Where Boris refuses to believe that his feelings are requited with Yuriy. It drives Sergei and Ivan insane, because he likes you, you idiot. You’re the only one he lets touch him.
And Boris just shrugs it off, and is like “You two are just reading into it too much. Yuriy doesn’t like me. I’m lucky he puts up with me.”
And its all Boris’ POV, of Yuriy just doing all these things that prove his feelings are requited, and that he also is in love. Things that all seem out of character for him.Yuriy does all these little things for Boris, that he would rather die than do for anyone else. Things everyone else would have them thinking, yeah he likes me. BUT DENSE. All these things, but Yuriy saying outright that he likes Boris.
YURIY EVEN KISSES HIM. But Boris is infuriatingly dense, and Sergei swears that Boris is giving him grey hairs. “Oh Yura is just taking pity on me and being nice. He would NEVER like me back like that. I’ll just take what i can get.”
And Yuriy is so stubborn because he doesn't want to voice his feelings, he just wants Boris to WAKE UP and realize it, without him having to admit it. Since you know, Yuriy has kissed him, has shoved his tongue down Boris’ throat.
Yuriy also has the whole “He is so big and so dumb, and one day, I’m gonna top him.” idea and he def does eventually. He needs to think of something funny, otherwise he is fit to go feral over Boris.
Eventually Yuriy grows so frustrated with how obtuse Boris is, that he does confess, it’s heated. It’s intense and its so unlike Yuriy how all these emotions flow out of him. Anger, yes. Cruelty, yes. But these feelings? Unheard of.
AND EVEN THEN BORIS LAUGHS AND IS LIKE STOP BEING SO NICE LOL.
Which leads to Yuriy now becoming agitated and angry, because Boris, are you fing stupid?(He may or may not tackle Boris to the ground or the bed or sOMETHING, arms pinning Boris’ to his sides, legs straddling Boris. (And oh, boris doesnt want to admit it but this is doing something for him.), and yuriy snarling, “If you dont like me back just tell me instead. BUt dont laugh at me, when I actually tell you how i am feeling.)
And now it clicks for Boris. And Boris is just overly thrilled, while he was pinned down a minute ago, (Yuriy is deceptively strong), this joy has him springing forward and embracing the redhead. (Who is startled [THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED])
So I should have planned this out for my other story because it would have been way more interesting. But I’m going for softness and fluff. So probably good this didn’t get thought of back in September last year. Because Yuriy in my fic didn't need this on top of everything
But here it is. It’s a slow burn, if that's not obvious by how RIDICULOUSLY long this whole thought is. Because I do not know how to be casual. Also if something like this exists EVEN in the slightest, help me OUT.
Boris and Yuriy are both in love with one another. Everyone with eyes can see Boris is in love with Yuriy. Head over heels. Heart eyes. Would kill for the redhead.
Those who know Yuriy well enough (Borg and Kai) know that he loves Boris. Maybe he can’t articulate it. Maybe it makes him feel funny admitting it. Maybe he thinks it’s embarrassing broadcasting his feelings.
It’s 100% mutual. Right? Perfect.
Butt not in this plot. Yuriy is fine with what they have. Doesn’t want to throw off the status quo they have of being Friends+ (the plus being: kissing, cuddling, sleeping together. Not orgasms tho bc they never got that far). Yuriy is comfortable. He has Boris. He has his family and everyone is happy!
Except for Boris. Who craves more. He wants that silly little title of /boyfriend/. Wants to hold the redhead’s hand in public. To hold him. To express more of his love out of behind the closed doors of Yuriy’s bedroom. Boris is so patient and understanding that Yuriy needs time. But at this point it’s been five years of this cat and mouse game and they’re in their mid twenties. And Boris is human. He is greedy. He wants things.
And things unravel from here. It always starts a fight when Boris brings up anything related to wanting more. Consolidating space, PDA, boyfriends. And Boris is tired at this point. It’s been five fucking years of waiting. This gets heated. Yelling and screaming. Snarling. And if they both didn’t have extensive therapy, hands would have been thrown.
And it ends with Boris giving Yuriy an ultimatum, they either progress to a new level in their relationship or what they have is done. They’ll still be friends. But for Boris’ sake he’s stepping back.
And Yuiry chooses the latter. What he doesn’t realize is how serious Boris was.
He moves out the next week, half out of spite, half because he thinks it will make him feel better. Sergei and Ivan know, but Boris doesn’t tell Yuriy. So yuriy comes home one day to a silent house with shifty eyes when they all sit down for dinner. No one says anything about Boris’ seat being empty or the lack of a place setting. So yuriy just thinks he’s out for the night, and since they’re on bad terms just wasn’t told. But that night he gets a better look around the house and notices some of Boris’ things missing but he tries to ignore it. Then the next morning Boris still isn’t there. Yuriy looks around at the other guys at the table eating breakfast. A plate is still missing from Boris’ spot.
“Boris didn’t come home last night?” He asks
The two share a look. And Sergei goes “oh fuck, did he not tell him.” He looks to Ivan.
“Trust that asshole to let us break the news.”
The news? Yuriy’s eyebrows almost reach his hairline.
“Boris moved out yesterday.”
And Yuriy is too calm as he goes Oh, and finishes eating his food.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
And yuriy has a breakdown. He calls off of work and tears apart his room. He barely realizes why. Boris warned him. Boris gave him a choice. This is what he wanted. This is what he picked.
-
And then it gets worse.
Just a lot of sad boys. And then Boris enjoying life. And sad Yuriy who just reached a breaking point and doesn't care anymore. He lets himself cry. Lets himself feel things, because if he doesnt its going to explode out of him. He feels better after a cry. Yuriy doesnt understand how his heart can hurt like this. He wishes he could just claw it out of his chest. It hurts so fucking bad.
-
Boris finds an apartment astonishingly quick. He gets himself situated and tells Sergei and Ivan he’s leaving. it hurts saying goodbye. But he needs this. Needs the space. Needs to get far away from Yuriy and figure out his wants and his needs and find someone who will give them to him. Not someone who’s willing to stay stagnant forever.
And that whole post moving out Boris, is him just using alcohol and sex to cope. He’s a virgin prior to this, but lordy, does alcohol calm his nerves. Havnet figured out how Boris and Kai end up being friendly enough prior to this, or if they become friends because of this. Boris moves out because he knows its going to hurt Yuriy, he wants it to. He isnt sure if its comparable to how he’s been feeling, but he hopes it is, and hopes its worse (yuriy would tell you its worse)
It pains him to have to hit up Hiwatari, but it means getting into clubs easier and knowing someone there. It’s fun to let loose and dance with pretty girls and Fit Guys. His hands on slim hips, and strong arms on his hips grinding against him. He feels wanted. It's refreshing.
Hiwatari isn’t that bad either, Boris realizes. He pays for their table and the drinks, and always helps him home when he’s had too much to drink. Tell him who to avoid and who’s clean, whos a good fuck and who is awful in bed. Who will try and trap him with a kid. All good friend things.
Boris ends up dancing with him one night, and between the lights, music and alcohol haze forgets who’s grinding their ass on his cock and considers taking him home that night. (He quickly remembers it’s Kai fucking Hiwatari, his has his hands on and discards that idea.
Boris enjoys this month of bliss, forgetting Yuriy and living a life that’s normal for a 25 year old. He barely thinks of the redhead, except when he’s sober, and for that month he’s rarely sober except when he’s busy at work.
He sees Sergei and Ivan when he knows Yuriy is busy, (who scold him for not even saying goodbye to Yuriy or telling him he was moving out and how fucked up it was having them tell him.). He tried to ignore how they tell him that Yuriy is struggling since he’s been gone. He’s not sleeping or eating. And not taking care of himself.
And Boris pushes down the feelings that rise up his stomach to the back of his throat. And make him feel sick. Tried to ignore that what he’s doing is hurting Yuriy, the one he claimed he loved and wanted more with.
He puts up a tough front in front of the others, he’s not sure how convincing it is. Sergei seems to buy it. Ivan not so much, when he says “well this is what Ivanov wanted. He didn’t want me so I left”
“You didn’t have to leave though. You could have stayed” Sergei says
“Do you have any idea how much it hurt me being in the house with him? I’m finally doing better. It’s not my problem that he’s suffering the consequences of his actions. You can’t ask me to hurt myself so he stops.” And he excuses himself.
He dials up Hiwatari and tells him he needs to go out tonight and doesn’t want to be stopped unless they’re taking him away in an ambulance for alcohol poisoning.
“It can be arranged. That bad huh? You see him again?”
“Bad yes. Saw Sergei and Ivan.”
“Be ready in an hour. I’ll pick you up.”
That night they both take someone home to Kai’s house, if you wanna call it that. Boris wakes up the next morning as the girl is pulling on her fishnets and boots. He finally gets a good look at her. Shes a tiny alt/emo girl with brightly dyed hair and more piercings than him. She flashes him a smile and thanks him for the good time, and that she hopes to see him at the club again.
-
And they meet up several more times and start dating. Boris warning her that this is his first relationship and he’s trying and if he does something wrong it’s not on purpose it’s just all new. And she reassured him that he’s doing a great job and kisses him. She holds his hand. She cuddles with him. She’s soft with him and affectionate in ways he never knew he wanted.
And it’s nice. It feels like something more than friends. Feels like what he’s always wanted. It’s so easy to fall into a groove of seeing her after he gets off from work. To spending nights at each other’s apartments. She insists it’s too soon to move in together. And he’s okay with that since they still sleep together almost every night. They go out clubbing together, dancing exclusively with one another. It’s lewd and he loves how he can openly express his feelings for her.
-
Until one day, there’s a soft knock on his apartment door. The girlfriend answers, and Boris can barely hear the exchange, until she comes skipping back into the living room that there’s somewhere at the door for him. And that itsa guy with redhair looking for him.
Yuriy looks meek and shy, shuffling in his doorway. He can barely make eye contact with Boris. He looks awful, too skinny, and tired, dark bags under his eyes.
“Hey. You look good.” Yuriy comments, shifting his weight from foot to foot.
“You look awful.” Boris replies. “Are you eating right? Sleeping?”
“I’m fine.” Yuriy insists, through a tight forced smile.
And they talk and its so awkward and forced. The girlfriend comes bouncing back over kisses Boris on the cheek, saying she’ll be back after work, offering Yuriy a smile and saying its nice to meet him.
Yuriy’s face falls and he answers back, “I- ugh didn’t realize that you- I shouldn't have come. I'm sorry. I'm going to go.”
“You came here to talk though-”
“It was a mistake. I should have called first.”
Boris is left confused. Yuriy didn't want this, so he found a relationship elsewhere. How could he be upset? Yuriy goes home and rips apart his room again, punching a hole in his wall in the process. If he had known he wouldn't have gone. He didn't think Boris would have moved on.
-
Yuriy ends up phoning Kai. He’s not sure why. “You offered to hook up before, that offer still available?”
“Sure. I said I'd wine and dine you too, so get dressed up and we’ll get dinner first.” He hangs up before Yuriy can protest.
Yuriy does not end up getting laid that night. Kai confronts him after dinner, “Sleeping with me would just be a fucked up form of self harm to you at this point. I'm assuming you heard that Boris is seeing someone and that’s why you wanted to meet up.”
“Why agree to take me out to dinner if you werent going to fuck me.”
Kai shrugs, “Sergei said you haven’t been eating. Figured I’d at least trick you into getting some food into you. You look like shit.”
Yuriy glares at him, “So i’ve been told already today.”
“I was only half serious when I offered to hook up with you back then. I said it more to piss off Kuznetsov. IF you weren’t doing this as some kind of fucked up punishment, I would take you home.”
Yuriy/’s eyes narrow and he sips at his cocktail, “At least let me get drunk and forget my problems.”
“Gladly.”
Yuriy isn't sure when Kai turned into this caring individual who took care of people, but he finds himself that next morning tucked into his bed, not remembering much of what happened after or even getting home.
-
Months go by, with Yuriy barely taking care of himself. He misses Boris.Misses everything he took for granted.
Yuriy going to Boris and being like I know things are different now, but is there a chance for us to hang out again. So they do a Borg movie night. And Yuriy tries to ignore how Boris sits in a different spot. Swallows down burning feeling in his throat. Boris would always be embarrassingly close when they would watch movies together. Thigh pressed up against Yuriy’s and his arm wrapped around Yuriy’s neck, fingers brushing against his bicep.
Now Boris is five feet away on a different piece of furniture. At least at dinner he sits at his old seat next to Yuriy, and he can relax just a little, feeling comfortable enough to eat.
Then Sergei is offering coffee and dessert and Boris passes up on the dessert, saying he’s trying to watch his weight and that his girlfriend is such a good cook and a stress baker, and that he’s put on ten pounds since they got together. Offhandedly saying its hard to want to go to the gym in the morning when shes next to him.
And Yuriy excuses himself from the table. He's going to be sick. He locks himself in the bathroom. He can't breathe and he honestly feels like the food he just ate is going to find its way outside of him.
He shoots Sergei a text that he cant do this. He cant he cant he cant.
Yuriy composes himself the best he can and goes back into the kitchen. Excusing himself that he feels sick. That he ate too much. He feels his face flush when Ivan even mentions it's nice to see him eat like a normal person for once, but not if he’s getting sick from it.
Yuriy hides himself in his room, and cries. Everything inside of him hurts and it radiates outside of him. He cant hold this inside of him anymore. Crying into his pillow.
His head telling him, he only has himself to blame. He didnt want Boris as a partner, so Boris found one. He did this to himself. If only he stepped up and faced his fears.
-
More time goes by. And more movie nights and game nights, and Boris starts bringing the girlfriend over, and Yuriy wants to hate her, but she is so nice to him, and he feels awful being cold towards her. (Hates seeing her make Boris laugh and happy, but he fights that feeling back). Seeing Boris still hurts, but it gets easier.
A scene somewhere, where Yuriy is telling Boris, he didn't want things to change, because he didn't want to lose Boris, but it still happened. This wasnt how things were supposed to be. This was supposed to save them. They would always be close, always have each other. He was scared to lose him, and it happened anyway. And he starts crying, he doesn't even feel embarrassed anymore crying, even crying in front of someone.
-
And this is like the turning point, where things start to change and aren’t so sad.
-
Boris and his girlfriend will be cuddling after sex, and of all times to say something, she’s like, “Boris, be honest with me. You love him.”
??
Yuriy, you love him.
Boris is still confused, Yes, I love him and Sergei and Ivan.
Borya. You love him.
I love you, *insert whatever her name will be*
Yes, but not in the way you love him. You love me because of how I am. What I give to you. He couldn't do what I do.
“He didn’t want this. Want me.” Boris replies.
“I love you Boris, and I know you love me, just not in the way I want you to. You’re the best boyfriend I’ve had, and honestly some of the best sex I’ve had. I care about you so much that I think, though, that we should end this. Go be with Yuriy-
No. He doesn't want me.
I Think that’s changed.
They go back and forth, until she’s like, We don't have to break up. I don't plan on leaving if we do. I just want you to be happy. Boris promises that he will at least talk to Yuriy, and she kisses him on the head, and gets in the shower.
-
Boris arranges a meeting with Yuriy, who is starting to look human again. THe bags under his eyes are less dark, and his cheekbones aren't threatening to cut through his skin. He seems nervous, his eyes shifting around, like he’s expecting something, and then it dawns on him.
“She’s not here Yura, it’s just us.” Yuriy seems to calm down if only for a minute before the nickname has him looking funny again. Boris hesitates before reaching across the table and grabs for Yuriy’s hand. He’s half expecting Yuriy to retract his hand or pull back
“Can we talk? We haven’t talked in a long time.”
Yuriy nods slowly, looking down at Boris’ hand.
Boris says that his girlfriend broke up with him, which is the simplest way of putting it, because of Yuriy. That Boris is still in love with Yuriy. He loved the girlfriend, but loved that she did everything he wished Yuriy would have done. That he still wants to be with Yuriy.
Yuriy is too stunned to speak initially and then he’s like, but you two were so happy.
She called it off, because she knew i was in love with you, and that you were in love with me. She said she couldnt sit back and let that happen.
-
And then the lord said let there be fluff. They date! Yuriy feels awkward and embarrassed doing PDA. And he’s anxious and nervous that he’ll do something wrong, but Boris is always beaming when Yuriy holds his hand in public, and how proud he is that Yuriy is trying so hard to give him what he wants.
(also the ex-gf does corner him, and is like im happy you two are figuring things out, but if you fuck this up, I’m not going to give him up a second time. And yuriy’s like i don’t plan it.)
Bryan is 100% okay with PDA. He loves holding Tala, kissing Tala, touching Tala in public. Loves showing off the redhead. He’s very protective (not that Tala needs it. Tala is more than capable of taking care of himself. But Bryan in a heartbeat would do that and more for him)
Tala is the complete opposite. He’s not a fan of being intimate or flirty in front of others. Spencer and Ivan are the exceptions (and Kai when he decides to pop up in Russia). Not that Tala is embarrassed by Bryan or not that he wants to hide him away. He’s just uncomfortable expressing himself like that in front of others.
The two compromise on PDA. Tala will give him a look when he’s had enough.
Bryan loves to push boundaries tho. Loves saying things sexually about Tala to get him wound up. Some might think Tala’s prude about how he responds to some of the nonsense Bryan says. But he’s not. Tala just likes keeping their “us” to themselves. (Again with the same exceptions listed above. Tala even plays into it. Especially with Kai, because Kai can be a shithead and deserves it. And making Kai all red is a plus)
Behind closed doors the two are very soft with each other. Cuddling spooning. Kissing. A soft side that’s exclusive to each other. Once they leave the sanctuary that is their shared room, it’s all hidden by sarcasm, jokes, and eye rolls.
bryan 👏 is 👏 tala’s 👏 rock 👏
also loving the idea that tala thinks he’s so independent and needs no one, and that without him bryan would not survive. but in reality tala is unhealthily codependent for bryan. (and it takes bryan going on a trip with his work friends (which wow tala’s like who the fuck are those guys) for tala to realize he had everything backwards)
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Relationships: Yuri Ivanov | Tala Valkov/Boris Kuznetsov | Bryan Kuznetsov
Characters: Boris Kuznetsov | Bryan Kuznetsov, Yuriy Ivanov | Tala
Warnings idk: Ivan used the word homo affectionately, very brief blood mention
Summary:
A short one shot where Yuriy struggles to tell Boris what he wants.
