My 30th Birthday
...was supposed to be fun. I didn't even have super high expectations (or so I thought) but so so many things went wrong that it was really hard to focus on the good stuff.
I feel like the worst part of it was everyone telling me to not let it ruin things. Not to cry. Not to be upset.
But then my emotional cup kept getting filled up higher and higher and eventually it spilled over.
I'm mostly upset because I spent so much time and money on something that was supposed to be fun and felt like the universe was conspiring against me. Even when things started to level out, i was paranoid more stuff would go wrong.
And it's just super sad to want to forget about these experiences because of the embarrassment and disappointment. I know that time will heal all and the bad stuff won't feel so raw in a couple months, but i'm still sad now.







