#yikesdiscourse

[sandflakedraws]

So, related personal anecdote (stay tuned for good news later in the post):

The abot raid came at . perhaps the worst time it could have? I was already having a major depressive episode; bad enough that I pulled away from my friends, bad enough that i went on hiatus, bad enough i didn’t eat much of anything for 2-3 days, like. worst episode of the year bad. Rest assured, the root cause had nothing to do with them, and everything to do with the fact that I was very soon to move back into my abuser’s home for an undetermined amount of time. and none of my usual coping methods were working.

I’m in that home as of yesterday. Like, timeline wise it was gonna happen this soon. I was actually supposed to go back July 25th but the furniture folks wanted to retrieve their stuff early, and I didn’t fancy camping out on the floor surrounded by laundry for 3 days.

.

So when I saw what happened, it was more or less just a rotten cherry on top of a bigger, fuller, already long existing shit cake. ‘This may as well happen now’ kind of deal. And it kind of .. gave me perspective in a roundabout way.

That maybe it was time to reach for help for those other things. Maybe it was time to admit, to own up that I’ve always had a real hard time, even if that’s old news to folks who’ve been with me for a while. That I can stop putting holds on trying to quantify when something I experienced counted as ‘bad enough’ to warrant asking for help. 

So honestly? these fiascoes got me to :

- come off hiatus, start speaking with friends and people again because

- actually ask for direct help on tumblr again for the first time in years - get me hype for directly engaging my followers again, which in turn had me see... just how many good, loving, giving folks there are out there. kind messages came in bucket loads.

like, that’s so many lovely people ... that i was lucky enough to be blessed by. i want the emphasis here to be on look how many sweet folks there are, kind people exist on here. - make more excited to establish the kind of back and forth i used to have with followers a while back, before these shenaniganizers 

so .. not total loss

And I wanna just give a big

Thank You

to everyone out there who have contributed to making this space a kinder one for me. you all deserve a gentle evening listening to relaxing rain, cuddled comfortably in soft blankets, with a food ya like ♥

[chlmera]

re: yikesdiscourse last night

i wont apologize for having an opinion on whether or not abot is Bad (spoiler alert: it’s fantastic and the author is incredible), but i will say last night i was unmedicated and out of control. for that reason, i would like to apologize to anybody who legitimately feels that this fic is not for them, whether that reason is bc of trauma, or even just personal preference--and if i upset you by being unreasonably aggressive, that’s on me. 

HOWEVER. if you feel as though telling the author to kill herself and delete all her social media (see @abreachoftrust) is not only acceptable but also does not fall under the umbrella of harassment, block me right now. i have absolutely zero tolerance for witch hunts, especially on this hellsite, and if you’re going to send hate, send it to me. 

[sandflakedraws]

1oomg replied to your post: headsup for safety

Did you kill a man?

[sandflakedraws]

headsup for safety

In the coming days I’m going to be dealing with some #yikesdiscourse (I’ll use that tag for those of you with tag blocker)

So! If you want that sort of thing off your dash (i know i do), here’s a chance to block/unfollow me, temporarily or otherwise. I bring this up because it covers something near and dear to me, and is intertwined with a good chunk of art I’ve put here (i’m talkin in the ballpark of 126+ separate images). 

The goal here is to reach a peace, or at least a greater level of understanding and civility. I trust everyone to react patiently, smartly, calmly, and with this goal always in mind. And the invitation to talk extends to and with me, and to me alone. I can only speak for myself.

[sandflakedraws]

there should be screenshots of what the "death threats" were because i heard that it was a survivor saying "i hope pedos die" which isnt a threat to begin with and was a response to an adult making sexual remarks about ritsu iirc.

Will do!

Of note : both users got the boot for this behavior, since they both broke the rules.

[sandflakedraws]

Me and my best friend met a decade ago through writing angsty, violent, emotional fan fictions and I’m really disturbed and feel really isolated by this new purity culture and making really wild claims when something is perceived ‘problematic’. Me and my best friend went through horrible things and it was just a creative outlet, and we bonded over it and are stable, normal people. Nowadays I’d be too scared to talk about it publically, and haven’t written since for fear of harassment :(

The fear for this kind of harassment should never have been put on the table anyways.

[sandflakedraws]

I’m an abuse survivor and I feel like I only hear public criticism of all forms of abuse in fiction in a disparaging way. I don’t like to talk about it for my own reasons and I get uncomfortable when a small portion of abuse survivors speak on everyone’s behalf in a pretty narrow, misled righteous way. I enjoy whump and dark fics without it needing to be ‘obviously bad’ cuz I have a moral compass. Sorry you have to deal with discourse and I hope you have a lovely day 🙏

Thank you love, this is very helpful~

[sandflakedraws]

I think one thing I've seen and been thinking about is a lot of your art from ABoT isn't about Mob healing but instead about Reigen. I was introduced to ABoT through you're art and I thought it would be a fic about Reigen (and Ritsu honestly because we see him having more supporting moments with Reigan than Mob), but then was surprised when it was a fic that dealt with Mob's trauma and abuse from Mogami, and I think for some that can be a little jarring and confusing.

You must be thinking of attic au~ And this numbers a bit because there’s no other way for me to get the idea out there other than to draw it myself. I’m not a writer, so this is the prime way I communicate my ideas.

But rest assured~ supportive moments with abot!Mob exists in my art.

I will say, that Reigen’s role as a caretaker in abot is very important to me as well~ It’s valid to explore both sides, especially as trying to be a caretaker in the future is something important to me.