Oi gente. Resolvi criar um diário pra falar um pouco mais de mim. Lá eu escrevo sobre minha relação com a comida, meu corpo, borderline, faço desenhos e escrevo bastante. Sei que o Tumblr tem dessas coisas de suspender contas de vez em quando... Não sei se a minha vai ser suspendida futuramente, atingi um número bastante alto de seguidores. Mas quem quiser ainda me conhecer ou ter contato comigo, eu vou deixar esse link :)
Faça um perfil privado no Instagram e grave stories fingindo ser blogueira (Bom dms,slc
converse com seus amigos
Jogue jogo de cartas
jogue jogos de tabuleiro
jogue rpg, é legalzinho dms
Baixe IMVU só pra fazer bonequinhas
Aprenda uma nova coreografia, bem agitada pra gastar kcal
tenta tirar fotos
chama uma amiga e dança Just dance, ou sozinha msm
tire fotos do seu corpo pra monitorar a sua evolução
pesquise "jogos para meninas" e se divirta
escute música
karaoke
organize suas playlist
tire todas as músicas que você não aguenta mais ouvir
assista um podcast
assista desfiles de moda
Veja a tradução de todas as músicas da sua playlist
🖼️ Faça arte
desenhe alguma coisa
Se desenhe
desenhe alguém
Tente reproduzir desenhos do Pinterest
aprenda a fazer desenhos digitais
faça croquis de moda
faça cartinhas
faça um presente a mão pra alguém
Crie um poema
aprenda a tocar algum estrumento
Faça algum estrumental pelo celular
componha uma música
aprenda a cantar uma música de um idioma diferente
Aprenda a fazer Grafite
Tire fotos (Suas, de algum lugar, de algum objeto, de alguém...)
📚 Estude para trabalhar, magreza não é uma qualidade pra por no currículo.
Estude marketing
Estude História
Tente aprende matemática básica
Vai decorar a tabuada
Vai aprender a fazer uma divisão com vírgula
Vai aprender a fazer contas com fração
Já sabe o que vai fazer da vida? faz uma listinha de trabalhos que você tem interesse e pesquise sobre cada um deles.
Estude pra algum vestibular
Quer ter o seu próprio negócio? então estude empreendedorismo
estude tráfego
estude dropshipping
vai aprender a vende algum produto
monte a estética da sua lógica
Aprenda português (isso vale pra mim, pq o tanto de erro que eu cometi nesse post, só a misericórdia)
aprenda a usar pontuação
aprenda a fazer redação
decore um modelo de redação
Estude inglês, espanhol, francês ou qualquer outra língua que você tem interesse.
estude inteligência emocional
Estude FILOSOFIA
Estude filosofia política
Estude estoicismo
estude sobre moda
Faça uma lista de coisas que vai cair no vestibular que você quer fazer e ESTUDE
Aprenda sobre política
Quer ser uma boa puta? Pesquise sobre Cátia damasceno. Até a prostituição exige um bom estudo
🏋🏻♀️ Mexa o seu corpo
Procure fazer academia
Faça exercícios em casa
monte sua rotina de exercícios físicos
Aprenda a dançar alguma coreografia (nem que seja do tiktokkkkk)
Aprenda a dançar Stiletto, é ótimo para autoestima
Aula de pole dance, também é ótimo pra autoestima. Pesquise se tem alguma perto da sua casa (nem precisa ter vergonha mô, as mulheres não julgam o corpo das outras na aula.. só se elas forem tão inseguras quanto você)
Corra!! Faz uma corrida aí, nem que seja parada (começa com 10 minutos)
Pule corda
Faça caminhadas, dê voltas
Ande de bicicleta.
chama as best pra correr por aí, sla
Faça Pilates!!! Emagrece muito, é ótimo pra coluna, e ainda dá flexibilidade
Você se lembra de quando foi a ultima vez que você olhou no espelho e gostou do que viu? Pois bem, se sua resposta foi "não", eu irei te ajudar, querida(o)..
se lembre de quantas vezes você foi humilhada(o), esquecida(o), trocada(o) e usada (o) por ser gorda.
se lembre da quele(a) garoto(a) que te deu um fora simplesmente porque você é gorda(o), se lembre dos seus amigos falsos que dizem que você esta "linda(o)", "perfeita(o)" mas você sabe que esta gorda(o), você não vai mais precisar deles.. se lembre de quando você saia com amigas(os) ou com sua família e não podia experimentar roupas por ser gorda(o), de quando ninguém te olhava a não ser pra te zuar, se lembre de quando todos te deram "apelidos" e você fingia que não se importava ou que achou engraçado, mesmo eu e você sabendo do quando aquilo doeu..
Eu serei sua amiga, eu te darei o controle do seu corpo, te deixarei magra(o), eu vou fazer você sentir dor, desconforto e resultados rápidos, mas eu nunca vou te abandonar, se você também não me abandonar.. ninguém pode saber que nós somos como um, ninguém pode saber da gente, ok?
Eu irei fazer você sentir seus ossos, irei fazer toda a gordura nojenta e podre sair do seu corpo, irei fazer você ter o controle do seu corpo. Você não poderá comer muito, ou apenas não vai comer.. mas sinceramente, você merece isso, não é? O tempo de comer tudo o que quiser e engordar acabou agora que eu entrei na sua vida, siga o que eu te digo e você sera livre tão rápido que nem vai perceber..
Seja fiel as regras e terá resultados, eu garanto isso ♥
Warnings: smut 18+ only (minors DNI), Daddy kink (kinda expected), established relationship, age gap (reader is between 24-25, Joel is in his 50s), oral (male receiving), fem!reader
A/N: I've always thought Joel was hot but Pedro Pascal playing him really did it for me, trying to improve my smut so I hope this is better than my last one. <3!!
You were going through an old building as a short cut you didn't realize it at first from the decay and rubble, but the more you looked around, you could see that it used to be a mall. You looked inside a store seeing if you could find anything useful when you spot it. It was a sign from fate; you go and grab the shirt and hold it up to look at. Considering what it's been through, it was in pretty good condition, like it was saved for you. You quickly take off your backpack and put it on. It was a little small; you assume it was a baby tee from the fit of it, but you had a long sleeve under, so you were still covered. You hear Ellie call your name and grab your stuff and run over to them.
Joel starts walking, leading you out once he sees you, “Took you long enough come on lets get out of here” You see Ellie looking at the shirt, trying to read it.
“I heart-i heart, whats a DILF?” Ellie asks more so to anyone than directly to her you could see the gears turning in her head trying to figure out what each letter means.
You wish you could take a picture of Joel's face when he heard that, he turned around so fast, “Where the hell did you find that at” “C’mon Joel you know this is my brand, my whole motto, this is me, it was fate that brought me and this shirt together and Im never taking it off.”
“Dead I Like, Deadly I-ok I give up what is it” you both ignored Ellie trying to figure out what DILFS are.
“I can't take you anywhere, how do you always manage to find the most ridiculous shit during an apocalypse.”
“Hey! what is it, I don't get it.” You hear Ellie shouting at you clearly annoyed, but youre more focused on Joel at the moment.
“Aw Joel don't be jealous you know you're the only DILF for me”
“Can you shut the hell up.” You giggled slightly at the clear annoyance in his voice. You loved messing with him when you can, and when it wouldn't put you in danger of course, you added some much-needed fun to his life.
You finally leave the mall and walk out onto the road; you were so excited about your DILF shirt, you had an eye for things like this. You knew you couldn't take back everything you find but if it was small or something you really liked you took with you like when you found an old hello kitty watch, it didn't work, but it was still cute. Another time you found a Britney Spears poster in decent condition that was currently hanging up in your room, but the DILFS shirt was definitely your favorite after the poster. You were happy to add it to your little collection.
“Can someone please explain what is a DILF I don't get it and why is Joel one?” Ellie asks for the billionth time, getting frustrated at you both for not listening to her.
“Its da-” You were interrupted by Joel his deep voice, a little upset at you for almost telling Ellie, you didnt think it was too inappropriate but he clearly disagreed.
“Absolutely not youre not telling her she doesn't need to know, way too young for that, Im surprised you even know what it means” he responded, looking back at you mortified at where you had learned it from.
“Hey! I was born before the pandemic you know” you tell him, reminding him that you’re not that young. Although compared to him, you were.
“You were what 4, 5 when it happened can’t have remembered much before.” you heard the sass in his voice but you continue trying to prove that it shouldn't be surprising that you know what a DILF is.
“Okay, Im not ancient like you but still I had older friends, and we would talk about-” He interrupts you again, staring at you with frowned eyebrows.
“Please stop there I really don’t want to know what you and your friends talk about, can we just change topics please.” If they told you about DILFs, he really didn't want to hear what else teens talked about in this world.
“Dude c’mon, why can't you tell me, Im not a little kid.” Ellie says again, trying to get both of your attention and get you to explain it to her. You know now she’s not gonna let it go since Joel told her no. But you decided you’ll explain it later, especially after the whole playboy magazine situation, and she was around the same age you first heard it from your friends so you didnt see the issue.
“Alright from here until we get to where we are headed we are quiet, no one says a word unless you're dying got it” you could tell Joel had heard enough, and considering that you were outside you told it was best to listen to him and not distract him or yourself.
“got it” “yes sir” you lean towards Ellie. “He’s in a mood today huh” deciding to bother him one last time before you would have be serious.
She was about to respond until you walked right into Joel, giving you a yet intimidating glare frowning his eyebrows at you. “alright alright, i’ll shut up.”
After a couple hours of walking, Joel found a small safe building to sleep for the night, and you had been talking to Ellie until she fell asleep; you walk over into the room Joel was in, deciding to tease him again.
“Hey daddy whatcha doing?” you call out in his direction, watching as he rolls his eyes at the name.
“Stop.” he responded flatly, clearly not amused by your jokes, but you decided to keep them going.
“What's wrong Daddy does it make you flustered?” You thought he was going to give you another flat response or tell you to shut up. But you were wrong, instead, he stands up and walks over to you, standing closer than you anticipated, you try to step back slightly, but his arm around your waist prevents you from going too far. You feel the blood rush to your cheek and ears, your mouth goes dry, not knowing what to say or how to respond.
“Oh look who’s flustered now, sweetheart.” His deep voice teases you back, having more of an effect on you than your teasing did on him. You feel yourself get hotter, your brain is unable to focus anything except on how close he was and his rough hand around your waist forcing you closer to him, though you didn't mind. You continue blinking up at him, speechless.
“Youre so quiet now what happened, thought you were teasing me baby?”
You continue to stare at his brown eyes, the only thing you brain was thinking way, wow hes so hot. You look up into his face, taking in his features. The wrinkles around his pretty brown eyes, the scars and cuts around his face. God you always thought he was attractive but it still amazes you how hot and pretty he was. You could look at him all day.
He wraps both his hand around your waist, pulling you to him,places his lips on yours. You loved kissing Joel. It was rare having him kiss you while you weren’t in the safety of the QZ. He usually couldn’t relax enough to kiss you, needing to be alert and focused just in case. So this took you by surprise but his kisses always made you feel warm and safe, and in that moment, you didn't have to worry about anything. All that mattered was him.
You wrap your hands around his neck as you deepen the kiss, pressing your lips against his rough lips, closing your eyes as you melt into his embrace; his hands lower down your waist and squeeze your ass, which surprises you so much that you let out a small gasp against his lips. Joel pulls away slightly, smiling at you “youre cute” His actions confused you; you rarely ever are intimate outside the walls, but you trusted him and if he felt comfortable you knew you were safe so you decided to mess with him “hmm I dont daddy youre pretty cute yourself.”
He guides you over to the makeshift bed, leading you by your waist, making you walk backward, as you continue kissing him, parting your lips slightly, allowing his tongue to slip inside yours.
“You ain’t gonna stop are you” he asks he sits down and pulls you down onto his lap; you couldn’t tell iif he seriously was tired of you calling him that or if he just teasing too.
“what you don't like it Daddy?” you ask, trying to gauge his reaction you didn’t want to push it too far or actually make him uncomfortable.
“I never say that now did I, sweetheart?” again, he confused you does that mean he liked it or that he didn’t mind you joking about it? you stare at his face trying to see.
Your thoughts are interrupted by him pulling your lips onto his again. But more aggressively than earlier, moaning into his mouth and rolling your hips against him as he gropes your ass through your jeans.
“Joel” You moan against his lips before you lean your head into his neck.
“Aw baby what happened to daddy huh” you pull away, looking up at him with wide eyes, surprised. Did he like it? You look at his face and see his eyes full of lust, and you realized he liked it. He liked it when you called him daddy. You look down, suddenly getting shy and embarrassed about saying it. It was one thing saying it as a joke and teasing him about it, but to moan, it was different; it was dirtier.
He saw you getting shy and flustered in his lap, avoiding eye contact with him. Unlike you, he could read you like the back of his hand; he could easily tell you were embarrassed.
“c’mon baby no need to be shy, I can tell you like too don’t you” he softly stroked your waist when one hand and squeezes your ass with the other. you take your gaze off the floor onto him. nodding in agreement with him.
“C’mon baby need you say it, you like calling me daddy don’t you” you could tell he wanted you to say it out loud, his hand rubbing small patterns on your waist encouraging you, reassuring you that you didn’t need to be embarrassed.
“Yea i like it daddy” you mutter quietly, still ashamed to say in a serious setting. Not quite ready to admit to yourself that calling Joel daddy turned you on as much as it did.
You didn't think you would like it or find it this attractive. Maybe it was your lack of a father growing up, and Joel being older than you. You didn't know why; all you knew is that once you said it, you felt yourself getting wetter.
“hmm good girl” he takes your face into his hands, kissing you again; you slip your tongue into his mouth, his deep voice letting out a moan against your mouth. You couldnt help but grind and roll your hips against him, searching for any type of release.
He goes to lift your shirt but stops slightly, rolling his eyes “Want me to fuck you in the I heart DILFS shirt dont you?” you look at him, nodding laughing a little “you know me so well.”
He sighs and shakes his head. Although there’s disappointment in his voice, you can tell there’s also amusement. “ I do, dont why I tolerate you”
“You love me, cant live without me, I bring adventure into your life you’d be so bored without me.” you remind him why he puts up with you.
“Shut up” he mutters, though you sensed the amusement in his voice because he knows you’re right. As much as you annoyed him, he couldn’t imagine living without your teasing and antics.
You unbutton his shirt and take it off, lightly grazing your fingers across his chest, admiring his chest and body, you see more scars and healed wounds but you also see his muscles. You’ve always loved his body. You remember the nights in your apartment placing, kissing along his waist, his chest, his stomach.
You thought about placing marks on his chest but were interrupted by him unzipping your jeans and lifts your hips up to slide your pants off, you get off his lap, taking off the rest of your pants. You unzip his pants, pulling them down, you stare at his bulge through his boxers and press kisses onto his dick, teasing him through his boxers.
“Wanna suck you off” you mumble quietly, focusing on how much you need him in your mouth. You weren’t even sure he heard or understood you until you hear his deep voice speak to you, breaking you away from your thoughts.
“What’d you say darling couldnt hear” You know he heard you he just wanted you to say it louder.
“Can I please suck your dick daddy” you look up at him batting your eyelashes while you rub your hand against his hard dick. You feel his dick twitch against your hand while he bites his lip, suppressing a moan.
“Goddamn darling you’re killing me” his texas accent getting stronger as he gets harder in his boxers, you loved hearing his deep texas accent come out as he gets more turned on by you.
He pulls down his boxers, and no matter how many times you’ve seen his dick, you’re still in shocked at how big he is. You can’t help but to stare for a couple of seconds taking it in, you smile up at him before teasing him licking the tip gently as you lightly stroke him, you continue placing kitty licks on his dick. He shivers against your tongue, and you love it, love watching him fall apart because of you and seeing how much your mouth affected him.
You gather some spit in your mouth before you drool some onto his dick. He rolls his eyes back as you slowly stroke his cock in your hand, using your spit as lube. You hear his deep voice moaning as you lean down and lick the tip while still stroking him. You start to slowly speed your hand when you feel his hand lightly tugging your hair making you stop and stare up at him.
“you’re gonna have to speed it up sweetheart.”
That was all he said before his hand grabbed the back of your head and forced your lips onto his cock. You hollow your cheeks and take him in further, feeling your nose brush against his hair at the base of his cock. He moves his hips gently fucking your throat
“Fuck you feel so good” he murmured under his breath, his voice deeper than his usual tone. You closed your eyes as you felt yourself starting to choke on him,he started to thrust his hips faster into your mouth.
“C’mon baby look at me, look at daddy.”
You couldn’t help but moan around him at his words, feeling yourself getting more turned on as he called himself daddy. You listen, looking up at him through your eyelashes as you continue taking him down your throat.
“Atta girl, so pretty looking up at me like that.” you feel yourself getting warmer from his praise, loving how vocal he was, you wish you were back at his apartment so he could be louder without the risk of drawing unwanted and dangerous attention.
He moves the hair that was falling in front of your face behind your ears “you look fucking gorgeous sucking my dick darling” feeling butterflies in your stomach as he compliments you.
You take him out of your swollen lips when you start feeling dizzy from the lack of air; you continue to stroke him in your hands as you catch your breath until he puts his hand on your head, guiding your mouth back onto his cock. His deep voice moans out your name under his breath as he gets closer to his release.
“fuck darling i’m close keep on-yes like that baby god you like this huh like having daddy’s dick in your mouth sweetheart?”
You nod as best you could, trying to agree, but all that comes out is your moans against his dick. You could tell he was close as his started to get slightly louder, but you could tell he was trying his best to be quiet. His deep voice teased you, making your head go fuzzy in arousal. You nod your head slightly as you stick your tongue, anxiously waiting for his release. Instead, you're met with his hand forcing him into your mouth. Making you gag as he starts thrusting into your mouth, sloppy fucking into your mouth. He moans your name as he cums into your mouth.
You held your head onto his cock until he finish before you slowly took him out your mouth. He holds your cheek in his hands, lightly caressing them.
“Open baby girl let me see.” you happily open your mouth, showing how you swallowed his cum. “Good girl baby c’mere” he pulls you onto his lap again before placing a kiss on your lips , softly biting your bottom lip before pulling away. He holds you in his lap for a couple of minutes. you lay your head on his shoulder as he softly rubs his hand up and down your back.
“if we were at home you know i’d take care of you that right baby” his deep voice makes you lift your head off of him, looking into his eyes. Before you met Joel, you thought older men didn’t have much of a sex drive, you didn’t know if it was just Joel or all men in their 50s but he proved you wrong. There have been many nights in his room where he would fuck more than one time; the first time caught you by surprise. Of course, you both paid the price in the morning; both sore, aching muscles had to spend the next day in bed, not being able to do much. So you know he would have fuck if you were back at home.
“Of course i do” you play with the hair at the back of his neck for a little while before getting off his lap so he could put his clothes back on, and you do the same. You didn't mind; you knew sucking him off was as much risk as he could take, and you didn't really feel comfortable enough to fuck out in the open like this. After you both have your clothes on, you lay down with Joel, wrapping your arms around his waist as he turned, pressing your back into your chest, falling asleep. Trying to rest before you’d have to walk back to the QZ in the morning.
quem diria que crescer iria deixar os meus transtornos psicológicos ainda mais intensos do que sempre foram, invés de amenizarem. eu cresci ouvindo que era uma fase e iria passar, fiz 11 anos e não passou, também não passou com 12 anos, 13 anos, 14 anos, 15 anos, 16 anos, 17 anos e 18 anos, a minha idade atual. “eles” continuam aqui, e parecem mais demoníacos do que nunca. estavam certos em falar que era uma fase e iria passar, eu que não entendia o significado - de fato era uma fase que passaria, e consequentemente, com o passar do tempo, as fases passaram mas para níveis ainda mais perturbadores
Juro que a parti de amanha serei uma mulher de verdade, vou perde peso sim e começar uma dieta restritiva, 20h NF todos os dias e claro ter uma refeição por dia também
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