day 13 | season 5 | sequel to day 2 | wc; 154 | ao3 | @today-in-fic | previous fic |
Let Me In.
It’s been a while since your stomach felt as full as it does- all thanks to Mulder.
Withholding enough food for yourself hadn’t been intentional, least that’s what you say. Control had felt like it was slipping through your fingers more and more with each passing year; you could always control what and how much you put into your body but it was never with the intention to hurt yourself. Turns out you did so anyway.
You shift ever so slightly in his arms, lifting your head up just so.
“I didn’t think you noticed,” you say to him. Then quietly, “Or cared.”
Mulder hears you though, frowning and clutching at you harder.
“I noticed,” he says. “And I definitely care, Scully.” You feel his lips kiss under your eyes, his nose brushing your own.
“Your wellbeing matters to me.” You try not to cry at that. “Let me in. Let me help you.”
day 2 | season 5 | wc; 521 | ao3 | @today-in-fic | previous fic |
From today onwards I'll be posting these every day. TW: For implied eating disorder.
Eat.
Maybe she didn’t think you noticed- but what she doesn’t know is you notice everything about her- that she’s been on this health kick for two years now.
Gone were the days of eating burgers and fries, tourist-attraction ribs and copious amounts of unhealthy snacks for long journeys and stakeouts, ice cream and takeout’s. Motel vending machine dinners had been replaced with finding an actual diner. Often times, Scully would go alone, you were satisfied with your three slightly out-of-date Twinkies and sunflower seeds.
Tonight, however, you decide to join her. You were starving and a giant burger sounded good to you right now.
Scully had eaten her salad and you refrained from pointing out that a salad was on the “Starters” section for a reason and she should eat something else alongside it but that would be a waste of breath- Scully was infuriatingly stubborn.
You usually offer pieces of your own food to her which she calmly denies, occupying herself with reading reports while you spend the next three days devouring meals served for four. She never complains about being hungry- the only giveaway is the faint sound of her tummy rumbling.
Tonight there are no reports to read, tonight her stomach is growling much louder. This was the first time you had seen her eat all day and it clearly wasn’t enough.
She looks at your food with longing. You know she won’t order more and she definitely will not ask you for some of yours. You look down at your food, knowing you’ve ordered more than enough for yourself.
“You can have half,” you say, reaching for her tiny plate and dropping more than half of the fries onto it. You throw on some onion rings and a chicken drumstick, too. Finally, you halve the burger meat before passing it all back to her.
“We won’t leave this table until you’ve ate,” you tell her, speaking to her like she’s a child.
Scully glances around but there’s nobody close by to hear them- it’s late, small town residents like to be in bed by 9pm.
“It closes at 11,” she tells you.
“Good,” you say. “Gives you an hour and a half to eat.”
You don’t take a bite of your own food until you’re satisfied she is eating her fill. She starts off with the fries, eating cautiously at first as if they’re going to bite, then with more vigour as her body starts to accept the much needed sustenance.
Satisfied now, you eat what’s left over on your own plate.
You don’t breach the subject again, not until you’re laying in bed spooned behind her, feeling her bones jut out beneath her skin.
“You don’t need to punish yourself with food,” you say quietly.
She is quiet. You don’t want to lecture her, quite the opposite.
“I’ll come with you to diners more and we’ll cook more often at home. Okay?”
She nods and you move in closer.
“I want to help you. Let me.”
She twists in your arms, burying her face into your bare chest, a quiet whisper ‘okay’ muffled into your skin.
