Lorcan walked into his son’s room. He looked around and sighed, taking a seat on his bed. He remembered walking in with Lucy to tell him stories before bed when he was still a boy. Nick had a beautiful and bright smile as a kid and now all he saw of his son was the empty shell of what he used to be. He had lost his glow and it pained Lorcan. He remembered something his father had told him and Lysander once when they asked him why he had apologized to their mother when this time it wasn’t his fault. They had a long conversation with him that day and there was that one line that stuck to him the most to this day, “But in the end… Doesn’t it all come down to the love of a woman?”
He knew that was true, it was true especially for the Scamanders. Lorcan had noticed that, in the end they would give their all to the one they loved. They didn’t give up quite that easy, maybe here and there, a speed bump might rise and stop them in their tracks but in the end of it all, they kept trying. Even in the darkest times, he couldn’t picture life without Lucy. There were times he thought about it, but the thought would always leave him. He knew his son was like him in a lot of ways. And in a lot of ways he was the complete opposite. Lorcan ran his hand through his hair, he missed his little boy. Things changed after they lost Melanie. Lorcan and Lucy were selfish and hadn't even stopped to see how it affected him.
Now it was too late. Whenever they tried to get close to him, he'd shut them out. Mysti had broken his heart, ripped it out of his chest. He didn't blame the girl, but he wished that it hadn't affected Nick so much. Yet that's how it was, when Lucy became distant, he had stopped trying in a lot of things, he had lost motivation. He had just, he lost it for a while. When Lysander lost Roxanne, he had shut himself from the world as well from a while, hiding away from people. He didn't want to see his son this way. Lorcan stood up and took a seat at his desk, looking up at the pictures he had pinned. Suddenly memories struck him like lightning.
He was his little boy again. Only 8 years old. They used to go down by the lake together with a toy car that Nick used to love. He would never know how to control it so Lorcan would always have to show him. The way Nick looked up to his father like he was some sort of hero. Then when Nick got into Baseball, Lorcan forced himself to learn just so he could play with him and teach him, they would spend hours out in the backyard throwing the ball, making jokes and laughing. They would rough house and make fun of each other, they were so close it made Lorcan tear up at the thought of how distant they were now.
Nick was becoming a man and he didn't need him anymore. He was growing up and making his own choices now. He wanted to handle everything on his own and all Lorcan could do is stand in the side lines just in case he starts to stray from the right path. He would always be there for his son, no matter what, no matter how big or old he got. He remembered the way that Nick would often wake him up every Father's Day at midnight, he'd set up two plates in the dining room, always Oreos. Oreos were his favorite cookie, a glass of milk for the two of them and Lorcan knew he'd have to wait until the clock struck midnight. Then Nick would smile at him, his smile back when his front teeth were missing always melted Lorcan's heart. "Happy Father's Day daddy." Then he'd tear the cookie apart and lick the creme because heaven forbid he dipped before that. To this day, Nick still ate his cookies like that and whenever Lorcan saw, he'd just smile. Then he remembered the one day that he had fallen asleep waiting, he was so upset with himself, he hadn't came to wake Lorcan up. Lucy was out making breakfast as Lorcan was getting ready, he had finished shaving when he heard someone set a box down. It sounded like a wooden box outside the door. He opened it to find Nick standing on top of it, he then giggled and threw himself in his arms. "Happy Father's Day daddy!"
Then he remembered waking up to Nick being in between Lucy and Lorcan, he'd always scoot closer to him, whenever he had a nightmare, he would often sneak into their bed quietly. It never bugged him. He remembered opening his books to start his research and finding a picture in there randomly that Nick had drawn him, he had gotten his artistic talents from his mother of course, Lorcan had gotten a special album to put them in, to this day he still had every drawing that Nick ever made him. He then remembered when he had a fear of heights, he had climbed a tree to get his kite unstuck and then ended up screaming. Before Lucy could even get up, Lorcan had already raced out, when he saw him up in the tree clinging to the bark, Lorcan made sure to calm him.
"Jump. I'll catch you." Nick shook his head, he closed his eyes, "I'll fall." Lorcan just smiled, "I won't let you fall, do you trust me?" He nodded, "Then jump, I'll catch you." Nick looked down at him, hesitant, Lorcan held his arms out to him, then he jumped, quickly he caught him in his arms and then spun him around in the air, he held him in his arms afterwards and remembered that smile again as Nick clung to him. "I told you I'd catch ya kiddo." He kissed his head, "I know daddy, you're my hero." He had made sure that Nick wouldn't see him cry. In his Hogwarts years, Lorcan had done many things he regretted. After losing Lucy the first time, he stopped caring about school. He stopped trying, he had gotten with many girls and broke their hearts but in the end, in the end of it all, Lorcan knows he did well. He had Nick, that was the best thing about him. His son. He brought himself back to reality when he felt Lucy's arms around him. "You miss him don't you?"
He leaned against her and nodded, closing his eyes, "You have no idea..." She kissed the side of his head, "I think I have a slight idea... he's changed." Lorcan nodded, "He's growing up Luce." He stood up and looked at her, the house without him always seemed so empty. At least when he was home, he knew that he was in his room, near him, but being away, it was different. She cupped his face, "I know that things will get better, you know why?" Lorcan took a deep breathe, "Why's that?" She brought him down closer and placed a kiss on his lips, "Because, he's like his father in a lot of ways, and his father turned out to be an amazing man, husband and friend. I don't doubt even for a second he won't be that or even better." Lorcan then smiled at her, putting his arms around her waist. "You're right, he's our son after all, his mother doesn't fall behind with her kindness, charm, wit, sarcasm and her artistic abilities." She laughed and then pulled away, taking his hand, she led him out of his room. Lucy knew Lorcan would start crying if he stayed any longer, he could already feel it, he closed the door once they were out. They took a seat on the couch, she wrapped her arms around him and brought him closer to her, holding him. "Everything will be okay in the end, if it's not okay, it's not the end." He smiled and nodded, always with her quotes, Lorcan could see their family picture in the distance, he narrowed his eyes a bit and sighed softly. He would always need his son, but... would Nick always need him?
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