It wasn't until he kneeled before Her Grace to receive his pardon that the reality of Zeref's defeat truly began to sink in. He should've felt relief. He should've felt some sense of accomplishment; some sense of redemption.
He didn't. He felt conflicted. Directionless. Like he was standing at a dead end, trying to figure out how to continue forward without going back.
All this time spent fighting, all this time seeking to protect, dispelling shadows, opening wounds; all this time, yet he felt no different that day than the day before it. Deep down, he knew why. It would never matter how many times he'd been forgiven. He would never feel any different until he learned to forgive himself.
In the wake of Fiore's collective victory, he felt a new kind of defeat. All this time, the one thing he neglected to do was heal.
Main Verse. Not following 100YQ.
Open to mutuals. 18+. No smut. Written by Dayne. Previously known as @nocentis.