Benedict, Richard & Henry Arnold

[thebrothersarnold]

“And i’ll be happy to see them. I don’t get to see you boys enough, now that you’re all grown up with your own lives. I miss you all.” Ben wanted to be able to see his son’s more often. But they all had their own lives and responsibilities now, they weren’t the young boys he had raised anymore. Besides, he couldn’t exactly come to them. Just getting to his eldest had been more of a struggle than he would care to admit.

“You never realize how much it hurts. You have an idea of what it’s like, you hear stories about it. But there’s nothing that can compare to actually getting shot.” He knew that his son’s leg was no doubt badly infected at this point. Even if he lost his leg, he could still lose his life. Benedict didn’t know that it would be worth the risk. “I would take you in without hesitation, Ben, whether Peggy wants me to or not. I’m old now, she’ll give me just about whatever I want.” He joked a bit. “I wish I could give you a definite answer. If I were in your shoes…I would take the risk. You could lose your leg and still… Or you could continue to be sick and hope for the best while keeping your leg. This isn’t an easy decision.”

“I’m not… I won’t miss out on their accomplishments. But that doesn’t change that you’re my son and I love you. To lose you would be devastating, Ben, you have to understand that.” It broke his heart to hear that his son was dreaming of his first wife. There probably wasn’t much time left. “If your mother wants you to go with her.. Well, I could never say no to her so you’re already better off than I am.” He was desperate to lighten the mood a bit. “I know you’re tired. But you need to make the choice, I can’t make it for you.”

“We miss you too, but we understand why you can’t stay with us, we’ve always understood.”  Ben had gotten used to his father only being around a few weeks out of the year as a child.  His mother and aunt had explained it to him and he’d done his best to help his brothers come to terms with it as well.  The three brothers were a tight-knit group and Ben had enjoyed his role as a surrogate father over the years, but as Benedict had said, they were grown now, and the role he used to play wasn’t needed anymore.

“It’s awful,” Ben agreed, “I don’t think I know the words to describe it, but this...the way it feels now, it’s almost worse.  There’s no relief, nothing even takes the edge off and it’s constant, I can’t even escape it when I sleep.”  He let a half smile cross his features before he started internally debating the issue in his head again.  If he had the surgery it was still quite likely he would die, and if he didn’t he would have to depend on his family’s charity to survive, but if he didn’t have it, he was certain he would be dead before the week was out.  “I’ll do it,” he finally said, “but I want you to write Peggy and ask her anyway, if she truly doesn’t want me staying with you, I’m sure Aunt Hannah would take me in again, I don’t want to intrude on your new family.”

“I miss her,” Ben said, his voice barely above a whisper, “I always thought I’d recovered from losing her, but I miss her so much, and I wish she was here with us so we could be a family again, even just for a few minutes.”  It was a childish wish, but if he could have anything in the world, that would be it.  “I want to go with her, but as long as I have the choice to walk away, I’m going to.”

He was about to have someone summon the doctor for him when something occurred to him.  “There are some things you need to know, just in case I don’t make it.  No one can ever find out about this, but Henry is not at all interested in women, he prefers men.  You need to know because he’s terrible at being discreet and he might need you to throw people off his his scent like I’ve been doing.  Also, Richard is planning to elope soon, her name is Anna Howard and she’s probably around three months along by now, but no one else knew about it the last I heard.  And while I’m getting you up to speed, there’s a girl that I love, her name is Kate, if I don’t make it tell Richard to write to her, she deserves to know what happened to me.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“I just wish I could have gotten here sooner.” Benedict had spent a fully day arguing with Peggy about the journey. It wasn’t much of a fight, really, but there were plenty of reasons for him not to make the trip. His own health had begun to fail him and he didn’t have the same strength that he used to. Plus, there had been no guarantee that his son would even be alive when he arrived which would mean that the lonh journey would end up being for nothing at all. In the end, he’d packed up and gotten on the first ship he could. He’d be damned if he was going to let his own son suffer alone.

“I know you are, Ben, and that’s okay.” He promised, brushing a few hairs from his son’s forhead. The fever was practically radiating from him by now. There was a growing feeling in Benedict’s gut that this would be the end, but he tried to push that feeling down. “I still remember how scared I was. Getting shot isn’t something that you ever think will happen to you, and then it does and suddenly…suddenly there’s so many things you might never get to do again. But you’ll get through this. Your old man could do it and so can you.”

He could feel a lump in his throat at his son’s words. “Don’t…Ben, don’t you dare start talking like that. You can lose your leg and keep your life, there’s still a chance. I know I have other son’s but that doesn’t matter, damnit. They can’t just replace you, or whatever it is your thinking in your mind. This isn’t…it’s not the end.” While they were words that would have normally been filled with anger, now they were only trying to hold back sadness.

“It’s alright, you’re here now.”  He didn’t say it, but he and his brothers had been discussing their father’s health lately, and they’d come to the conclusion that Henry would visit his father’s home and offer to stick around to help, but those plans had been put on hold at the moment.  “Richard and Henry were here earlier, but I told them to go back and get some sleep, they’ll be happy to see you too.”

“I didn’t...I didn’t realize how horrible it felt, you think you know what pain is, but you really have no idea, and I didn't think it could get any worse, but it hurts more now than it did when it first happened, I can feel it, like the pain is coursing through my whole body.” He turned his head away from his father and coughed, noting internally that he didn’t taste blood this time, so that was good, but the effort still left him gasping for breath for a moment before he was able to turn back and continue their conversation.  “You think I should do it then? You might have to take me in if make it, do you think Peggy would alright with that?” Ben didn’t really have anything against his father’s new wife, but she was only 8 years older than he was and the two had never really figured out how to act around each other.

“I’m just trying to be realistic, I’m the oldest, but the others, they’re just as capable as I am, I not asking you to replace me, but don’t miss out on their accomplishments, they’re all going to be great men.”   He stared up at the ceiling of the tent, unsure whether or not he should say anything about this, but if his father thought he could survive, maybe it was alright.  “I keep dreaming about Mama, she wants me to go with her, and I want to, but I always wake up before I do, I just...I don’t know how much longer I can fight, I’m so tired.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

The moment Benedict got the letter about his son he arranged to travel to be by his side. He could remember his own injury like it was yesterday and he was terrified for his first born. He had been one of the lucky ones; he got to keep his leg and his life. But he wasn’t stupid, either. He knew the risks and he’d seen enoigh men lose their life to injuries more minor than his own. The thought that he might lose his son… It was unbearable.

Traveling wasn’t exactly easy for him, though. Ben no longer had the same strength he had in his youth and he longed for it most days. Now he relied heavily on his cane and it was becoming increasingly more frequent for him to have to stay in bed all day because his leg wasn’t able to handle any weight at all. But he would be damned if he didn’t go and see his son.

He hobbled up to the bed where his son was lying and called for a chair so that he could sit beside him and take his hand. “Oh, my boy, my son, what a predicament you’re in. You know the saying like father like son doesn’t have to be taken to literally, don’t you?” He was trying to tease to lighten the mood but it killed him to see his son like this. “Ben, listen, you’re burning up, your leg is infected. I… I was very, very lucky all those years ago. Few men are able to survive something like this. I would rather have a son with one leg than no son at all.”

Ben let out a small laugh, but the mirth didn’t quite reach his eyes.  “I’ve always wanted to be just like you, I guess I took it a little too far this time.”  He closed his eyes for a moment, he didn’t want to fall asleep when his father had just arrived, but the fever made it hard for him to focus and the pain made it even worse.

“I’m glad you’re here, I wasn’t sure if the letter got to you or if it was even sent, I just...I needed to see you.”  Ben was a soldier, he was a strong person who made hard decisions and was well on his way to being a General one day, and it wasn’t easy for him to admit how he was truly feeling right now.  “I...I’m scared.”  It came out as more of a whisper than anything, but it was sincere, he was terrified.  Terrified of losing his leg and therefore his career, terrified that he would have no choice but to move in with his father’s new family and be forced to be cared for for the rest of his life, he didn’t want any of it, he wanted his life to be back on track. 

Unfortunately, the change in his physical condition wasn’t the scariest thing he was facing.  A great deal of time had passed while he waited for his father to arrive and he was worried that too much damage had been done, he’d been feeling sicker and weaker every time he woke up and he’d started to dream about his mother, which made him feel that death was closing in.  “It may not be worth the doctor’s effort,” he said, “and you have other sons, sons who love you and will bring honor onto our family’s name, I’ve done the best I could, but this might be the end of my story.”

[thebrothersarnold]

Ben had heard the stories of his father’s heroism in the war more times than he could count, and he’d always told himself that if one day he was injured in battle, he would do as his father did and fight as long and hard as he could. Of course, saying that was one thing, but when Ben took a bullet to the leg, just as his father had, he realized that he wasn’t as strong as he’d hoped he would be.  

It was a bad injury, his leg was shattered and the doctors were all trying to convince him to get it amputated, but Ben refused. He was in excruciating pain, drifting in and out of consciousness and burning with fever due to the infection forming in his wound. In a moment of lucidity he begged one of the nurses to write to his father for him and ask him to come, he didn’t want to lose his leg, but he didn’t want to die either, so he waited for his father to come so he could talk it out with him or have his father make the decision for him if he wasn’t able to do it himself.

He didn’t know how much time had passed when his father finally arrived, but Ben was thrilled to see him.  “Papa...” Ben hadn’t called him that in years, but in this position he felt like a child again, “they want to take my leg,” he said weakly, “I don’t know what to do. What should I tell them?” 

@americantraitor

[americantraitor]

"My temperature's almost 101. Holy shit.."

@thebrothersarnold

Benedict was immediately concerned when his youngest son told him about his high fever. Fevers were never good, and in some cases they were even deadly. “I’ll draw you up a cold bath and then you can lie down and rest.” It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

[thebrothersarnold]

Benedict ran a hand over his face and took a moment to think. He wasn’t going to reveal how he’d found out about his son’s…tendencies to prefer dating men over women. In all honesty, he didn’t really understand it. But no matter what Henry was still his son and he still cared about him. Besides, even if he did care, his worry over his son being sick was taking center stage at the moment. “I know it is, it’s never easy to find someone. I just…what if something happens to you, Henry? I know you want to make a good impression and you want to go see this, uh, guy, but don’t you think you should focus on getting better?”

Henry didn’t quite meet his father’s eyes when he looked up, he was still a little embarrassed that something he’d tried so hard to keep hidden was obvious enough that his father knew about it, but he was making a good point.  “I guess I can take the chance that I’ll see him somewhere else, we probably shouldn’t be meeting up during the day where people can see us anyway.”  In all honesty, he did feel like hell and the only reason he had been planning to go was that he hadn’t thrown up in a few hours, since he hadn’t been able to eat anything.  “I am tired, maybe getting a little sleep would help and I can find him tomorrow.  You won’t…you won’t say anything to anyone, will you? The less people that know, the better.” 

[americantraitor]

"My temperature's almost 101. Holy shit.."

@thebrothersarnold

Benedict was immediately concerned when his youngest son told him about his high fever. Fevers were never good, and in some cases they were even deadly. “I’ll draw you up a cold bath and then you can lie down and rest.” It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

[thebrothersarnold]

He stepped forward to grab his son’s arm without hesitation when he stumbled. Benedict knew that of the three boys from his first marriage, his connection with Henry was the weakest. It was his own fault, of course, there had been a war to fight and he knew that it wasn’t something he would be able to avoid for forever. Now, however, he wanted nothing more than to care for his son. “Henry, please.” His hand moved to rest on his son’s shoulder. Ben was aware that he was begging now, but he didn’t care. “I’m sure that if whoever you’re meeting is anyone decent, he’ll understand you putting your health first. Please just stay home.”

He was about to protest again, though more halfheartedly than before when something his father said caught his attention.  He tried his hardest to keep his interested in men as private as possible, as he didn’t want people finding out and locking him up for being “immoral” or whatever it was they called it.  He wasn’t totally sure how his father knew he was interested in men, but he was a bit surprised that it didn’t seem to be something he was worried about.  “It’s not easy to find someone,” Henry said quietly, “I don’t want to miss my chance, he could meet someone else, someone better, someone who actually shows up and then I’ll never see him again, all because I got a little bit sick.” 

[americantraitor]

"My temperature's almost 101. Holy shit.."

@thebrothersarnold

Benedict was immediately concerned when his youngest son told him about his high fever. Fevers were never good, and in some cases they were even deadly. “I’ll draw you up a cold bath and then you can lie down and rest.” It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

[thebrothersarnold]

“You don’t have this high of a fever and vomit when you have a cold!” Out of all of his children, Henry had inherited his stubbornness. Now he understood why people had always gotten so angry with him when he used to act this way. “Who are you meeting tonight that’s so important? Just try to reschedule it, please, I don’t want you to end up so sick you have to go to the hospital.”

Henry crossed his arms, not backing down.  Though he loved his father very much, they hadn’t really spent a huge amount of time together over the years, as his father had been busy with the Army, and he didn’t really feel as though his father had any real authority over him.  “Just someone I’m…interested in,” he was not going into detail right now, he’d met the young man earlier in the week and they’d made these plans, and Henry didn’t want him to move on if he didn’t show up.  “I’m going out,” he said, glaring, “Don’t wait up.”  He meant that to sound final, but his knees buckled under him and he staggered before standing up straight, but not turning back to face his father.

[americantraitor]

"My temperature's almost 101. Holy shit.."

@thebrothersarnold

Benedict was immediately concerned when his youngest son told him about his high fever. Fevers were never good, and in some cases they were even deadly. “I’ll draw you up a cold bath and then you can lie down and rest.” It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

[thebrothersarnold]

“Oh right, of course, because throwing up everything and a high fever and dizziness are totally normal!” The sarcasm in his voice was extremely obvious. “Henry, you can reschedule plans. Your health needs to come first.” Ben was always an anxious father and constantly worries about whether he was raising his kids the best he could or not. But when one of them was sick or hurt - even though some of them were grown - he worried even more.

“Totally normal,” Henry said back, he was incredibly stubborn when he wanted to be and the last thing he wanted to do was sit around in bed all day when he could be out in the city with his friends. “I’m fine, maybe I have a cold or something stupid, but there’s no reason to ruin my entire weekend for nothing.  I’m supposed to be meeting…someone…tonight, I don’t want to ruin my chances by not showing up, so I’m going.” 

[americantraitor]

"My temperature's almost 101. Holy shit.."

@thebrothersarnold

Benedict was immediately concerned when his youngest son told him about his high fever. Fevers were never good, and in some cases they were even deadly. “I’ll draw you up a cold bath and then you can lie down and rest.” It wasn’t a request, it was an order.

[thebrothersarnold]

“I’m fine,” Henry said, rolling his eyes, “I don’t really even feel sick, just a little warm but also freezing, and everything is a little fuzzy, and I’m kind of dizzy.”  He paused for a moment and then continued, “and I haven’t kept any food down since yesterday, but other than that I’m totally fine.  There’s no reason I can’t go out today, I’ve got plans.” 

[ohmybillskarsgard]

[thebrothersarnold]

“Hey! I’m old, but i’m not that old! Besides, rocking chairs are uncomfortable. If you’re going to set me up like that at least threat your old man well and get me a nice, stuffed chair.” Benedict suggested. “Eh, they won’t get too far. Peggy spoils these boys. There isn’t a day that goes by that they don’t eat well. They won’t survive without her cooking, I think.”

“I don’t miss those days, if i’m being honest with you. Playing soldier has its perks, but the food and the living conditions aren’t on the list.” His face lit up at his son’s news, something that was easily seen even despite the dim lighting. “Are you really?! Ben, that’s fantastic! Congratulations! It’s a good thing everyone else is asleep, because you know i’m not going to be able to keep this a secret for long.”

“You’re right, when we inevitably have to put you in some kind of a home, we’ll make sure it’s one with good chairs, it’s the least we can do for you.”  Ben smiled, “That’s good though, she loves them and they’re well taken care of, that’s what’s important.”

“I like being a soldier, I do, but coming home and being with the family and having a chance to relax and let my guard down a little is the best.  I need this time to get my head back on straight.”  He laughed, “I know, but I was tired of keeping it to myself, I’m glad you were awake so I could tell someone about it.  Richard and Henry have met her, but if I can convince her father, she’ll come back here with me to meet everyone and then we’ll sort out the wedding details.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“Okay, maybe I’ll think about being a soldier again when I’m old enough.” He laughed softly. “I really hope the army doesn’t send you away for super long this time. I wanna see you more, and meet the girl you’re going to marry! Will you quiet the army once you get married or no? Will you live here or in Canada?”

“Well, we’ll be with you when you do, us Arnold men have to stick together after all, that’s what brothers are for.”  Ben smiled, he had forgotten how much he enjoyed spending time with his much younger siblings, he was closer to Richard and Henry, just because they had all grown up together, but he liked the younger ones quite a bit as well.  “I think we’ll probably settle in Canada in the end, that’s where her family lives and I already own a home there, but I’m sure we’ll get back here quite often.  That’s enough about me though, what have you been up to lately?” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“How high do you have to rank until you get your own tent? And Dad being a General would really help? That’s pretty cool!” Of course, this was all still a few years away, so Edward wasn’t worrying too much, but it was still interesting to think about. “You’ll be back in a few weeks with her? Really? It won’t be a few more years again?” He sounded so excited, but also hesitant to get his hopes up. “That would be so cool! I’d really like to meet her! If she’s marrying you, I bet she’s perfect!”

“Whatever kind of connections you can make are going to be helpful, and by the time you’re old enough to get there, Richard and I will be high enough in the ranks for us to help you get through as well. I don’t know what the exact rank is, but you’ll do well because you’re an Arnold.”    “That’s the plan, though it’s all going to depend on what the Army says, I wouldn’t get married to anyone before I brought her home to meet the family, I have to get your approval before anything is set in stone.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“You’re right, that wouldn’t have gone well at all. You probably would have given me a heart attack, i’m too old for you to be pulling stunts like that on me.” He joked. “Although I guess I should probably get in the habit of locking the door. It seems any random solider could just come walking in.”

“Fair enough. Don’t worry, though, you’ll be well fed in the morning. Peggy is already preparing to make a huge breakfast for all of us. It’ll be nice for you to have a home cooked meal, I know I always missed that when I served.” He told him, reminiscing a bit. “I’m very happy to have you home, even if it is for such a short time. Will you be staying in Canada then, or will they send you off yet again?”

“You’re right, and at your age the last thing I’d want to do is startle you too much, we should probably just set you up in a rocking chair with a blanket on your lap and let you just look out the window at the scenery for a while.”  He laughed, “That would probably be smart though, if not just to keep people out, but you’ve got little kids in this house, you should probably keep it locked so they don’t make a break for it.” 

“I can’t wait, it’s been so long since I had some real food that wasn’t only half cooked over a fire by someone I wouldn’t trust to feed a dog properly.”  Ben ran his hand through his hair, glad to be rid of the wig they made him wear while he was in the field, “I think the plan is to stay in Canada.  I’m actually…well, I was going to wait and announce it to everyone in the morning, but…I’m planning on getting married when I get back.  I need to convince her father, but she wants to marry me and I’m pretty sure I’m close to breaking him.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“Ugh, you have to do that? I don’t know if I can be in the military.” Edward said, only half-teasing. “I think Dad might have mentioned that, that’s really cool! When are you getting married? What’s she like?”

“You do until you rank high enough, our father doesn’t have to share with anyone, and one day I’ll get there myself.  We’re the children of a General, we’re better off than most when it comes to the Army.”  He smiled, “It probably won’t be for a while yet, there’s a lot to organize and I haven’t been around much, but she lives in Canada, so I’ll be back with her in a few weeks.”  Again, he debated how much to tell his younger brother, “We haven’t spent a lot of time together, but she’s very pretty and very nice, I’m looking forward to seeing her again soon.  I’ll bring her back with me the next time I come home and you can meet her then, I’m sure you’ll like her very much.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“I really hope I can always have my own room. Now that I do, I don’t think I can ever share a room with one of them again.” Edward admitted. “I like being able to have somewhere to go by myself, and it’s just my own space. It’s the best.”

“Yeah, I miss those days, these days I’m sharing a tent with 5 other soldiers, but when I’m back in Canada I’ll in my own house, and I’ll have a room to myself, at least until I get married.”  He smiled, “Did you know I was getting married, by the way?  I never know what letters I’ve written have made it here or not.” 

[thebrothersarnold]

“Yeah, that’s true. I was just asking.” He shrugged. “I really like this house! I mean, the other one was good and I really liked the old house too, but this one is way bigger! I actually have my own room in this one, so that’s really fun.”

Had Edward been a little older, Ben probably would have told him all about what he’d done as a soldier, but he was still fairly young and he didn’t think his parents would appreciate that, so he let the subject drop.  “That’s the best, isn’t it? I always got a room to myself for being the oldest too.  I don’t know how many children our father and your mum are planning on having, but if they don’t have too many more, you’re probably going to always going to get that.”