That One Shady Shop @thatoneshadyshop - Tumblr Blog

Why did the Bosmer lumberjack cut into his own leg?

He got confused when somebody called him a Wood Elf.

An Imperial, a Nord, and a chicken walk into a bar. The Nord turns to the chicken and asks “who’s the other guy?”

And the chicken replies, “No idea, it’s not like I know all the poultry in Tamriel.”

Sticks and stones may break one’s bones, but words can never hurt one.

Unless one is speaking to the Dragonborn.

The healers of Solstheim have been known to perform real Mirrakles.

If one Spriggan kills another, it is treeson.

An Argonian priest is a Velocipastor.

What kind of pants do Storm Atronachs wear?

Thunderwear.

Never trust a High Elf. They usually have Alterior motives.

Why doesn’t the Mages Guild teach mathematics?

They are too focussed on spelling.

Necromancers are all excellent athletes.

They are bodybuilders.

After fighting in the rain, the Stormcloak was Stormsoaked.

I hope this isn't weird but I've been enjoying reading about your oc so I drew him

This is amazing, thank you so much! You’ve really made my week!

The preferred method of contraception for Khajiit is their personalities.

Some people fear success.

Redguards have nothing to fear.

The Dunmer gene pool could really use some lifeguards.

Ignorance is truly bliss. Just ask an Argonian.

If you can smell smoke, look for the Nord thinking too hard.

That One Shady Shop