what

Don't ask me what the hell I'm doing because I don't even know.

[catchymemes]

[coffeefocusrat]

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

[chungledown-bimothy]

bodies should have crash logs. why the fuck did that just happen.

[orivu]

youve died a thousand times before who caaares just climb out of this grave again & again &agaian & agaian & again & again & aga

[moveslikekeithrichards]

working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”

[moveslikekeithrichards]

other thrilling destructions of my vocabulary:

the kid who replaced his hard G sounds with soft ones, leaving me incapable of thinking of glasses as anything other than jlasses

kid who would holler "DID" any time she finished her work no matter how many times we told her to just raise her hand

kid who began her scary stories with "once a time" and her friend who began his with "paw time"

middle schooler i had during student teaching who pronounced magritte as "mah-gritty"

the kid who said "i got boogies comin out my nose" while sobbing and the kid who said "theres his puddle of cry" while describing a drawing, both of whom i think of when im crying

kid who said that if he was 80 he would get big and turn grandpa

kid who, for no reason in particular, would just say "like a little feet" as a standalone phrase in relation to nothing

edit how could i forget. the kid who got sneezed on and angrily said "whyd you blessyou on me"

[alchemic-incantations]

I open Tumblr. I post something that should be a diary entry. I close Tumblr. I open Tumblr after having it closed for 1.2 minutes. I reblog 176 posts in a row. I add tags of absolute gibberish to 7 of those. I close Tumblr. I open Tumblr I post yet another should-be diary entry. I close Tumblr. I open tu

[isabelopaque]

And don't forget to stay up til 3 am every night doing nothing productive for no reason every day for a month

[bat-luun]

[said with increasing amount of distress] i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this i got this

[starless-planet]

Me, age 10, doing an essay on the pharaoh’s curse for school: huh. So this archeologist that died and everyone thought it was because he disturbed the pharaoh’s tomb actually died because he used a rusty razor to shave and it infected a mosquito bite. I can see how people could come to that conclusion, but it is a bit silly

Me, today, shaving my mosquito bite-ridden legs: I must tread carefully lest I incur the pharaoh’s wrath

[armandology]

fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

[gaybichon]

LMFAO

[what-even-is-thiss]

It will get cold again eventually. The summer will not last forever. I’m not doomed to live in this unbearable heat for all eternity. <- said while gripping the countertop so hard that the tile is starting to crack

[notgreatbob]

''i wasted those years'' who cares. you lived the only life you could've lived in those moments

[inatcanids]

Red Fox (Vulpes vulpes)

Observed by irkuem, CC BY-NC

[foxpost-generator]

where the fuck did you get that

[cannibalchicken]

[naturalcomedian]

I did not come back on here to feel decrepit

[thegoodstuffisalwaystaken]

Holy fuck

[thegoodstuffisalwaystaken]

I feel like you'd doordash caution tape from there for obvious reasons

I SHOULD

[naturalcomedian]

Does that mean I can get the machete?

[thegoodstuffisalwaystaken]

NO