The Ginger Semite

You always wonder why you left this shithole... until you come home, that is. ((Independent Kyle blog. Art isn't mine.))

[whoreylambskin-blog]

thegingersemite

// roleplaying can be really frustrating when you see a lot of people getting interactions when you don’t get a lot; i know the feels. the only way i’m ever able to find characters i’m good at writing is by having a shit ton of rp blogs and seeing which ones click with me and...

[thegingersemite-blog]

Maybe I need a new muse. Maybe I need to figure out a way to work writing into my schedule on my own. I don't know.

Either way, I'm going to step back from Tumblr for a while. Honestly, I hate this website. I hate the sort of people it fosters, I hate what it does to groups of friends, I hate seeing people get manipulated and hurt because of the actions of some. I've found great friends on Tumblr too. But I'm just.. Too old to deal with this crap.

So if anybody cares or needs me, I'm on Kik at windweaver1092 and Skype at thechoicestofplushrumpusasses and I'll gladly talk and rp on there.

[thegingersemite-blog]

[elvenking]

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

i know.

[thegingersemite-blog]

I wish I knew the right thing to do.

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

sure?

[thegingersemite-blog]

Okay.

I love you. You know that, right?

[pistolbrain-blog]

Pardon me for being irrational. Pardon me for telling Kyle that I appreciate everything he’s done for me. I’ve told him a million times over that I appreciate what he’s done to help me. I’d never take such a thing in vein, so don’t pretend as if I’m brushing it off and pretending it never happened. Yes. It hurts to leave Kyle. But I need to do this, and no one will change my mind. May I be selfish for once? May I want something for myself for once in my life? May I want to not sit around on the sidelines while the love of my life is taken away from me, again? After having everything taken from me in my childhood and bullied to the point where everyone forgot my death even HAPPENED, May i be selfish? For ONCE in my life, can I not want one thing taken from me? Pardon me for being so selfish, then. And my sincerest apologies, I’ll let Damien go on his own, while I sit to rot without him. I’ll live an unfulfilled life, completely dead inside. 

[thegingersemite-blog]

That isn't what I want and you know it.

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

can’t sleep.

[thegingersemite-blog]

Oh.. Want to hug?

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

why?

[thegingersemite-blog]

Nothing. Never mind. Sleepy?

[thegingersemite-blog]

but i do think he's right that you can't make his choices for him. and you shouldn't try to - if he doesn't care enough about what you were willing to do just to be able to talk to him, let alone never defending you to damien, then maybe he isn't worth that.

You're wrong. He is worth it. I screwed up when we were young, and he has a right to be upset about that. If he's still upset, then clearly I haven't done enough to show him how sorry I am and how much he means to me.

[thegingersemite-blog]

for what it's worth, i think pip is being really unfair and really selfish. he doesn't seem to care at all about what you were willing to give up for him, and all that you've tried to do for him since he came back. yes you made a mistake when you were a kid - we all did though. and i for one didn't try to fix it, but you have genuinely tried to make him feel like part of a family again. if he cared he'd appreciate that.

That really doesn't make me feel better.

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

thought sighing was natural?

[thegingersemite-blog]

I was worried.. that you were upset.

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

I guess?

[thegingersemite-blog]

You sighed..

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

yes?

[thegingersemite-blog]

Is everything okay?

[phlegmatichullo-blog]

.

[thegingersemite-blog]

..Hi.

[pistolbrain-blog]

..We’ll be busy, Kyle. Death isn’t exactly a vacation, you know. Damien has duties to fulfill. 

[thegingersemite-blog]

But this would let you travel back and forth immediately, with no waiting period, so when you're free and he's got a few days off, you can come home to the people who love you.

It won't be permanent. We can talk. You can tell me about your day and come home for Rosh Hashana to see Ma and Ike and all your friends here.

I know you think this life is mundane and it's not fancy compared to being the boyfriend of the prince of hell, but people still love you here, Pip. I told you I would try to find an alternate solution. This is the best I can do.

Please.

[pistolbrain-blog]

[thegingersemite-blog]

And he can do his job and you can do yours. Satan takes vacations to Earth. I'm just asking him to give you the same option.

You're my family. I have to try.

[thegingersemite-blog]

So you're giving up a year of your life to give them the ability to choose whether or not they contact you? That's rather presumptuous, Mr. Broflovski.

If he still decides not to ever text or come home, then it's my fault and my loss and you're not out anything, plus Damien gets to be a little more powerful a little earlier. It's a win-win for you. If he does decide to text me and come home, then it's a slightly more neutral tie-win.