‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐡 ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙
↣ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘰
↣ 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘹 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯 (𝘸/ 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘳𝘦𝘯, 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘮𝘪𝘯, 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘫𝘦𝘯, 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘤𝘬, 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨 & 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 + 𝘫𝘢𝘦𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘨)
“yanna?” sungchan approached her, as soon as the other boys left with their things. yanna was in the middle of wearing her hoodie, feeling the cold wind as soon as she was well-rested after rehearsals. her head snapped up at the tone of the boy’s voice.
“yeah?” she asked the boy who looked nervous. her questioning eyes made him panic a bit, it was no secret that the girl looked cute when confused. but that wasn’t what this was about.
“are... you okay?” he silently asked her, she was obviously surprised. her eyes widened a bit before smiling warmly and nodding her head.
“it was nothing, my wrist works fine. look!” she said before wiggling her wrists and even showing the boy a move that involved it. but sungchan was not amused, he tried to smile but they both know what he was really talking about. chenle was right about yanna, she doesn’t like talking about things that upset her. specially when it’s something she can deal with herself. something she’s probably upset about on her own.
but as someone who yanna has helped out before, sungchan wanted to be of comfort for her.
“you know what i’m talking about...” he mumbled, but yanna caught it of course. she tightly smiled and sighed, flopping down on the ground with her back against the mirror.
“were you put up to this because i wouldn’t talk about it?” she asked the boy, but he wasn’t sure how to answer. he’d be lying if he said that the boys haven’t talked about who would be the best to talk to her about it, but he volunteered to do it. along with renjun, jaemin, jeno, taeyong, haechan and jisung. in the end, he explained why he really wanted to do it, so the others just gave him advice on how to approach yanna and what not to say when it comes to her.
there were a lot. but what he remembered vividly was renjun’s words.
“never force her to talk about it, nudge her once and if she tells you then that means she trusts you enough to tell you. also, listen to her. just listen until she stops talking, she’ll really appreciate that.” he said.
“why don’t you just talk to her, injunie?” taeyong asked, sungchan listened in as he was also curious.
“if she wanted to talk to me about it, she already would’ve, hyung. i know she thinks it’d be unfair and selfish for her to talk about it with me, but maybe if it’s someone new then she’d feel less burdened to act okay. she knows we care about her, but everyone knows she always cares about us more.” he explained, leaving sungchan in awe at how much renjun knew about the girl.
“so? who told you to ask me? was it taeyong-hyung or injunie? maybe it was jisung, he’s always worried about me.” she rambled on, making sungchan stare at her. yanna caught his glance and immediately blinked before putting her hands inside the pockets of her hoodie.
“you wanted to on your own?” she asked.
“we all wanted to talk to you about it but i volunteered, i just felt like... i wanted to be of help to you since you kind of helped me a lot in terms of adjusting.” he explained, yanna could only nodded before looking at her toes. jeno was right, he thought to himself. that was one of the signs that yanna was upset, her looking at her toes. then the next thing would be?
he smiled as soon as yanna brought her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on it. that’s what jaemin said she would do next, it was her way of finding comfort for herself.
“they really love you, you know.” he blurted out. yanna looked at him and nodded, of course she knows that.
“that’s why it’s harder to talk to them. i don’t want them to suppress their feelings just for my own, i don’t want them to feel bad for me. i know they’re happy about this, i am too. nct 2020 is a huge opportunity for all of us, but...” she sighed, now picking at the sleeves of her hoodie. another thing jisung noted yanna would do when she’s upset.
“but my solo album was also a huge opportunity for me. i feel bad that i’m sad about it, i feel... selfish. but at the same time, this was going to happen either way. why did it have to clash?” she asked, more to herself than sungchan who was listening in.
“i worked so hard for it...” her voice broke, making sungchan panic as she buried her head to her knees. he glanced around, forgetting no one was there besides him.
“hug her.” haechan said, making renjun turn to him a bit.
“what? you don’t want to let him hug your girlfriend? are you threatened?” he teased renjun, making the other boys laugh.
“hug her, she’ll like it. REALLY-“ his words got cut off by renjun jokingly attacking him.
sungchan carefully sat next to yanna, putting his arm around her a bit before patting her shoulder and head as she silently cried. he couldn’t hug the girl, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable with him and not wanting to annoy renjun even though he knew it was just a joke.
but yanna felt a bit better with it, it was enough. atleast she could let it out and not keep it all inside anymore.
“are they gonna be mad i told you how i felt instead of telling them?” she asked, chin once again on top of her knees.
“well, probably not? but, you could tell them too so they’d feel less sad about it. they just want to know how you’re taking it. specially renjun-hyung, he’s worried and he knows exactly why you’re not telling him.” the boy explained, yanna could only sniffle and chuckle.
“then why didn’t you tell me that earlier? that they just wanted to know how i’m feeling about it?” the girl asked.
“uh, renjun-hyung said i should never interrupt you...” he mumbled, smiling a bit before shyly holding his nape. yanna also smiled, silently pinching renjun’s cheek in her head.
“am i being selfish?” the girl asked. sungchan became nervous, not wanting to say anything rude. so he chose to think hard before speaking up.
“i don’t think so. just because you want something for yourself, that doesn’t mean you’re automatically selfish. like you said, this comeback was bound to happen. it just came earlier than we all expected, so it’s not really you stripping everyone off of a chance to promote this album by feeling bad your solo album was postponed. it’s just you wanting something for yourself, that you rightfully deserve anyways.” the boy explained, making her smile.
“i’m sure it’s what everyone thinks, yanna. we’d never blame you for wanting to make music that represents you. just like how you don’t blame me for being happy about debuting.” he quietly said, hoping he was right about the last part. yanna of course noticed the boy’s uncertainty in the last sentence, making her turn to him with a smile.
“of course, i’m happy for you!” she said with a laugh.
silence filled the room, yanna composing herself as she thought of how she would tell the dream members she was sorry for keeping it all inside.
sungchan on the other hand was confused if he should tell the other members what yanna said or just let her tell them herself. as he thought of taeyong, he remembered what that hyung said about yanna.
“if she looks bothered or still contemplating after, just buy her ice cream. it helps her think clearly when she’s drained.” the older one said, making sungchan nod.
“do you want some ice cream before heading home?” sungchan asked, yanna immediately smiled and nodded.
“i guess you really did talk to all of them.” she mumbled, grabbing her bag. sungchan could only smile.
“but i bet you didn’t talk to jaehyun-hyung?” the girl asked, leaving him confused.
“he never would’ve let you pat my head like that.” she said while laughing, remembering how protective jaehyun is. specially when it comes to his favorite way of comforting her.
↣ 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘴 ♡
