#yomosprincess

[yourdeadprince]

3. For the picture ask :^)

3. A picture that makes you smileI’m a tumblr trash, sorry not sorry bro

Send me a number and I’ll post a picture

[yourdeadprince]

I'll regret that I hate the anon feature (well I hate using it) for the secret thing - I think I'm too damaged to ever fall in love with a person genuinely, so when someone comes up and shows real interest in me, I push them away, but start feeling bad for it right away. So I struggle with keeping them close, but at the same keeping them away from me.

When I’m out, for example at the mall, I often observe people and try to find aesthetically pleasing features in them, no matter how small it could be. Unfortunately it gets me down later because everyone seems so pretty and handsome while I feel like an ugly shit.

Tell me a secret (anon or not) and I’ll tell you one of mine.

[yourdeadprince]

A fact about you that's definitely true - you're precious ;; my precious ;;; no I don't leave in a cave and only eat fish. Don't worry.

I’m made of gold and have magic features– NICE

Send me a fact about myself you think is probably true.

[yourdeadprince]

yomosprincess said: Fite me.

I’m always ready, bro.

yomosprincess said: No you’re cute.

Nope, YOU are ;;;

[yourdeadprince]

yomosprincess said: You look so cute omg ;;;

You meant tired probably

[yourdeadprince]

yomosprincess said: Why did you make me cry -

That was not intended--

[yourdeadprince]

☄

You care. You really do and that’s truly amazing ;;;

Send me ☄ and I will tell you one thing I like about you.

[yourdeadprince]

yomosprincess said: I will personally kick your ass my friend. You won’t die as a lonely shit, because you can’t be lonely as long as I am here. I am here and I am seriously worried about you. Life is not easy, I know that, we all carry our own burden, I know that - I have seen some shit and you know that. I don’t mean to say that, wow I’ve been through worse than you stop complaining. No. No. It hurts me to see that someone I love and care about has to go through the things I’ve seen too. You’re still young - and don’t try to be like ‘Stop playing this I’m older than you card’, because I am going to play that card. When I was 16 years old I’d thought I’d die young. When I was 17 I nearly jumped out of a hospitals window because I thought my life wouldn’t make sense, with 19 I was told I have only 10 years more to live - … with 21 … everything turns out to be okay. I work on getting my shit together and living a happier life. I know it gets better, because it really does. Some wounds never heal, I know that, I know it so well. My trauma will never vanish, I’ll always have DID, I’m scared that my children will have the same depression as I do - but all those things, don’t make my life less enjoyable. All I needed was to learn to live them. What I am trying to say is - there’s always a way to make things better. Please… Martin you’re still young, so many people care for you, don’t destroy a life that hasn’t even started yet. I know we don’t know each other for a long time, I know that I am annoying, clingy and most probably rude - but I really really really love and care for you. I just want you to be okay, and I know that there is always a away to improve things. So please don’t give up on yourself like that.

Primo, sorry that I’ve not replied earlier. And secundo - I don’t know what to say or how to write down what I feel, though I’ll try.

I’m glad you think so about me, I mean, that you care. Maybe my words sound empty but I AM GLAD. My problem is that even when everybody around me does care I still can’t.  I cannot understand why everyone bothers to talk with me or cares about me when everything I wish is to vanish. I don’t perceive myself as a valuable part of this society, I’m rather this weird loner on the very edges of it. I have no clue why people see me the way they do because all I see is piece of dumb shit which can be easily replaced. My family and friends would be much happier if I wasn’t me or if I didn’t exsist at all. I’m trying to change myself, to shut up when necessary or to help when I see a problem but I constantly see people who are much better than me in every goddamn part of living and that makes me pretty depressed. I hate loosing and seeking for help, I was told to be smart from the very beginning and now it won’t go away from my head.  I’m at the point where I’d love to cross that magic barrier and collapse. Overwork myself. Starve myself to the point where I’ll faint.  I don’t like myself, I barely accept my look and character. 

I’m sorry for being such negative whinny. I appreciate everything but I’m not the best when it goes to talking about such matter, sorry ;;;