UHHH
okay nobody panic but november happened to us
which means!!! however!! that it is time for the TAZ November Celebration to ride again! but i don't know about you, but things have been crazy for me. so we're going to keep it easy breezy this month while having some fun, and we're gonna enjoy the B.I.T.S.
BOOST, INDULGE, TREASURE, SURVIVE
here's the drill! you will have a BITS board! copy this one. then, every day, or alternately set time you spend fully focused, and then have a break before doing something else, you can give yourself a pin in the section you were working towards!
Boost: support another creator by commenting, making a recommendation post about, or doing something else to show another person some love for their excellent work!
Indulge: indulge in creativity with something you really, really enjoy. don't worry about a thing, just lose yourself in the joy that got you into fandom creation in the first place. maybe go back to a very favorite trope, or a contrived but delicious au, make a gift for someone you love to pieces, or only do the parts you like, but enjoy it!
Treasure: Spend time appreciating a work you already love. reread a fic that delights you, or reblog all of the art you can find of your favorite character, or something else that makes you feel like a dragon sitting on a pile of favorites. you can even just go back to your favorite episodes of the podcast!
Survive: sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. this time there are points for that! Every November i've done for this, something insane has happened, and it's always hard to take time to take care of yourself and not do the fun thing. but no more! if you take an evening to do nothing but eat cheese balls in your bathrobe (or something less fun and more vital to your continuing to live good) because that's where you're at mentally or otherwise, give yourself a pin for surviving!
FAQ:
q: How many pins can I get?
a: As many as you like/can fit/care to!
q: What do I use for "pins"?
a: any transparent image will work, or you can use something like the editing markup on your phone and add emojis, or draw something... if you need some pngs, check out @treasuregamble!
q: how will you know to reblog our posts?
a: tag this blog please! @taznovembercelebration
q: why this and not just rewards for making things every day of november?
a: because it's time to spread the love without terrorizing ourselves in the name of competition!
q: do we have to get all the BITS or can i focus all on one area?
a: try to get at least one set of BITS if you're going to participate, but it's fully up to you. i'm not your dad!
q: can i really have more than one pin in a day?
a: yes, but you have to take a proper break between switching gears. If you spend 8 hours in a fugue state writing a fic where a mermaid and a marine biologist go on a roadtrip to defeat a king and sleep in the same bed on the way, it only counts for one pin if you don't take a real break. cause i do care about your well being.
more questions? ask here
otherwise, see you on the dance floor! i can't wait to see all the pins you pick and great things you boost and make and enjoy!
Hey you! Yes you! It's the final day of @taznovembercelebration and I'm challenging you to celebrate some kind of TAZ fan content - commentary, art, fics, playlists, anything at all. Find someone who poured some love into something and celebrate their contribution.
Bonus points if you reblog so more of us can enjoy it too!
Happy @taznovembercelebration! I finally finished a fic I've been working on for ages.
Taako's busy with his ghost yeeting work, he doesn't have time to lose stuff, he especially doesn't have time to try and be nice to hot librarians who aren't cooperating. Chapter 1/7.
Read below or on Ao3 (where you can subscribe for updates if you want them.)
--
Taako stands, hands on hips, glaring hard at the various piles of clothes and books and the other detritus of life that’s strewn around his room. There’s no litter, just things, but not the thing. Sure, life might be easier if he kept his clothes hung neatly in the wardrobe, and his books on the shelf, and his other stuff in their stuff houses, but how else is he supposed to remember what he owns? He rips into the nearest pile again. It has to be somewhere. He was so convinced that he’d kept this one on the table in the hall - it didn’t seem likely that he’d bring an object like that anywhere near his other books, but it definitely isn’t out there, so in here it must be.
But it isn’t.
It really isn’t.
He’s checked high, checked low, levitated some stuff out of the way, found at least three items of clothing he forgot he had and one necklace he had given up on ever being reunited with, but no book.
Frustrated, exhausted, and cursing his past self for not taking Good At Being Tidy classes, Taako flops down into the pile of pillows and blankets covering his bed. He really needs to find it, but where the fuck could it even have gone? It’s not like anyone else has been in his bedroom recently, and no one’s been in their house apart from… oh.
“Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!” He shouts without raising his head. He waits, doesn’t hear any sound from the rest of the house, so tries again… a few times. The fifth one results in footsteps stomping his way loudly enough that Taako almost feels guilty.
His door flies open and Lup glares in at him. “You know how much I hate it when you do that, right?”
“Why else would I do it?” Taako asks, confused. “It means it always works.”
Lup sighs and walks over to flop on the bed with him, nudging him until he reluctantly wiggles over to make space. “What’s up? You look beat.”
“Can’t find my book.” Taako says to the ceiling.
“You’re gonna have to narrow it down, brother mine.” She gestures in the general direction of the book avalanche he accidentally set off in the corner while he was searching.
“The spooky one.”
“Uh huh, again, narrower please.”
Taako sighs. “The broken one.”
“The broken one, or the broken one?” Lup sits up and turns towards him, confirming exactly why Taako was reluctant to ask for help earlier.
“The haunted one, yeah, don’t make a big deal of it, s’fine probably. Cha’boy almost worked out how to fix it, just need it to check a thing and, well...” Taako waves his hand dismissively and crosses his everything that it means he can avoid the lecture.
He can’t.
“Taako! We literally had the ‘don’t lose the ghost book’ conversation! We made the ‘keeping it on the hall table or in the lab rule’ remember? There was an entire plan to avoid literally this exact situation!”
“You made the rule.” He’s being churlish, but fuck it. She’s not the boss of him, he’s not a petulant child. He’s a grown wizard, a responsible magic user, who just so happens to not be able to find a haunted book right now.
“You agreed to follow it! Plus, you were the one that started it with the whole no fire magic outside of the kitchen rule you made for no reason.”
“Uh huh.” Taako had, in fact, started it. He started it because he thinks it’s incredibly reasonable to not want to constantly worry about your house burning down around your ears, especially when it has taken you a hundred fucking years to get to a point where you have an actual house no one can take away from you so you can finally stop worrying about ending up begging spare rooms or living in the woods again. It also wasn’t an unfounded worry, there was the curtains incident, and the comforter incident, and the couch, the shower, and the short lived bed canopy too. His ‘Days Without Fire’ sign was never higher than 4 and the neighbours complained about the smoke alarm. His thing was different, this was just a little book with a little spook, and okay, yeah, the spook might actually have been a little… lottle spookier than Taako anticipated, but how was he supposed to know that in advance?
“So where did you last see it?” Lup asked.
“If I could remember that, I’d know where it was, wouldn’t I?” Taako knows he’s being a brat, and knows he needs to stop, but he simply doesn’t want to. He’s gonna have to make Lup apology pancakes at this rate because as much as he wants to blame someone else, this isn’t Lup’s fault. She’s trying to help because he literally asked her to. It’s not her fault he feels like the embodiment of chewing tinfoil right now, but when you factor that in, he’s actually he’s being pretty nice (if you squint).
“Humour me.” Lup levels him with a look that doesn’t leave any space to argue.
“On the table in the hall, where we agreed it would stay.” He can’t resist a little sprinkle of spite.
Lup does her pondering face. “Interesting. So someone’s moved it? It wasn’t me, and it doesn’t seem like it was you. Can it move itself?”
“Only a little. Popping open, a short hover. It couldn’t have gone far.”
“Has it ever moved anything else?”
“Not yet, that’ll be later. It mostly just yells at me.”
“Wait, what?”
“Not out loud, but, you know, I got the vibe.”
Lup sighs and rolls her eyes. “Okay, so when did you last have it?”
“Three days ago before I went to the scary meeting with corporate.”
There is a long pause. Taako glances over to Lup who looks back at him in horror. “The hall table, you said?”
“Once again, Lulu, you said. But yes. Hall table.” Taako feels his hackles rising and tries desperately to soothe them back down. It’s not Lup’s fault, it’s not Lup’s fault, it’s not Lup’s fault. Although, actually, she’s doing the squinchy face. “Wait, what did you do? Did you take my spook book?”
“I didn’t take anything!” Lup won’t look him in the eye.
“Lup! What happened?” Taako uses the voice he saves for errant students.
There’s a moment where he thinks she’s going to resist, then the fight goes out of her. “Well… so… you see. Magnus…” She begins.
“Magnus? You let Magnus in the house near my ghost book? Lup!”
“...he said he was dropping his and Julia’s books back to the library, and he knows it’s kinda out of the way and that I’m busy with work and school and Barry, so he said that he could just take mine too and I thought that was really nice actually…” Lup rambling is never a good sign.
“... and then?” Taako narrows his eyes suspiciously and tries not to bite.
“It’s just so kind, really thoughtful of him to do that. The library’s a bit out of the way and it can be really tricky to go when you have the car and the due date was coming up…”
Taako can’t bear it. “Where did you leave your books for him to collect?”
Lup hesitates.
“If it’s the hall table I swan to John.” Taako feels a headache starting.
“It… well, it might… it could possibly have been the hall table.” Lup says.
“Lup!”
“But they were on the other side! They all had library stickers on them! It was obvious.”
“Obvious to you, or obvious to Magnus?”
“Obvious to… fuck.”
“But surely they wouldn’t have taken it? It wasn’t a library book. They’d just have given it back, right?” Surely Magnus just has the book in his truck or something.
“Already ringing Magnus.” Lup says, as she taps at her phone. He finally answers on the third try and Taako’s trying really hard not to sink his fingers into the walls and climb up to lurk in a dark corner of the ceiling or something. Ceiling Taako definitely wouldn’t have to deal with this bullshit.
“Mags! Hey! Quick question… cool, oh, yeah, another new puppy? That’s great, when do we get to meet th…” Taako’s going to kill her, he’s going to kill her dead and no jury could convict. He settles for nudging her gently with his elbow instead because he’d miss her… eventually. “... sorry Mags, actually, I have to be quick, you know how some people can be…” She levels a glare at Taako. “Yes, of course I will, Taako, Magnus says hi.” Taako’s going to eat them both. “Uh huh, look, it’s about the library books, was there one which they didn’t take? … Oh, uh huh, you, you told him he must have made a mistake and that he needed to take it? … and… uh huh… uh huh… then refused to take it back… uh huh… and after that you just left… even when he shouted at you to come back? … uh huh… Magnus! ….uh huh, yeah, gods… fine. Gotta go, love you bye.”
Lup hangs up the phone and looks solemnly at Taako. “So, I have some news.”
“I have ears, Lup. Taako’s taking the car, don’t wait up I guess, I’ll yell if I need some backup cleansing the library or whatever the fuck I need to do to fix this. Keep your phone on and maybe get Barry on stand by? Spooky boy can earn his keep. Also, you’re never allowed to lecture me about being irresponsible ever again.”
Taako is out of the door before she can think of a reply.
okay so here are a few taz balance fic recommendations for @taznovembercelebration. starting off with some heavy-hitters- i have all of these ones tagged under #fics that changed me in my ao3 bookmarks. (my ao3)
these are all au fics!
An Echo, An Answer by Dooiney_Oie
it is a well-known fact about me personally that i love and have always loved ghost aus. like, fics where one character is a ghost. this fic is everything i've ever wanted in a ghost fic. every time i read it i notice more detail and foreshadowing. it is just a delight. (kravitz/taako)
All the Things You Prayed For by anonymousAlchemist, marywhale
this and every fic in the The Avenger Zone are life-changing. i know very little about the actual mcu so these fics ARE my mcu. i have read and reread and reread attypf so many times and i'll do it again. it's so good and so powerful and literally i think about it constantly. if there were a fandom specifically for these fics- that's where i'd be, y'know. i'm obsessed with them. please read attypf lmao. (kravitz/taako)
In the Pleasure of Your Company and I Have Seen the Fields Aflame by Desiree_Harding
i do not cry at fics often nor easily but both of these fics make me actually literally sob every time i read them, without fail. such beautiful explorations of grief, love and healing. both heavier reads but well worth it. catharsis in text. (first fic is kravitz/taako, second isn't ship-focused)
See You Later by blueshine
GODS, this fic is good. stolen century kravitz/taako au with a ton of lore and depth and EMOTIONS. i absolutely love the characterization in this one. 300k~ of ups and downs and adventures. lots and lots of feelings. (kravitz/taako)
these are just some off the top of my head that literally changed me forever and ever in a good way, but i got loads more fics in my bookmarks that i adore. i may post more recs throughout the month bc i'm having a real resurgence of feelings about taz balance and i just recently curated my bookmarks on ao3 so it's top of mind.
#thank you!!#i wanna see your pins you picked...if you're playing that part 👀👀
@taznovembercelebration oh for sure!!
i made my own pinboard, hope that's cool! i'm using chickens because they make me happy. i got two for indulge 'cause i've had a lot of fun working on a fic i'm writing for the past couple of days. i put one for boost for this post and then another for survive bc i had a doctor's appt today and i deserved a treat.
and here's a blank of my pinboard if anybody else wants to use it:
I've gone and written an absolutely wild, indulgent romp of a fic and you are cordially invited to enjoy it with me.
Read Time Enough At Last here!
Taakitz, M, 13.5 k
Summary:
There's no fantasy like being able to pause time and catch your breath. Kravitz would do anything for a break, and finds himself making a deal with Taako, a suspicious person that pauses time for him so he can finally rest and catch up on his hobbies. But Kravitz isn't alone for long, and ends up taking cooking lessons from Taako that lead to something else entirely. And then this fantasy gets a lot more fantastical...
Check the tags. Presented in two parts. The main story is the first chapter, and the second, which we will call the "tentacle supplemental", which is not required to read, but was a blast to write.
This was delicious and crazy to write! It started as a little thing to send some love to @noodyl-blasstal and became a great big bizarre delight treat. I hope you read it!
“Yes, well, consider me reamed,” Kravitz says, normally, like a normal fucking man, who knows how to talk to other guys and everything. He winces, and Taako laughs at him. “I mean- listen. I’m- I’m not exactly an interpersonal communications expert. Which I’m sure you gleaned, from the fact that I phrased it that way- ugh-” he runs his hands down his face as Taako snickers and begins preparing things for curry. “I’m good at rules, but people are tricky.”
“Especially when they don’t follow the rules,” Taako teases, thumbing at himself cheekily. “Yeah, I know, I catch you off-step. But you’re cute when you stumble.”
“I-” Kravitz can’t do this. “I’d prefer a waltz, you know, to beefing it.”
“Maybe we compromise.” Taako raises his hands magnanimously. “Beef waltz.”
“Beef-” Kravitz can’t help but laugh, and he tries to cover it, which only makes it worse, and Taako laughs too. “Beef waltz?”
“You know, your everyday, classic beef waltz.” Taako snickers.
Noodyl is a friend of mine 🎶but also an incredible writer! Here are a few fics of theirs you should go check out!
Best Served Cold
Istus's ice cream shop has some new shitty frozen yogurt competition from some new shitty frozen souls, but Edward and Lydia get what's coming to them! Absolutely sweet.
Disco Fish
Kravitz has a surprise gift, mostly. Taako will have opinions. I laughed so hard I almost barfed.
Astrology for Horse Jugglers
Taako and Kravitz entertain themselves at a party with bullshit, lies, and confidence. I think about this one twice a week.
Praise: funny, joyful, passionate, made with love. Enthusiastic and indulgent to the core. Noodyl knows what's up. Go check out these or many more of Noodyl's incredible works on ao3, or follow Noodyl @noodyl-blasstal on tumblr to get all the fresh hot flavors!
(And not that I did it for points, I'll brag about you any day, but with that I have two BITS! @taznovembercelebration! I hope lots of people join in the party!)
okay so here are a few taz balance fic recommendations for @taznovembercelebration. starting off with some heavy-hitters- i have all of these ones tagged under #fics that changed me in my ao3 bookmarks. (my ao3)
these are all au fics!
An Echo, An Answer by Dooiney_Oie
it is a well-known fact about me personally that i love and have always loved ghost aus. like, fics where one character is a ghost. this fic is everything i've ever wanted in a ghost fic. every time i read it i notice more detail and foreshadowing. it is just a delight. (kravitz/taako)
All the Things You Prayed For by anonymousAlchemist, marywhale
this and every fic in the The Avenger Zone are life-changing. i know very little about the actual mcu so these fics ARE my mcu. i have read and reread and reread attypf so many times and i'll do it again. it's so good and so powerful and literally i think about it constantly. if there were a fandom specifically for these fics- that's where i'd be, y'know. i'm obsessed with them. please read attypf lmao. (kravitz/taako)
In the Pleasure of Your Company and I Have Seen the Fields Aflame by Desiree_Harding
i do not cry at fics often nor easily but both of these fics make me actually literally sob every time i read them, without fail. such beautiful explorations of grief, love and healing. both heavier reads but well worth it. catharsis in text. (first fic is kravitz/taako, second isn't ship-focused)
See You Later by blueshine
GODS, this fic is good. stolen century kravitz/taako au with a ton of lore and depth and EMOTIONS. i absolutely love the characterization in this one. 300k~ of ups and downs and adventures. lots and lots of feelings. (kravitz/taako)
these are just some off the top of my head that literally changed me forever and ever in a good way, but i got loads more fics in my bookmarks that i adore. i may post more recs throughout the month bc i'm having a real resurgence of feelings about taz balance and i just recently curated my bookmarks on ao3 so it's top of mind.
UHHH
okay nobody panic but november happened to us
which means!!! however!! that it is time for the TAZ November Celebration to ride again! but i don't know about you, but things have been crazy for me. so we're going to keep it easy breezy this month while having some fun, and we're gonna enjoy the B.I.T.S.
BOOST, INDULGE, TREASURE, SURVIVE
here's the drill! you will have a BITS board! copy this one. then, every day, or alternately set time you spend fully focused, and then have a break before doing something else, you can give yourself a pin in the section you were working towards!
Boost: support another creator by commenting, making a recommendation post about, or doing something else to show another person some love for their excellent work!
Indulge: indulge in creativity with something you really, really enjoy. don't worry about a thing, just lose yourself in the joy that got you into fandom creation in the first place. maybe go back to a very favorite trope, or a contrived but delicious au, make a gift for someone you love to pieces, or only do the parts you like, but enjoy it!
Treasure: Spend time appreciating a work you already love. reread a fic that delights you, or reblog all of the art you can find of your favorite character, or something else that makes you feel like a dragon sitting on a pile of favorites. you can even just go back to your favorite episodes of the podcast!
Survive: sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. this time there are points for that! Every November i've done for this, something insane has happened, and it's always hard to take time to take care of yourself and not do the fun thing. but no more! if you take an evening to do nothing but eat cheese balls in your bathrobe (or something less fun and more vital to your continuing to live good) because that's where you're at mentally or otherwise, give yourself a pin for surviving!
FAQ:
q: How many pins can I get?
a: As many as you like/can fit/care to!
q: What do I use for "pins"?
a: any transparent image will work, or you can use something like the editing markup on your phone and add emojis, or draw something... if you need some pngs, check out @treasuregamble!
q: how will you know to reblog our posts?
a: tag this blog please! @taznovembercelebration
q: why this and not just rewards for making things every day of november?
a: because it's time to spread the love without terrorizing ourselves in the name of competition!
q: do we have to get all the BITS or can i focus all on one area?
a: try to get at least one set of BITS if you're going to participate, but it's fully up to you. i'm not your dad!
q: can i really have more than one pin in a day?
a: yes, but you have to take a proper break between switching gears. If you spend 8 hours in a fugue state writing a fic where a mermaid and a marine biologist go on a roadtrip to defeat a king and sleep in the same bed on the way, it only counts for one pin if you don't take a real break. cause i do care about your well being.
more questions? ask here
otherwise, see you on the dance floor! i can't wait to see all the pins you pick and great things you boost and make and enjoy!
And that's the month, folks! I've learned so much doing @taznovembercelebration, it's the first time I've done an event like this and I'm really proud I met my goal! It's been awesome seeing the great work everyone else has been doing! For my 15th and final entry, I got "silly," then drew "one" to get more direction. This was surprisingly difficult to get started with, and I tried a few ideas that I might develop later, but I'm really happy with what I made once I got going on the idea I liked! This one is a little ridiculous, and I tried to lean into the taakitz dumbass energy, which I hope I captured well.
Taako was never one to believe in unbreakable rules. Generally, he felt most rules, codes, and laws could be broken if you had a good enough reason. Sometimes you didn’t even need that. If he were forced to name any rules that he felt were truly unbreakable, he would have two: one, no matter what the recipe says, use more garlic. And two, when the Timewarp comes on your Spotify playlist, you do the fucking Timewarp. Yes, you had to do the moves, and yes, that included if you were in the middle of making a lemon cake with Swiss meringue buttercream.
Taako was thoroughly enjoying himself as he slid his Swiss meringue into the fridge to cool, then executed an enthusiastic jump to the left to gather his dry ingredients for the cake. He had a rare day off work, he was doing what he loved, and he could sing at the top of his lungs because he knew his downstairs neighbor wasn’t home yet.
He wiggled around in a circle with the dry mixture in his hands, belting out the end of the chorus.
“That really drives you insa- FUCK!” The bowl clattered to the floor as he turned around and saw someone standing in the door to his kitchen. Flour, sugar, and all the rest of it exploded over every surface, including the nice shiny shoes and perfectly-creased slacks of his visitor. It was Kravitz. Of course it was.
Taako scrambled to pull his phone out of his pocket and pause his music, his heart still pounding from the shock.
“Kravitz,” he gasped out, “I thought you worked till six.”
Kravitz, as always, looked perfect, with his handsome face and his all-black suit and his long dreads pulled up in a knot behind his head. He also looked completely stunned, which Taako couldn’t blame him for, since he’d just witnessed his trainwreck of a sing-along followed by a catastrophic baking failure.
“They just changed my schedule,” he said after a moment, his expression turning sheepish. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. Here, let me–” He stooped down to retrieve Taako’s mixing bowl–thank the gods he’d been using a metal one.
“Fuck, you don’t have to-” He was hot from embarrassment and itchy from his new flour coating.
Kravitz straightened up and set the mixing bowl on the table. He looked Taako over, eyes lingering a little, which Taako hoped was because he was wearing a very short pair of running shorts he’d had since high school, but was more likely because he looked like some sort of feral snow creature.
“I… are you okay?” Kravitz asked.
Taako nodded. “Yep! Right as rain, my dude! Right as grain? No, that’s nothing.” Kravitz laughed, probably out of pity more than anything, but at this point Taako would take it.
“I’m sorry I startled you.” Why did he get to have the softest fucking voice on the planet? And why was he allowed to direct it at vulnerable people like Taako, at this, the worst moment of his life thus far?
“Oh, I knew you were there,” he said with faux nonchalance, leaning against the refrigerator.
Kravitz raised his eyebrows. “You did."
“What, you didn’t like my little one man show?”
He grinned. “No, it was- it was really impressive.”
“You should see what else my hips can do.” He smirked as he watched Kravitz’s eyes go wide. He was definitely looking at the shorts now.
“I… um, I have your mail!” he announced. Gods he was cute.
Taako raised an eyebrow, having fun teasing him. “Are you holding it for ransom or something? Cause I’m not not into it.”
“No I-” he stopped. “Isn’t that a crime?”
He shrugged. “Crime can be hot.”
“Mail crime?”
“I prefer males, yeah.”
Kravitz snorted. “You’re the worst.”
“My kitchen’s covered in shit, I’ve earned it.”
“Anyway.” Not to be derailed this time, Kravitz pulled several envelopes from the pocket of his suit jacket. “Some of your mail got addressed to apartment one instead of apartment two again. Where should I put these?”
“Just find the least floured surface.”
“Right.” He set them down on the countertop nearest the door. “Can I help you clean this up since I helped cause it?”
Taako crossed his arms. “I told you, that was intentional. When they put me on Broadway I’m gonna use glitter.”
“Oh, fuck, that would be the worst,” Kravitz laughed.
“Gonna drop ten tons of it from the ceiling.”
“The cleaning staff would hate you!”
Taako was laughing too, now. “The whole fucking world would hate me, my man! The world’s first completely unifying issue: fuck that guy with the glitter!”
They took a moment to catch their breath, and Kravitz sighed. “Please let me help you with this.”
Taako waved a hand, dismissing the request. “Nah, the kitchen’s too small anyway. We’d just be bumping into each other.”
“That’s not such a bad thing.”
His heart lurched. He’d been flirting with Kravitz for weeks now, but this was the first time he’d taken the initiative. Was that… was there a chance he was interested? Not just flirting for fun?
“Maybe not,” he said, his mouth suddenly dry. “You are gonna want to change, though, it’s gonna be bad enough getting flour out of your pants.”
A grin spread across Kravitz’s face. “I’ll be back in a minute.” He turned and left the apartment, and Taako spent a moment leaning against the counter, just breathing.
He shouldn’t get his hopes up. Chances were Kravitz was just having fun, and so was he, but gods, Taako hadn’t felt like this in a while. Even longer since he’d fallen for someone this kind, or talented, or–
Taako pushed himself away from the counter and took a look at the mail Kravitz had brought him. That was a bill, that was a bill, that was a request for donations he couldn’t help with, bill— wait. Mixed in with the envelopes was a small sheet of lined paper, with a letterhead from the company Kravitz worked for. There were some messy notes scribbled on it in Kravitz’s handwriting.
He wasn’t going to look at it, just give it to Kravitz when he got back.
The notes were divided into an introduction, body, and conclusion. In the introduction section, Kravitz had written, “tell him what you like about him: handsome, funny, smart, great cook, nice to see every day.”
He should stop reading. This was clearly something private, and he didn’t want to intrude, or for that matter, have it confirmed that Kravitz was interested in someone else. Someone at work, it looked like, which was fine. Great, even.
“Taako, I think I–” Kravitz skidded into his apartment, wearing work jeans and no shoes, a panicked expression on his face. His gaze fell on the note in Taako’s hands. “Oh. You saw, then.”
Fuck. “Krav, I didn’t mean-”
“I just didn’t know how to tell you,” he said in a rush. “This… uh… wasn’t my top choice, though.”
Taako took a deep breath. This was fine. This was absolutely okay, and definitely not a collapsing five-tiered cake of a day.
“Hey, this afternoon hasn’t been great,” he said finally. “Do you want to just… have a do-over?”
Kravitz let out a sigh of relief. “That would be great, actually.”
Taako handed him the note. “So I didn’t see this, and you didn’t see…” he gestured towards the floury mess of his kitchen. “All that….”
He took a step back, brushed the worst of the flour off his apron, and said, “Hey, Krav! How was work?”
“Fine,” he said, biting back a smile. “How was your day?”
“There’s shit all over my kitchen,” Taako said.
Kravitz laughed quietly, then looked down at the note still in his hand. “Okay. Um, Taako, I think you’re handsome, and funny, and smart, and–”
Taako’s heart skipped a beat. Actually, it skipped several. To be completely honest, it felt like it jumped down a flight of stairs. “Wait.”
Kravitz looked up, alarmed. “Are you… I thought-”
“Are you asking me out?”
He blinked. “What did you think the note was about?”
Taako considered this for a moment. “I’d rather not say.”
“Okay, I’ll… try not to be concerned about that. Um, should I go on, or…?”
“Do you… is it like, important for you to finish, for self-actualization or something?”
Kravitz grimaced. “Honestly I’d prefer to just know. I kind of feel like I’m dying right now.”
“Oh! I mean, hell yeah, my dude! Let’s do it!”
“Okay!” Kravitz’s face lit up, and Taako could feel an answering grin spread across his own face. “We should, uh, probably get this flour cleaned up first.”
Taako snorted. “Oh yeah, cha’boy’s not dealing with that at midnight.” He cast a sidelong glance at Kravitz. “Or tomorrow morning.”
Kravitz’s eyebrows shot up. “Uh. Do you have a broom?”
30 days, 30 fics, and 45 884 words later, we've finally reached the end of @taznovembercelebration
Big shoutout and thanks to @ceilingfan5 for putting the whole thing together! It was fun! Also this is the only time i write nowadays alslfls
Anyway, here we go team, last one! Until next year 🫡
Day 30: missing pieces
It was the most fun Barry had ever had in school. He finally had real, actual friends who wanted to be around him and play games and talk about the things he liked. Sometimes, the twins would sit on either side of him as he read a book out loud. They said he was a very good reader.
Then, one day, they just vanished.
-
Barry met his best friends in elementary school, and then a few more times after that.
We made it! Day 30 of @taznovembercelebration which means I've written 30 fics in 30 days and had an absolute blast. Thank you to @ceilingfan5 for all of their hard work in organising taznc. I've had the best time rolling in the taznc tags.
Today's prompt was "three" and then I clicked until I got an AU which was "superhero". You can read below or on Ao3. Missed yesterday's? Catch up here!
-
Kravitz feels like he lives in the staff canteen now. He’s used to the ebb and flow of it, has managed to time his day around it. He makes sure he’s there to cover the stand at breakfast time, gets on with work until mid morning, and then sets up is ‘ask me anything’ sign again at lunch time. There’s no point in standing and smiling through the afternoon, no one’s really around. There’s three times a day, three chances to talk to people about what Kravitz could do for them, and three chances to get snubbed repeatedly and relentlessly.
The free pens had helped, but they’d cleaned him out pretty fast and no one had actually joined up. No one had even really made eye contact. He understood they were busy, a superheroes work is never done, yada yada yada, but that was exactly why unions were important. He and Sloane had worked really hard on the sidekick down time requirements, they shouldn’t be doing day shifts into nights without a proper break between and they definitely shouldn’t be working more than 40 hours a week - especially not fresh out of training. Supers shouldn’t really be doing it either, but there was a whole mess around ‘vocation’ and ‘voluntary’ roles which he and Sloane were still knee deep in resolving. It would help if the membership was representative and not just a few supers who joined up because their parents had always been members.
Kravitz cracks out a box of stress octopodes. There had been a slight issue with the stress ball order (he actually intended to get oranges), but the tentacles were comforting to squidge. Maybe that’d lure some people in for him, or, one specific person. A tall guy with a long blonde braid and seemingly never ending layers of clothes (maybe his super power was pockets?) had been eyeing Kravitz appreciatively all week. Well, he thought so… maybe that was conceited? The man might just be admiring Kravitz’s impeccable taste in tailoring… the attention had certainly encouraged him to dress more elaborately as the week went on. But he wanted to believe it was an interest in him, not just the way he was packaged.
Kravitz was hoping this was the day he’d finally be able to lure him in, the guy didn’t seem bothered by the pens. On Tuesday Kravitz had smiled when he caught the guy’s eye, but he just winked and then turned away before Kravitz could do anything else… Which was probably for the best because Kravitz had really only planned that far anyway. Your move, mystery man. On Wednesday he was fairly sure there was a little bit of flirting, the man came and took a card, but he took it realllllly slow. He wasn’t here yet today, but he tended to show up for the mid-morning coffee rush so Kravitz wasn’t worried. Any minute now. Sometimes he had company but mostly he was on his own (and seemed relieved about it.)
“Interesting choice of stress relief.”
Kravitz wishes he could say he didn’t jump, but he did. The fucking display board with all the union benefits blocked his view so whoever it was snuck up on him.
“Feel free to take one.” He puts a smile on and leans round the board to see the man. Ha! He knew a better freebie would do it.
“Nah, Taako’s good.” Says the man, drawing three into his rainbow cardigan so quickly Kravitz can almost believe he didn’t see it happen.
He’s wearing a ridiculous hat today, definitely not approved uniform. It doesn’t have any protective properties as far as Kravitz can see. The rest of his outfit isn’t much better, sleeves which are long and prime for catching on obstacles, and the many layers would be simple to grab and restrict his movement with.
“Okay.” Kravitz says, instead of lecturing him about theft or uniform code. Kravitz is cool, he’s hip, he’s sexy. He can break rules, he can take more than the one per-person approved freebie.
“So, what’s your handle, bones?”
“Bones?”
“Are you asking me why I’m calling that, or confused about your own name?”
“Kravitz.”
“That’s not a reply to either of the questions Taako asked you.”
“Sorry… I…” Shit, he’s fucking this up. He can pull it back round. “Question one, my name… er, handle…” He regrets it immediately, slang always sounds weird coming out of his mouth, cool people like Taako can tell he’s not made for it, he powers on anyway. “...is Kravitz. Question 2, where did bones come from?” Kravitz wants to know so he can make everyone else call him that too. His Mums use Kravitz without fail and Sloane alternates between Krav and ‘oi dickhead’, so this was nice.
“Nice to meet you Kravitz.” Kravitz starts to offer Taako his hand to shake. “But why the fuck are you here?”
Oh. He didn’t anticipate this. Kravitz’s hand drops limply back to his side. He belatedly tries to pretend he was stretching and watches Taako’s mouth twitch. Thankfully he controls the impulse to laugh because Kravitz is fairly sure he’ll melt into a puddle if Taako laughs at him right now. He’s doing such a bad job of marketing the union that his presence is being questioned and he’s not exactly known for responding well to criticism of his performance.
“Union stuff.” He says, just about keeping his voice even.
“You’d have more luck next door.” Taako indicates his head.
“What?”
“Well no one here cares.”
“You don’t care?” Kravitz desperately wanted Taako to care.
“Oh no, Taako cares.” Taako provides another lingering look. “Taako is very invested in you.” There’s a pause. “...r union.”
“Are you a member?” Kravitz perks up. Maybe he can get another sign up. Maybe Taako will tell his friends and they’ll join too?
“Taako isn’t really here.”
“Uh…” Kravitz isn’t really sure how to break the news that he very much is. How could he steal an unfair amount of free stuff if he wasn’t? “You, you are actually here though… you know?” Before he can consider how inappropriate it is he reaches out and prods Taako’s arm. “See.” Fuck. That probably wasn’t a great sales technique.
Taako’s looking at him like he’s lost his grip on reality. Is he hallucinating? Did he get bored enough that he just invented a man to look at? Is he currently talking to himself in public?
“No, Taako’s not here if you get my drift.” Taako raises an eyebrow and looks very intently at Kravitz like he should be able to make sense of it.
Kravitz can’t.
“Oh, I see.” He says and nods sagely. Because admitting that he doesn’t know something is physically painful for him. He’s working on it, it’s fine.
“Good, I knew you were cool. Come on then.” Taako gestures for Kravitz to follow him.
Kravitz does, nothing’s going on here anyway, he can’t bear to overhear Captain Neverwinter banging on about politics again either. It makes him feel slightly murdery. It’s fine. He's working on that too. He’ll probably figure out what Taako meant from context clues, plus, if he gets new sign ups then Sloane won’t even pretend to be angry about him leaving his post.
Taako strides down the hallway, Kravitz is grateful that his long legs help him keep pace. He and Sloane aren’t allowed to come this way, the front entrance is only for the big name heroes, so they just use the lift in the staff entrance when they run the promotional events. He concentrates on keeping his head down and keeping up, he’s not entirely sure he’s authorised to be here.
“Taako was pretty sure you’d be game, so cha’boy got you approved for next week. It’ll be better than the snoozefest over that side.”
Maybe there was a second canteen where all the hip young heroes who cared about workers’ rights hung out.
“Here we go!” Taako turns down a dimly lit corridor. The lights flicker ominously.
“This one?” Kravitz asks tentatively. There was probably some kind of form someone needed to fill out about this.
“Natch.” Taako says and offers his hand. “I’ll hold your hand if you’re scared.”
Kravitz definitely isn’t scared, he grabs hold anyway.
Taako’s warm and comforting and rubs a steady thumb across his knuckles. It’s nice, soothing. Kravitz could get used to this.
They reach a door all too quickly, but Taako doesn’t let go, he just scans his pass, then there’s a thumb print, retinal scan, and some kind of situation where he whispers into a box. Kravitz isn’t trying to keep track, he’s too busy trying to work out if this means Taako’s important, like really really important. Is Kravitz being taken to the management corridor or something? Shit… maybe they didn’t have permission to be there that week? Sloane said she did the paperwork, but maybe there’s been a mix up? Kravitz can’t be in trouble, he’s not emotionally robust enough to handle a disciplinary meeting without getting bitchy. Sloane’s warned him plenty of times.
On the other side of the door everything’s different. It seals quietly behind them, just a series of hisses and clicks letting Kravitz know that he definitely won’t be able to turn round and go back the way he came, which he should do, because apparently Taako’s somehow taken them to the supervillain lair? On purpose? He had the pass… Shit.
“Are you bad!?” Kravitz blurts out.
“Is this a roleplay thing? Taako didn’t think we were there yet, but I can be a bad, bad boy if that’s what you need?” Taako looks excited enough that Kravitz feels bad delivering the follow up.
“No, evil-bad!”
“Well I’m not a super, am I?” Taako barks out a single laugh as if the notion was ridiculous.
“What? You were in the canteen!”
“There’s no way cha’boy could be that conceited. It takes too much effort. Taako was just scoping the coffee situation, then he found something nice enough to look at that it kept cha’boy coming back for more.” Taako looks pointedly at Kravitz.
“But… I didn’t recognise you!” Taako can’t be a supervillain, Kravitz would have seen wanted posters, he would have seen him on the news, like Kreigan, Queen Quynh, or Dr Diomed. There was wanted posters for them everywhere!
“Well I’m not exactly going to do crime dressed as myself and visible am I?”
Huh. Kravitz had always wondered why some of them didn’t disguise themselves. “No… I guess that makes a lot of sense.”
“Anyway, this isn’t regulation, imagine the shit these sleeves would get snagged on?”
Taako has never been sexier.
“And the way someone could grab…”
“... my cardigans if I was turned away.” Taako finishes. Because he’s perfect.
“Uh huh.” Is about all Kravitz can manage because he’s busy staring at Taako with what is probably undisguised lust.
“Cha’boy’s all about health and safety.” Taako continues. “My mask is fun and functional.” His voice is dropping, getting richer, low and sultry.
“It’s important.” Kravitz nods to reinforce his point and swallows thickly.
“Anyway.” Taako starts as he sees something over Kravitz’s shoulder, then spins and lets go of Kravitz’s hand in one move. “Here’s the canteen.” He chivvies Kravitz into a large room full of rustic looking wooden furniture.
“Taako!” A tall man and a shorter grizzled one barrel through the door behind them, panting slightly as if they’ve been running. “Is this the guy from the shit canteen?”
“Taako has no idea who you’re talking about.”
“You know, the hot one… uh… what was he called… er… Kravitz!” says the tall guy.
“The Kravitz you’ve been talking about all week?” Adds the shorter man.
Oh, interesting. Taako has mentioned him! There’s no need for anyone to know how many times he may have talked about Taako this week in exchange. Sloane definitely hadn’t started a Taako jar to fund their monthly food truck foray. This definitely makes it slightly less embarrassing.
“Taako has never said anything to anybody in his life, now scram, this is business.”
“Hi, I’m Magnus Burnsides!” The tall man says and shakes Kravitz’s hand heartily. Not evilly. Interesting.
“The name’s Hightower. Merle Hightower.”
“No, it’s Highchurch.” Cuts in Magnus.
“Ssssh, I was using my alias.” Merle hisses back.
“We all have downsides to jobs we love.” Taako says. “And these are mine. Anyway, moving on!” Taako grabs Kravitz’s hand again and pulls him away from the others.
“Oooooh, they’re holding hands!” Says Magnus and raises his phone up. “Smile!” He yells.
Kravitz does, because he’s nothing if not good at following direction… well, most of the time.
“Lup’s gonna love this.” Magnus says happily.
“Can you fuck off now?” Taako asks.
“We’re nowhere near you!” Merle reaches out his stubby arms and waves them around. “See!”
Taako looks like he might implode. He turns to Kravitz. “Do you wanna go talk somewhere more private?”
“Oooooh! Talking.” Magnus sing songs, then taps away at his phone some more.
“Okay.” Kravitz says, he definitely isn’t opposed to being alone with Taako, although he’d also like to thoroughly quiz the others about exactly what Taako has said about him and whether it was good. It probably wouldn’t look good to throw Magnus his card.
“Taakitz! That’s the ship name for them. Magnus, tell Lup!” Merle tugs Magnus’ arm excitedly.
“On it!”
Taako’s mouth is slowly disappearing into a thin line. “We’ll go to my office.”
Kravitz lets himself be tugged along. He doesn’t care about which direction they’re going, he just wants to ruminate on the fact Taako talked about him. Taako talked about him a lot!
“Okay handsome, let’s get the important thing out of the way, do you wanna bone down with Taako?”
Kravitz very much does want to bone down with Taako. First he’d like some more time to take in the abject horror of his office because it shouldn’t be possible to get this many things in this small a space or for all of them to be different colours, but he manages it. The couch does, however, look very comfortable. Well padded arms. “Yes.”
“Excellent. Point b, 2? Did I do some kind of number or letter system? Fuck it, it doesn’t matter. Villains are a better market for union stuff. Hench people need caring for and most people consider it, we’re not monsters, well, morally, but some of us could be better. Plus, the training programmes can be brutal and we need someone fighting our corner. Frankly, it’s long overdue.”
“Oh.” Says Kravitz, because he’s not sure why he didn’t think of this himself.
“Yeah. Exactly. Plus, I hear that when you join you get great deals on contents insurance and with the way the supers keep smashing up our fucking lairs we need it.”
“You do, we have a 42% off deal with Abvgal, but you can also get some cash back if you switch your premium mid-year and trust me, it’s usually worth it. Their staff are great, you can just use the summoning sigil and someone will get back to you super fast, you talk face and face and they can survey the damage there and then.”
Taako nods approvingly.
“Plus, the one everyone forgets, you get 15% off at Paloma’s.” Kravitz adds conspiratorially.
“As in Paloma’s with the scones?”
“As in Paloma’s with the scones.” Kravitz nods smugly.
“Well you can sign Taako up right now.”
“I’d love to.”
“Right after we…” Taako crushes his lips against Kravitz’s.
It’s stupid and it’s perfect. He’s going to get a new sign up, he’s going to get laid, he’s going to do something ridiculous like ask Taako to be his boyfriend. Kravitz kisses back, hard, you can’t say something stupid if you can’t speak. He’s a genius.
Kravitz barely registers the fact they’re moving until his knees connect with the sofa and he falls backwards into it, he doesn’t let go of Taako as he goes. It’s probably illegal to do this on the clock, but he technically hasn’t taken lunch all week so it’s fine. The feeling of Taako’s thighs bracketing his and his mouth moving against Kravitz’s is more than enough to convince him that the rules didn’t matter right now.
“Form?” Taako pulls his lips away briefly before Kravitz tugs him back in.
Kravitz pulls Taako closer with one arm, fiddles with his satchel with the other. Taako snakes a hand down to help depress the catch while he pulls it free then does something so sinful with his tongue that Kravitz abandons it completely.
“Pen?” Asks Taako, some time later.
Kravitz takes the opportunity to lick the column of Taako’s throat. The corresponding gasp fills him with pride. He did that. He could do that again. He does.
“Pen” He says, and presses Taako’s hand to his chest pocket.
Taako apparently forgets about the pen, instead, takes his time to run his hand liberally around the area. He squeezes appreciatively.
“Okay, so I just gotta fill this out?”
“Yeah, then we’ll be in touch.”
“I think we’re in touch right now.”
“That was appalling. I should leave right now.”
“You don’t want to though?” Taako asks, and there’s more concern in it than Kravitz would have thought possible. Taako’s some suave villain, he’s probably never not hooking up in his office, Kravitz is just lucky he found a gap in the schedule.
“No.” Kravitz says, and pulls Taako down so that he can kiss him softly, gently, reverently, exactly the way he deserves.
“Name.” Taako says and taps the pen against his lips. Kravitz is never going to be able to look at it again without thinking about this.
“Mmhm.” Kravitz says and nuzzles Taako’s neck as he scribbles.
“Date of birth.”
Kravitz kisses Taako’s collar bone.
“Address… trying to angle your way back to my place on the first date, interesting.”
“This is a date?”
“It could be.”
It could be!
“Can we have another one?” Kravitz asks.
“Another first date?”
“Yes, our first date, and then first date’s alias.”
“Sounds good, Taako’s in. You can choose, cha’boy sorted the location for this one.”
It’s the longest anyone has ever taken to fill out a membership form. Kravitz loves every second.
–
The week in the evil canteen is the most productive they’ve ever had, and not just because of the interest in the new man Blink’s been seeing. Their hench policy is set to be ready within the month and they’ve had to order more of the octopode stress tentacles.
Second last day!!!!! One more to go!!!! We're almost done @taznovembercelebration
Three guesses what this one's about (shocking no one, it's blups)
Day 29: musical
Lup's just trying to get the rust off her violin skills for the challenge the Legato Conservatory has posed them when she finds someone she didn't expect at a piano.
Read it on AO3
Lup's heading to one of the practice rooms in the Legato Conservatory's music building late one night to keep brushing up on her violin basics. One of the doors isn't shut completely, letting a sliver of light out into the darkened hallway along with muffled piano music. She stops to quietly pull the door shut, but pauses as she sees the pianist through the window.
Barry's eyes are lidded as he looks down at the keys, and his hands glide easily over the keys. It's a simple enough tune, but it's soft and sweet and beautiful. He has no sheet music, playing simply from memory. Lup stands with her hand on the doorknob, watching him. She doesn't want to interrupt him.
He finishes his song, and takes a deep breath, lowering his hands into his lap.
She opens the door slowly, “Barry?”
He jumps slightly at the sudden intrusion. “Lup?” He relaxes, “what are you doing here?”
She lifts the violin case. “Same as you, apparently. I didn't know you play piano.”
He sighs, running a hand lightly over the keys. “I don't, really. My mom put me in lessons as a kid to… build my confidence or something. I couldn't tell you the last time I touched a piano, even before the mission.”
“You sounded good.”
He smiles, still looking at the piano. “Thanks. I'm still really rusty, but I couldn't think of anything else to do for this.” He looks up at her, and nods to the case in her hand, “violin? I hear that's really hard to learn.”
She laughs sheepishly. “Yeah… one of the caravans Taako and I traveled with had a handful of bards. They said we'd get a cut of profits if we played with them, so I got one of them to teach me. Taako wasn't interested, he stuck with cooking.” Her smile grows as the memory comes back, “the one who taught me said I had “fiddling fingers” so,” she lifts the case again, “fiddle.”
“Fiddling fingers sounds inappropriate.” She barks out a laugh. Barry puts on a deep, gruff voice, “you could fiddle something with those fingers, young lady.”
Lup leans against the wall as she laughs, brushing tears away. “Oh my god,” she takes a deep breath, “I never thought about it that way.”
He makes grabby hands and in the same mocking voice says, “or maybe you want to try out my fiddle fingers.”
She clutches her imaginary pearls. “How dare you! Trin was a perfectly respectable and pleasant young man.” Barry laughs as Lup tuts and shakes her head. “I never thought you'd be one to disrespect the consumed.”
His smile fades slightly and his eyes drop back to look at the piano.
“Hey…” she puts her violin down and walks over to him, sliding her hands over his shoulders, “you okay? I'm just poking fun.”
“Yeah,” one of his hands comes up to cover hers, “I'm just…” he sighs deeply and his voice wavers, “my mom…”
“Oh, Bear.” She sits next to him and draws him into her arms. He drops his head onto her shoulder and wraps his arms around her, holding her close. She slides her fingers into his hair.
He doesn't cry, he's just silent for a while. She's learned by now that sometimes he just needs someone there. They've talked about his mom a lot. She was the only person he was leaving behind for the mission, and when he was finally comfortable enough with Lup, he started telling her everything he could remember. She's heard a lot of childhood stories. She loves learning about baby Barry.
When he withdraws from her, she brushes the back of her fingers against his cheek and cups his jaw, bringing him in to rest their foreheads together. “Feeling okay?”
“Yeah,” he says softly, his eyes closed. “Sometimes it just hits harder.”
“I know.”
“It was a lullaby. The song I was playing. She used to sing it to me, it was the first thing I ever learned on piano.”
“Will you play it for me?”
His eyes open, and she gets lost in the ocean of them as they meet hers. “Okay,” he whispers. He sits up and turns back to the keys. He takes a breath, then starts to play. After a few measures, he starts singing quietly. Lup's heart swells. She wants to link her arm with his and rest her head on his shoulder, but she doesn't want to mess him up. She presses closer to him, his warmth seeping into her where their sides touch.
It's when he finishes that she slides her arms around his middle and leans her head on his shoulder. “Beautiful,” she says.
He lifts his arm over her and settles it around her shoulders, pulling her into his side. “I'm not much of a singer.”
“I like your voice. I'm sure it could soothe a baby to sleep.” She's long since stopped trying to force away the image of Barry with a tiny baby half elf in his arms that comes to her in moments like these.
She can hear the smile in his voice, “you think so?”
“Mhm.” She closes her eyes. “In fact, it's soothing me to sleep right now.”
“I don't think so,” he jostles her lightly, “you've got fiddling to do.”
She giggles. “I know something I'd like to fiddle.”
She doesn't need to look at him to know he's rolling his eyes. “Come on, you need to practice.” She stays firmly in place. “I played for you, it's only fair you play for me.”
She groans and laboriously tears herself away from him. “Why do you have to be so logical?” She crouches and opens up her case, taking out the violin. “What do you want to hear?”
He shrugs. “Anything.”
“I don't know any classical stuff. We only played in taverns and town squares.”
He laughs, “that's okay. Play me your favourite.”
She puts her bow to the strings and says, “you asked for it.”
She plays an upbeat tune with dirty lyrics that always got crowds going in taverns and made her teenage self giggle when she'd sing it. By the time she's finished, Barry's roaring with laughter. He gives her a standing ovation.
“I think you should play that for your submission.”
She snorts, putting the violin away. “I think the professor helping me would have an aneurysm if I did. She almost popped a vein in her forehead when I kept calling it a fiddle.”
He sits back down. “Lame.”
“What are you going to play?”
“No idea. I thought about maybe trying to expand the lullaby? Make it more complex or elegant? But I don't want to risk losing it, you know?” Lup has an idea. She chews on it for a moment. Barry notices her gears turning. “What?”
Day 29 of @taznovembercelebration, one more day to go! Today's prompt was "ignore" and you can read it below or on Ao3. Missed yesterday's? Catch up here!
-
“You’re gonna have to kill me, Lup. I’ve had a good run, I’ll miss you most of all, but we all knew this is how it would end. It’s what I would have wanted.” Taako opens his arms wide and waits for Lup to stab him through the heart with her handy dandy kitchen sword or whatever weapon she has on hand. Tenderising mace?
“Hello Taako, lovely to see you too, why yes, I did have a great day, thank you for caring, brother mine. It’s so touching that you’re so interested in my life.” Lup grins infuriatingly instead of murdering him where he stands. Rude.
“C’mon!” Taako keeps waiting.
“You’re sure this is what you want?”
“Positive.”
Lup strides towards him, kitchen scissors in hand.
“Wait no! Taako wants to live, nevermind.” He tucks his arms around his chest and makes himself as small as possible. It turns out his survival instinct is strong. Who knew?
Lup wraps her arms around his ball of self-preservation, scissors discarded on the counter. “That’s what I thought. Wanna tell cha’girl what’s going on?”
“Taako’s fine, great even!” He doesn’t know why he’s even bothering to lie, but it drips out easily.
“Uh huh.”
Not necessarily believably.
“Yuh huh.”
“Is it Kravitz?”
“He only cares about dead people.”
“And you’ve decided this because?”
“He’s always hanging out with them.”
“It’s his job, KoKo, and he’s not so much ‘hanging out’ as ‘preparing them for their funeral’. Slight difference.”
“Not when it involves not going out with Taako.”
“Did you actually ask him this time?”
Taako hesitates. “I see how it is, you ask ‘did you ask him Taako?’ and not ‘shall we go and tell that bastard off, Taako’?” This isn’t the support Taako deserves.
“I’ll take that as a no.”
“I did ask him!” Taako’s indignant now, how dare she not believe him?
“How?” Lup says and raises an eyebrow in the way that means she’s full not going to pander to any of Taako’s bullshit.
“Does it matter?”
“Yes.” Lup stares into his soul.
Taako gives up. “With my eyes.”
“You fucking what now?” Lup’s mouth is a firm line and she’s breathing deeply through her nose.
“I did the thing. You know.” He flaps his hand dismissively.
“Show me the thing?”
“You know the one, the thing.”
“I don’t, remind me.” Lup’s tone leaves no room to argue.
“You might fall in love with me and that’s illegal pretty much everywhere.” Maybe the cold hard truth will shock her out of unreasonable demands.
“Taako!”
“Fine.” Taako gives Lup his most soulful eyes.
“Fuck, I’m in love with you.”
“I warned you! Shit! You have to leave the house, not me, it’s not cha’boy’s fault.” He’ll miss her, but it’ll wear off within the year probably.
“Oh wait, no, hang on, that’s not love, that’s a deep confusion about what the fuck you were just doing with your face.” Lup’s mouth is twitching and Taako knows she’s trying to hold a laugh in. How dare she? This is serious!
“It’s not funny.”
“It’s a bit funny, Ko.”
Taako scowls. He scowls hard. Double hard in fact!
“Let's go over the facts. Here…” Lup points to the sofa. “... you go sit down, I’ll get us a drink, and we can talk it through.”
Taako flops obediently on the sofa, but ragdolls as much as possible. If he lists sadly enough to the side Lup might not decide to use facts against him.
“Move.” She says, nudging him with her toe.
Taako flops the other way, then straightens up again when he realises she’s sacrificed some of her fancy bitch presse stash for him.
Lup rolls her eyes, hands him the cup, then sits down onto the other side of the sofa and draws her legs up under her.
“So you want to ask Kravitz out.” It’s a statement, not a question.
Taako takes a long sip of his drink, decides he may as well just go with it. “Yes.” He answers anyway.
“And you’ve been seeing him three times a week for the last two months?”
“When he’s not hanging out with the dearly departed instead.”
“Yes, we’ve covered that.” Lup unfurls a leg to nudge him with her foot. “Stay on topic. So you’ve been hanging out?”
“Yes.” Taako could say more, he could say a lot more, but he’ll try and stick to the questions so she doesn’t bully him further.
“Going to dinner together?”
Taako nods.
“Sleeping over at his house sometimes.”
“Once or twice.”
“How many rooms does he have?”
This is a trap. “One.”
“Huh.” Says Lup, but doesn’t press any further.
“And on these ‘friend hang outs.’” Lup does quote marks with her fingers. “...would you say you’ve been asking him out with your eyes?”
“Yes!” Taako’s glad she gets it.
“And he hasn’t reciprocated?”
“No.” There’s no need for her to rub it in.
“Not even with his eyes?”
Taako pauses. Fuck. This was a trap in a trap. The ol’ double trap fake trap trap. If he doesn’t answer she can’t get him.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought… Taako, I have a novel idea.”
Taako keeps his mouth shut. Inclines his head. He can’t be arrested for that.
“Why don’t you try asking him with words?”
“Gross.” Taako wrinkles his nose.
He could swear Lup growls slightly under her breath.
“Why?”
“Because then he could say no!”
“So your plan is to be a corpse?”
“He likes spending time with them.”
“Uh huh. And how are you going to enjoy that time together if you’re dead?”
This @taznovembercelebration story was brought to you by my firm belief that Angus McDonald should be able to roast every adult in the TAZ universe at least once. My card for this one was "vampire AU," so I had some fun playing around in a deeply unserious vampire space.
Kravitz first noticed the boy watching his apartment in late autumn. He always showed up a little before sundown, so Kravitz wasn’t sure if he had just started this behavior or if he was just noticing it now that the sun set before he left for his shift at the bar. He was a strange little guy, always clean and well-dressed, with big round glasses that he was constantly pushing up his nose. He kept a journal with him that he was always scribbling in, though Kravitz couldn’t guess what he was writing.
His first clue to the boy’s intentions came in early December. He had just closed and locked the door to his apartment, giving the boy an awkward little nod as usual, when he saw an older woman striding purposefully towards him.
“Angus McDonald!” she exclaimed, strained worry in her voice. “What on Earth do you think you’re doing?”
Kravitz took this as his cue to be on his way. As he turned the corner he heard Angus hush the woman frantically.
“I’m investigating the vampires!” he hissed, probably a little louder than he intended. Kravitz laughed to himself on his way down the stairs. It was nice to know his gothic flair was being appreciated. It had been a while since someone had accused him of vampirism, though. Clearly the kid had a big imagination.
The next time he saw Angus, he decided to introduce himself, and maybe lay some of his fears to rest.
“Hey,” he began, “you’re Angus, right? I’m Kravitz.”
Angus eyed him suspiciously for a moment, then stuck out his hand. Kravitz took it, a little surprised by his grave professionalism as Angus shook his hand with a carefully-calculated amount of eye contact.
“Nice to meet you, sir.”
“Listen, Angus, I just wanted to let you know, while I might enjoy borrowing some vampire aesthetics, I’m not actually-”
“I’m ten years old, sir,” Angus said, with barely-concealed irritation. “I know what goths are.”
“I- oh.” Kravitz did not spend enough time with kids to know how to handle this.
“And you’re not the one I was talking about, sir. It’s them.” Angus inclined his head towards the apartment next to Kravitz’s with a wary expression on his face.
Kravitz frowned. “Them? Well, I haven’t seen them around much since they moved in, but it seems a little extreme to jump to conclusions like that.”
Angus shook his head. “But I’m not jumping to conclusions, sir. This is the result of months of careful reconnaissance. Let me review the evidence.” He flipped open his notebook. “First, they never come out during the day. I’ve tracked this very carefully since August and they have never left their apartment before sundown. They even moved in at night.”
Kravitz thought about it. That was unusual, and certainly explained why he didn’t hear them moving in. But still, vampires?
“Lots of people have jobs they go to overnight,” Kravitz offered. “Like me, for instance. Maybe they have jobs like that.”
Angus gave him a pitying look as though Kravitz had just tried to explain that two plus two equals six. “That may be true, but even people who work a night shift come out during the day sometimes. It’s unavoidable since our society is set up with the assumption that people are diurnal. People who mostly come out at night may be common enough, but people who only come out at night have a reason to avoid the day.”
“Okay, you may be right there, but vampires? It still seems like a bit of a leap.”
“I have more evidence, sir!”
“Of course you do.”
Angus flipped to another page in his notebook and scanned it for a moment. “When they moved in, they had two large boxes with them that were just over six feet long. By my estimation, these boxes were exactly the right dimensions for a pair of coffins or caskets. I also examined the floor outside their apartment that night and found traces of dark, sandy soil, which doesn’t match the soil in the complex. It’s my belief that this was grave dirt that fell from their coffins during the move. Furthermore, if you look up at their windows from the courtyard, it appears that they’ve covered them in black plastic or a similar light-blocking material.”
In the midst of this head-spinning rundown, Kravitz found the time to wonder how often Angus looked through apartment windows from the courtyard, and reminded himself to close the curtains during his next impromptu lip-syncing session.
“I have other tests I’d like to run,” Angus continued, “but they would require more direct contact with the subjects, and I’m understandably a bit wary.”
Kravitz stared down at him. “That’s certainly…something…. But what would you do even if you did find out they were vampires? Try to stake them?” He might have to warn his neighbors to be on the lookout for a kid running around with a wooden stake and a crucifix, although he figured Angus wasn’t likely to follow through on such a plan.
Angus shook his head emphatically. “No, sir! As far as I can tell, they don’t seem to be a danger to the community, and I think vampires, if they do exist, have just as much of a right to live as anybody.”
“So why bother investigating at all?”
“To get to the truth!” He said this like it was entirely obvious. “Besides, if vampires exist, think about the implications! We might be surrounded by all sorts of fantastical beings and phenomena that we just don’t know how to look for yet! Wouldn’t you like to know if that was the case?”
Kravitz had to hand it to him, the kid was convincing. “You know, Angus, I suppose I would. Tell you what. I’ll keep an eye out, and let you know if I see anything strange. Just try to stay out of trouble, okay?”
Angus extended a hand again and Kravitz shook it, bemused. “It’ll be a pleasure working with you, sir. Now if you’ll excuse me I have some cross-referencing to do.” He turned and started back towards his own apartment, leaving Kravitz feeling like he was somehow Angus’s sidekick now.
~~~~~
Saturdays were some of the worst nights at the bar, and this one was no different. It was nearly four a.m. before Kravitz dragged himself back to his apartment building, and he couldn’t face the stairs to the fourth floor. Instead he waited for the elevator and slumped against the railing when it arrived. The doors were just sliding shut when he heard someone shout to hold the elevator. He lunged for them, just managing to get his hand between them before they closed completely.
The doors slid open, revealing one of the most beautiful people Kravitz had ever seen. He had long blond hair tied back in a thick braid and eyes sparkling with mischief and ringed with glittery silver eyeliner. He was wearing an incredibly fluffy-looking knitted sweater and holographic platform boots, plus at least three separate statement necklaces. His earrings were made of bubblegum pink plastic and shaped like deer skulls.
“Thanks, my man,” he said as he stepped into the elevator. “Cha’boy was not going to do those stairs tonight.” He grinned, revealing a gap between his front teeth, and Kravitz felt his face heat up instantly.
“No problem,” Kravitz managed to get out, having already turned off the part of his brain responsible for socializing when he left the bar. “What floor?”
“Fourth. Oh! You too, huh?”
Kravitz nodded. He didn’t think he’d seen the man before, but that was hardly surprising considering the hours he kept with work. He’d certainly like to see more of him, if at all possible.
“Fellow night owl?” he asked, hoping he could somehow turn the conversation in the direction of their respective activities, and then activities they could do together, and then a date and time they could plan for those activities.
The man smiled again, softer this time. “You could say that. I’m Taako.” He extended a hand heavily adorned with costume rings.
Kravitz took it with an answering smile. He was surprised to find that Taako’s hand was even colder than his own.
“You’re freezing,” he noted. “Are you alright?”
Taako wrinkled his nose. “Poor circulation. Maybe you could help with that, handsome.” He winked, and Kravitz felt his knees turn to jello.
“They say exercise can help,” he said, still feeling out the space a little.
“Ooh, I’d love to get your heart racing.” He looked Kravitz over, clearly taking his time, and it suddenly felt incredibly warm in the elevator.
“I think you already did,” Kravitz said, truthfully. Nothing wrong with his circulation, that was sure.
Taako laughed, sounding genuinely delighted, and Kravitz’s heart leapt. “I’m sure we could think of some other things that would work, too.”
The elevator dinged before Kravitz could reply, and they both stepped out onto the fourth floor.
“This one's mine,” Kravitz said ruefully, gesturing towards his door.
“What a coincidence. Looks like you’re right next door.” Taako took out a key ring that was more novelty keychains than actual keys and unlocked the door to Angus’s suspected vampire nest.
Kravitz couldn’t help but laugh. He couldn't imagine anyone who looked less like a vampire than this sunny, freckled blond, even if he was almost supernaturally pretty.
“Well, now that we've met I can report your vampire status back to my superiors,” he quipped, realizing the moment he said it that Taako didn't have any of the context needed to make that not sound insane. A moment after that, he realized that, in the absence of proper context, Taako had apparently assumed that he was saying something awful. Taako’s inviting smile disappeared so quickly it seemed like he'd flipped a switch, and his eyes grew dark and flat. Before Kravitz could explain, or apologize, or really think, Taako’s hand closed around his shirt collar and he was being pulled into Taako’s darkened apartment.
Unable to clearly reconstruct the sequence of events that led to this moment, Kravitz found himself pinned against the back of the door, with Taako pressing one hand over his mouth and the other on the center of his chest. It didn’t hurt, per se, but there was enough pressure behind it to indicate that it could hurt, if Taako felt like it. Kravitz was having a lot of mixed and quite frankly contradictory feelings about this turn of events.
“Listen.” Taako's voice was quiet and carefully measured. “I'm not going to hurt you.” Kravitz found this hard to believe. It would be just his luck if his hot new neighbor turned out to be a serial killer or something. “I know you're not just going to stake us, cause then you wouldn't have said anything. So tell me who you're working for, and what you know, and then we can talk about a deal.”
Taako’s eyes looked strangely reflective in the dim candlelight of his apartment, almost like a cat's eyes. And was Kravitz seeing things, or did his teeth look longer and sharper than before?
No fucking way. If Angus had been right Kravitz was going to throw himself into the sea.
“I'm going to uncover your mouth, okay?” Kravitz nodded, as much as he could with Taako’s hand pressed against his face. In other circumstances he would have been enjoying this. Honestly, part of him was enjoying this, which probably said something about his self-preservation instincts, or how long he'd been single, or both.
Taako pulled his hand back, leaving the one on his chest. “Who do you work for, and what do you know?”
Kravitz swallowed. His mouth was uncomfortably dry now. “I work for The Astral, it's a cocktail bar downtown. And I know… well, apparently a lot less than I thought I did. Speaking of which, I'd actually like to go back to something real quick?”
He began to put his hands up, but as soon as his muscles shifted Taako pushed against his chest a little harder in warning. “Are you telling me you are actually a vampire? And you think I'm… what? Some sort of vampire hunter?”
Taako’s eyes went wide. Then his shoulders slumped and he let go of Kravitz. “Son of a bitch. You didn't know shit, did you?”
Kravitz shrugged apologetically. “If it helps, I see how you would have gotten that impression.”
“Fuck!”
“Taako?” Another voice came from around the corner and a woman in a long red bathrobe who looked startlingly like Taako appeared. “Is everything-” She broke off when she saw Kravitz. “Who's this?”
“Kravitz,” he introduced himself, at the same time Taako said “Nobody.”
The woman crossed her arms. “Getting some contradictory messages here, gang.”
“I live next door,” Kravitz offered. Now that it didn’t seem like he was in immediate danger, he was taking comfort from the fact that everyone else seemed just as clueless about how to deal with this situation as he was. “I think we had kind of a misunderstanding, and well….”
The woman turned to Taako. “Does he know?”
Taako winced. “You know, Lup, funny story about that….”
Lup rolled her eyes. “You told him, didn't you?”
“I thought he already knew!”
“Taako, I swear, if we have to move again-”
“I'm not going to tell anyone, if it helps,” Kravitz said.
She rounded on him. “You’re not going to tell anyone that you’ve just discovered bloodthirsty monsters living in your apartment complex?”
Kravitz raised an eyebrow. “I think you’re making some unfair assumptions about me. I haven’t seen any evidence that you’ve been hurting people, and if you were just mindless killers I have a feeling I wouldn’t be talking right now.” Gods, he hoped he was right.
Taako and Lup exchanged a thoughtful glance. Finally Lup shrugged. “You deal with this, Koko. I’m gonna go take a bath.” She headed back towards the hallway before freezing suddenly. “In water, and maybe a bath bomb. Whoever invented the whole “bathing in blood” thing did not know how coagulation works.”
She walked off, leaving Taako and Kravitz staring at each other.
“Can I… ask you a question?” Kravitz asked hesitantly.
Taako shrugged and sat down on the arm of the faded, floral-patterned sofa behind him. “Ask away, my man.”
“Where do you get the blood?”
He laughed. “Volunteer system, baby!”
Kravitz stared at him. “Really.”
“Scout’s honor!”
“And that fits the demand? I mean, there’s enough people who’d let a vam-” He stopped himself. “Okay, yeah, saying it out loud it makes sense.”
“Welcome to 2023, my dude. Everybody’s horny for vampires.”
Kravitz was in no position to dispute this.
Taako perched, birdlike, on the arm of the sofa, that mischievous light back in his eyes. “Okay, Taako’s turn to ask a question.”
“Go ahead.”
Taako squinted at him, contemplating. “What do you get out of it? Not telling anyone, I mean.”
Kravitz’s heart skipped a beat. “Dinner?” he said, before he could talk himself out of it. There were some things you just had to do for the sake of your depressed teenage baby goth self.
Taako smirked at him and climbed down from the couch, walking towards him with a sort of feline grace that had him mesmerized. “Oh, I’d love to have you for dinner, handsome.”
He blinked. Was that a threat or a come-on? Should he be more concerned about this?
To be clear,” he added hurriedly, “this isn’t some sort of blackmail thing, where I go find Dr. Van Helsing if you won’t go out with me.” Taako laughed, and Kravitz couldn’t help but smile as well. He already loved the sound. “I’d just… I’d like to get to know you a little better. It doesn’t have to be dinner, either, if that’s an issue….”
“I don’t know, I was really looking forward to sucking you dry.” His smile was knife-sharp, and probably just as deadly, as he continued towards him.
Okay, that one had to be a come-on, right? Surely. Right? Whichever it was, Kravitz was beginning to wish he was still pinned against the wall, just to give his legs some much-needed support.
“I-”
Before he could ask for clarification Taako grabbed his face in both hands and kissed him, rough and eager, pressing him against the back of the door.
“When’s your next night off?” Taako asked when he pulled back, a little breathless. Wait, did vampires breathe? Shit. Focus up, Kravitz. He would have to ask about it later, though.
“Wednesday.” His voice was low and unsteady.
“Pick me up here at 7? You can take me dancing.”
Kravitz nodded, and a moment later he was back in the hallway. Still a little dazed, it took him longer than usual to unlock his door. One question kept circling back around in his mind, in the space between the drastic reshaping of his worldview and the agitated excitement for his upcoming date. What was he going to tell Angus?
It's day 28 of @taznovembercelebration - we're so close to the end! Today's prompt was "whisper" so enjoy! Read below or on Ao3. Missed yesterday? Here it is!
-
“You have a crush on Taako?” Yells Sloane at a higher volume than anyone has ever reached before and ever could again.
“Ssssh” Kravitz hisses. He jumps to his feet and wishes he could move this quickly when they were transitioning from floor to standing work in gym class. Klarg always looked slightly pitying as he wormed his way slowly to his feet.
Kravitz looks around desperately, maybe no one heard, maybe no one’s nearby? Fuck. There’s someone by the pond… wait, it’s not Taako, it’s Paloma, the tiny old lady who lives a few floors down. She probably couldn’t hear anything, no matter how loudly Sloane yelled, it was fine.
“What?” Sloane says, her voice magically lower again, massive grin fixed on her face.
“You can’t just go yelling secrets!” Kravitz tries to maintain a level of indignation despite his relief.
“Yeah. sure… secrets.” Sloane snorts out a little laugh.
“Why are you laughing?” Kravitz scans the courtyard again, okay, he’s probably fine, no one else is here.
“No reason.” She’s infuriating.
Kravitz sits back down on their picnic blanket. “Do you think it’s not a secret?” He asks quietly, because he, unlike some people, knows the proper volume at which to hold this conversation.
“It’s not not not a secret.” She runs her fingers through the grass and doesn’t look at Kravitz.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, it’s not not a secret because you, you know, haven’t told him.”
Kravitz nods happily.
“But it’s also not-not not a secret, because you’re always goopy when he’s around. You got him those flowers!”
“I get you flowers!”
“Yeah, and you’re not trying to bone down with me.”
“I don’t just want to bone down with Taako!”
“Awwwww.” Sloane kicks her feet up into the air. “Taako and Kravitz kissing in a tree, K I S S I N G!
“Sloane, you have to stop”
She just grins happily.
“Hey!” A familiar voice yells from up above. “Hey, handsome!”
Kravitz looks straight up at Taako’s balcony. He’s treated to the sight of Taako wearing the tiniest black pyjama shorts, a massive frou frou pink robe, and nothing else. Nothing else, he’s perfect.
“Are you okay?” Kravitz shouts up. Hopefully Taako’s not having some kind of emergency, Kravitz could start trying to climb the balconies now, that single session of bouldering before his arms hurt too much would probably stand him in good stead.
“Taako’s fine, my guy.” Taako waves and gives a thumbs up to illuminate this point.
“Then why did you shout?”
“Oh, I have a crush on you too.” Taako says, or rather yells, like it’s no big deal, like people just say these things.
“How did you…?”
“Paloma texted me.”
Kravitz turns to glare and she waves happily from the bench by the pond.
“You’re welcome!” She shouts.
He’d love to not be having this conversation at this volume. Now the only thing that could make this worse was…
“…Magnus!” Yells Magnus, winded, but still as peppy as usual. “I saw some messages in the group chat that said I had to get down here.”
Kravitz sighs, deeply, right down to his boots.
“Are you serious, Taako? You have to tell me if this is a joke.” Kravitz tries his best to ignore the fact that Lup and Barry have definitely just sidled out of the door, pretending to be transfixed by one of the trees.
“No joke my guy, Taako would ride you right into the sunset.” There’s a loud whoop from somewhere suspiciously near Paloma.
“Shall we have this conversation in private?” Kravitz shouts back. You know, maybe so his insides stopped liquifying with the embarrassment.
“I thought you were into shakespeare? This is basically Romeo and Juliet, Taako should know, he read the spark notes.”
“Did you plan this?”
“Do you like it?”
“I like bits of it.”
“I like your bits.” Taako hollers.
“Can I come up?” Kravitz asks, hopeful that direct action might save him having to have this conversation in public.
“Ooooh, you move fast. I like it. See you in 5.”
Kravitz runs all the way to the lift.
--
Enjoyed this and want some more? Find tomorrow's here.
Sometimes you kind of accidentally write 5k and post day 27 of @taznovembercelebration at 1am on day 28...
Anyway, today's is a 5k monster so it's going to live on ao3, but it's based off this au I outlined back in 2020, so i hope you like it!
Day 27: destroy
Angus, despite being part of it, doesn't trust the Bureau of Balance. There's something strange going on here, and he's going to get to the bottom of it.
aka: Angus figures everything out and fucks up Lucretia's whole Thing
The card I drew for this @taznovembercelebration entry was "sick," so you know what that means! It's time for more soft taakitz! Another incredibly self-indulgent one that was loosely inspired by me starting off this month horrifically sick and now being very grateful I can breathe again. Discussion of sickness in this one, naturally, but just inconvenient cold/upper respiratory infection stuff, nothing too serious.
“This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to anyone,” Taako declared, flopping back against his pillows. Lup crossed her arms and looked down at him with limited sympathy, which was extremely cruel of her if you asked him.
“You have a cold, Taako,” she said.
Taako sniffled, desperately trying and failing to clear at least one nostril. “It’s not just a cold, Lulu. It’s the worst cold I’ve ever had in my life, and it just had to happen when I have a first date planned.”
She rolled her eyes. “Kravitz isn’t going to evaporate just because you have to reschedule. Just text him and tell him you’re sick.”
She threw her hands up. “Then I don’t know what to tell you, bud. Maybe just be patient a little.”
Taako moaned. “You have no idea how hard it was to find a night that worked for both of us. And the maintenance meter is running, Lulu!”
“The… what?”
He rolled his eyes. “Oh, that's right. I forgot you've been dating the most devoted guy in the universe for three years. Let me remind you what it's like for us singletons.” He pushed himself back up to a sitting position to better make his point. “Whenever you're trying to set up a first date, or fuck, a second or third, there's a limit to how inconvenient you can be, or how weird, or how… much… before the guy decides to fuck off and ghost you. That's the maintenance meter, and by my count I'm already at a disadvantage because he caught me eating gogurt in the stacks that one time.”
Lup was looking at him like he had three heads. “I think maybe you just have shitty taste in men.”
“Well, when life gives you lemons,” he sighed, then fell into another coughing fit.
Lup sat down on the edge of his bed and rested her chin in her hand. “What about Kravitz? Do you think he’s another lemon?”
“No,” he said miserably. “I think he’s perfect. But that doesn't matter if he thinks I'm too much work to bother with."
She patted his leg sympathetically. “If he's as perfect as you think he'll know you're worth the work.”
Taako’s throat felt too tight all of a sudden, and not just from coughing all morning. “Thanks.”
“Any time, bud.” She pushed herself up off the bed. “I'm gonna go check on the soup. Yell if you need me.”
She headed to the kitchen, leaving Taako to burrow deeper into his blanket nest. He was half-dozing when their doorbell rang, startling him back to consciousness. He heard Lup answer the door, then a brief conversation he couldn't make out. A moment later she appeared in his doorway.
“Taako? You awake?”
He groaned in response, eager to get back to his nap.
“Kravitz is here.”
His eyes flew open. He struggled his way out of his tangle of blankets and into an upright position.
“What?” he exclaimed.
“Kravitz is here. Should I show him in?”
Taako recoiled at the thought. “Absolutely not! Look at me, Lulu! I'm at maintenance meter defcon one right now!”
Lup just rolled her eyes. “I'll show him in.”
Taako frantically tried to smooth down the worst of his bed head and straighten out his pajamas. There was a quiet knock on his door frame, and he looked up to see Kravitz standing there, a sympathetic smile on his face. He looked incredible, of course. Even on his day off he was wearing a three-piece suit, plus a tie with a subtle raven motif.
“Hi,” he said, taking a few steps into the room. “Sorry to barge in on your sick day.”
Taako laughed. “Sorry I look like such a fucking mess.”
“No!” He denied, gallantly. “You look fine! A little stuffed up, maybe-”
“I can think of something else I'd like stu-” Another fit of wet coughing overtook him, and he collapsed back onto the bed. “Fuck, forget it. I'm too sick to flirt right now.”
Kravitz's eyes were soft and kind as he looked at him. “Well, I was hoping I could help with that.” He held up a large canvas bag before depositing it on Taako’s bed.
“Let’s see….” He began rummaging through it, pausing occasionally to hold something up. “We've got DayQuil and NyQuil, depending on whether or not you want to be conscious for the next twelve hours. Some peppermint tea, to clear your nose and settle your stomach, if you need it, and some cough drops. I didn't know what kind of Gatorade you liked, so I got you orange, red, and blue, and hopefully one of those is good. And I knew Lup was probably taking care of food better than I possibly could, but I did bring you some saltines just in case. And….” He reached into the bag and pulled something out with a final flourish. “A friend to keep you company.”
It was a tiny stuffed plague doctor, which Kravitz set down gently on Taako’s bedside table. Taako stared at him, half-convinced he was looking at some sort of Kravitz-shaped fever dream.
“Krav, you didn't-” he croaked. “You didn't have to do all this.”
Kravitz shrugged. “It was just a quick trip to the store. Besides, I wanted to.” He tucked a stray lock of hair behind Taako’s ear and Taako was seized by a sudden desire to pounce on him, upper respiratory infection be damned. “You've got to get better soon so we can reschedule that date.” A slight shade of doubt passed over Kravitz’s face. “If you still want to, of course.”
Taako feigned a grimace. “Ooh, well, this is awkward, but I actually met an even hotter goth librarian while I was lying here hacking up a lung, so….”
Kravitz laughed, rich and genuine. Taako grinned up at him. As his laughter subsided, Kravitz gently took hold of Taako’s chin with a thumb and forefinger. He stooped slightly and Taako closed his eyes, turning his face up towards him, trying not to give away just how much it made his chest ache to have Kravitz here, all lovely and warm and seemingly unphased by his transformation into some sort of snot monster. Kravitz pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, then stepped back towards the door.
“Get some rest, Taako. I'll see you soon.”
Taako heard him say a quiet goodbye to Lup before he left the apartment. A moment later Lup was leaning against the doorframe with a smug grin on her face.
“So, did he just completely disprove your whole depressing ‘maintenance meter’ theory?”
Taako picked up the tiny plague doctor, still in a bit of a daze. “He could be the exception that proves the rule,” he replied absently.
“Well, for what it’s worth, I like him.”
“Yeah. Me too.” He snuggled back down into the blankets, his new plague-friend clutched close to his chest.
