hello striae i saw this meme and thought of your max/kelly mommy kink. especially the ">telling mommy no. are you insane"
drabble for tysh: kelly/max, mature, ~1k.
Rupert says, "There's nothing on the menu Max can eat."
Kelly responds, glacially, "It is the very first day of the offseason." Then she tells Max, "You're getting the veal sweetbreads with morels."
Checo’s doing something funny with his waterglass and someone else’s credit card so Max doesn’t really hear her but she orders for him when the waiter comes and it works out alright. When the food comes out and Max’s meal is put down in front of him he looks to Rupert incredulously and Rupert suggests, “Only eat half of it.”
At the halfway point Kelly says, “Just one more bite?” and he hasn’t eaten anything but blanched chicken breast in like nine months so he makes the bite very big and fucking scarfs it, plus three or eight more generous nibbles, and then his plate’s empty but it turns out Kelly wasn’t very hungry after all even though she ordered this massive pasta dish that came with two sides so it’s only chivalrous to finish it for her, except then her appetite comes back so they order chocolate lava cake and split it.
The aftermath leaves Max feeling cheerful and sleepy. While the staff clears the carnage Kelly dabs chocolate sauce off the corner of Max’s lip with her napkin, then kisses the new clean spot she’s made, a peck at first but then a proper kiss. Gianpiero tries to pay but Max put his card down when they came in; fighting about it brings Max’s energy back up and their party spills into the street in a cacophony of whooping and laughter.
“Make sure to work that off tomorrow,” Rupert says, and Max flips him off, grinning, and doesn’t think much of it until he’s brushing his teeth in their bathroom while Kelly tries to get Rupert fired.
“Bradley did not overreach like that.”
“Overreargh Lbwike Bwhaht?”
“You haven’t been on break hardly twenty minutes! Isn’t he supposed to have worked for Carlos? Isn’t Carlos Spanish? Surely there’s—culturally.”
Max spits and rinses. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“It’s just very controlling.”
They have sex and fall asleep with Max still inside Kelly, and the next morning the lady Kelly pays so neither of them have to learn how to turn their stove on has made enough waffles for the whole paddock, a rasher of bacon, sausages with maple syrup, a fruit salad, eggs two ways, toast, and hashbrowns.
Kelly’s sitting at the eating bar. When Max stumbles into the kitchen and kisses the back of her ear, trying to figure out if he’s still asleep or not, Kelly slides a hand into his boxers and grabs his dick.
“Morning, baby.”
He laughs into the ear he just kissed, nips a kiss onto her jaw below it. “Good morning.” Pushing his hips into her grip a little: “Miss it already? It missed you.”
“How charming,” says Kelly, but in that delicate way that means she actually did think it was charming. Her hand is warm and smooth with lotion. She twists up his shaft and then back down it, cups his balls like she’s putting them on a little shelf, and squeezes just tightly enough to make him moan.
“Whatssa. Food?”
“Well, Max. I was thinking I should maybe diet a little and I thought we could—”
Except Max pulls her hand off him by the wrist. He tries to take a step back, frowning, but she doesn’t let go of his balls so he abandons the attempt at separation pretty quick. “No, no. Why? There is no reason for, when you’re at a weight that you like and after it took that therapist guy six months to help you after the Abercrombie fucks got into your head. Did Daniil say something? Kelly he is so fucking stupid—”
“—Max, no.” Kelly uses the hand she has on him to guide Max back to her, him standing and her sitting in a barstool set in front of the kitchen island heaped with their provisions. The height difference this way is nice because there basically isn’t one, and they’re right eye-to-eye, twin concerned expressions, mirrored downturned mouths.
“Then?”
“I mean that I want to eat—more. And it would help me if we ate the same way.”
He blinks, recalibrating. Doesn’t seem like he has to tell her her body’s already perfect the way it is and thank fuck because he’s only read one Teen Vogue article on the right way to approach your partner about the warning signs of eating disorders, and he doesn’t remember what was in the article because he’d only opened it to jerk off to the pictures of anorexic women.
Max is still queuing up a response that’s not what the fuck are you talking about, because he already asked that last night, when Kelly starts stroking his dick again. Her free hand pulls his boxers down to mid-thigh, and he laughs, distracted. She grins back at him, pulling at the crease of his thigh where it meets his ass, making a little cup with her other hand so his dick can slide into her warm palm, so he drags her barstool further out from the counter with her still sitting in it, shrieking as she moves.
“We can do that,” Max says, fourty-five minutes later while they try to find waffles without come on them. “Of course whatever you want we will make happen and I’ll help however I can with whatever goal you have. Only with my, with the, eating more means I will gain weight and all the weight I gain is weight I’ll have to lose at the end of the summer so it’s better for me to be careful. And the car, next year, there’s really—well I’ve said so I know you know but we’re not going to have a year like the last one again, and it’s unacceptable not to be disciplined when things are under my control and the performance will suffer. But you shouldn’t eat this way and I’m glad you’re not because it is obviously not nice.”
She doesn’t answer. He straightens up from the waffle chafing dish and finds her gazing into their open fridge. He tries to figure out what’s so interesting but the only things in her eyeline are meal replacement shakes.
When rbr gave GP a teenager with a lisp and strong accent and told to keep him safe, of course he learned how to understand Max better than anyone.
ik you mean this in a sentimental way and it is very sweet but rbr gave gp a teenager &gp responded with dutch duolingo, a self-taught crash course on autism diagnosis, went to the library and checked out "anger management for your eight year old", got two pages into that--realized there was no chance in hell--and went full bill o'reilly fuck it WE'RE DOING IT LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hiiii hello good time of day to ye dropping in to remark that i today stumbled upon an occasion of max talking about those three bangles he used to regularly wear and i was wondering if you in your official capacity as my favorite maxkelly opinionhaver on this site have any particular thoughts abt all that (i.e. one he bought himself one from his mother one from kelly) 🎤 (apologies if you've already talked about this i did have myself a bit of digging but you know how tumblr search function is 😔) sincerely tumblr user @renndistanz 💜
renn thank you for this appointment... i am taking the position as favourite kellymax opinion haver SO seriously truly I'm honoured. if anyone starts to threaten my title lmk and I will step up immediately 🙏
max used to regularly wear silver cartier love bracelets :]
📸 - max's instagram, 2022.
I'll quickly give an overview and then introduce the self-bought bracelet you're talking about for people who aren't in the know, and then I have something to say about max-victoria-sophie as a trio before we get into kelly/max.
to my understanding all previous cartier bracelet scholarship was done by @karlmarxverstappen and anons. this is the load-bearing post that introduced ME to this #situation and here is the best love bracelet adjacent post ever written. I'm building on their work and I'd be remiss not to cite the queen 👑
📸 - image taken from renn's post.
📹 - translated version of linked interview where max explains one bracelet is from kelly and one's from his mother.
the cartier love bracelet timeline: these dates are rough so bear with me but he started with one in 2019 (that picture's from august but here's another great clear shot from september) and added the second later in 2021. he used to basically always have least one of the bracelets on and now he never does... this tragic drop-off happened between the 2023-24 f1 seasons.
the version max wore specifically were the open cuff model, probably because he had to take them off so frequently to drive. the classic versions of the bracelets fasten with two screws, needing a special driver to remove and that's obviously impractical considering... but it would be of course much sexier if max was screwed into his jewelry so let's all just pretend... here is a great photo of the underside of max's wrist, where the open cuff is visible.
as the linked interview reveals, one of the bracelets was from his mother and one was from kelly! sophie and victoria both have cartier love bracelets as well (the classic versions, as best I can tell), so the three of them have a cute matching trio, and then kelly also has a gold one, so she and max have different-cute matching couple's bracelets.
it looks like sophie's is gold and victoria's is rose-gold, so with max's silver they've collected the whole set :]
📸 - sophie's instagram, 2021.
I like this post because you can see all three of them wearing their bracelets at the same time (you might have to zoom in on victoria but it's on her right hand!).
to me, the most notable thing here from the family angle is that they're tied to his loved ones, and max lived in these things for the entirety of his first title fight.
it makes a lot of sense to me that the guy who's comfort blanket was a scrap of one of his mother's maternity dresses, and who bought his sister a louis vuitton bag to celebrate his first points, and who obviously highly values his mother's race week candle lighting ritual, would like to have a physical item connecting him to the women of his family during the most intense and isolating period of his life! grounding himself and taking them with him.
and, at the end of that maiden title fight, he wore both bracelets while celebrating his first championship :]
📸 - celebrating his first championship :]
although it's notable that jos doesn't have a matching bracelet there's about ten million reasons why that makes perfect sense to me and there's not any commentary i can bring to the table that you can't also arrive at after .2 seconds of thought. in addition to the complexity of the jos and max relationship, and how embedded jos was in max's life during that first title fight (no token needed for him to be 'there'), not to mention how strange it would be if sophie and jos were in cute matching jewellery terms after everything, it could really be as simple as "this is just for the three of us".
HOWEVER. that makes it VERY FUNNY that it seems like raymond vermeulen, max's career-long manager and jos' long-time business partner and friend, appears also to have a cartier love bracelet.
📸 - max's instagram, 2021.
i didn't investigate the raymond situation further but if somebody else does please let me know what you find. also i'm not including it as part of this post because surely it's a coincidence but here is a photo of max standing next to david coulthard, known verstappie, where he seems to be wearing. that's right. and both the raymond and david pictures are from 2021 so the acquisition timeline is about correct...
apart from that I don't really have much to say. it seems straightforwardly nice that there's this connective thread between them and i also think it's sweet sophie and victoria wear theirs actively even after max betrayed! the group, because it makes me suspect the bracelets are also a mother-daughter symbol, meaningful between the two of them in addition to the max trio.
i spent a long time looking at photos so for the sake of collecting everything in one place here's a non-exhaustive list of
sophie wearing her bracelet: in vietnam, holding her niece, with her grandkids, on a yacht (twice) (three times), and in front of a fountain.
victoria wearing her bracelet: with her family, in a video, on a yacht, during golden hour, with her husband, holding her baby, and at the paddock.
before we get to max's self-bought middle bracelet, i found out when obsessively looking at pictures for this post that from 2018-19 max had a DIFFERENT self-bought (?) emotional support bracelet he never took off until suddenly he trashed it without warning 🤩 it's the topmost one on his wrist here.
📸 - max's instagram, 2018.
here is is pairing this older corded bracelet with the iconic out of office t-shirt, wearing it in his sim rig, and working out. no insight from me here; i just thought this is cute.
the corded bracelet vanishes unceremoniously around exactly the time max starts wearing his first cartier love, in 2019, and then the self-bought bracelet with the metal beads surfaces around 2022, the year after he's started wearing two cartier love bracelets at the same time.
but back to the bracelet in question! @fortunefevas made this fantastic gif showing it off. fortune if you're reading this i owe you my life.
📹 - gif taken from fortunefevas' post.
another really amazing wonderful image comes from @usernyoom's edit of mark thompson's picture, here below, and truly an especial shoutout to nyoom for this because it was way way way harder than you'd expect finding a still image in HQ of this stupid bracelet! i felt like i was going insane and then this image came to me, guardian angel style.
📸 - image taken from nyoom's post.
okay so unfortunately i have no idea what this thing is :]
i'm such shit at jewellery ID and don't know a thing about men's accessories anyway, plus, all cable bracelets basically look the same lowkey and i've found it impossible to locate a still image of this damn thing that doesn't look like it was taken in 1913. ALSO although it's cute the style is so generic that any number of jewellers could've made it :[
maybe the base is something similar to a david yurman? which he's then personalized with beads? or it's a bracelet you buy and customize at the same time, like a pandora kind of thing? zooming in on nyoom's picture we can see the style of clasp fairly well. the two beads on the very ends of his string look like the dutch flag, maybe that's a starting place for tracking the bracelet down for somebody who has a vocabulary about these kinds of things (and the other one visible in the above picture is maybe the belgium flag? but that final stripe looks more navy than black?).
if you, reader, would like to give identifying this thing a shot, the best supplementary materials i can provide besides the above are, these two photos with martijn (martin garrix), and these other photos for some reason also with martijn.
minimal commentary and no analysis coming up... all i've got to say is that it looks good on him and i wish he'd bring it back, but if i had to pick between this and the cartier love, it's cartier love no question any day of the week. i think it's very sweet max bought himself nice jewellery presumably as a "yay I'm doing well at work and I have money now" present, and i think it's cute he seemingly wears one set of accessories at a time (rip in peace 2018 cable bracelet), and i wish i could make out those beads better.
okay! kelly/max cartier bracelet time! opinions delivered in my official capacity as your favourite maxkelly opinion haver (thank youuuuu)!
on the kelly wearing cartier end, her jewellery situation is different from max's because she wears so much more of it and what she puts on for outfits she's planning to post are controlled/dictated by sponsorships and suchlike. max only has to worry about his watch. who knows how often she wears hers in private, but of the five people with the bracelets in this post (excluding raymond and david...) she wears hers the least.
but, making up for that, she wore hers first! kelly's cartier love bracelet predates her relationship with max. maybe she had hers and max liked it, or victoria and sophie liked it and suggested cartier love as the model they'd all buy too?
the first photo i could find of kelly wearing hers was near the bottom of her instagram feed, from 2016.
📸 - kelly's instagram, 2016.
going to show you this photo from the year after as well mostly because i think this bathing suit is terrible and i need us to collectively figure out if it's "so bad it's good" or if it's just bad.
📸 - kelly's instagram, 2017.
more recently, you can make it out as part of her ensemble for the monza gp in 2022, and in st tropez in 2024. there's an especially clear view of it here from a photo she posted in paris:
📸 - kelly's instagram, 2022.
i'm now going to step us a little bit sideways but trust me just trust me. i'm connecting the dots i've connected them. Alright.
on max's birthday in 2025 kelly posted
how lovely how nice. uhm they look in love and his swim shorts are so cute. let's all go to st tropez together guys. but uhm okay you may have noticed because it's a little hard to overlook that
📸 - images from my post.
I Would Call This Easily The Most Obvious Hickey I've Ever Seen In A Celebrity Photo. righttttt on the tit. boob bite on main and she posted it on his birthday.
as my friend/the greatest scholar of our age put it at the time: "Kelly owns that man and they both like it like that. every day he gets to go out there and be max verstappen and every day he gets to come home and make no decisions whatsoever while a hot woman bites his tits and when she doesn't feel like doing that she lets him play on his computer with his friends".
i'd now like to introduce my public claiming kink theory. the theory is that max and kelly have a joint public claiming kink.
it's a match made in heaven... kelly seems like a very possessive person and max seems like someone who responds very well to being possessed... bruised nipple gate obviously so so so important but max is also, constantly, stealing kelly's pr gifts and using them on stream. most notably kelly went to a padel event for tiffany and max has stolen every piece of that, and then posted himself wearing her monogrammed sweatband on his instagram.
there are also just so so SO many self-posted pictures of them kissing each other. people who are insane were so shitty on social media we don't get cute/casual posts the way we used to, but when they do crop up on each other's feeds they leave no room for doubt lmfao :D :D here's another set of incomplete lists for you, because there's so many instances of
kelly/max in parc fermé: monaco 2021 (and again), abu dhabi 2021 (recognise that video?), portugal 2021, suzuka 2022, abu dhabi 2023, cota 2024 (through the barrier!!) abu dhabi 2025, this series could go on forever...
kelly/max on a yacht: while he grabs her thigh, while he's wearing the love bracelets, as she's grinning into him, with pals in miami, on kelly's birthday (this is a five-star all-time favourite picture series in my books), you get the point...
kelly/max relaxing: in a pool, dancing on a rooftop, in a club (w/a huge bouquet of roses and that's its own thing), during summer break, at a party, on their fifth anniversary... i have to arbitrarily cut myself off here before my brain melts.
final one i swearrrr if you're only going to click one choose: these three pictures from new year's 2022 :]
📸 - kelly's instagram, 2022.
another of one of my favourite pictures of them ever. a romantic/chaste one to cap off that insane collection of links above :')
i've seen people who really don't like kelly saying that she's one-sidedly forcing these public displays of affection on max and is, the logic is so misogynist it's actually incoherent, trying to gain ?? clout ?? by ?? using him ?? but, frankly, if you subscribe to that line of thought get the fuck off my blog hahaha... so many understandable reasons to dislike kelly piquet and that's not even close to one of them.
anyway my point is that i think max is a guy with very strong/firm boundaries as he's proven over and over and over again, and that if his partner was doing something he didn't want or like he'd have mentioned that to her sometime in the past six years.
plus, they don't just like it one way around:
📸 - max's instagram, 2021.
rhetorical question: what's a relationship announcement if not a public claim?
max and kelly posted their first photo together, their relationship launch, january 2021 :]
would anybody like to guess what max is wearing in the picture!?
📸 - zero points for guessing correctly.
where i'm going with all this is that max had a stealth collar that he wore constantly?
oh i'm sureeeee. i'm sure. no doubt in my mind that both parties involved enjoyed that very much.
He was basically saying I hatewatched you suffering from my watch ❤️❤️ So glad that the other Mercedes won ❤️❤️ and not you ❤️❤️
📸 - george russell's instagram, 2026. original caption below.
Great Sunday watching lots of racing, training and on the boat @pershingyacht 💪☀️
Congrats to @mercedesamg on winning Nurburgring 24h 🏆
i had to pick an image for the post so i choose the one most directly related to your message but the whole ? is the word carousel. i think i've heard that. btw age reveal i'm 97. the whole carousel is a funny combo.... L + ratio + hot sweaty gym girlfriend + my yacht (#myyacht) + has everyone seen my biceps today??????? no questions about kimi antonelli in my comments section please and thankyou.
you using russtappen as the ship portmanteau has reminded me of a debate i had w/a pal where he told me he refused to use gax "[because] it's not even pronounceable, like the E is a fairly critical element to the pronunciation of George" and i told him "russtappen is the name of software that doesnt work" 🥰 and our summit concluded w/the agreement it was very appropriate that george/max is weird unintuitive harsh bad to say and hear, AND a software that doesn't work.
