#yoonjion

[saidrabbles]

now i know

a/n: hello !! i know i literally fell off the face of the earth and i don’t know if i am fully back but i had the sudden power to write. i have several ongoing drafts that are unfinished, but this one might be the oldest. i wrote this after the first few eps of tomorrow aired. so it's only fit i come back w a joong-gil story!

pairing: park jong-gil x reader

warnings: mentions of suicide, self-harm

summary: park jong-gil has been working for jumadeung for a very long time, he had his principles and was strict in following them. that was until you came along. you were part of the risk management team that he hated so much, but he couldn't help but become curious about you.

.

he was feared and respected by all who worked in jumadeung. he was one the elite members, and he was known to be the most strict leader of the escort team. he portrayed no sympathy to the dead souls that are to be escorted, and he believed suicide is a murder. the biggest crime a person could commit against oneself. or so everyone thought. the number of suicide deaths were slowly but surely decreasing, thanks to the risk management team that are led by ko ryeon. he understood that deaths are increasing endlessly. but why would a person take such extreme measures only to feel the will to live after a few words of encouragement? it made his blood boil.

he wanted to avoid this team at all costs, but then you came along. you were young, full of empathy and love. joong-gil knew of the newbie that joined (through a course of unexpected events) and he found you quite annoying intriguing. when he heard about a suicide victim with a very high percentage on the red light app, he went to watch. he wanted to confirm his beliefs with his own eyes.

but when he reached there, he saw you talking to the writer, named eunbi, who was on the edge of the building. you were taking cautious steps towards her, trying to talk her out of it. how pathetic, he thought. but after looking again, he wasn't sure if those were the correct words to say. he was shocked to say the least. not because the writer jumped off, but because you jumped right after. you were reaching out to her, trying to hold her. you held her so tight, preparing for impact. can a reaper die? is what you thought as you waited for impact.

however, it never came. you never felt pain. on the contrary, you were feeling the air breeze softly kiss your skin. you looked up, and there he was. the seemingly heartless reaper, holding you in his arms. you couldn't keep in the shocked expression, neither can he. you then frantically looked around for eunbi. she was laying on the ground. no...did she die? "she's not dead." you heard a deep voice say.

he was still holding you, staring at you with his dark black eyes. "what? what..happened?" "i think i should be the one asking that?" you could hear the disbelief in his voice. why am i holding this woman?.."are you out of your damn mind?" he threw you on the ground. you grunted. "why would you jump after her? were you trying to die with her ?! you're insane?!! " you were taken aback by what he said, and before you know it – tears started forming. you tried to gulp down the lump in your throat, you didn't want to break down infront of him. he wouldn't understand anyways. the other team members catch up to you, checking if you're okay. you stand up, looking at joong-gil one more time before walking away from the scene, with your head hung low.

a few days had passed. he didn't know if it was the tears you were holding in, or the look in your eyes, but jong-gil found himself thinking about you more than he'd like to admit. he wondered why the pain behind your expression is imprinted in his mind. but he had work to do. shaking thoughts about you away, he got to work. he was going to catch a well-known mafia, and he knew it was going to be a tough one. he prepared backup and left. after a few fists and punches, he found himself on the ground, in pain. he had been stabbed. the mafia was injured too. he was strong. and he knew that he should have planned this more carefully, because he's in a bit of a trouble now.

the mafia got up, took out a knife and was headed towards joong-gil. but before he could do so, a hand yanked the knife away from his hand. Joong-gil looked up, only to find you standing infront of him, wrestling the weapons off the mafia. after a few punches here and there, you knocked him out. breathing heavily, you looked at joong-gil. you immediately noticed his abdominal injury.

you find a piece of cloth and walk up to him. "what do you think you're doing here?" he hissed in pain. "i don't think you're in the right state to be asking me that, i need your cooperation to stop the bleeding." he was reluctant but he obeyed. you tied the cloth around his injury, and put his arm around your shoulders, trying to pull him up with you. he grunted in pain as he stood up. "does it hurt alot..?" you looked at him, worried. worried?? why were you worried? joong-gil thought as he looked at you. maybe this is the way you are to everyone, he shouldn't get it confused.

"are you stalking me?" he said as you furrowed your eyebrows and moved your head slightly to look at him. "if you believe you're the center of the universe, you're mistaken" you scoffed. "then why are you here? helping me?" now your mind is blank. why did you save him? you were on a mission that happened to be near where the fight occurred. before you left, you heard grunting and breaking glass. as you came closer and saw who it was, your body started acting on your own.

..."because you're an important member in jumadeong. and it wouldn't benefit me to leave you to die here." he was staring at you with an expression you can't quite decipher — it was a mix of gratitude and playfulness — he wasn't used to getting help from others, especially not from the rm team. you finally reach jumadeung, but instead of leaving joong-gil to the guards there, you took him to the infirmary. "looks like only the mighty joong-gil got hurt today" you slightly giggled at this unusual scenario.

usually joong-gil would have a comeback ready, but this time all he did was stare. stare at you. why were you so kind to him when all he does is ridicule the rm team? there must be something wrong with you...was your death so horrible it messed up your brain even in the afterlife? well...he definitely guessed the first one right. "...can you stop rubbing it in my face, it's not like i jumped willingly off the roof-" shit. shitshitshit. "i didn't mean to-" he grunted as you threw him on the medical bed, turned around and left. he didn't realize that he said the last part out loud.

people in jumadeung ridiculed you for doing "too much" to suicidal people for as long as you can remember, but why do you feel your eyes burning with tears? why did that heartless leader have such an effect on you? you couldn't understand. you kept walking, almost sprinting, to get to the place you loved the most - a hidden roof garden that only you knew about (or so you think). you always went there when you needed to take a breather, and to let your tears fall down freely. as you opened the door to the garden, your tears rushed out of your (e/c) eyes, as you were unable to hold in your sobs. you cried your heart out, knowing well no one was there to see you.

but you were wrong. standing at the door, someone was holding onto to their heart, feeling immense pain. joong-gil felt like knives were stabbing at his heart, the air rush out of his lungs. he couldn't believe what he's seeing. that he was the reason that triggered it.

after a while, you had calmed down, your sobs turning into sniffles. you now noticed the spectacular view of the city, bright lights shining under you. you collected yourself, and realized that you had spent way more time than you should here, work isn't gonna work itself. joong-gil sensed that you were about to get up, and hid before you could see him. feeling pathetic for his cowardly action, he felt his eyes burning. me? crying? he didn't know his tear ducts were working at all, after too many years working in escorting the dead.

after that incident, joong-gil decided you were better off without him looming over you all the time. however, that's not how it was for you. what he said lingered, rather, took over your mind. you couldn't fathom why you wanted his understanding, why you wanted his dark eyes to look at you like you meant something to him. you decided to pile your desk with work to give no space for your racing thoughts.

.

but to their dismay, they both couldn't stop thinking about the other, both throwing themselves at work, like they couldn't handle the life moving on around them.

.

part 1 | part 2

[saidrabbles]

now i know

warnings: mentions of suicide, self-harm

part 1 | part 2

it's been several months since your encounter with the dark haired reaper, convincing yourself that it is better that way. you frequented the hidden roof garden, seeking solace from your colleagues, stress..him.

tonight was one of those dreadful nights, you could feel it in your bones. just as you entered the rm office, phones rang the stressing alarms, indicating a high risk case. heart in your throat, you rushed the other two to make it in time. unable to rationalize his choice, joong-gil found himself going after you three, wanting to make sure you don't endanger yourself again. he didn't hate how he felt; like he was starting to embrace feelings more honestly.

standing in-front of a young brunette, too young to be standing this close to the edge of the bridge, her tears obstructing her view. "hello," you tried to start "leave me alone!! move the fuck away from here!" you can tell that her feelings are overwhelming her, unable to look around without frustration seeping through the thick misty air.

"i will leave if you take a deep breath for me, hm?" the brunette seemed to shift her focus to the railing and steady her standing. "feel the coldness of the iron rail?" you gently ask, your voice almost coming out as a whisper. you could see her fingers tighten around the iron as tears welled up in her eyes. "she's gone..." her sniffles grew louder "she was cold to the touch...lifeless...blood seeping through the tiles." she was sobbing at this point. you started taking cautious steps towards her.

"my only sister, i did not realize her sadness, pain in time...it's all my fault !!" "it's not your fault, it never will be" you got closer. alarmed, the brunette screamed "i have to do this! i have to jump! i have to go see her, she needs me!!" you stopped in your tracks. you tried regulating your breathing, the scene feeling all too familiar.

"but won't you be doing the same thing?" finally, the young teen turned to face you. "what would you know?" she scoffed, seeming determined. next thing joong-gil sees, is you holding onto the girl as she tries to pry her hand off of yours. he froze.

"suicide is the greatest crime you could commit, ending the chances for a loved one to help you before they even tried. do you know how hard it will be for your loved ones to go on living?? the pain never goes away. some days are bearable, others are so unbearable that they won't be able to breathe" you were choking out the words at this point "you've taken responsibility and carried this weight all on your own, are you confident that you won't regret this choice?" jong-gil felt knives stabbing at his heart.

with the help of your teammates, you were successful to pull her back onto the sidewalk. she cried in your arms, calling out her sister's name. feeling tears rush through your eyes, you were reminded of a similar past you can never forget.

.

as exhausting as the tears made you feel, you were hungry. you opened the door to your second home at this point, huddling snacks since you haven't eaten much since the morning. one minute you were trying to balance the food in your arms, the other was them falling altogether and you staring wide-eyed at the scene before you. there he was, in his tight-fitted suit that complimented his majestic figure. he was standing with his back to you, only to turn and look at you with those dark brown eyes...you could not decipher the look he's giving you, regret? yearning? but there was also a shine to his eyes that only seemed to grow in the dark, green setting.

.

"hey."

.

his deep, soothing voice...was he always this attractive? it must be due to detaching from your surrounding for so long that made you feel a sudden, giddy roiling in the pit of the gut. for making you feel like you want to wrap your hands around him and feel his warmth radiating through you.

.

"(y/n)?..."

.

snapping out of your thoughts that had no clear explanation to them, your face reddened as you realized that you were staring all this time. you couldn't be more thankful for the dark setting because the blush has crept from your neck to your ears and cheek.

"how did you know about this place?" you started, not liking how your voice was softer than you'd like it to be. scratching the back of his neck, he forgot to form a solid story. after all, joong-gil had seen you at your worst and he knew that would get you running as far away as you can from him "i was trying to hide from the piling papers on my table, and my wandering led me here somehow." he secretly punched the air for the nice save.

the awkwardness in the air thickened, both knowing what to say to the other. "have you eaten yet? i didn't realize how much food i'd bought until i started struggling holding them in my arms" you slightly smiled as you looked down on the pile of wrapped stuffed bread and drinks. "actually, i haven't eaten yet." he gave you a smile. he should smile more often.

and that's how you both sat down on the wooden bench, with adequate space between you as you ate in silence.

"how is your injury?" you asked him, still not really looking at him. his heart swelled. you still cared. "i'm sorry." joong-gil started as he put down the grape flavoured drink and started rubbing his hands together for warmth. "i did not mean what i said in the infirmary." "it's okay, joong-gii-" he looks at you with pleading eyes, "please" that's when you turned to him, seeing the same expression from before. you just nodded in response. he continued.

"i think you are one of the most empathetic people i've met, which was hard to grasp in the beginning. i have been in this world for so long, that i had to bury any empathy left in me. i escort elderly people who have been left on their own, veterans who fought for their countries yet ended up working harder to make a living after." he can feel your intense stare and as he turned to you, he noticed how focused you are on him, it made his heart flutter. "thus, i wasn't able to meet you eye to eye, and was trying to justify that by saying that you were weird...and...

i never understood how people seemingly gain and lose the will to live easily, but it hit me like a truck, the night on the bridge, what you said...the complex feelings engulfing your words knocked the wind out of me."

this is the most vulnerable he's ever been. unable to look at the (h/c) girl next to him, he was fiddling with a loose thread hanging from the sleeve of his white crisp shirt. you hummed, taking in all that he's said. "he was always smiling." you stared ahead, "his golden locks shined under the warm sunlight, curls bouncing around as he walked around."

you could feel the confused yet intense stare on your side, "my brother." you took in a deep, painful breath. "he was 12 when he decided that he was unlovable, worthless, wanted to rid the world of his immensely beautiful soul." you were shaking, pulling at the material of your pants to stop it when you felt a large, warm hand over yours. joong-gil's hand sent heat waves throughout your body, announcing the new yet familiar touch of another human.

you did not realize you were crying until his other hand reached gently, so gently as if your skin was made of glass, to your face as he slowly wiped away your betraying tears. you absentmindedly leaned into his hand, closing your eyes for a brief moment. "i blamed myself so much that i convinced myself that i deserved punishment." you opened your eyes to meet a softened, sad and weirdly loving pair of eyes mirroring your own (e/c) eyes. he nodded in encouragement.

"it started out by purposely missing meals, feeling the physical pain of hunger. and when that wasn't enough i," your breath hitched "i started inflicting pain on my own body. however, the pain in my heart never ceased...it felt like i had to make this useless heart of mine stop. to feel better." you realized that joong-gil was sitting much closer to you now. "my parents were devastated. my first real punishment is them finding me. my second punishment is never being able to see any one of them, ever again."

before you started crying again, you felt joong-gil pull you into him, holding you so tightly in his embrace, moving his hand in comforting circles around your back, his other hand around your waist. slowly, you put your hands around him, feeling indescribable warmth run through your veins. something about the way he held you so delicately made you melt into him, feeling a growing feeling overpowering your sadness. love. you are falling in love with the infamous reaper, devouring a side that you hoped only you would see.

you both reluctantly pulled away, still close, but just enough to look at each other. he quickly glanced at your full, plump lips before he looked into your eyes again, and he could've sworn you did the same. he slowly started closing the distance between you, giving you enough time to pull away. only you moved in too, breath hitching as your noses almost touched. he looked at you before desperately closing the distance between your lips.

your lips were like the missing pieces in a puzzle, fitting perfectly together. your tongues danced together, devouring each other. pulling away for air, he rested his forehead against yours. "i didn't know why my heart beat quicker the first time i saw you, but now i know." he looked into your soul, "i love you, (y/n). deep down, i always knew i will. i'm sorry it took me so long." breathless, you smile as you pecked his lips.

.

"i love you too, my god given solace."

.

[saidrabbles]

Hello!!! So I red your park joon gil fic and it was good please write more for the show Ik obsess with your writing 🙏🏼🥰🥰

a/n: thank you so much anon, you really made my day ♡ i hope u like it !

.

timeless love

pairing: park joong-gil x reader

warnings: blood, suicidal thoughts, violence

summary: finally waking up after 6 painful months, all seemed well. the risk management members missed you, but all they had to wait were 50 years...right? you left an impression in everyone's minds in jumadeung, including the seemingly heartless escort team leader.

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saying goodbye after working for 6 months in jumadeung was hard to say the least. the members of jumadeung, especially the risk management members, had gotten used to your presence. "we'll just have to wait for 50 more years." ryeon says out loud. "49 years and 2 months, leader." ryung-gu retorted, seemingly disappointed. "is ryung-gu actually disappointed?" ryeon teased. "ah-ehem. n-no?" the younger one hesitantly replies. ryeon smiled. she didn't expect to miss you that much either.

but what no one had expected, was for you to show up on the app. checking the red light app one day, the coffee in ryung-gu's hand slips from his hand. you were the life they had to save. "w-what...?" both members look at each other "how did this happen...?"

after digging around and asking people close to you for what happened, they discovered the tragic incident. your sister was a victim of bullying in her workplace, and one day — it went to far. a sharp object present in the wrong time, was the cause of her death.

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she was a few feet away from being in your hold. that day, you discovered what your sister was going through by accidentally reading her journal. you immediately went to her workplace, terrified that you don't make it in time. but what you didn't expect, was to see your other half lying on the ground, lifeless.

all you could see was her blood, forming a puddle around her. still in disbelief, you called 911. "there's a person hurt here, please come quickly..." you were barely able to speak "ma'am, is the person you're talking about breathing? what is their condition?" the person on the other line inquired. "just fucking come !! she's alive...she has to be !!!"

you hang up and slowly move to where she lied. cries turned into sobs, as you held her in your arms. this pain was like no other, you felt your heart being ripped out of your chest. you were going to do everything that it takes to punish them all for taking her from you.

.

when joong-gil coincidentally became aware of this, he was in complete shock. he had become fond of you during your time in jumadeung, and was worried. he didn't want you to commit the the one thing he hated the most.

it was not her fault, why would she blame herself? he couldn't understand. he couldn't wrap his head around it, he's lost touch with his "human" emotions a long time ago.

but then why is he finding ways to intervene with the risk team to be close to you?

.

seeking revenge, you started losing yourself. all you thought about was how to kill those bastards. you do everything in your power to find them. you ultimately find them. and as ironic as it is, you end up losing your life. one that you could've cared less for anyways...

you wake up to see a lifeless body, cold blood oozing out. im...gone...? you stay on the ground for god knows how long until you see a figure standing infront of you. joong-gil got there first. worried was written all over his face.

how can he be so late????

"did you..." he breathlessly tries to continue, "kill yourself?..." you laugh bitterly. "that would've been better, at least i could've gotten my revenge first." you feel weight over you as you try to balance yourself. "w-what...." joonggil was hugging you, he was crying? "thank god...." you were confused to who this man was. why's he holding you with so much...warmth?

"who...are you..?" that's when he remembered. you don't recall any of what happened in jumadeung. "im...a grim reaper." he let's go of you and stands up, feeling embarrassed. "do i...know you?" his eyes glinted in excitement. "do you know who I am..?" you can't remember...but why would you have known a reaper?

what the hell is happening to me...joong-gil was new to all of this. ever since he heard of what happened; something in him changed. his true feelings were escaping through his nonchalant facade.

.

he then took you to jumadeung, to the jade empress. he made up an excuse for showing up before the others, seemingly convincing. he wanted you to be in jumadeung, for him to be close to you - but he obviously used your skills as an excuse. the empress decided to give you a lighter position to begin with.

you were silent almost all of the time, only speaking when you needed to discuss work matters. joong-gil had been watching over you, and he felt the pain tear into his heart. you were in so much pain, yet you didn't want to be reborn. you want to punish yourself, for something that was never your fault.

he noticed how little you are eating, and decided to leave food on your table everyday. in the first few days, you were unhinged. but after that, you started eating a bit of the food, which made him feel more than happy - you're trying. he would then wake up earlier than the rest to buy coffee and breakfast and put it on your desk before you come. it's what he can do for now.

that was until you decided to wake up earlier than usual, and go to work. that's when you saw the strange yet familiar man putting coffee on your desk. "so it was you..." you partially whispered. but it caused joong-gil nearly making a coffee mess on the desk. "uhh...you're early..." he tried to look unphased, but he was visibly nervous. that's when he heard it.

the first time you've laughed in a while.

joong-gil was taken aback, and all he could do was take in your facial features as you're smiling. he sensed a nervous feeling in his stomach. he was getting butterflies. and when you looked at him, he knew — there was no going back. hes in love with you.

"thank you...uh.." you nervously fiddle with the button on your shirt. "what should i call you?" he left the coffee on the table and fully turned to your direction "you can call me yours joong-gil." "well, thank you for your kindness, joong-gil-ssi...but i don't deserve it." you try to smile. "why is that?" he pushed on. "what happened to my sister...it was my fault for not noticing when i knew her too well." he takes a few steps closer to you. "you weren't the one who hurt her, you didn't know" he assured you.

"but i can't help think of the what ifs...if i had noticed earlier. if I've seen the bruises on her..." not wanting to cry in front of him, you turn around. as you try to wipe your escaping tears, you felt two strong arms behind you wrapping themselves around you. "it pains me to see you in so much agony. i know...how it feels to reach a person when it's too late..." he held you tighter.

you wanted more of this warmth. you wanted to inhale this person's scent, to live in it. you push his arms slightly for you to turn and bring yourself closer to his body. you wrapped your arms around him, feeling your shameless heart beat loudly. joong-gil was surprised, but he held you just as tightly. as you relax into his embrace, you decide that you were going to ask about your time here.

.

after you ask the empress about your past here, she gave you the erased memories. that's when it all made sense. joong-gil wasn't clear with his feelings in your past recollection, but your feelings for him was clear. you loved his little gestures that would show he cared, how he was acting beyond his understanding, and you acknowledged him. but before anything happened between you, time was up. and you had to go back to where time existed.

and now you're back here, but you're holding a greater pain in you. you didn't know if you deserved happiness at all...not after what you failed to do. protecting your family. "your sister is in a better place right now. she's living a life she always wished for...but it pains her to see you hurting." you hear the empress say. she puts a hand on your shoulder. "...you can be reincarnated and eventually meet your sister - in another life."

you felt like the weights on your shoulder had been lifted. you smile. you were told that you can meet your sister...you should be happy...but he kept showing up in your head. "you've endured well...and you're allowed to choose your happiness." you felt shameless for wanting him...but you knew that's what your sister would've wanted as well.

you finally let your feelings for him take over.

you knock on his door, and he answers with his deep voice on the other side. you enter, feeling yourself getting nervous. as you take a look at him, you stop in your tracks. the dark vest hugging his body, defining his small waist. the black pants emphasizing his long legs. he was breathtaking. when you look at his face, your heart skips a beat. his eyes were focused on you, never wandering. his lips curled up in a small, genuine smile.

caught in a daze, your body takes over. you walk up to him, hold his chiseled face in your small hands, and kiss him. he was shocked for a few seconds, but almost immediately kisses back. your hands slide down his chest as he holds your face gently. the kiss started with subtle movements, but eventually got more intense. you only stopped to catch your breaths, still holding each other.

"i won't be able to let you go after this..." he whispers. "you won't need to...im staying." he looks at you with shocked eyes. "im not getting what you're saying-" you caressed his face. "im saying that i won't be reborn, im going to be by your side, in this timeless place."

unable to form words, he kisses you again.

[saidrabbles]

the cursed red string (1)

reuqest (by anon): can you make a imagine about reader x choi joon Wong x park Joong gil . It's like the three of them are connected with the red string like soulmates

pairing: reader x junwoong x joonggil

warnings: blood, mentions of suicide

a/n: im not sure how many parts this story will be, but it will have two endings !

it's been a calm few months in jumadeung, specifically for the risk management team as the dark cloud, also known as park joonggil, has been off their back for a while now. he would love to block your way whilst a mission to mock your team and its purpose. you sigh as you remember the incident three months ago - you had signed a reaper's responsibility contract with him, as you had to keep one of the souls he had to escort for the sake of saving a living person. "are you sure you won't regret this?" you heard him say as he passed on the paper to sign. "im pretty sure i will, but that's the only thing that will stop you right now."

as if you needed more on your plate, there was the recruitment of a naive soul - junwoong. he had his heart on his sleeve but his death is a mystery to everyone, as the director sealed his previous life. she insisted that your team take him in. as you're getting lost in your thoughts, you felt your chest tighten itself around your heart. it felt like someone was taking out what was left of your soul. you struggled to breathe, and fell to the ground. it was for a few minutes, but you felt yourself almost turn into nothing. you lay down on the cold, dusty floor as you breathe vigorously. what the hell...? you felt yourself fall into unconscious, and against your will, your body relaxed and your eyes started closing.

.

.

.

blood.

countless lifeless bodies.

sandy ground turned red.

you reluctantly look at your hands. a bloody sword in one, and the other dripping cold blood. you look up with your cold eyes and there he is. again. standing with a knife pointed at you, his eyes were crying out for you.

they were...yearning for you.

someone who isn't you, someone...you used to be.

"you killed him" a familiar voice cried out. "who are you!! what have you done with (y/n)??" he knows your name?

"but i am, i am (y/n)"

he shook his head as he trembled. "no....no! you're not (y/n), she would never do this!" why is the rest of his face...blurry? you hear a voice coming from him, but no features other than his eyes are visible to you.

"who...are you?" you choked out. but all you heard was his cries as he points the sword at himself and..."no!!" you reach out to him, only to grasp thin air. you were back to reality. "(y/n)? why are you crying? was it a nightmare?" you look to your side to see junwoong kneeling next to you, looking at you worriedly. you touch your face, and feel the tears you've shed for a man with no face.

it's been a while since you've seen this nightmare, why is it back? you weakly get up, pushing junwoong's extended hand away. "can you mind your own business? stop butting in" you don't look at him. "but..." he trails off. "if u have the time to chitchat then the reports i have asked are on my desk?" "a-ah not yet..." you sigh as you leave the shabby, cramped office. as the least favorite team in jumadeung, you sure have it rough.

as you were heading out of the main entrance, you make a sharp turn and walk back in the direction of the director's office. jong-gil, coincidentally witnessing your weird act, was curious.

you breathe in as you knock on the door. you hear her replying and you enter. "what brings you here at this time?" she's signing papers, the usual. "im sorry to disturb your work, i just...." you look at her "i've started getting those nightmares again." she stops writing and looks up. "now i can see his eyes...but nothing else." you hear her sigh "is that so..." you nodded "his eyes were in despair yet they had love for someone that was me...but isn't at the same time"

you feel yourself getting emotional. "they've all gathered in one place...." you hear her whisper. "when you first came here, you begged me to lock your past life's memories. your scars were so deep that one reborn wasn't enough for you to heal" she looks at you, her eyes searching yours. "it might be inevitable, your memories coming back. however, the people in your dream might have the same faces as some of the reapers here, but they aren't the same people." you were even more confused. their faces would be familiar...? "what do you mean-" she waves her hand signaling for you to leave. "im busy now, another time."

you leave, more befuddled and worried than at ease. which is why you fail to see the tall figure standing infront of you. "what the-" you look up to see a confused jong-gil. confused?? you mumble a sorry and continue walking until you heard him speak. "you haven't forgotten the contract you've signed, right?" you stop and turn slightly enough to acknowledge him, still not looking at him. "how would you want me to fulfill that?" "you know when the time will come." what is with everyone riddling today?? you finally look up to meet his eyes, that were already searching yours. you felt your heart tighten. you nod your head and turn back to leave as quickly as you can.

you threw yourself on the soft bed, sighing in relief. you're finally done with the day. throwing the covers over your body, you thought about today's incidents. so many questions yet no answers. why did i want her to lock my memories...what type of person was i in the past..? dwelling over the director's words, you decide to close your eyes for the second time today. unaware of what's ahead, you focus on your curiosity.

part 1 I part 2 I part 3

[saidrabbles]

Hello! I was wondering, could you do a Park Joong Gil scenario? He and reader are already in a well established relationship and he get jealous whenever someone tries to flirt with reader and reader loves teasing him for that? Hope you have a good day/night!

a little jealous, aren't you?

warnings: none

.

for the very first time in a while, you were catching up with work and resting well. your office was right next to your beloved boyfriend, whom you're smitten with. you get to see each other everyday, and most often than not, you would end up working together.

little did you know, it was a compensation for what's to come.

a new rookie had joined the escort team. and you were assigned to keep him in check. now this wouldn't be a problem, it'll take a few days to get adjusted but then he'd do well...right?

wrong.

he was a gullible, curious being. he had so many questions for every little thing you say, it left you beyond exhausted. "junwoong, if you ask one more question, i might just cut your tongue off." he looked at you with his puppy-like eyes, and pouted. "i just like hearing your voice when you talk..."

you ignored what he said, as you knew he was just trying to get to you. he was quite a flirt, you could see that, but you didn't know he'd do it often.

in the hallway near your office, joong-gil stood. he was on his way to give you a few reports for you to fill in. he witnessed this interaction, and feels himself scratching the back of his head. shaking off the jealousy rising in him, he continues walking up towards you.

"(y/n)" he called you sternly. "oh, hi joong." you smiled at him, and he felt himself relax a bit. junwoong, standing there with his eyes glued on joong-gil, coughed. "noona, who's this?" "ah, this is park joong-gil, leader of the escort team."

junwoong greets the older male, but joong-gil was disappointed. you didn't mention that he was yours, or that you were in a relationship. what if junwoong tries to get with you? you're a dream in his eyes - your body was a work of art. and your smile, the brightest he's ever seen.

"hey, joong. i've got to go now. i've got a soul to collect and i was told the newbie had to follow suit. he has a lot to learn yet." you sigh. "why are you sighing, is it that annoying to be with me?" junwoong pouted. you laughed at his adorable expression, he can be quite cute sometimes.

joong-gil watched you as you leave together, pissed. his eyes were burning holes in the back of his head. he barely held himself back from beating him up, that sly brat.

but he let this one go, he wouldn't get to brave with his love, would he?

but he couldn't help himself, it occupied all of his thoughts. he started calling you more often to check up on you, and to see if junwoong was with you. and more times than not, he would be there. it drove him crazy. while you, on the other hand, didn't have the slightest idea of what was happening.

.

you were walking back to your office, that was located right next to joong-gil's. it was another long day, and you were exhausted. you entered the classy office, turning on the small chandelier for light. what you didn't expect though, was to find an angry figure waiting for you.

"you just came back from work?" you were startled. "baby, you scared me. why did you leave the lights off?" you looked at him sitting in your chair. you sensed tension in the air, but you were too tired to address it. he coughs "you seem to be enjoying your work now." you stared at him, trying to decipher his words. he looker...sullen?

"alot is going on at work, but yeah, you could say i got used to the job." you smiled at him. you put the piled up papers on your desk, and went to peck his lips. as you try to move away, he pulls you back into a deeper kiss.

letting go for air, he holds you from your waist. "i miss you...you've been spending alot of time with that overly joyous boy." it all clicks. the reason why he's been so attached to you, calling every other day - was because he was jealous.

"hmm...my love," you held his face in your small hands "are you perhaps...jealous?" you teased. you tried to hold in your laugh, but one look at his dumbfounded expression and you exploded. you were laughing so much your face hurt. "i-i'm not !! don't get any ideas !!" he tries to hide his reddened ears. "i can't believe the great joong-gil is jealous" you said as your laugh slowly died down, leaving a satisfied smirk on your face.

"don't worry, no one will ever come close to my love for you. i've missed you too" you smiled, genuinely happy. he continued denying his jealousy for the rest of the night.

.

you were next to junwoong, waiting for the other member to give you important papers for your escort. just then, joong-gil shows up. reading the papers he has in his hands, he doesnt see you yet. wanting to tease him one last time, you turn to junwoong.

"hey ! where's that video you wanted to show me last time?" you move inches closer to him, enough to look close. "oh the gym video?" he pulls out his phone, and plays the video. the cracked phone screen made it hard for you to focus, but you saw it was junwoong lifting weights.

"wahh those weights look heavy !" you say a bit too loud. from the corner of your eye, you see joong-gil sharply turn to where you were. his eyes had a fire in them, his jealousy gnawing at you. you loved his reactions and how his jealousy was only rising. "look at those muscles-" you were suddenly being pulled by your arm in the direction of your office.

"h-hey calm down-" as soon as you entered the office, your body was pushed against the wall. "and? what are you trying to do?" he breathes. "joong calm down-" his sculpted face comes closer to you, his dark eyes gazing at yours. "(y/n), don't test my patience. i've held myself long enough." he doesn't let you speak as he captures your lips in his hungrily.

you were flustered, your heart was almost leaping out of your chest. you try to pull back because you desperately needed air. he allows you for a few seconds before kissing you again. after running out of breathe, again, he puts his forehead on yours. "you're so cute when you're jealous" you breathe out a small laugh.

"you're enjoying this aren't you," he opens his eyes to look at you. "kinda?" you admit. you both start laughing. "i don't love anyone like i love you." you confess. he looks at you, his heart beating louder than before. "everytime i see you, i fall in love all over again." unable to express his fluttering heart, he pulls you in for an embrace. "i love you more than you'll ever know." he whispers.

.

you walk back to where junwoong was, holding hands. "noona !! i've been waiting for soo long" he whined. "yeah yeah im sorry" he notices your intertwined hands. "why are you holding hands?" he pouts. "gosh you're so straightforward" you laugh. joong-gil puts his arm around you, pulling you closer to him. "she's mine. so get your act together, kid" he glares at junwoong.

"wahh you're scary." he then laughs. "choi junwoong." you sternly call him. "fineee, i'll try my best" you look at joong-gil's satisfied expression and start laughing. soon enough, both males start arguing again.

.

a/n: it's been a while ! im back with another joong-gil fic eheh, i hope you like it anon <3

[saidrabbles]

hold you

pairing: lim ryunggu x reader

warnings: mentions of child abuse, alcoholic

summary: ryung-gu, who thought he couldn't love anyone other than his mother, started to fall for you. new to this feeling, he doesn't know what to do. he feels even worse when he sees you in pain, but can't get close to you.

ryung-gu, would only express emotions when it comes to his mother. their fates being severed, it pains him more than anything to know that they will never reunite, not in any lifetime. his team leader, ryeon, was quite like him. they both don't intervene in each other's business, but are there for each other. that was until you came along. you were a curious little being. having newly joined the risk management team, you wanted to get to know them both. you were known in jumadeung for being a good listener and an empathetic.

at first he was put off by you, because he felt the barrier he's built crumble bit by bit, and he was unable to stop it. your warmth spread through him like a tight embrace, and he couldn't help but soften up to you. well, internally he has. he's still the nitpicking colleague to you. he enjoyed getting you frustrated and always finding comebacks to his remarks. deep down, he wondered what your story was. he knew life isn't fair to anyone, and he wanted to know your story and how you came to be a reaper.

today was just like any other day in the rm office. you had a case to handle, a life to save. except this time it was different for you. kim hara, 15 years old. a teenager facing constant physical and emotional abuse at home. you froze as mr. lim's explains the situation. flashbacks hit you, but you shake your head in attempt to shake the memories away. ryeon and ryung-gu look at you, puzzled at your action. "a-ah...i couldn't sleep well last night, so i'm trying to shake the sleep away" you laugh. "well today's case is sensitive, and needs to be handled with care. kids these days are quick to action, so we must hurry" ryeon states as she gathers her things. ryung-gu looks at you for a while longer, but then also gets ready to leave.

just as you reach the doorstep of the house, you hear screams and beatings on the other side. your clench your fists, your chest tightening. you knew this day would come. but you didn't know it would be this soon. tears started to form in your eyes, but you didn't let them fall. "hey...are you..okay?" you look at the owner of the voice. it was ryung-gu. and he was looking at you worried...?? "i'm fine" you force a smile. just as you walk to ring the bell, a hand holds your arm. "you don't look fine. it's better if you tell us what's wrong now, so that we know how to handle the situation" he insists. you look at the both of them, you're not ready to talk about it yet. and why should you ?? "i think you've forgotten, mr. lim, but you were the ones to insist on privacy, you can't take that back now." you shake your arm away from his grip, and ring the bell.

he was worried. he's never seen you this way. but he concluded that he will leave it until after they finish. a woman slightly opens the door, but opens it big enough for you to see the menace in her eyes. "who are you?" she spoke drunkenly. you could smell her stinky breath miles away. "we're here for the bathroom fix." you replied dryly. "and it requires three dull looking people??" that's it. she gave you the chance to punch her- but you held back. "we're the only ones available and if we leave now you may not get help until three months later. "yes yes...just be quick. i've got business to take care of." "like beating your child to death?" you mumbled under your breath.

as you entered the house, you were all scanning the house for the sight of the injured teen. but she was nowhere to be found. "we've been told it was your daughter who accidentally broke the pipe connecting to the sink...but the house seems to empty" ryeon tries to provoke her. "I don't remember saying all of this? are you stalking me?" she questioned as she stumbled on the carpet. "you're drunk right now, so you probably can't remember" ryeon gave you a look that you immediately understood. she was distracting her. taking the hint, you slowly moved into the bedrooms to look for hara. ryung-gu soon followed after. opening the closet, you see her holding her knees close to her, visibly shaking. you felt your heart being torn.

she looked up, fear visible in her eyes. "hey, it's okay. im here to help you." you gently speak to her. "i know you're beyond exhausted, and every single part of your body hurts, but can you stand one more time so that we leave this scary place?" you extended your hands to her. she hesitated. she stared at your hand for so long, and you knew what was going on in her head. how could you not? you know how it feels too well...just as she finally gathered the strength to hold your hand, an angry figure busted through the bedroom door. "what in the hell do you think you're doing??!! she's my child. she's mine. she will never go anywhere, because she belongs with me, and i will die without her" the drunken beast was screaming.

ryung-gu looked at you as you both realized that ryeon is not next to her, your eyes conveying visible worry. "ryung-gu, you have to check up on ryeon !! you never know what this crazy woman has done!" you frantically told him "are you crazy?? and leave you alone with this monster?? not happening!" he screamed back. "lim ryung-gu." he froze. you only called him by his full name when it's serious. he looked at you. "go. i've got this. i can handle this." you spoke with all the courage you have tried to gather in you. he heaved a loud sigh, he knew he couldn't change your mind now. he should make it quick.

in a blink of an eye, he was gone. and you were left alone in that room, with your greatest pain and fear...your mother.

a/n: this will be a 2 part series, and this was part 1. all the characters are not mine, they are from the ongoing k-drama: tomorrow.

part 1 | part 2

[saidrabbles]

Hello! I just want to say that your Park Joong-Gil fics are AMAZINGG!! ❤️❤️. I hope you continue writing more fics on him! 😃😃

I have a request, could you do Park Joong-Gil fluff imagine where he and reader have a lot of romantic attraction between each other and reader is like extremely flirty and likes to tease him all the time...and one day the feelings just explode and they end up confessing.

hiiiiii anon !!! when i first read your comment on my work i was so happy, it truly means alot to me; thank you !! im sorry it took me so long to finish your lovely request; i hope you like it !! <3

fiery heart

you groan as you stretch your strained arms above your head, feeling exhausted. it was another long day, sitting at your office desk, reading paper after paper. you were responsible for proofreading papers for mistakes before they get published.

as you lower your arms, you notice a pair of sharp yet soft eyes stare at you from a distance. it was your manager, park joong-gil. he was responsible for your team, that is known in almost all of jumadeung. mostly because everyone gushes over his physique and sharp yet gentle features, but also because you're one of the highly skilled teams in the whole company.

you hold his eye contact, and subtly smirk. but he sees it. and it gets him fired up on the inside. he can't deny the attraction he feels towards you - you've been driving him crazy. being the careful guy all his life, he doesn't quite know what to do with his feelings.

he's not sure if you feel the same; but from the flirty gestures and words you've been throwing at him these days, he feels like you're feeling the same way as well. but then again, he's noticed you're naturally the flirty type. from the way you joke w others, hitting their arms playfully when you're laughing too hard; to when you hide your head behind your teammates when you're embarrassed.

you're driving him insane. and without his permission, you've become the air he breathes. what he wasn't aware of was that you've been trying to show your interest in him for a long while now - but hes still oblivious...or is he acting like it?

you get up from your seat, never breaking eye contact with your said crush love, as you walk up to his desk. the desks arrangement is pretty cozy, all are facing one another, with the managers desk set at the end, in the middle of all the other four. you put the papers on his desk, giving him a gentle smile.

'these are all the submissions for today's publishing queue.' he feels his heartbeat quicken as he hears your voice. he pretends to go through them, his mind unable to concentrate. 'good work. i like the way these have been edited.' 'well, if you like this, then you'll like me as well.' your lips slipped before your mind could process what you've said.

you both freeze, feeling your thoughts run through your mind. you clear your throat, and slowly retreat back into your desk chair.

you've definitely gone crazy. that's the only explanation for your fearless confession. you wanted to disappear right then and there.

great...now he thinks I'm self-obsessed.

you unconsciously started avoiding him for the rest of the day, your embarrassing conversation running around your head. you just wanted the day to end so that you can run away from him.

after seemingly long hours, your work for the day has finally ended. you try pack your things as quickly as you can without anyone noticing, but he noticed. because while you were avoiding him, he didn't take his off of you. your vague confession lingered on his mind, and he didn't want you to go home before he asked you about it.

you finally left the office, feeling like you can breathe again. before you reach the elevator button, you felt a large hand hold yours. you turn to see the one and only person you've been trying to avoid all day. 'can i talk to you?' he looks at you nervously. not feeling ready for his confrontation, you refuse. his hold on you tightens, not letting you go. 'please don't run away from me.' he says as you feel your chest tightens.

you let out a shaky breath as you reluctantly agree. he takes you to an empty room, as he readies his heart. even if you didn't feel the same, he has to tell you before it's too late. "i think...i like you. no," he shakes his head "i know that i love you" he sits on the black leathered chair, trying to get ready for what's coming. "i know that you probably don't feel the same, that you're like that with everyone. but unlike everyone, my heart couldn't help but beat a little faster around you." he let's out a deep sigh.

you blink a few times, trying to wrap your head around what he just said. you point at him, then slowly point at yourself, mouthing a "you? me?" forgetting his nerves, he lets out a small laugh. you can't help but feel your heart melting at his nervous smile and the way he's looking at his hands, like he's preparing himself for something. did he think you were going to reject him?

'you know, the only reason i learned how to flirt is to woo you. you've always had your walls high up, leaving no gaps for me to get to your heart.' he froze. he feels his chest tighten, like he's been holding in too much, alot more than his heart could handle. 'i just never knew how to ask you out. a tiny voice in my head kept telling me how you'll never see me that way.' he looks at his large hands, a vein popping up from the upper part of his hand.

you walk closer to him, and crouch down to look at him closely. 'just say the word and im yours, joong-gil.' he could've sweared his heart jumped out of his chest, ran laps around the tiny room, and went back into his chest. 'i love you.' he holds your face in his hands, bringing it dangerously close to him. 'i love you, (y/n). im so insanely in love with everything that you are'

you both feel your hearts form a symphony from their loud sounds, as he closes in the space between the two of you. he keeps pulling you closer, afraid to let go, afraid that this is all a dream. you are barely able to pull back, feeling his firm hold on you. "i love you, joong-gil" you breathe out. he caresses your soft cheeks with his thumb so gently, you feel like you're finally home. "will you be mine, (y/n)?"

you've only heard him say that to you in your dreams, so for him to say it right here and now felt so surreal to you. "i already am yours" as you lean into him to be engulfed in the warmest hug you've ever felt. you don't know how long you stayed like that, because by the time you left the building, the night sky was shining over you.

[saidrabbles]

the cursed red string (2)

you were standing infront of a lifeless body, laying in a pool of blood. father...tears were falling uncontrollably. you were sobbing. holding his hand, you notice a paper crumpled in his fist. you take it out, as gentle as you can, and read it.

"blood was the only thing to fulfill our revenge. he was, and will forever be, a traitor."

shaking, you scrumpled the paper in your fist. you knew who they were. you knew where they lived. there was a fire in you, slowly forming. heading out with your father's sword, a hand stops you. someone was hugging you. "please...my love...don't do this" it was him. "i don't want their filthy blood on your hands" he cried out. "let me go." he held you tighter. "and if i don't ?"

he tried to take the sword out of your hands, but you just pushed him away. "don't you see? don't you see him, lying lifelessly surrounded by cold blood??" you were shaking. "his blood on my hands hadnt dried yet..." you tried to choke out words, but failed. your shocked body fell to the ground, holding your tightening chest as you cried.

he knelt down, holding you as he caressed the small of your back. after a while, your cries stopped, and your eyes darkened. "i won't ever stop until i kill each and every one of them. let me go, please." you look up at him, and you see him. you see his face. dark eyes that glistened under the sun. his sharp features all too clear. you sit up in your bed, wide-eyed. joong-gil...

walking into jumadeung, there was not a single person who wasn't staring at you with saucer eyes. how could they not? your dark circles were screaming for everyone to look at. you were too busy avoiding the prying eyes to notice a puppy-like junwoong walking beside you, also staring at you.

"what's up with your face, never knew someone could look so dead" you stop in your tracks. that voice... you look at the owner of the voice. joong-gil. you shift your gaze but your body has a mind of its own.

you found yourself searching for his eyes, to find them set on you. he was looking for yours, too.

why do you feel overwhelming guilt everytime you look at him? why does he make your heart ache? when you try to look away again, that's when you become aware of the bright red on his hand - the red string. how can you...see it? but you weren't the only one to see it - junwoong had seen it as well.

"(y/n) works really hard for our team, y'know. so stop looking down on it !" junwoong cut off the stare contest. "and your job is to follow her like a lost puppy?" the tsundere man said through gritted teeth. "im just a caring fellow team member, that's all..." junwoong was pouting. Joong-gil suddenly reached over, and patted junwoongs head - which left your mouth agape.

"ah-huh..?" junwoong was dumbfounded. he was looking at the taller figure, and felt this familiar feeling - a warming, assuring presence. it felt like he was thanking him. calling out the fierce elite's name was enough to pull in his hand, take a step back, and cough vigorously.

what the hell just happened?

"did you just..." junwoong trailed off as he looked at him. suddenly, laughter echoed in jumadeung. the park joong-gil was flustered, his ears were actually red. "hey ! your ears-" joong-gil put his large hand over the younger while he was laughing. witnessing this scene, there was a familiar feeling - home. you felt warm and giddy on the inside, like you've seen this countless of times before.

you were smiling, this was the first time you've found junwoong rather endearing. when you turn to the worked up leader, your heart fluttered. he had his gaze on you. it was almost like he was pleading with his eyes. they were begging you to remember. what the hell...

not being to hold it in any longer, you burst into the sacred flower filled chamber. and there she was, calmly seated with a delicate cup of tea in her hand. "where are your manners, little one." she stated calmly. "i need to know what happened. i need to know my past." you were trembling. "he's waiting for me to remember...i know joong-gil is involved in my past." you look at her, your eyes begging.

"i told you...they can have the same face but they're not the same-" "then why is my heart telling me otherwise?? why does it gnaw at me when im face to face with him? why can i see his red string...!" you choked out the last bit as you were crying. she sighed. "are you not afraid? are you sure...that you can handle it..?" she treaded lightly. she knew that there was no coming back now. you had to know, he had been waiting for too long..." i feel...like the truth will break me. but i need to know, for his sake at least." you say confidently.

the heaven ruler stood up, and walked towards you. "i pray that you can handle the truth" and puts her hand over your eyes.

.

you lost all control over yourself, you start seeing nothing but your sword. it was moving on its own, killing everyone in its way. you were blinded by the hatred and madness running through your veins.

.

.

.

you hear a grunt.

a voice you're familiar with.

huh? what is this? you open your eyes for what felt like the first time. joong-gil....?...what are you doing here?

when you try to move your hand, thats when you feel it. you look down and see the knife you've mercilessly plunged into him.

you gasp in horror, taking a step back. "j-joong no...!!" blood was furiously seeping out. he falls to the ground, and you fall on your knees.

you crawl to him, barely being able to hold yourself steady. "j-joong-gil, I..." you held him towards you, slightly lifting him up. "w-what have I done, l-love p-please..." unable to form words, you caressed his cheek. "stay with me" you whispered. with all the strength left in him, he slowly lifted up his hand to touch your tear stained face. "please, stop this...i don't want you to ruin yourself anymore..." he whispered. "why are you worried about me...you- look at yourself now !! how can you still care about me after all of this..." he pushed himself to smile. "i always will, my love. this is not your fault...the world is at fault."

and he closes his eyes, for the last time. the last time his loving black eyes will ever lay itself upon yours.

.

.

you open your eyes, tear-stained. i killed him...i killed the love of my life...."(y/n).." you turn away.

you run.

you run towards the person that you should have never forgotten, the person that loved you even when you were the reason he left the world too early.

you open his door, rushing in. and there he was. standing with his back to you. he turned, and there you were. the person he once, and still loved. he takes one look at you to know who you are. to know that your memories are back. to see the guilt and regret in your eyes.

"(y/n)." he puts down the report he's holding. "why didn't you tell me? how could you pretend like i wasn't the reason you're here?" you couldn't hold his eyes with yours anymore, so you look down. how could you look at him straight in the eyes? you didn't have the right. "(y/n)...look at me" your gaze was fixed on the seamless marble floor. he starts taking cautious steps towards you, "i was waiting for you.."

"waiting..? you should've reminded me, you should've been hating me for daring to forget. for even having the right to forget." the pain in your chest became unbearable, and you couldn't breathe. you fell to your knees, trying to breathe. he rushed towards you "(y/n) ! are you okay ??" he touched you and you flinched back. "don't...touch me...don't look at me with those eyes !!" you choked out. he stayed there, feeling helpless. but he didn't want to stand back any longer, he didn't want to let you go again.

he came closer to you, held your face with both of his hands. "(y/n) focus on your breathing. look at me, and focus." given the situation, you obeyed. slowly, air rushed through your lunges to fill the need of air. after taking in a few more long breaths, you become aware of the situation you're in. his face inches away, eyes fixed on you. you quickly tried to pull back, only to be held in place. he was holding your face with both his hands, not letting you pull back.

"park joong-gil, please...don't make this harder than it already is...im so-im so sorry..." you looked at every part of his face except his eyes. "hey now...(y/n), i...i became a reaper for this very reason. i knew that you wouldn't forgive yourself, and that...you would never be able to meet me." you shamelessly looked at him again. "the regret that formed a deep scar, wasn't healed easily and i...don't want you to go into endless regret again."

he caressed your skin ever so gently, so carefully. "i can't believe that i finally have you in my arms, and i can't let you go." your heart longed for this man, you felt shameless for wanting him in your life again. "if you want me to forgive you then stay with me. give me all the love you didn't back then. i want you with me." you put your arms around his neck, bringing yourself closer to him. the scent you once knew, it's still there. you held him tighter, and kept apologizing. "i'm sorry...for wanting you. for being so shameless. for not being able to let you go."

he put his arms around your waist, and his face on your shoulder. he held you firmly yet gently, he had waited for this day for decades.

and he wasn't going to let you go. not now, not ever.

part 1 I part 2 I part 3 I bonus

a/n: this was kinda long, but i hope you like it ♡