I loved you, you used me - Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Summary: As a floater, you're sent to the worst firehouse you could think of - the one where your ex is a lieutenant.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Warning: mentions of addiction.
Word Count: 1.8k
A/N: Sooo, after a few years without updating this page, here I am as if nothing happened. Sorry guys, life has been crazy. Just finished my degree in Physics and started my master's degree in Education. English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day/night and enjoy this! 💕
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"I'm telling you, man. I swear to God I've seen her before." Cruz tells Capp as they sit by the squad table. "I just don't know where, you know?"
"Yeah, I see what you're talking about." Capp agreed, resting his feet on the table. "Maybe she was an actress and we've seen her on television. I don't know."
The conversation caught Severide's attention, his eyes moved from the newspaper in his hands to the two firefighters. "Who are you talking about?"
"The girl in Chief's office," Cruz stated. "We've seen her before, but we don't know where."
"And here is the app floor!" Brett walked out of the firehouse with a smile on her face, showing you the rest of Firehouse 51. "Oh, and these boys right here are on Squad 3." She pointed at the men and flashed them a smile, not noticing the look on Severide's face.
The sight in front of Severide's eyes caught him by surprise. It's been years since he last saw you. He had so many questions. Where have you been? What were you doing here? Why was the girl he once used to date standing right behind Brett?
"Cruz, Capp, Tony, and Severide, this is Y/L/N. She's the new floater on Ambo 61." Brett introduced you to them as you flashed a shy smile, avoiding Severide's eyes the whole time. You knew one day you would have to face him again. But if you had a choice, you would never choose to work by his side. Not after everything you went through. But since you were sent here, all you wanted to do was leave the past behind you and do your job.
"Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you!" You walked to the table and shook their hands, one by one. At Severide's turn, you swallowed hard and looked down, not meeting his confused yet curious eyes as he firmly shook your hand. You'd be lying if you said you didn't miss his touch, the warmth of his skin.
"So, Y/L/N," Cruz spoke, making you turn around to face him. "Haven't we met already? Cause I'm pretty sure I've seen you before."
You frowned at his question, tilting your head to the side as you tried to think about it. "Huh...I don't think so..." You answered, knowing you two had met while you dated Severide, but since you wanted to forget that part of your life you didn't touch the subject.
-/-/-
After coming back from another call, you made your way through the app floor and went straight to the kitchen. You still didn't know where all the food and the utensils were, so it was taking quite a long time to make just a simple sandwich.
"For God's sake-" You mumbled, standing on a chair while you looked for a plate inside the kitchen cabinet.
"Need some help?" Severide's voice echoed through the room, making you lose your balance and almost fall from the chair. He rushed to help you but you quickly managed to steady yourself.
"No, I'm good." You shot back, not looking at him. Once those words came out of your mouth you noticed how rude you sounded, so you tried to repair it. "Thanks though." You quietly said, finally meeting his eyes.
"Anytime." He smiled, watching you go back to the counter to make your sandwich. "Can I ask you something?" He made his way to your side and leaned on the counter.
"Depends..." You answered, keeping your attention on the food in your hands. "If you wanna ask something about my past, go for it. But I won't answer it." You confessed, making Severide laugh.
"Seriously, Y/N. Why did you leave?" He asked either way. The way he sounded hurt almost made you feel sorry for him. "You always push people away. I just thought you'd never do it to me."
That, right there, was enough to make a switch flip in your head. "And why is that? Huh? Why do you think I pushed you away?" You shot back, putting your sandwich back on the plate as you stared at him in shock.
"What the hell's going on with you?" He frowned. "Seriously. What's going on? You've been treating me like shit since the minute you stepped inside this firehouse."
"You're unbelievable." You whispered. Looking back at the plate, you pushed it away and shook your head. "I lost my appetite." Before you could step away, Severide grabbed your arm.
"Come on, Y/N. What have I done to you?" His voice sounded genuine as if he didn't know all the hell he made you go through.
You let go of his hand on your arm, incredulously. "What have you done to me!?" You whispered-yelled, holding back the tears. "You used me, Kelly! I loved you, you used me. All you wanted was someone who could provide you with those fucking pills. I never meant anything to you."
"What!? No!" He quickly shook his head. "Y/N, I didn't use you. I was dating you because I liked you." He confessed.
"Look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't reach out to me because you needed those pills." You whispered, knowing your voice would fail if you tried to speak louder. The few seconds of silence coming from Severide said it all. He used you.
"I don't have the energy to fight you anymore." You confessed, stepping away. "I'll tell Boden I wanna be transferred to another house." Severide watched your back as you walked out of the room.
-/-/-
Walking inside the locker room, Severide greeted the firefighters from the last shift as they grabbed their bags to leave. As he got ready for his shift, he could hear the men chatting by his side, but didn't pay any attention - that’s until he heard your name being thrown in the conversation.
“Is that Y/L/N?” One of them asked, looking over the bunk room as you walked by. “I didn’t know she was working at 51 now.”
“I didn’t know they were accepting junkies.” The other one scoffed.
Severide turned around and grabbed the man’s arm before the group exited the room. “What did you say?”
“Hey, take it easy…it was a joke!” He laughed, freeing his arm from Severide’s hold. “We’re all friends here, there’s no need to get angry over this.”
Seeing Severide’s confusion, another man stepped in. “Rumors says she got caught stealing some pills from the ambo once, back at Firehouse 36.” He confessed. “...has been jumping from one station to another ever since.”
“When was that?” The lieutenant asked.
“Man, I don’t know…a few years ago.” He replied before leaving the room.
The new information took Severide off guard. He didn’t have to do the math, it was obvious that you got caught getting those pills for him. Of course you despised him, you have every reason to do so.
-/-/-
“Did something happen between you two?” Brett curiously asked as her eyes darted between you and Severide while you cleaned the ambo.
You looked over at the lieutenant sitting at the squad table and took a heavy sight. “Well, there’s no use in hiding anything from you, so…” you turned your back to Severide and faced Brett. “We…dated - if that’s even the right word - a few years ago.”
Brett gasped, then let out a short laugh. “Of course! I should have realised that! It was obvious by the way he’s always looking at you…”
“Oh, shut up!” You rolled your eyes. “It was a long time ago…a lot of things happened back then. We’re not on good terms.” You confessed, earning back a “spill the tea” look from your new friend. “He used me to get something he needed. He was desperate and I was stupid.” You glanced at the lieutenant, “...I got caught doing something for him and he wasn’t there to have my back.”
“Oh…” Brett sighed. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know he was an asshole.” She confessed, making you laugh. “And the asshole is walking over here, so let’s change the subject..”
You took a deep breath before turning around and facing the lieutenant. “Hey, can we talk?” He asked you with a strange look on his face.
“Humm…sure.” was all you could answer. You followed him inside the firehouse and waited for him to speak.
“You never told me you got caught getting me those pills.” He confronted you, catching off guard. “You never said anything. Why?”
All you could do was laugh. “Are you being serious right now?” You frowned, trying your best to keep your tone down. “Shit went down for me because of your fucking addiction! I almost lost my job! What did you want me to do? To come over here and say what??”
“I don’t know…” He confessed. “I just wish I knew what you were going through. I can’t help but feel responsible.”
“Well, maybe because you are responsible, Kelly!” You hissed back at him.
“I never forced you to do anything-”
“Ohhh, really…you’re pulling that card, hum?”
“I- I didn’t mean that…I’m sorry.” He sighed, rubbing his face as the conversation got out of control. “I’m sorry…for everything, Y/N.”
“Yeah, well, there’s not much you can do now…” You answered, tired of the conversation that just started. “I’m gonna be honest with you, Kelly. I have no intention of sticking around this firehouse. I’m a floater and I’m at peace with that. I just wanna do my job.”
The look on Severide’s face as you said those words made you frown. “What if there was something I could do about that? What- What if you could stay here?”
“Here? At 51? With you??” You asked incredulously. You couldn’t believe he was really saying this. “Kelly, I’m sorry, but this is the last place I wanna be.”
“Why? It’s not that bad…and I can see you’re already making friends.” He looked out the window and glanced at the blonde PIC.
You flashed a short smile at Brett. You, in fact, were making a new friend. Something you hadn’t done in a while, since you never stay in one place for too long. “I don’t know, Kelly…”
“Please, let me try…I can talk to Boden about it.” He sent you a soft smile. “That’s the least I can do.”
You rubbed your face and sighed. Maybe this was his chance of doing something right after all these years. Maybe this was your chance to plant your roots somewhere, make friends…make peace with your past.
Severide’s smile brought your attention back to him. “So…what do you say?” The lieutenant asked.
“Well, screw it. Let’s do this.” You smiled, forgetting the fight you had just a few minutes ago.
Severide extended his hand out, and you shook it. “So…we’re good now?”
“Hell no, don’t push it…” You pushed him back and walked out of the house with a soft grin on your face.
Severide watched you walk away with a smile on his face, his eyes darting to your ass just as you turned around and caught him red handed.
"Why do you run away from your problems all the time?" Kelly curiously asked, crossing his arms as he leaned on the squad table.
"I don't. I'm just running away from you." You flashed a smile, earning a short laugh from your lieutenant. "Do I think you're a problem? Yes! Are you my problem though…? I don't think so."
Kelly's laugh didn't last long as he looked you in the eyes and sighed, a sad smile forming on his face. "I'm sorry things didn't work out between us. I really like you. Even though you're a pain in my ass…" He gently punched you in the arm.
"Oh, c'mon! The only reason I won't call you an asshole is 'cause I'm not in the mood to spend the rest of the week washing our truck." You rolled your eyes.
"That's my girl, always doing the smart thing." He winked before leaving the room.
"Why do you run away from your problems all the time?" Kelly curiously asked, crossing his arms as he leaned on the squad table.
"I don't. I'm just running away from you." You flashed a smile, earning a short laugh from your lieutenant. "Do I think you're a problem? Yes! Are you my problem though…? I don't think so."
Kelly's laugh didn't last long as he looked you in the eyes and sighed, a sad smile forming on his face. "I'm sorry things didn't work out between us. I really like you. Even though you're a pain in my ass…" He gently punched you in the arm.
"Oh, c'mon! The only reason I won't call you an asshole is 'cause I'm not in the mood to spend the rest of the week washing our truck." You rolled your eyes.
"That's my girl, always doing the smart thing." He winked before leaving the room.
Summary: When Y/N has to choose between her boyfriend and her career, she chooses the last one, moving away to Sacramento. Five years later, Y/N is transferred to Firehouse 51 and has to work side by side with her ex-boyfriend, the man whose heart she broke.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Firefighter!Reader
Word Count: 1.9k
Warning: alcohol (?).
A/N: Hey, guys! This was supposed to be a one-shot but I decided to turn it into a series. English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day and enjoy the fic! 💕
Series Masterlist
Playing with the empty glass in your hand, your eyes darted to the happy couple sitting a few feet away from you at the bar. Flirting and giggling at each other, they looked so in love. It could be you, you thought.
"Hey, buddy." You waved a hand at the bartender, raising your glass. "Pour me another one."
"Tough day, huh?" The bartender asked, taking the bottle of bourbon in his hand and pouring the liquid in your glass for the third time that night.
The day hadn't been tough but the week was about to be, you thought.
After working with wildfires in Sacramento for five years, you decided to come back to Chicago. Two weeks ago, your transfer request was accepted by the CFD. What you didn't expect was to be transferred to Firehouse 51 out of all the other firehouses. Apparently, the CFD had closed some houses, something to do with the low budget, and now they needed a new lieutenant for Engine 51.
You are supposed to work side by side with your ex-boyfriend, Kelly Severide. The man whose heart you broke.
You met Kelly at headquarters when you were in the Academy. He asked you out on a date and a few months later you were in love with each other. He was by your side during your entire time in the academy, showing you support and encouraging you to pursue your dream. As a firefighter, he would always teach you some tricks to improve your performance on the tests and he would spend the whole night awake by your side helping you study.
A few weeks later, you passed the tests and started working at Firehouse 45 as a candidate. Even though you made your dream of being a firefighter come true and you had an amazing boyfriend by your side, you felt like something was missing, you weren't really happy.
That's when you applied for the wildland firefighter training. Kelly was really proud of you and supportive during the whole training. When you spent three months in Sacramento, he missed you but he understood that this was your dream, and even if he had to be away from you for a little while, he encouraged you to continue because he could see how happy you were.
That was until the day you received a letter from the California Department of Forestry and Fire Protection. They wanted you to be transferred to Sacramento, permanently. That was the offer of your dreams.
Since you were just a little girl, your mom use to tell you to never put a man in front of your career. You would always have your career, but a man could always leave.
Taking a sip from your drink, you let your mind wander to the man you left behind five years ago. There was something about the taste of bourbon that reminded you of the way he used to kiss you - gently, but with a bite to it. Closing your eyes, you let the flashbacks flood your mind.
"You're not actually considering this, are you?" Kelly asked, standing in the middle of his living room, holding the letter in his hands. "Are you!?" He asked again with his brow raised.
"Kelly, this is my dream that we're talking about. Of course, I'm considering it!" You snapped back, taking the letter from his hands.
Pacing around the leaving room, he ran his hands through his hair. "So that means you're leaving...You're leaving me, aren't you?" His narrowed eyes locked with yours.
Slightly shaking your head, you let the tears fall from your eyes. "Please, Kelly...don't make me choose." You begged. "Please, baby." You walked towards him and tried to embrace him in your arms, but he pushed you away.
“How was I such an idiot, to believe that you, out of all people, could ever love me?” He scoffed, shaking his head frantically.
"I do! I love you, Kelly..." You whispered, feeling the tears roll down your cheeks.
"No, you don't!" He snapped back. "If you loved me you wouldn't do this!"
Feeling like your legs were giving up on you, you took a sit on the couch and rested your head on the palm of your hands. This was not how you wanted this to go. Your heart was already broken, you didn't want to break his heart too.
“Did it mean anything to you?" Kelly whispered, standing in front of you. "Did I mean anything to you?” Throwing his hands in the air, he continued to pace around. The feeling of anger and betrayal kept him from standing still.
"Kelly, please, don't say that..." You sobbed, feeling your whole body shake. "I'm just doing what I think is right.."
"Yeah, for you!" He barked. "You're doing what you think is best for you but what about me? What about us? You're just going to throw everything we have in the trash??" The only thing he could hear was the loud heartbeat in his ear, the tears blurring his vision. He couldn't believe you were leaving him.
The lump on your throat kept you from speaking, so you just sat there for a minute, sobbing. "I don't know what do you want me to say..." You whispered between sobs.
"Then don't say anything." He said, his voice cold as ice. "Just leave. Pack your shit and go."
"Miss?" The bartender called you. "I'm sorry but we're closing the bar. I'm gonna have to ask you to leave." He said softly, shooting you an apologetic look.
Wiping off the tears that had fallen from your eyes, you paid for your drinks and walked back home.
-/-/-
Parking in front of the firehouse, you glanced at your phone and noticed you were thirty minutes early, just like Chief Boden asked. Since you've dated Kelly for a couple of years, you knew most of his colleagues and an introduction was almost unnecessary. The fact that you were about to see familiar faces brought you some sense of relief.
As you walked inside the firehouse and looked around for Chief Boden, a young man walk towards you.
"Hi! Are you looking for someone?" His voice was soft, sympathetic.
"Yeah, I'm looking for Chief Boden. Do you know where I can find him?" You asked, raising a brow.
"Sure, he's in his office. Follow me." He smiled and waved his hand, gesturing you to follow him. "Ah! I'm Ritter, by the way." He added.
"Nice to meet you, Ritter. I'm Y/L/N." You said, walking behind him.
"So you're my new lieutenant?" He curiously asked, turning around to face you.
"If you're on Engine 51, then I guess I am." You nodded, smiling.
Knocking on the Chief's door, Ritter let him know of your presence and then made his way back to the common room.
As soon as you saw Boden's face, your lips curved into a big smile.
"Y/L/N! It's great to see you." His deep voice was soft. Gesturing for you to take a seat in his office, a fond smile appeared on his face.
"Yeah, it's great to see you too, Chief." You smiled back. Taking a seat on the chair in front of his desk, you placed your bag on the floor.
After giving you a presentation about Firehouse 51 and the truck you were about to run, he removed his glasses and gave you a hesitant look.
"Y/L/N, as I always do when a new lieutenant or captain arrives, I'll call my other two lieutenants to have a brief meeting with us. This way, you can get to know better each other's works and even discuss new ways to approach calls so that no one steps on anyone's toes, if you know what I mean." He asked, studying your face.
"Sure, I understand." You nodded your head in agreement and bit the inside of your cheek, already knowing what he was trying to say.
"I heard that you and Severide are not really in good terms. I'm sorry if I'm being too...invasive but as your Chief, I have to ask...are we going to have a problem with you and Severide working together?" Raising his brows, he patiently waited for you to answer.
You let out a sigh and licked your lips. "Chief, I'm here to do my job and I do not intend on letting my personal life affect my performance. I worked really hard to get where I am today and I'm not going to ruin it over something that's in the past. What happened between me and Severide was five years ago. There's not gonna be a problem between us, I'm sure he will agree with me." You reassured him, flashing a half-smile.
"Great, that's exactly what I wanted to hear." He smiled and walked to the door, opening it and asking for the two men to come inside.
Severide was the first one to walk through the door. The moment you saw him, your heart stopped and your jaw hung slightly open. He still had this effect on you after five years.
He looked different. He had salt and pepper hair and his face had aged a little. But those eyes...they were still the same eyes you fell in love with.
You were so caught up in your thoughts that you barely noticed Casey's hand extended in front of you. Getting up quickly, you shook his hand and smiled.
Extending your hand to Severide, he hesitated for a few seconds before shaking it. Those eyes that used to look at you with tenderness and love now were filled with indifference. But that's better than hate, you thought.
During the whole meeting, Severide avoided your eyes and didn't share a word with you. You could see by the frantically tapping of his foot that he was impatient and would rather be anywhere else.
After the meeting with Boden and the other lieutenants, you introduced yourself to the firefighters and paramedics you haven't met yet. There were a lot of new faces. Ritter introduced you to the other firefighters on Engine 51 and to the other candidate, Gallo. You quickly made a bond with Kidd, Brett, and Violet. You felt a strong connection with the girls, something about them told you would become good friends.
Taking a seat next to Brett in the common room, you placed your coffee on the table and started to read the newspapers, an old habit you got from your time in Sacramento.
Herrmann took a seat next to you and flashed you a big smile. "God, I remember when you were just a kid, at Firehouse 45..." He said, taking a sip of his coffee. "And now you're a lieutenant, huh?" The way he smiled showed you he was proud.
"Yeah...it took some years and a lot of hard work but...I made it." You nodded your head and smiled, proud of your journey.
"Guess it was all worth it after all." Kelly mumbled, getting up from his chair and leaving the room.
His sudden comeback surprised everyone. Biting the inside of your cheek, you lowered your head and stared at the mug in your hands. You couldn't let this affect you, you promised Boden.
"Hey." Herrmann brushed his hand on your shoulder. "Don't mind him. He just needs some time." He shrugged, his lips curving into a half-smile.
"Yeah, maybe five years wasn't enough.." You muttered, finishing your coffee.
Summary: When Y/N has to choose between her boyfriend and her career, she chooses the last one, moving away to Sacramento. Five years later, Y/N is transferred to Firehouse 51 and has to work side by side with her ex-boyfriend, the man whose heart she broke.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Firefighter!Reader
Warnings: alcohol, mention of death, panic attack.
A/N: Hey, guys! This was supposed to be a one-shot but I decided to turn it into a series. I'm planning on posting one chapter every Monday. English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. I hope you enjoy the series! 💕
Chapter One: The Reunion
Chapter Two: Sorry Doesn't Fix Everything
Chapter Three: We'll Work It Out
Chapter Four: You Have To Stay Awake
Chapter Five: Yes, A Thousand Times Yes!
Want to join my tag list? You can request it here!
I loved you, you used me - Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Summary: As a floater, you're sent to the worst firehouse you could think of - the one where your ex is a lieutenant.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Warning: mentions of addiction.
Word Count: 1.8k
A/N: Sooo, after a few years without updating this page, here I am as if nothing happened. Sorry guys, life has been crazy. Just finished my degree in Physics and started my master's degree in Education. English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day/night and enjoy this! 💕
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"I'm telling you, man. I swear to God I've seen her before." Cruz tells Capp as they sit by the squad table. "I just don't know where, you know?"
"Yeah, I see what you're talking about." Capp agreed, resting his feet on the table. "Maybe she was an actress and we've seen her on television. I don't know."
The conversation caught Severide's attention, his eyes moved from the newspaper in his hands to the two firefighters. "Who are you talking about?"
"The girl in Chief's office," Cruz stated. "We've seen her before, but we don't know where."
"And here is the app floor!" Brett walked out of the firehouse with a smile on her face, showing you the rest of Firehouse 51. "Oh, and these boys right here are on Squad 3." She pointed at the men and flashed them a smile, not noticing the look on Severide's face.
The sight in front of Severide's eyes caught him by surprise. It's been years since he last saw you. He had so many questions. Where have you been? What were you doing here? Why was the girl he once used to date standing right behind Brett?
"Cruz, Capp, Tony, and Severide, this is Y/L/N. She's the new floater on Ambo 61." Brett introduced you to them as you flashed a shy smile, avoiding Severide's eyes the whole time. You knew one day you would have to face him again. But if you had a choice, you would never choose to work by his side. Not after everything you went through. But since you were sent here, all you wanted to do was leave the past behind you and do your job.
"Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you!" You walked to the table and shook their hands, one by one. At Severide's turn, you swallowed hard and looked down, not meeting his confused yet curious eyes as he firmly shook your hand. You'd be lying if you said you didn't miss his touch, the warmth of his skin.
"So, Y/L/N," Cruz spoke, making you turn around to face him. "Haven't we met already? Cause I'm pretty sure I've seen you before."
You frowned at his question, tilting your head to the side as you tried to think about it. "Huh...I don't think so..." You answered, knowing you two had met while you dated Severide, but since you wanted to forget that part of your life you didn't touch the subject.
-/-/-
After coming back from another call, you made your way through the app floor and went straight to the kitchen. You still didn't know where all the food and the utensils were, so it was taking quite a long time to make just a simple sandwich.
"For God's sake-" You mumbled, standing on a chair while you looked for a plate inside the kitchen cabinet.
"Need some help?" Severide's voice echoed through the room, making you lose your balance and almost fall from the chair. He rushed to help you but you quickly managed to steady yourself.
"No, I'm good." You shot back, not looking at him. Once those words came out of your mouth you noticed how rude you sounded, so you tried to repair it. "Thanks though." You quietly said, finally meeting his eyes.
"Anytime." He smiled, watching you go back to the counter to make your sandwich. "Can I ask you something?" He made his way to your side and leaned on the counter.
"Depends..." You answered, keeping your attention on the food in your hands. "If you wanna ask something about my past, go for it. But I won't answer it." You confessed, making Severide laugh.
"Seriously, Y/N. Why did you leave?" He asked either way. The way he sounded hurt almost made you feel sorry for him. "You always push people away. I just thought you'd never do it to me."
That, right there, was enough to make a switch flip in your head. "And why is that? Huh? Why do you think I pushed you away?" You shot back, putting your sandwich back on the plate as you stared at him in shock.
"What the hell's going on with you?" He frowned. "Seriously. What's going on? You've been treating me like shit since the minute you stepped inside this firehouse."
"You're unbelievable." You whispered. Looking back at the plate, you pushed it away and shook your head. "I lost my appetite." Before you could step away, Severide grabbed your arm.
"Come on, Y/N. What have I done to you?" His voice sounded genuine as if he didn't know all the hell he made you go through.
You let go of his hand on your arm, incredulously. "What have you done to me!?" You whispered-yelled, holding back the tears. "You used me, Kelly! I loved you, you used me. All you wanted was someone who could provide you with those fucking pills. I never meant anything to you."
"What!? No!" He quickly shook his head. "Y/N, I didn't use you. I was dating you because I liked you." He confessed.
"Look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't reach out to me because you needed those pills." You whispered, knowing your voice would fail if you tried to speak louder. The few seconds of silence coming from Severide said it all. He used you.
"I don't have the energy to fight you anymore." You confessed, stepping away. "I'll tell Boden I wanna be transferred to another house." Severide watched your back as you walked out of the room.
-/-/-
Walking inside the locker room, Severide greeted the firefighters from the last shift as they grabbed their bags to leave. As he got ready for his shift, he could hear the men chatting by his side, but didn't pay any attention - that’s until he heard your name being thrown in the conversation.
“Is that Y/L/N?” One of them asked, looking over the bunk room as you walked by. “I didn’t know she was working at 51 now.”
“I didn’t know they were accepting junkies.” The other one scoffed.
Severide turned around and grabbed the man’s arm before the group exited the room. “What did you say?”
“Hey, take it easy…it was a joke!” He laughed, freeing his arm from Severide’s hold. “We’re all friends here, there’s no need to get angry over this.”
Seeing Severide’s confusion, another man stepped in. “Rumors says she got caught stealing some pills from the ambo once, back at Firehouse 36.” He confessed. “...has been jumping from one station to another ever since.”
“When was that?” The lieutenant asked.
“Man, I don’t know…a few years ago.” He replied before leaving the room.
The new information took Severide off guard. He didn’t have to do the math, it was obvious that you got caught getting those pills for him. Of course you despised him, you have every reason to do so.
-/-/-
“Did something happen between you two?” Brett curiously asked as her eyes darted between you and Severide while you cleaned the ambo.
You looked over at the lieutenant sitting at the squad table and took a heavy sight. “Well, there’s no use in hiding anything from you, so…” you turned your back to Severide and faced Brett. “We…dated - if that’s even the right word - a few years ago.”
Brett gasped, then let out a short laugh. “Of course! I should have realised that! It was obvious by the way he’s always looking at you…”
“Oh, shut up!” You rolled your eyes. “It was a long time ago…a lot of things happened back then. We’re not on good terms.” You confessed, earning back a “spill the tea” look from your new friend. “He used me to get something he needed. He was desperate and I was stupid.” You glanced at the lieutenant, “...I got caught doing something for him and he wasn’t there to have my back.”
“Oh…” Brett sighed. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know he was an asshole.” She confessed, making you laugh. “And the asshole is walking over here, so let’s change the subject..”
You took a deep breath before turning around and facing the lieutenant. “Hey, can we talk?” He asked you with a strange look on his face.
“Humm…sure.” was all you could answer. You followed him inside the firehouse and waited for him to speak.
“You never told me you got caught getting me those pills.” He confronted you, catching off guard. “You never said anything. Why?”
All you could do was laugh. “Are you being serious right now?” You frowned, trying your best to keep your tone down. “Shit went down for me because of your fucking addiction! I almost lost my job! What did you want me to do? To come over here and say what??”
“I don’t know…” He confessed. “I just wish I knew what you were going through. I can’t help but feel responsible.”
“Well, maybe because you are responsible, Kelly!” You hissed back at him.
“I never forced you to do anything-”
“Ohhh, really…you’re pulling that card, hum?”
“I- I didn’t mean that…I’m sorry.” He sighed, rubbing his face as the conversation got out of control. “I’m sorry…for everything, Y/N.”
“Yeah, well, there’s not much you can do now…” You answered, tired of the conversation that just started. “I’m gonna be honest with you, Kelly. I have no intention of sticking around this firehouse. I’m a floater and I’m at peace with that. I just wanna do my job.”
The look on Severide’s face as you said those words made you frown. “What if there was something I could do about that? What- What if you could stay here?”
“Here? At 51? With you??” You asked incredulously. You couldn’t believe he was really saying this. “Kelly, I’m sorry, but this is the last place I wanna be.”
“Why? It’s not that bad…and I can see you’re already making friends.” He looked out the window and glanced at the blonde PIC.
You flashed a short smile at Brett. You, in fact, were making a new friend. Something you hadn’t done in a while, since you never stay in one place for too long. “I don’t know, Kelly…”
“Please, let me try…I can talk to Boden about it.” He sent you a soft smile. “That’s the least I can do.”
You rubbed your face and sighed. Maybe this was his chance of doing something right after all these years. Maybe this was your chance to plant your roots somewhere, make friends…make peace with your past.
Severide’s smile brought your attention back to him. “So…what do you say?” The lieutenant asked.
“Well, screw it. Let’s do this.” You smiled, forgetting the fight you had just a few minutes ago.
Severide extended his hand out, and you shook it. “So…we’re good now?”
“Hell no, don’t push it…” You pushed him back and walked out of the house with a soft grin on your face.
Severide watched you walk away with a smile on his face, his eyes darting to your ass just as you turned around and caught him red handed.
I loved you, you used me - Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Summary: As a floater, you're sent to the worst firehouse you could think of - the one where your ex is a lieutenant.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Paramedic!Reader
Warning: mentions of addiction.
Word Count: 1.8k
A/N: Sooo, after a few years without updating this page, here I am as if nothing happened. Sorry guys, life has been crazy. Just finished my degree in Physics and started my master's degree in Education. English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day/night and enjoy this! 💕
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"I'm telling you, man. I swear to God I've seen her before." Cruz tells Capp as they sit by the squad table. "I just don't know where, you know?"
"Yeah, I see what you're talking about." Capp agreed, resting his feet on the table. "Maybe she was an actress and we've seen her on television. I don't know."
The conversation caught Severide's attention, his eyes moved from the newspaper in his hands to the two firefighters. "Who are you talking about?"
"The girl in Chief's office," Cruz stated. "We've seen her before, but we don't know where."
"And here is the app floor!" Brett walked out of the firehouse with a smile on her face, showing you the rest of Firehouse 51. "Oh, and these boys right here are on Squad 3." She pointed at the men and flashed them a smile, not noticing the look on Severide's face.
The sight in front of Severide's eyes caught him by surprise. It's been years since he last saw you. He had so many questions. Where have you been? What were you doing here? Why was the girl he once used to date standing right behind Brett?
"Cruz, Capp, Tony, and Severide, this is Y/L/N. She's the new floater on Ambo 61." Brett introduced you to them as you flashed a shy smile, avoiding Severide's eyes the whole time. You knew one day you would have to face him again. But if you had a choice, you would never choose to work by his side. Not after everything you went through. But since you were sent here, all you wanted to do was leave the past behind you and do your job.
"Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you!" You walked to the table and shook their hands, one by one. At Severide's turn, you swallowed hard and looked down, not meeting his confused yet curious eyes as he firmly shook your hand. You'd be lying if you said you didn't miss his touch, the warmth of his skin.
"So, Y/L/N," Cruz spoke, making you turn around to face him. "Haven't we met already? Cause I'm pretty sure I've seen you before."
You frowned at his question, tilting your head to the side as you tried to think about it. "Huh...I don't think so..." You answered, knowing you two had met while you dated Severide, but since you wanted to forget that part of your life you didn't touch the subject.
-/-/-
After coming back from another call, you made your way through the app floor and went straight to the kitchen. You still didn't know where all the food and the utensils were, so it was taking quite a long time to make just a simple sandwich.
"For God's sake-" You mumbled, standing on a chair while you looked for a plate inside the kitchen cabinet.
"Need some help?" Severide's voice echoed through the room, making you lose your balance and almost fall from the chair. He rushed to help you but you quickly managed to steady yourself.
"No, I'm good." You shot back, not looking at him. Once those words came out of your mouth you noticed how rude you sounded, so you tried to repair it. "Thanks though." You quietly said, finally meeting his eyes.
"Anytime." He smiled, watching you go back to the counter to make your sandwich. "Can I ask you something?" He made his way to your side and leaned on the counter.
"Depends..." You answered, keeping your attention on the food in your hands. "If you wanna ask something about my past, go for it. But I won't answer it." You confessed, making Severide laugh.
"Seriously, Y/N. Why did you leave?" He asked either way. The way he sounded hurt almost made you feel sorry for him. "You always push people away. I just thought you'd never do it to me."
That, right there, was enough to make a switch flip in your head. "And why is that? Huh? Why do you think I pushed you away?" You shot back, putting your sandwich back on the plate as you stared at him in shock.
"What the hell's going on with you?" He frowned. "Seriously. What's going on? You've been treating me like shit since the minute you stepped inside this firehouse."
"You're unbelievable." You whispered. Looking back at the plate, you pushed it away and shook your head. "I lost my appetite." Before you could step away, Severide grabbed your arm.
"Come on, Y/N. What have I done to you?" His voice sounded genuine as if he didn't know all the hell he made you go through.
You let go of his hand on your arm, incredulously. "What have you done to me!?" You whispered-yelled, holding back the tears. "You used me, Kelly! I loved you, you used me. All you wanted was someone who could provide you with those fucking pills. I never meant anything to you."
"What!? No!" He quickly shook his head. "Y/N, I didn't use you. I was dating you because I liked you." He confessed.
"Look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't reach out to me because you needed those pills." You whispered, knowing your voice would fail if you tried to speak louder. The few seconds of silence coming from Severide said it all. He used you.
"I don't have the energy to fight you anymore." You confessed, stepping away. "I'll tell Boden I wanna be transferred to another house." Severide watched your back as you walked out of the room.
-/-/-
Walking inside the locker room, Severide greeted the firefighters from the last shift as they grabbed their bags to leave. As he got ready for his shift, he could hear the men chatting by his side, but didn't pay any attention - that’s until he heard your name being thrown in the conversation.
“Is that Y/L/N?” One of them asked, looking over the bunk room as you walked by. “I didn’t know she was working at 51 now.”
“I didn’t know they were accepting junkies.” The other one scoffed.
Severide turned around and grabbed the man’s arm before the group exited the room. “What did you say?”
“Hey, take it easy…it was a joke!” He laughed, freeing his arm from Severide’s hold. “We’re all friends here, there’s no need to get angry over this.”
Seeing Severide’s confusion, another man stepped in. “Rumors says she got caught stealing some pills from the ambo once, back at Firehouse 36.” He confessed. “...has been jumping from one station to another ever since.”
“When was that?” The lieutenant asked.
“Man, I don’t know…a few years ago.” He replied before leaving the room.
The new information took Severide off guard. He didn’t have to do the math, it was obvious that you got caught getting those pills for him. Of course you despised him, you have every reason to do so.
-/-/-
“Did something happen between you two?” Brett curiously asked as her eyes darted between you and Severide while you cleaned the ambo.
You looked over at the lieutenant sitting at the squad table and took a heavy sight. “Well, there’s no use in hiding anything from you, so…” you turned your back to Severide and faced Brett. “We…dated - if that’s even the right word - a few years ago.”
Brett gasped, then let out a short laugh. “Of course! I should have realised that! It was obvious by the way he’s always looking at you…”
“Oh, shut up!” You rolled your eyes. “It was a long time ago…a lot of things happened back then. We’re not on good terms.” You confessed, earning back a “spill the tea” look from your new friend. “He used me to get something he needed. He was desperate and I was stupid.” You glanced at the lieutenant, “...I got caught doing something for him and he wasn’t there to have my back.”
“Oh…” Brett sighed. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know he was an asshole.” She confessed, making you laugh. “And the asshole is walking over here, so let’s change the subject..”
You took a deep breath before turning around and facing the lieutenant. “Hey, can we talk?” He asked you with a strange look on his face.
“Humm…sure.” was all you could answer. You followed him inside the firehouse and waited for him to speak.
“You never told me you got caught getting me those pills.” He confronted you, catching off guard. “You never said anything. Why?”
All you could do was laugh. “Are you being serious right now?” You frowned, trying your best to keep your tone down. “Shit went down for me because of your fucking addiction! I almost lost my job! What did you want me to do? To come over here and say what??”
“I don’t know…” He confessed. “I just wish I knew what you were going through. I can’t help but feel responsible.”
“Well, maybe because you are responsible, Kelly!” You hissed back at him.
“I never forced you to do anything-”
“Ohhh, really…you’re pulling that card, hum?”
“I- I didn’t mean that…I’m sorry.” He sighed, rubbing his face as the conversation got out of control. “I’m sorry…for everything, Y/N.”
“Yeah, well, there’s not much you can do now…” You answered, tired of the conversation that just started. “I’m gonna be honest with you, Kelly. I have no intention of sticking around this firehouse. I’m a floater and I’m at peace with that. I just wanna do my job.”
The look on Severide’s face as you said those words made you frown. “What if there was something I could do about that? What- What if you could stay here?”
“Here? At 51? With you??” You asked incredulously. You couldn’t believe he was really saying this. “Kelly, I’m sorry, but this is the last place I wanna be.”
“Why? It’s not that bad…and I can see you’re already making friends.” He looked out the window and glanced at the blonde PIC.
You flashed a short smile at Brett. You, in fact, were making a new friend. Something you hadn’t done in a while, since you never stay in one place for too long. “I don’t know, Kelly…”
“Please, let me try…I can talk to Boden about it.” He sent you a soft smile. “That’s the least I can do.”
You rubbed your face and sighed. Maybe this was his chance of doing something right after all these years. Maybe this was your chance to plant your roots somewhere, make friends…make peace with your past.
Severide’s smile brought your attention back to him. “So…what do you say?” The lieutenant asked.
“Well, screw it. Let’s do this.” You smiled, forgetting the fight you had just a few minutes ago.
Severide extended his hand out, and you shook it. “So…we’re good now?”
“Hell no, don’t push it…” You pushed him back and walked out of the house with a soft grin on your face.
Severide watched you walk away with a smile on his face, his eyes darting to your ass just as you turned around and caught him red handed.
Summary: When Y/N has to choose between her boyfriend and her career, she chooses the last one, moving away to Sacramento. Five years later, Y/N is transferred to Firehouse 51 and has to work side by side with her ex-boyfriend, the man whose heart she broke.
Pairing: Kelly Severide x Firefighter!Reader
Warnings: alcohol, mention of death, panic attack.
A/N: Hey, guys! This was supposed to be a one-shot but I decided to turn it into a series. I'm planning on posting one chapter every Monday. English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. I hope you enjoy the series! 💕
Chapter One: The Reunion
Chapter Two: Sorry Doesn't Fix Everything
Chapter Three: We'll Work It Out
Chapter Four: You Have To Stay Awake
Chapter Five: Yes, A Thousand Times Yes!
Want to join my tag list? You can request it here!
A/N: English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day/night and enjoy this! 💕
Want to join my tag list? Send me a message! 🦋
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It felt a little strange. You couldn't remember when was the last time you had seen him or even heard someone mention his name. Yet he was here, face to face with you, after all those years.
"What are you doing here?" Severide asked. His voice brought you back to the present. By the look on his face, you could tell he was surprised. If it was a good surprise or a bad one, you couldn't tell. He’s always been really good at hiding his feelings. "I thought you had moved to Florida."
"I-I did." You smiled, nodding your head. "Couldn't get used to the weather, though." You confessed, earning a short laugh from the firefighter. You stared at him for a few seconds, lost in your thoughts, not knowing what to say next.
“So,” Severide tilted his head to the side. “What brings you back to Chicago?”. He curiously asked. “Don’t tell me it’s because of the weather.”
You laughed, then flashed a weak smile, looking at the paperwork in your hands. “Work, actually. A new school just opened up and they got in touch with me. Apparently they heard about the work I was doing down in Florida and wanted me to be part of their team.”
“That’s great.” Severide smiled. “I’m sure you're the best person for the job. You never loved anything more than teaching.”
The way he said it made your chest hurt. Your smile instantly faded away. “Kelly…” You took a step closer, trying to keep the conversation private. “Don’t do this. You know I loved you. Right?” You gently squeezed his arm.
“I know that.” He nodded, looking away before meeting your eyes again. "I know you loved me. I just don’t understand why you didn’t love me enough to stay."
The words caught you off guard. Before you could say anything back, he softly touched your hand on his arm and wished you goodbye.
A/N: English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. I hope you have a nice day/night and enjoy this! 💕
Want to join my tag list? Send me a message! 🦋
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It felt a little strange. You couldn't remember when was the last time you had seen him or even heard someone mention his name. Yet he was here, face to face with you, after all those years.
"What are you doing here?" Severide asked. His voice brought you back to the present. By the look on his face, you could tell he was surprised. If it was a good surprise or a bad one, you couldn't tell. He’s always been really good at hiding his feelings. "I thought you had moved to Florida."
"I-I did." You smiled, nodding your head. "Couldn't get used to the weather, though." You confessed, earning a short laugh from the firefighter. You stared at him for a few seconds, lost in your thoughts, not knowing what to say next.
“So,” Severide tilted his head to the side. “What brings you back to Chicago?”. He curiously asked. “Don’t tell me it’s because of the weather.”
You laughed, then flashed a weak smile, looking at the paperwork in your hands. “Work, actually. A new school just opened up and they got in touch with me. Apparently they heard about the work I was doing down in Florida and wanted me to be part of their team.”
“That’s great.” Severide smiled. “I’m sure you're the best person for the job. You never loved anything more than teaching.”
The way he said it made your chest hurt. Your smile instantly faded away. “Kelly…” You took a step closer, trying to keep the conversation private. “Don’t do this. You know I loved you. Right?” You gently squeezed his arm.
“I know that.” He nodded, looking away before meeting your eyes again. "I know you loved me. I just don’t understand why you didn’t love me enough to stay."
The words caught you off guard. Before you could say anything back, he softly touched your hand on his arm and wished you goodbye.
