Circumcision - His body, his choice!
Personally, Iâve got a slight preference for the aesthetics of a cut cock. Maybe its because, as an American, Iâve only seen (in person) and been intimate with cut guys. And part of me feels guilty about that, because I am totally, 100% against the barbaric, unnecessary, and often dangerous practice of routine infant male circumcision, whether its done for religious or âmedicalâ/aka/cosmetic reasons.
I was circumcised 5 days after I was born, and it would be an understatement to say that it didnât go well for me. For starters, it was done without parental consent. My mother and I still havenât been able to determine if it happened due to oversight or a paperwork issue, or if the doctor decided to ignore the decision of a parent who was âjust being a wussâ about the whole thing. The pediatrician, who was supposed to be the best in the area, ended up removing too much skin from the shaft of my penis (although removing ANY skin from an infantâs genitals is âtoo muchâ in my opinion), which resulted in my scrotum being pulled up onto the shaft of my penis to âfill in the gapâ. The circumcision scar didnât heal properly, leaving a prominent âbridgeâ on the top of the shaft, which has been torn during sex and masturbation. The pediatrician also removed and then cauterized (burned) almost all of my frenulum, which is typically regarded (by non-American urologists and uncut men around the world) as the most sensitive part of the penis. During my circumcision, I went into shock due to the extreme pain and blood loss associated with my mildly-botched circumcision. And when my mother saw what had been done to me, her tears of grief and anger were ignored. There were no apologies, no attempts at any kind of reconstruction. All she got from the pediatrican was a slightly condescending reassurance that âit was really all for the bestâ. Such a painful, shocking, and traumatic experience should never be forced on anyone, especially a newborn baby.
Having only recently learned that my penis wasnât normal, that my circumcision was botched, and that it happened against the wishes of my parents, I attempted to bring a malpractice suit against the pediatrician at fault, but due to statutes of limitations in Colorado, the difficulty of obtaining old medical records, and the prohibitive upfront costs of malpractice suits, no malpractice lawyer would accept the case, not even David Llewellyn, who is the foremost authority on circumcision lawsuits and an ardent and well-connected âintactivistâ, although getting to know him and share my story and photographs of the damage for him to use in educational presentations was a great experience. Many of the lawyers said the case was legitimate, probably even winnable if a judge decided to hear it, but that it wasnât enough of a âslam dunkâ to make them confident enough to actually pay the upfront costs and represent me.
Due to the loss of the protective outer foreskin, the nerves that run along the underside of my penis are always exposed to irritation, and those nerves are directly connected to both the tip of the penis and the prostate. I have been diagnosed by multiple urologists with Chronic Prostatitis/ Chronic Pelvic Pain Disorder, and I suffer from frequent urinary discomfort and urgency as a result of that over-stimulation, as well as the damage that such a radically-tight circumcision causes to the lymphatic system in the groin area. Because my scrotum is now doing double duty as âball-sacâ and penile shaft, there is a considerable amount of bunched-up scrotal skin and pubic hair on the shaft of my penis, which makes condom use so painful that I canât keep an erection while wearing one. I often have trouble achieving orgasm while having sex. It takes me a very long time to orgasm. Granted, my girlfriend doesnât mind my stamina one bit, which I guess is a nice little silver lining in an otherwise shitty situation.
These statements arenât just my opinions or guesses, these are things my urologist taught me. He also clarified that circumcision has very little medical benefit. He echoed large scale studies showing that the biggest reason that parents chose to put their sons through such an ordeal is because the father is circumcised. Some American physicians also continue to subscribe to the outdated and disproved idea that circumcised penises are more hygenic than intact ones, although the vast majority of medical scholars and medical associations in First World countries have published countless studies and opinion papers debunking this harmful myth. The only medical problem that circumcision is meaningfully effective against is penile cancer, which is one of the rarest cancers in all of human medicine, and really only occurs in men with phimosis (a condition where the opening of the foreskin is too tight and cannot be retracted) and who are also tobacco smokers. The strangest part is that my urologist knows all of these are consequences of circumcision, and still has a rather neutral stance on the major ethical violation that it is. He even went to Africa with the World Health Organization to circumcise African men as a response to the HIV/AIDS epidemic there. Whether I agree with that or not is something I havenât decided.
If youâre cut, and you like it, thatâs awesome! Iâm glad for you! Iâm sure your sons, nephews, and grandsons will appreciate it if you help make sure that they get to decide for themselves whether they want to be like you.
If youâre cut and youâre unhappy with it, then consider non-surgical foreskin restoration. There are plenty of resources for you. Just google âforeskin restorationâ and go from there, although once you start learning about the negative effects of your circumcision, you may deal with some pretty strong emotions, and you may need to prepare yourself for what you find out. Now, I have just started my journey towards regaining my natural body and feeling whole again, but in the past few months, Iâve noticed that sex feels better and I feel like I am regaining control and autonomy over my body after being mutilated as a baby. But I still struggle with lots of feelings of anger and loss on a daily basis, on top of the physical pain and damage that the circumcision caused.
If youâre uncut and considering circumcision, take the time to really do your research about what it will be like afterwards, and donât ever feel like you have to have a part of your body amputated so that youâll look ânormalâ. Remember, 80% of the men in the world have foreskins. Educate yourself and your sexual partner(s) about your foreskin, about the benefits they provide, and debunk the myth that your natural, intact penis is somehow âdirtyâ or âgrossâ. Point out that women who have had intercourse with both intact and circumcised men generally prefer the sensations caused by the âgliding motionâ of the foreskin. Adult circumcision may take a little longer to heal, but is typically much safer and is always carried out under local anesthetic, unlike many infant circumcisions. Lots of guys who get cut for cosmetic reasons (rather than medical necessity) end up regretting it. That said, a minority of men who get circumcised as adults are very happy with the results, and if you are ready to make that decision, nobody has the right or prerogative to stop you, because itâs YOUR body, YOUR choice, and whatever you decision you make should be supported and celebrated.
If youâre going to have a baby boy, please opt out of having him circumcised and make it very clear to everyone involved - from your ObGyn to the Pediatrician and to the nursing staff - that you do not want your son to be circumcised. You can get FREE âDO NOT CIRCUMCISEâ ankle bands for your baby boy to wear in the hospital to avoid mistakes like the one that happened to me and countless other infant males born in the USA. Order them for yourself at http://tlctugger.com/product/infant-ankle-bands-2-do-not-circumcise-or-retract/ . Your son will grow up with the ability to make that decision about his body, and that is a great gift. If you are a Christian, please understand that circumcision is not required by doctrine, scripture, or common practice. The vast majority of non-American and non-Arab Christians are uncircumcised. If you are Jewish or Muslim or belong to any other culture or religion that promotes or ârequiresâ ritual circumcision of male children, take time to research alternative rituals that will allow you to participate fully in your faith and cultural community, while allowing your son to exercise his religious freedom when he is old enough to make that decision for himself. There are many Jews and Muslims who feel uncomfortable with circumcising their young sons and privately or publicly decide to break with tradition and leave the choice up to the boy, and they should be applauded and supported for the love and care they show their sons.
If youâve made it this far, thank you for taking the time to read and consider what I have to say. If you agree with what Iâve put forward here, please reblog and share via social media. The horror and tragedy of female genital mutilation has become well known in recent years due to education campaigns. That is so encouraging. Now, we can all work together to get rid of circumcision of male children, too, and give the choice and voice back to the people to which they belong. Remember, itâs HIS body, HIS decision.
Thank you!
