"There are billions of galaxies in the observable universe and each of them contains hundres and billions of stars. In one of these galaxies orbiting one of these stars lies a little blue planet and this planet is run by a bunch of monkeys and these monkeys don't think of themselves as monkeys. They don't even think of themselves as animals in fact they love to list all the things that they think seperate them from the animals supposedly thumbs & self awarness they use words like homo erectus and Australopithecus. You say tomato I say Tomato they are animals all right. They are monkeys, monkeys with high speed digital fibre optic technology but monkeys nevertheless. I mean they are clever you got to give them that. The pyramids, skycrapers, phantom jets, the great wall of china. That's all pretty impressive for a bunch of monkeys. Monkeys who's brain has evolved to such an unimaginable size that it's pretty much impossible for them to stay happy any length of time. In fact they are the only animals who think they are supposed to be happy. All of the other animals can just be but it's not that simple for the monkeys. you see the monkeys are cursed with consciousness and so the monkeys are afraid, so the monkeys worry. The monkeys worry about everything but mostly what all the other monkeys think because the monkeys desperately want to fit in with the other monkeys which is pretty hard to do. Because alof of the monkeys hate each other, this is really what seperates them from other animals. These monkeys hate, they hate monkeys that are different, monkeys from different places, monkeys from a different colour. you see the monkeys feel alone, all 6 billion of them some of the monkeys pay another monkey to listen to their problems. The monkeys want answers, the monkeys know they are going to die so the monkeys make up gods and then they worship them. Then the monkeys start to argue about who's made up god is better then the monkeys get really pissed off and this is usually when the monkeys decide it's a good time to start killing each other. So the monkeys wage war, the monkeys make hydrogenbombs, the monkeys got their entire planet wired up to explode. The monkeys just can't help it, some of the monkeys play to a sold out crowd of other monkeys. The monkeys make tropheis and then they give them to each other like it means something. Some of the monkeys think they have it all figured out. Some of the monkeys read nietzsche. The monkeys argue about nietzsche without ever giving any consideration to the fact that nietzsche was just another monkey. The monkeys make plans, the monkeys fall in love, the monkeys have sex and then they make more monkeys. The monkeys make music and then monkeys dance. Dance monkeys dance! The monkeys make a hell of alot noise. The monkeys have so much potential if they would only apply themselves. The monkeys shave their hair of their bodies in blatant denial of their true monkey nature. The monkeys build giant monkey hives that they call cities the monkeys draws alof ot imaginary lines in the dirt. The monkeys are running out of oil which is what fuels their precerious civilisation. The monkeys are polluting their planet like there is no tomorrow. The monkeys like to pretend that everything is just fine. Some of the monkeys actually believe that the entire universe was created just for their benefit. As you can see these are some messed up monkeys. This monkeys are once the ugliest and the most beatuiful creature on the planet and the monkeys don't want to be monkeys. They want to be something else but they are not."
