hi

[teenjournalist]

The highest honor for any teen journalist is to be assassinated

[poopjournalist]

35 year old cold case titled "The poop Incident" has been solved by Fatty

[realmsofgames]

A flying creature has been detected in the mountainous area. Please go there to investigate.

[eblu3]

due to climate change the mario 64 iceberg has melted

[majorleagueupdates]

BREAKING: a bi-curious hot dog vendor at Yankee Stadium has posted a Spotify link.

[teenjournalist]

A fruitfly has drowned in the gorgeous, gorgeous depths of your eyes

[grox]

Scientists have discovered a strange middle ground between Elvis and Fat Elvis

[teenjournalist]

Aunts and Uncles are teaming up across the nation this thanksgiving to ask you why you're always on your phone but never have time to answer their calls

[femmenietzsche]

Park rangers told reporters that by licking moisture and grubs off the cliff wall the doomed man was able to pointlessly extend his unimaginable suffering for a further 6 to 7 days.

[datadegroove-deactivated2026042]

dumbest polar scientist gets killed by penguin

[tatzelwurming]

for one very special night during october, all candy becomes legal

[teenjournalist]

The most beautiful flower in the world has just wilted away for good

[coughloop]

In more bad news for kids: all playgrounds suck now

[evilvillain123456789]

A critical error in calculations regarding a spacecrafts reentry has unfortunately created the worlds first openly pansexual streak of ash in the atmosphere

[teenjournalist]

Several animals on the endangered species list passed away last night, like most nights

[teenjournalist]

The "Type 5318008 and turn it upside down" exploit found on all calculators has been patched, no longer works

[intactics-deactivated20250505]

blogger obtains long-coveted zero note post: "I just kept talking until I hit upon the shit no one cares about"