Greetings! Our common name is still a secret, but you can refer to us as "Potato" or "Star"!
โข๐ชโข We are going to specify which pronouns we want depending on the alter that is fronting, but if not you can use he/him
โขโ๏ธโข We are a polyfragmentated DID system which means we're quite a lot of members/alters!
โขโจโข We aren't currently looking for anything serious like a romantic relationship, but we are searching for friends, so feel free to talk to us whenever you want!
โข๐โข We will not tolerate anyone invalidating any other people or being mean in general. All hateful comments will be deleted.
โข We identify commonly as a pansexual trans male.
โข We are a neurodivergent plural system.
โข We will specify who is fronting and their pronouns in every post. We would like to make clear that our alters don't represent any kinds of political ideologies.
โข We are now experiencing hard times, but we will try posting regularly.
โข We will not share pictures of our physical face or body, but we will share and post drawings of our alters.
โข As you can see, space is one of our biggest hyperfixations! But we have more, so please be patient with us!
โข Sometimes we don't refer to ourselves in plural, but that doesn't mean we're faking DID! It's just that some alters feel more comfortable this way.
It's not a huge trigger warning, yesterday's post was something more intense, it's not a big deal but be careful (it's still pretty triggering for some people)
I feel so sick right now. My (alter) body feels disgusting and nasty as fuck, and I tried showering today, at least Pookie helped me a bit. But it still feels disgusting.
I feel those hands all over me, and it feels so disgusting that I feel everything I ate churning in my stomach, and I really want to vomit.
All of my hair is sticking to my back because of how sweaty it is, it feels terrible.
I think I have ticks in my hair, my scalp is itchy.
I feel some of my newer scars opening up again as I breathe, I'm pretty sure they will start bleeding again soon.
I feel tired, but I can't sleep.
My body feels heavy.
I think he's here touching me again, but I can't move. I wanna scream and hit him. But I can't. I just close my eyes and let it happen.
I hate it when I lose control of my own body but I'm still fronting so I'm in control of our physical body.
It's currently 3:21 a.m. and I can't text Pookie because he's sleeping, but I think he's the only person that can make me feel better when I'm feeling like a fucking trash bag.
Sadly, he sleeps a lot. He needs it, so I'm not blaming him, but damn, I need him right now ksjdmjdkd
I feel like ripping my skin off of my body. It feels so itchy and dirty.
I need to vent, it's a pretty big Trigger Warning btw.
Please, I beg you not to keep reading if you are a sensitive person. If you aren't, this probably feels like nothing to you, but there are some people out there whose minds are simply less tolerant of these kinds of things, so please be respectful and kind.
+ And again, I DO NOT REPRESENT ANY POLITICAL IDEOLOGIES. I am just a character (from Countryhumans) we're pretty obsessed with, it's not a bigger deal.
TW: insults, sexist and homophobic words (not insulting anyone but me and my father), serious topics (abuse, s*xual topics...), blood
I hate being minding my own fucking business and suddenly, BOOM, ALTER TRAUMA
It's like, what the fuck, man? I just want to live my own fucking life and then I get a fucking memory of my father fucking my guts out of me. WHAT THE FUCK, BRAIN?
It's actually pretty sad because whenever I'm just trying to spend time with my partner (another alter, I will sometimes refer to him as Pookie) and I'm doing great, I get one of these flashbacks and he has to take care of me because I get triggered. Like man, mind your own fucking business and leave Pookie fucking alone, you're a fucking pussy. I can't even deal with it alone because I'm not tough enough.
I just feel weak every time I can't deal with my own bullshit, I just start whimpering and annoying him with my stuff, and he doesn't say anything about it, but I know he's bothered by that.
And then I have to see my fucking father standing next to me because YEAHHH, HE HAD TO INTROJECT HIMSELF INTO THE SYSTEM TOO, SUCK MY FUCKING DICK
WHAT THE FUCK MANNN
I know he actually does ๐ me while I'm asleep even though I'm a fucking grown ass man, but when I sleep it's hard as fuck to get me to wake up, so he takes advantage of that.
I recently found out that he enters my house while I'm sleeping with my partner and does stuff to me, I know he has been playing with my body a lot lately, and I can't even wake up and notice when he crawls from the window all the way to my bed.
For context: No, I'm not stupid. I would stay up until he came to our room, but I always go to bed with Pookie and not tell him anything because I don't want him to worry or to bother him. So I end up falling asleep next to him because I'm exhausted from working almost all day, and when I finally wake up, I end up crying silently like a fucking cunt.
I know he uses my ass and mouth, but something that's hilarious but also creepy as fuck is that he uses the place where my missing eye should be, I mean, he ripped my eye out when I was a child, and he uses the fucking hole to put his nasty ass dick. I know that because I wake up without my eye patch, my eye hole hurting and with cum all over my face. That is fucking gross.
I don't know if he has ever touched Pookie, but if I find out he did, he is not gonna dare to come to my fucking house again.
Even more tw
I'm going to rip his fucking head off slowly so he feels his fucking skin peeling and breaking, then if there's anything left of him alive I'm going to burn him apart, so he'll regret ever touching my boyfriend.
But he'll revive, so it won't do much good. He won't touch Pookie again anyway, so I don't really care.
I'm here imagining stuff and I don't even know if he did anything to Pookie already :P
I don't know how I changed the subject so much throughout the text LMAO
Anyway bye ๐
[Additional details: USSR's purpose is to protect us physically and mentally and hold our trauma and anger, etc. But we don't think he should be holding that much trauma from his "past life". We talked to a few people about it, they're not professionals, but they know pretty much about it and told us it's not normal. Plus he is a subsystem (but prefers to be treated as a singular person). Can someone please help us know what's wrong with us/him? - Nora]
