#youcannevergoback

[wonderlusting-wanderluster]

[brenda-irl]

Homecoming

I need to come home more often. At least make more of an effort to stay in touch with people. I have missed so much and I feel so guilty for trying to forget everybody. It's easy to forget the good in people when you're so far away, with a whole new life, new friends, new experiences. But I spent a large part of my life in this town, like it or not, I have a history here with people I care about, or at least cared about at one point. It doesn't completely go away.

I don't want to wind up like so many who stayed, but I don't want to come back in ten years and be a complete stranger to people who were there for some distinct moments of adolescence.

I say I don't care and that it doesn't matter to me, but hearing all these stories of what is going on with old school mates, I feel for them, and I feel like an outsider for not knowing things until months after the fact. On some level, I will always care what happens to my old friends and acquaintances, even if it's just to revel in the news that some are getting their karmic comeuppance. I especially don't like hearing that some people who were so close to me (and are no longer as close for no better reason than both parties drifting and being too lazy to pick up a phone) are going through such difficult times and I'm not there to at the very least lend an ear; it breaks my heart.

New goal: stay more in touch with the past, while continuing on my path for the future.

[dirtyhobbitconfessions-blog]

Confession # 320