NSFW WARNING! I REBLOG SMUTS! MDNI! here to reblog allll my faves and share some amazing writers. maybe do a little writing of my own... noncommittal blurbs, most likely.
hiii idk what i'm doing here but if anyone comes across this page and is like "hmmm i wonder what they reblog but i don't want to scroll all the way down and don't know what to search the tags of their account for", here's a list of all the characters i've reblogged about :)
OKOK. i know youre a huge fan of jean loo but. i need to know your thoughts on ballcock. i may be the only bastard on earth who likes that lil guy and im begging and sobbing for people to yap abt it with,,,
i'm gonna be so fr... I DON'T HAVE THOUGHTS ON BALLCOCK 💔💔 he's definitely a little guy. definitely a... character in the game, for sure. i'm not sure what it is i'm supposed to think about him but i'm open to you going on about your adoration of him!
i'm nearing the end of rebel's arc and god it's so beautiful. subtle, but not to the extent where you can miss what they're talking about. i understand people being put off by their first impression, but i'll always encourage people to stick out their route at least until the near end. the difficulty of rebel's route makes sense when you learn why they are the way are, and it makes getting a friend/love ending all the more satisfying.
Receiving: WORDS OF AFFIRMATION, Quality Time, Physical Touch
🌙 - What’s their sleep schedule like?
goes back and forth between being really good to being absolute shit-- he's either up all night on his phone or something or he's out cold the moment he lays down
🎁 - How do they feel about their birthday/birthdays in general?
He thinks his is a big deal and everyone else's isn't (if he cares, he begins to see yours as important too, but not as important as his still)
🧑🦰 - Have they ever dyed their hair? Ever cut it themself?
His hair is naturally that blue (and the carpet does in fact match the drapes), he sometimes cuts it himself in a pinch, but usually he tries to convince others do to it for him (usually Barry)
🍷- How do they feel about alcohol?
Depends on whose getting drunk and how drunk they're getting-- he's all down to party, but if you make yourself look like a mess, he's gonna call you out on it
🗣️ - How do they handle public speaking?
He thinks he handles it amazing, and he does have the confidence! Too bad no one wants to hear what he has to say...
🎮 - What’s their favorite game?
I think he doesn't actually play games that often, but when he does it's something like GTA or if he found it, he'd love Parrapa the rapper
💓 - What are some signs they’ve fallen for someone? How do they show their affection?
The fact that he's looking at you or speaking positively about you at all is the biggest sign you've won Jean Loo over. Conversely, him being extra annoyed at you and acting kinda shitty is potentially one of the biggest signs he's fallen for you. You get stuck in his head in a way he can't shake and it pisses him off so you piss him off but he can't help but think about you CONSTANTLY and it's really messing up his brain and it feels like he's getting soft and turning into a simp so GO AWAY (you going away does not help-- he's still thinking about you)
Jean Loo is embarrassed by a great many things he shouldn't be, and wholly UNembarrassed about a great many things he should-- that said, he's embarrassed about looking like a dork or a failure, completely unaware that the things he does to avoid it either make him look more like a dork and a failure or just make him look like an asshole
🌱 - Do they have a green thumb or are they a plant killer?
He's actually pretty decent at caring for plants if he actually cared to-- I can imagine post realization he has a ficus or something that he's tending to at home so he has something in his life that's not lifeless and withering (unlike his will to live), but as a toilet, he wouldn't bother
📱 - What social media do they use the most?
All of it and it's a terrible idea cause he likes to play keyboard warrior and mostly just ends up looking stupid smh
👪 - What’s their relationship with their parents like?
Hm. HMM. .....fuck, I really don't know??? Uh--- probably not great?? I mean, we know objects CAN have parents or even be parents (Hello Hank 5), but do they always have parents??? I think if he does have parents, he probably doesn't talk to them much anymore... I think either they're disappointed or he's just worried they will be-- either way no one calls each other
🐒 - What’s their favorite animal?
He says shark and he does love sharks, but the actual answer is probably some kind of weird fish that old people who really like fish and the ocean would know about. Either something really pretty, something really cool or something really interesting that he relates to in a weird way-- or potentially all three! Unfortunately I'm a bird person so I don't know fish well enough to tell you what that fish is so let's go with shark (if Jean Loo was a bird he'd probably be a seagull tho)
🧳 - What countries have they been to?
Just America and I guess France?? He's french, how does that work??? was he made in France then?? does that mean all our dishes are from Japan?? HOW DOES THIS WORK??? (he maybe went to Canada at some point during his very short lived rap career, but he probably hated the way they spoke french there so when he left he swore he'd never go there again)
🤔 - What’s something they’ll never understand?
Country music. Looking at you Johnny... (I know Elvis is rock, but he's very yeehaw and thus so is Johnny)
🎨 - What’s their favorite color?
Blue, usually in a pretty bright shade. Not quite a cyan, maybe more of a cerulean?? def a little lighter than Cobalt-- maybe more of a manganese blue??? IDK I'M GETTING TOO INTO SHADES OF BLUE NOW and all of them change-- a lightish vibrant blue, robin's egg, IDK
☂️ - How do they feel about rain?
Pretty positive actually. On the nerd end it's part of the water cycle which he thinks is impressive that nature can do that, on the rapper side and little ran on a video shoot or show can make shit feel dramatic (or it can wash it all out which isn't the best but HE likes it), and later on once he's realized it's sort of how he feels
🎶 - What’s a song they really like?
I think he actually has good taste in rap music, but he rarely shares and he can not copy those beats to save his life in his own music-- I think he also has good taste in other kinds of music, but a lot of the time he won't even listen to those
Music is one of the few places Jean Loo actually shines! Not making it obvs, but like-- knowing it and knowing how to find the good stuff. If he were more pretentious he could've made an amazing hipster
🖌️ - Do they have any hobbies?
So he literally says in his love route his old hobby is rap, and I think that's true, but I do also think he's good at like--- study?? like he's good at picking up info and keeping it in his head. whether is rappers or music or songs or random fun facts (I've read somewhere that he's canonically good at trivia?? source?? but also I could see it I could believe it) or knowledge on the ocean-- I think Jean Loo's other main hobby is studying?? But like-- not like he has glasses on and a text book on his desk kinda way, but in the wiki deep dive, 'it started with a quick google search and then I went down the rabbit hole and now I know everything one would ever want about this' kinda way. I think the sadly ironic thing is that Jean Loo is actually pretty smart, he's just too stupid to do anything with it.
💤 - What do they absolutely need to have to fall asleep?
I wanna say noises-- like ocean sounds or rain or something?? I could see him kinda needing a wave machine some nights to fall asleep
🎢 - Do they like amusement parks? What’s their favorite ride?
So I don't think he's ever been to one, and I think on some level he'd think they seem like dumb stuff for kids, but I think if he ever actually went he'd enjoy the heck out of it. I think he'd defo be a roller coaster guy and he will not REST until he wins a prize! He'll loose a lot of money, but he got that stuffie so who CARES!
🗺️ - What languages do they speak?
Obvs english and french-- maaaaaybe a little bit of spanish but it's probably awful
🍳 - How well can they cook?
Eh-- I think he starts as a pretty terrible cook, but eventually he actually gets really into being able to make something that's good?? Like he kinda can't settle with eating crappy food, so he just ends up learning how to cook so he doesn't have to. He's not about to get a job as a chef, or even a line cook, but he can make a decent meal. Nothing too fancy, but it's definitely better than most expect out of him. (Also I think if the time calls for it, he can get a little fancy with it. I do legit think one of Jean Loo's moves after realization if he ever cares enough about a romantic interest to actually want to impress them, IS to invite them over for dinner and make it kinda fancy. When push comes to shove and he's convinced your worth the effort to impress you, home boy CAN be impressive at least this one time)
🍪 - How well can they bake?
Fairly decently-- he can't make too too much, and he's never been one for anything too sugary, but he knows a few basic things and yes-- he can make fucking crescents please stop asking him about fucking crescents...
💘 - What do they find attractive about their partner(s)?
Confidence definitely. It doesn't have to be major swagger or bluster or anything, but if they show they have a backbone, or especially sass, even in a more quiet or mild mannered way, he gets kinda hype about it. Also he won't admit it fully, but being really patient and just generally kind actually does go a long way with Jean Loo. He's a massive fucking baby, and while he doesn't like to be talked down to or fully out right pitied (usually-- realized Jean Loo will fucking take pity at this point...), he does kinda need to be handled gently, especially where his ego is concerned. He does also like a bit or whit, or if they have a feisty side. Also someone whose decently supportive/interested in his passions. And maybe once he's gotten over himself a bit to finally make room for interest in you, he does like to see you passionate about something as well.
He kinda needs a lot in a partner, not for the reasons he thinks-- he's just a very needy guy honestly lol
👗 - How comfortable would they be wearing a skirt or dress?
I honestly kinda think no?? His ego is already so fragile, he's one of those dudes who can't handle being seen as too un-masculine. That being said, he would rock a dress. Too bad he's too caught up in his own shit to take any compliments at face value instead of hearing them as veiled insults and probably getting defensive smh
💝 - What gestures do they really appreciate? How do you get on their good side?
If you hear him out on his passions. That really gets you a long way. Let him info dump, but also engage with him about them-- he acts like he doesn't care and like he's doing you a favor by giving you attention, but the truth is he really thrives under that kind of attentiveness
☕ - Coffee or tea?
Coffee. He will only drink tea sometimes if it's given to him, but mostly he sees tea for grandmas and the british and he is neither
💀 - How do they feel about horror movies?
He acts like he can really handle them, and to some degree he can-- more main stream horror or slashers he can get down with, but show him something more actually gory or gruesome and 'haha, psh t-this looks so fake, what even is it h-haha' and then he can't sleep for the next week
🧸 - Do they have any stuffed animals? If so, are they decorative or do they sleep with them?
So I think no, he sees that as baby stuff and things virgin losers snuggle at night cause they can't get any (meanwhile he is a man baby virgin loser who can't get any) {also I'm writing a fic and he does get a plush in it eventually and it's his son low key so-- that's a thing}
💖 - How and how often do they try to impress their partner(s)? How and how often do their partner(s) impress them?
So he always tries to impress everyone all the time with his crapping (and fails), and like I said if he really wants to impress you he will invite you over for dinner and he'll actually try with this meal and it'll actually be quite the success! For how often you impress him-- it's more often than he will ever admit honestly, but it's occasional-- and it's weirdly usually something small but he's impressed all the same
🍽️ - What’s their favorite food?
Hmmm... Coffee and cigarettes. NO! No. I'm joking (not joking), uhhhhhhhhhhh--- either some kind of spicy chicken or shrimp
🧑🍼 - How do they feel about kids?
At first pretty negatively-- he'll say he has no space or patience for children, and at first he doesn't-- but kids actually grow on him pretty quickly?? Like at first he's telling them to get lost, and then like 15 minutes later they're low key his best bud (all while he's still saying they're just a dumb kid). A kid making friends with Jean Loo and Jean Loo trying to brush them off as they leave only for them to hug him real tight and tell him they'll have to play again real soon. ...Jean Loo's heart grew 3 sizes that day... also this is all other people's kids, please do not give this man his own kids or ask him to have kids HE SHOULD NOT BE HAVING KIDS AND HE DOESN'T WANT TO
🐾 - Do they have any pets?
He's thought about getting a fish... (both pre and post realization)
💬 - What are some filler/buffer words they use? (Like, um, etc.)
Yo yo yo yo (canon), okay okay okay okay (canon), Uhhh, and unironically oh lala in all it's many shades (also adding this here for the end lmao) (also no I don't have this stuff on my feed cause of Jean Loo, I speak some french and I'm always passively looking to get better)
🏳️🌈 - What do they identify as? What are their pronouns?
He/him probably bi or pan (my vote is for bi though)
🧑🤝🧑 - Do they have any siblings?
Nope, he's a bratty only child (said as a fellow bratty only child)
🥰 - What pet names do their partner(s) use for them? How flustered do they get by them?
I think he's more flustered by sentiment than by the actual names, but anything too cheesy or corny will actually embarrass him
also I don't have a specific name that I think a s/o would call him, so pick your poison on that one!
🌳 - What’s their extended family like?
I honestly don't think he has that large of a family, and even if he does, he doesn't really talk to them much any more if he ever really talked to them much at all (barely talks to his parents)
HELLOOOO TUMBLR, YOUR FAVOURITE JEAN LOO EXECUTIONER IS BACK ON THE WHEEL LETS GET THIS SHOW ROLLINGGG!!!!! I hope amir and jean loo beat eachother up more often and then kiss.
🃏 in the past 48 hours i have begun to go completely feral for parker bradley... thinking of writing a little something for him (smut it's gonna be smut)
the problem with calling inanimate objects “girl” is that once you start you cannot stop. I said “girl” to the dishwasher because that bitch would not close no matter how hard I whacked her pussy. what is wrong with me
🍸 Random Dateables + MC with Drinking Problems 😵💫
note: every time i drink i have so much fun, and then i cry out of shame and self-loathing when it's over. this series of headcanons is inspired by that, as well as other aspects of drunken behavior. nothing bad nor explicit in here, but feel free to scroll away!
🍺 I feel like Beverly would be the biggest enabler, especially considering her own relationship with alcohol. At least at first she would be, before she's made aware of how much worse alcoholism is for the human than her (picture her taking notes with watery eyes as Farya describes liver failure and kidney disease). Though hesitant to completely cut you off if you're just a 'fun drunk' like her, she'd still start watering down all of your drinks and would definitely ban you from her alcohol if you're a grouchy drunk or if you're just hitting the bottle way too much for even her liking.
🐻 Teddy would behave just as warmly as ever when you come to him in a drunk and rant-y mood. He would sit there calmly and sympathetically, listening to your woes even as you've got your arms/hands squeezing him way too tight in the hopes of transferring your pain and stress onto him. Though everything in him would yearn to comfort you with some sage advice, he'd know that you wouldn't be in the proper mindset to heed his words- so instead he'd weave a story that's just detailed enough to take your mind off of your self-deprecating thoughts until you exhaust yourself and fall asleep.
🛋️ The only thing that gets Koa more grumpy than forced conversation is drunken forced conversation. He never has the heart to visibly express his frustration when you trudge over to him with a bottle in your hand, nor does he ever have to courage to tell you to stop your rambling. He knows you don't do it out of malice, that he only suffers in moments like these because you're too drunk to get up the stairs (and don't want to be stuck in silence with your hurtful mind). Still, it's a hassle for him and he wishes he could just hold you against him forever- not just for his own peace of mind, but to stop you from eventually cycling back to your vices.
🚽 Jean Loo looks down on a lot of people for a lot of reasons, and you are no exception- especially in this circumstance. He wouldn't understand why you continue to drink when you know it'll bring you to him, hunched over with a queasy feeling that may or may not be followed by something undesirable. He wouldn't understand why you'd endlessly apologize to him while still pathetically hunched over, knowing that the moment would repeat itself sooner or later. Jean Loo would be an ass about your drinking during your moments of sobriety if you've ever 'sullied his domain', so to say, finding ways to make snide remarks about your weak stomach at the most random of moments ("you're looking pale, mon ami... jean-loo knows his c'rapping is sick, but if you are going to be, he suggests you do it in a paper bag this time."). However, if you manage to keep him clean while in a demeaning state, he'd be much kinder in his own way– showing uncharacteristic understanding for your rapping blunders and encouraging you to spend more time improving upon your "tolerable skill level" rather than doing "any other less desirable and self-disrespecting activity".
I saw that you want to write date everything characters👀
Do you have a list of characters that you don't feel comfortable to write? Just asking in case you don't like or feel uncomfortable writing for a certain character.
There are a handful of characters I haven't significantly progressed with yet and therefore won't immediately fill requests for due to a lack of knowledge. Off the top of my head those are Arma, Hiro-Hime, The Sassy Chap, Penelope, Jerry, Farya, Beau, the Geode [I can't recall their name but those who know will know], Textbox-chan, Rainey, Vaughn Trapp, Bodhi and Friar Errol, Ben-Hwa, Tydus, Cabrizzio, Ronaldini, Washford and Drysdale.
So far the only characters that I'm really not comfortable writing for are Doug, Stefan and Ben-Hwa. I do not want to write for Hoove as I'm not over getting hate-bombed by him. I've also heard things about Arma's route that have me hesitant to write for her (but the jury is still out) and I'm not sure how comfortable I'll be with Tina as I continue her route.
Every other character is one I'm willing to write for (though perhaps it's worth noting that characters like Rainey and Bodhi may take a little more time depending on the request, as I'm not too knowledgeable about their lingo and want them to come off as in-character if I write about them)!
i'm in the mood to write for the dateables but i don't just want to substitute my own ocxshipping content with "y/n"... i think y'all know what i'm asking for... my inbox is open....
[if you're interested, reblog for exposure/tag with the character you're interested in! i don't have the willpower to flood my own tags 😶🌫️]
i genuinely do not think jean-loo can fight. he'd be one of those "if you have to fight with fists you've already lost" kind of guys because he knows he can't throw nor take a punch with anyone over his height/weight, but he instigates like hell so i also think anyone who manages to wrangle him into a relationship would have to be very comfortable with at some point treating his bruises/black eyes and hearing him complain about his perfect porcelain surface being scuffed... and then later hearing him turn the encounter into a diss track. fun time, fun times.
