BANLAND'S CALLIN'

Banhammer parody blog rah!!!!! [Icon by chopupboys]

[the-all-mighty-warden]

꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷ I HAVE ARRIVED ꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷

WELL LET'S SEE WHAT'S GOIN' ON HERE!!! I, Banhammer, THE warden of Banlands have come to grace y'all with my presence! Ya guys should be thankin' me, really! When I ain't doin' my warden duties I'll be here on this silly little platform for you mortals and fuckin' 'round! SO COME ON DOWN AND TALK TO THE GREATEST WARDEN EVER!

⛓ JAILHOUSE RULES, MORTALS ⛓ - Ya really curious about m'horny life? Well I'll answer! - Keep it nice, mkay? I ain't toleratin' no disrespect in my domain! - DON'T MAKE ME HANG YA UP IN A CAGE, GOT IT? If I don't want ya 'round, I'll make sure ya don't stay 'round. - I'LL ADD MORE LATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-> It's me, ya boy, Star, back at it again with another parody blog. This is now my like... 7th? Lmao I'm not mentally well haha I'm soooo okay!!! -> Anyways, all of my other blogs' rules apply to this one as well!!! So just please keep that in mind, okay? I don't ask for much!!! Just be respectful and I'll be respectful back!!! -> I'll be showing off a lot of my own Banhammer hcs here! So please be respectful of that as well since I don't really play him super close to canon! -> Any and all interactions are welcomed!!! -> IC answers will be in Purple -> OOC answers will be Colorless -> Lore/HCs post here -> Enjoy your stay in Banlands :D

[the-all-mighty-warden]

I am the Mac and cheese wizard assistant, tumblr faction, come with Mac and cheese for your troubles. Windforce didn’t seem to appreciate the gift, so you get better tasting ones.

Flies away dramatically

"Sweet! More free food!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

ban hammer! are you gay?

"SURE AM!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

"workin' on that- uh- have a nice day then!!"

-🧹 anon

"You as well, stranger!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

"like just... anyone seem more angry than they usually are? Or seen a little red.... Ttthing around?"

-🧹 anon

-> Ban hums and scratches at his chin. He was thinking, trying to recall if he's seen anything strange lately. "Uh... Can't say I've seen anythin' strange happenin'.... Ya might wanna ask the deities..."

[the-all-mighty-warden]

slides in

"hhhheeeyyy dear wardeeeennn- have y' seen anyone feeling extra... Hate-filled, recently?"

-🧹 anon

"Huh? Whattya mean?"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

no reason scurries away

-medkit simp anon

-> The warden just stands there in pure confusion.

[the-all-mighty-warden]

have you seen a certain green healer

-medkit simp anon

"Kit? Yeah, I've seen 'im. What about 'im?"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

waves

-> He cocks up an eyebrow. "Ya need somethin'?"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

merry christmas to you n your momma

"Thank ya!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

(OOC: yes lol)

YEAH I FIGURED IT OUT. AGAIN. YIPPIE.

[the-all-mighty-warden]

(OOC: I thought the specific date I mentioned would’ve been a hint considering it has relevance to something that happened recently lol)

Uhhhhh My first thought was "Prism" bc I don't really know anyone else who does "OOC:" in anon messages

[the-all-mighty-warden]

happy late spawnday! gods I would’ve said this sooner but my memory issues are a pain, sorry-

anyways, here’s this-

(mod gets to determine what he got, also I would’ve sent this on the 9th like I originally intended to if not for how fast I forget things and how slow I am to remember them sometimes 😭)

— a certain mutual

-> The warden wasn't expecting a plushie as a gift for his glorious spawnday! But he accepted it, finding it oddly cute... "Thank ya, stranger! I don't mind gettin' late spawnday gifts n wishes!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

HAPPY (LATE) SPAWNDAY!!

(Gives you a lot of food. I know you’re a big back.. /hc)

-> The warden chuckles and happily accepts the food from you. "Thank ya!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

happy spawnday unless I've been lied to and it's not!!

"M'spawnday was yesterday! But I appreciate the spawnday wishes!"

[the-all-mighty-warden]

really? so deities can get away with murder but mortals get imprisoned for their unjustified crimes? 🤔📝

"I mean... I can't do nothin' against the deities. That's grandmama's job." -> "Grandmama"?

[the-all-mighty-warden]

theoretically what would you do if a certain moth commited murder? :3

"Uh... He can do whatever he wants?"