— for @automvtic
for a good few minutes, all yejun did was listen. listen to eric nam’s voice coming off their small wireless speaker, listen to jaeseok’s stable heartbeat under his ear as he claimed his chest as a pillow. the theoretical silence was comfortable, comfortable as anything always was with seok, keeping him unrushed and unworried, content to just breathe in the moment and in the familiar smell that in his mind equated to home. yet a few songs in and he couldn’t help but let his mind wander as his fingers drew mindless patterns against seok’s chest. couldn’t help but pay attention to the lyrics of each song, romantic as ever (he kept repeating eric was his future husband, dared to dream) or bitterly heartbroken. some days ago, any of those would’ve brought tears to his eyes, resonating oh so deeply with his own anguished self. right now, however, they only ached a little, leaving his wistful as ever — that hopeless romantic boy who found a home inside his soul and refused to die.
he couldn’t help but wonder, either — what was jaeseok thinking about as he, too, listened? usually it would seem like a silly question for himself, even; seokie was simply not a romantic and, at best, would just be enjoying the music in spite of its contents. nonetheless everything he seemed to know and take for granted seemed to have had its foundations shaken ever since one of his mutual friends afirm with such certainty that jaeseok clearly had a lot of romantic feelings for a specific someone, crediting it as the real reason as to why he was still single. usually he would’ve just have brushed the statement off; it didn’t make no sense. not anymore. he’d heard that same story just too many times at that point to not think about it, maybe a little too much. but if it was true… surely seokie would’ve told him, right? they… did talk about those things to each other all the time, didn’t they? and maybe… maybe, if he had such an affirmation, that incomprehensible bitter and petty feeling in his gut would go away. “seok-ah…,” the name was out before he could think any further. yejun chewed at his bottom lip, then forcing himself to continue. “can i ask… i was wondering… do you have, like, a crush? like… romantic?”