I might get cancelled for this, but I find it disrespectful when people don’t stand for the national anthem… you need to show respect and stand up. I get chills every time I hear, "It was cool, nothing fire, nothing broke. Keep simple, nothing tired, nothing old..."
Headcanons for being in an evil polycule with Lottie, Shauna, and Natalie
note: i could not write a full-fledged piece for the life of me, so. Here ya go!! Oh My God This Is So Long Why Is It So Long, toxic/codependent/manipulative/abusive relationships, sfw (has kissing, that's all), i tried my best to show that this dynamic isn't all good or all bad, i do not acknowledge canon much in this one, mentions ptsd episodes and physical violence, but not explicitly
DEFINITELY TOXIC
but hot, really really hot
for one, these three are always at odds with each other
during the first winter, shauna isn't as openly antagonistic, but increasingly pushes boundaries with all three of you
and then the circle goes as follows:
shauna/lottie does something crazy -> nat gets pissed and convinces you to take some time away from them -> they join forces to guilt you into forgiving them -> you ask nat to give them another chance and she agrees
rinse and repeat
shauna lets you all have bigger portions than the rest of the team sometimes
lottie convinces you three to partake in meditation (shauna and nat aren’t super spiritual, but they do it for you and lottie)
nat helps you all build your huts, in one small way or another
you proposed the idea that your huts should all be close together (that was their plan anyways)
you also take turns spending the night with at least one of them every night
it's comforting to feel their warm bodies against yours
hear their soft snores and breathing, it's relaxing
it's also scary to see them get mad at each other
you feel the need to separate them, keep them safe so that no one ends up hurt again
you remember how long it took lottie to recover from shauna's beating
shauna promises you nothing like that will ever happen again, but you can't help but doubt
nat doesn't do it (consciously) but she makes sure that you feel safest in her presence
lottie can be destructive, and shauna doesn't exactly have a great track record of keeping her loved ones alive
you think deep down that none you have a great record of that, either, but you keep that to yourself
in the summertime, you spend time with lottie swimming in the lake
seeing you two splash and float around lazily puts a smile on nat's face, and a slight grin on shauna's
as lottie leans down to kiss you, you wrap your arms around her waist and press her close
you boop her nose and she squints her eyes, her mouth forms a toothy smile
she's doing a little better, compared to a couple months ago
shauna isn't as affectionate, she makes up for it with possessiveness
keeping you outside for longer than necessary, "working" with the meat as you sit and watch
she likes keeping you nearby, controlling who you interact with and for how long
sometimes she just takes your arm and yanks you away from a conversation you were having
it's irritating, and you tell her as much, but she keeps doing it anyways
nat feels bad for "neglecting" you all so much
you tell her keeping the group alive and on a steady path isn't "neglect"
it's leadership and a lot of responsibility
you damn near manhandle her onto your cot and just force her to rest in your arms
she "fights" back, but it always ends with you "winning"
your victory is feeling her scalp underneath your chin and her breath on your neck
you let her sleep for as long as both your bodies allow (which is to say, a very long time)
you both awake when you're roughly shaken, making you and nat jolt upwards and your heart rates accelerate immediately (it was the longest nat had managed without night terrors in a while)
shauna grunts out that she's finished dinner and that the rest of the group is waiting to eat (she made everyone else wait)
lottie enters your hut and says that you both look like shit, which makes shauna breath out a laugh and piss natalie off
you ask if you at least look like hot shit, striking a pose
they all snort/giggle at your awful joke, but it's all in good fun
during dinner, you sit in between nat and lottie, with shauna across the three of you
afterwards, depending on who's turn it is, you leave hand in hand to spend the night with her
if it's lottie, you both crawl through her window (it's more fun than using the door)
if she's feeling vulnerable, she wants to hold you pressed against her chest, arm underneath your head so she can keep her other arm in place around your waist
she's always warm, but not unbearably so, unlike someone else (cough cough shauna) so you're always a decent temperature in her bed
in the mornings, she likes to watch you wake up naturally
drool, mouth open, hair messy, morning breath and all
you call her a weirdo every time, but she just kisses your head and looks at you with those doe eyes and asks you to repeat that (you don't, you just turn the other way)
if it's shauna, she likes her space, so you end up on the floor (jk)
she does tend to spread out quite a bit, so be prepared to wake up to at least one arm or leg over your body
as stated, she does run hot as well, so you better get used to it or be prepared to spend the night on the floor (her words, not mine)
but she does let you take the cot sometimes, if she's feeling generous/not in a bad mood, which is rare
she's not a morning person, but she doesn't give you too much flack, especially if you're slow to start your day as well
she insists on styling your hair for the day, and she's surprisingly gentle with your scalp as well
when she's done, she picks out your outfit as well
it's really attractive when she adjusts any irregularities she doesn't like, she's so focused on your appearance you feel flustered every time
you have to ask (and she refuses half of the time or if you ask too much so don't force it too much), but she kisses you before you two have to leave the hut
if it's nat, you both sleep as described above, but sometimes she has bad nights (cough cough ptsd)
and you have to calm her down, remind her that you two are safe, no one's hurt, she can rest and go back to sleep
you watch her eyes slowly close and feel her heart settle, it hurts your heart to watch her panic and/or cry like that
if she can't or doesn't want to go back to sleep, you both just whisper about anything
except what she has to do the next day, you tell her that can wait until the sun comes up
she tells you about her life back in Wiskayok, her old friends, how much she misses the little things, like showering or skipping class
she has such a nice voice, you have to fight to stay awake (you're scared she'll think you don't care about her if you fall asleep)
eventually she tires herself out from whispering and listening to your heartbeat, and she falls asleep again, allowing you to pass out with her
it's complicated, for sure, but the bond you all share is so deeply inbedded in your beings, separating feels like a fate worse than death
