TAJ GHOST

people in San Antonio, Texas We produce art, poetry, music, along with other side projects/collaborations.

[midnightmemoriesmp3-deactivated]

[tajghost]

Listen/purchase: Flossy clouds / Darian stahl Split by TAJ GHOST

[mkandashleyultra-deactivated202]

Listen/purchase: Changa by Darian Stahl

this is my ep until Desert boy comes out. 3 songs all written in Nuevo Mexico, a free download & some sexy pics. can’t wait to get Desert boy finished, i think it will be good

[massivegypsum]

*_*

[clatterminded]

stay sweet. by josh fernandez.

19 track album

it has been a month, and i never posted this..

so here you go. 

stay sweet. - josh fernandez. 

dec 15, 2014

"thank you everyone for your patience.  this album was special and it was hard to tell myself when the tracks were finished. there were times that i got over my songs, but i have come back and gained my liking of them again. i hope you get something positive out of this, and i truly appreciate everyone and everything.  thank you taj ghost.  /enjoy.”

[mkandashleyultra-deactivated202]

me and clint did a thing to body party by ciara, is good

[tajghost]

stick together & take care of each other

[mkandashleyultra-deactivated202]

v rough drafts of music i am working on w my friend will mcgovern. we have a lot more songs but are doing band stuff & arrangements for these and others (w clint dierker on the drums) at the moment so aren’t recording right now, but we will soon as a band!!

[foucault-the-haters-deactivated]

[nevver]

Frank O’Hara

[tajghost]

<p>sPooky „, o0o<br/> /////////////////<br/> \\\\\\\\\ (((((((((👻)))))))))<br/> //////////////////<br/> \\\\\\\\\

[thesouthtexanescort]

old project I did for taj ghost. Remember observations-and-bitchings ? 😊

[mkandashleyultra-deactivated202]

[tajghost]

by darian stahl

[cerebraltremors]

official cover by ivan gonzalez. letterwork by corrigan moran, charlie barrientes, clint dierker,& darian stahl, finished at 5 am this morning. printing today. official release friday. feel like sobbing, but also feel v tranquil about the end of this.

[nythium]

Enclosure / Ivan Gonzalez

Photography for Observations and Bitchings, book by Darian Stahl.

[mkandashleyultra-deactivated202]

I havent cooked japanese food for wks. I quit my job at la panadería. I keep forgetting to eat, as my mind is too occupued in forcing itself to be healthy.

I am scared as i think, “if all this feeling is supposed to be natural & healthy, why does anyone ever try to feel natural & healthy?”

I am terrified of lasts. I want to be determined like Clint & genuine like Olivia & compassionate like Corrigan & sensitive like Josh & grounded like Ethan but i feel myself come up short.

Im moving on a conveyor belt to the end & cant even begin to think of a beginning.

I didnt publish Observations & Bitchings & i didnt go camping alone together w someone i love. My grandma is dying & i never made tortillas w her. I never learned what happened to my nana in her last marriage or in the TB clinic lock up jail. I didnt show my mom my poetry or help her w what helped me thro her tears & i didnt explain to my dad the benefits of exploring his mind.

Obviously i can do all this later but the point is that it didnt happen during this era. I didnt even learn how to write poetry that isnt confessional.

& obviously i’ll have a new life filled w probably great new things & ppl say “oh you’ll forget all about it your first 3 months in.” but what they dont see is that is exactly what is terrifying to me: between wanting to see everyone move on & not wanting them to forget me, between wanting to meet new exciting ppl & not forgiving myself in making the decision to leave the first real family I’ve ever found but this wk has surely taught me the truth about jealousy: how it’s not about love, it’s about ego.

I just cant help but feel that waiting to feel better is like waiting to watch water boil & i know i’ll forget the water was never not boiling once it starts, just like i knew i would feel all of this but am still in shock that i am.

I usually finish these long “i” poems w some sort of hope, but i dont know. I’m not sure. I heard her say “I forgot i was hungry.” & still feel now what i felt then.

[chifladazine]

I remember seeing girls in 6th grade snapping rubber bands on their wrists & feeling awful lightening under my skin every time their eyes closed. I could only feel their pain as loudly as I could hear the sting. I felt the rooms stretch & my heart sink. They beat their heads & strained their teeth clenching a suffering my hallucinatory empathy could only convince me I felt. I looked at them & I looked at the boys. I saw their search for blossom & decay faster than they could say “You’re not my friend anymore!” & regenerate. I saw the boys torture the rubber band girls when they weren’t looking. I felt them egg me to join them, & I remember the feeling of paper cuts in between my fingers when I would feel torn & nervous. I remember the smells: the musty spray canisters of porn the boys sprayed till were almost high. the Claire’s perfumes & burnt hair. I remember looking back and forth- I felt like neither the boys or the girls. I felt my conditioning separate like oil & water. I could feel the heaviness in my eyes & the muddiness of my thoughts. I just wanted to be a friend. but in my fear I could only be a witness.

-Darian Stahl, "Snapping Girls" on CHIFLADA (via cholasquat)

GUYS LOOK !!!

(via observations-and-bitchings)

friends

[tajghost]

today will be shamans last show. pls come support & make fun of them when they cry. they play at 5:30. will also be selling zines.