Random Thoughts

A space for my thoughts that flows whenever my mind is inspired, my heart is broken or when my soul is weary.

[thatgirlzel]

...then I saw you, again. For the past years I have not thought of seeing you again. You look great. You look happy.

Then my memory of the past came.

I felt something for you and I know you had too, well I'd like to think that you had. We've known each other since we we're kids. And during that younger years, other kids would notice there's something between us. But then we were just kids.

And then we grow apart. Really far apart.

Then we had our paths cross, again. We were just like before. Oh! No. We were much closer than before.

Then people notice this kind of chemistry between us. I just don't say anything about it. I don't know if they asked you.

Then, there was a time that I know you were ready to talk about this thing to me, but I had to block that. I told you that I forgot what we were when we are younger. Yes I lied. The truth is, I never forgot what you were to me back on our younger years. And you had been that until that day. I wanted to give you that answer but I didn't.

I knew you were willing to give it a try, but my insecurities were stronger than what I felt for you. I wasn't in the better version of myself. And I know that you deserve someone better. I know it's not me.

And so we're going on each other's opposite directions. But I still look back on you. I am genuinely happy for what life has turned out to be on you.

As for me...

You will be that question without answer. That something I can't name of. A reminder of my cowardness to try and my strength that I can let go if it's not for me.

My life still goes on. I am better and i am aiming to be best.I am rolli'n like what I should. I am looking forward to what life has for me.

And amidst all that, you are a reminder of my life's what if.

[thoughtkick]

“Change your conception of yourself and you will automatically change the world in which you live. Do not try to change people; they are only messengers telling you who you are. Revalue yourself and they will confirm the change.”

— Neville Goddard

[thoughtkick]

“I realize now that dying is easy. Living is hard.”

— Gayle Forman, If I Stay

[quotespile]

“There are people who trick you and deliver emptiness with a smile, while others rob you of your self-respect. You need to remember who you are.”

— Colson Whitehead, The Nickel Boys

[thatgirlzel]

Kaya ba ng waste management na magkaroon din ng tapunan para sa sobrang emosyon, problema, hinanakit at sama ng loob?

Paano kung mag isa ka lang sa buhay tapos wala naman din makikinig sa rants mo

... oo nga pala may prayer pa

[stay-close]

“I’m independent and strong, but sometimes…just sometimes, it’s nice to be taken care of.”

— Samantha Towle

[thoughtkick]

“I loved you long before I had the guts to let you know.”

— William Chapman

[litsnaps]

[thatgirlzel]

[thatgirlzel]

My sister's fur baby : Yuji

🧡

[quotespile]

“Maybe you feel pressure to be positive because so many people rely on your good, fake-positive energy? If that’s the case, screw everybody else. You’re not a bottle of Valium.”

— Augusten Burroughs, This Is How

[quotespile]

“When I lost my sight… people said I was brave. When my father left, people said I was brave. But it is not bravery; I have no choice. I wake up and live my life. Don’t you do the same?”

— Anthony Doerr, All the Light We Cannot See

[thoughtkick]

“Staying quiet doesn’t mean I have nothing to say, it means I don’t think you’re ready to hear my thoughts.”

— Unknown

[iglovequotes]

[thoughtkick]

“A mistake is an accident. Cheating and lying are not mistakes, they are intentional choices.”

— Unknown

[thoughtkick]

“I’m not sure which is worse: intense feeling, or the absence of it.”

— Margaret Atwood, The Blind Assassin

[thatgirlzel]

To our dearest dog Manse,

This is day 1 of us not having you around. I know that it is better for you to leave this soon because i know it is painful for you and we cannot bear to see you suffer.

You are something we look forward to that excited look we see in your eyes and that wagging tail when we go home from work. We love hugging your fluffy body and you hug back and kiss us too.

I love buying toys for you coz it's so funny watching you play. Your toys are still in good condition until your dog buddy SamSam gave it a good chew! That's why I understand why you dont want sharing your toys with her.

Its funny when you are having your bath and you always know when to offer your paws to be scrubbed. You hate it when we spray your cologne but you love the soap with that same baby powder scent.

I thing that's kinda odd is that you also like to sleep with pillow. Tsk. It's also funny when you have to lightly stomp your hind leg when your poop is about to come out.

We'll miss your held tilt like you are wondering or when you call your dog crush name-winter. You always stuck your tongue out when you are happy,and that's very often.

I love it when you know its picture taking time when I say,"Manse,picture!"

Or when you always look out at the window just because,like you are evesdropping or something. Only to bark at those big dogs passing by as if you are bigger than them.

I know you are annoyed by medicine you need to take coz I had stuck them on your favorite papa's recipe cooked liver. You had to inspect it throughly before eating it. But yu need to take those.

You are not the whinny kind of dog. When you were sick I did not even heard you cry. I understand that you have to go, you're pallor gets worse everyday. Though i thought you'll start to recover because you were sitting facing our window. It kinda gave me hope. My sister said you muster your strength left to greet her when she called you that morning and then you took your last breath. You probably wanted to see us all at least before you go

I just regret that I did not get to see you before I go to work that day. But I guess this is better coz I'll probably cry even more if I saw you trying to stand, weak and wobbly just see us. I hope it was not to painfull for you when you go.

I'll always remember that happy dog look you have everyday.

I hope that you were happy when you were with us because you gave us so much joy. And it's hard to fill that space we have when you left.

You are a family to us

You'll always be our number 1 dog

Manse Hug! 🤗🤗🤗🤗

Love you ❤