.
Janna(27:53): I'm a 2 time diamond support, play your own Champ.
Penguinbashr (28:20): if you say so. that's why you're too dumb to get a sightstone right. or a decent trinket item.
((Again, where's the benefit of the doubt? Janna has over 2,675 games played since she started in April 2011. Her win rate for the last 20 games played is 65%. She wants to win, just like you do; you're not all that different))
((A minute later Janna seems to still be the focus of your thoughts. You continue to give her unneeded advice because you're not willing to give her the benefit of the doubt))
Penguinbashr(29:11): stacking athenes and crucible. wow. so good.
Penguinbashr (29:42): did you know items with the same unique effect dont stack?
Janna(29:53): Did you know toxicity gets you banned?
Janna(30:01): I don't need the mana.
Janna(30:10): I use Athene's for mana
Janna(30:16): and Cruc for the cleanse.
Janna(30:29): Why are you bming me
((Really though, ask yourself, why are you bming anyone? Your team is winning the match. Everyone is getting a long with each other, except for you, because you're unwilling to trust anyone else in the game. You're not having fun because you're too busy being paranoid about everyone else's intentions in game to sit back and enjoy the ride. You're so focused on how you think everyone else is playing poorly, that you're not even taking into account what you may be doing poorly yourself.))
And that's really a shame. Because you don't control other players, you can't improve other players; trying to do so is a battle you can't win. They are not NPC AI's at your control, they are independent thinking human beings with their own opinions, wishes, and desires. (Although they all want to win, just like you!)
This is only one chat log, but it's representative of many that I reviewed. I can't really give a full in depth analysis of each game; but I wanted to address some of the core issues you're having trouble with.
Please don't think I'm saying you're a bad guy. You're very likely a pretty chill dude in real life. You're certainly not alone with this kind of attitude. There is a strong minority segment of players that act similar to you. They want to win and they're willing to tear down anyone who gets in their way to do so. This post is as much for them, as it is for you because that attitude isn't going to get them anywhere.
I really hope you take the time to reflect on the issue. If you're realistic about yourself and others I think you'll make a lot of progress. I genuinely believe that currently your poor behavior and attitude is handicapping your overall true level of skill."