Welcome to my personal shithole

I thought I changed this 29 apparently fucking not I lost my majestic writing previously so now it's going to be trash fuck you Paige hex on you every time you type, speak, sign, or even think anything about me to another person, or just generally have the "she gave me PTSD!" vibe because you won't accept your own accountability lmao I like writing but it's tiring Working on healing my voice I want to be kind, not nice.

[maureen2musings]

Steven Cordes

[the-words-she-said]

My joints crack, a dull ache lingers in my hips.

A breathe in,

A breathe out.

Pain doesn't feel like pain, unless it's different.

Then the tears fall, not knowing where to go.

Find comfort in the pain if you are able.

Take comfort when it's over.

[the-words-she-said]

Tonight,

I cannot sleep. Exhaustion will force its hand at some point, and I lay here trying to keep busy.

My heart feels abandoned. My brain cannot connect the evidence. Courage and vulnerability doesn't mean anything if time keeps proving that every time you show it, it means everything is ripped away.

How am I supposed to trust, connect, heal when I keep getting told that I can't have a close relationship when I'm honest?

How can I even trust myself?

Do I even deserve to?

I don't know.

[corrodedparadox]

Fig. 1

[the-words-she-said]

Screaming, cradled in fear.

Face to floor, begging over and over: Please let me back in

It was like the connections snapped, a door slamming shut.

Letmegobackletmepleasepleaseletmebackinplease

I couldn't understand

I couldn't watch

I couldn't speak

I had no sight, no sound, no voice, and still- Never got to breathe, never got to stabilize.

"If you're going to disrespect me by taking off your glasses and hearing aids, you can get the hell out"

If I got to sit down on a couch, if I got to lay down in bed, if I went outside? I don't remember. I think it was the couch.

I was so scared. So pathetic. So overwhelmed. So tired.

[the-words-she-said]

I grew up with nightmares, sometimes for weeks on end.

For a while,

I thought it was over, then it started again.

For a while,

I accepted that they were going to be there, and did everything I could to stop them.

For a while,

It worked. Until it didn't.

I thought I was safe, that my body would no longer be tormented.

It's only been a week, and now I find myself afraid to fall asleep, anxiety building up in my chest, fearing the dreams I may have tonight.

I guess,

For a while,

Sleep won't be something to look forward to, instead of living.

Maybe forever.

They returned.

[ex0skeletal-undead]

Lady Skell by UmbHowl

This artist’s Linktree

[remanence-of-love]

[bubbly-redhead1]

I hope…

[titsay]

baby blue

[aidashakur]

[the-words-she-said]

When this hits close to home.

[missinyouiskillingme]

You can love someone and still choose to say goodbye to them. You can miss someone every day and still be glad they are no longer in your life.

[foxeia]

Izzy Dilger

[neckkiss]

[excdus]

[bled]

[slo-dan]

[methexys]