Hello, friend.

~!~ Check Guide ~!~ I am 18+. I don't know what I identify as either, use any gendered terms - am Queer/LGBT+. I have existed on this website for a while, just never had motivation to actively exist.

[thesecretravenblu]

Guide

Well, hello, friend. 🙂

I will try to remember to put trigger warnings at the beginning of posts, but if they are not there, try checking the #’s. Just proceed with caution.

This will pretty much be just a self guide if I actually stay consistent:

# vent - Posts about me venting and expressing my negative emotions.

# rant - Posts that are (about) ranting.

# depression - Posts surrounding depression. I’ll talk about symptoms, how its effected my life, and more general aspects of depression. I may even talk about depressive desires.

# anxiety - Posts surrounding anxiety. Much of what I will talk about surrounds social anxiety and smaller aspects of life I struggle with. I may go into some detail as to why I feel as though I have it and my symptoms.

# writing - Posts surrounding my personal writings or reblog writings.

# art - Posts surrounding my personal drawings or reblog art.

I may add onto this if I feel its needed. I don’t know if I can claim if something is abuse so please take this as your trigger warning. I will have strong language; sometimes the emotions we put behind swearing is the only way we know how to express ourselves. Will I make over-generalizations? Possibly. Will I talk about controversial concepts? Probably.

Personal info:

I am 18+. Plz no children.

I don’t know who I am, I struggle with individuality. Use any pronoun/gendered terms you wish. I do consider myself queer/lqbt+. You could consider me alt.

Admittedly, I am dumb and naïve. I do not have a good foundation of life.

I am yt, so while I am open to talking about race issues or topics, I do not have any lived experiences to base my opinions on (except witnessing racism). I do try to keep myself informed on topics and if I am wrong, tell me. Please do not allow yourself to feel burdened on my behalf, point me in the right direction and I will put effort into research.

Don’t have many friends or family I am comfortable with.

I am in therapy. It was suggested that if I struggled with in-person socialization, I at least keep myself open to online. I told them I would try so here I am. I am gonna try to be consistent (meaning not give up after the initial commitment).

Please call me out on my bs.

General Interests(?):

Details - I just really like details. I don’t know why, I just like seeing a lot of details. It may be associated with the amount of work and effort put into something, which then leads me to placing more value onto it. I don’t know. 

Horror/Blood/Gore - From creepypasta to slashers to real life.

Deity/Religion/Spirituality/Myth Talks - Open to religious talks, but I don’t want to argue who is right or wrong. I just want to learn.

Psychology and Mental Health - Maybe its because I am mentally ill myself, but there is something so beautiful(?) about the brain even when its at its worst.

Escapism - I have separated myself from the real world for at least a decade now.

Art and Writing - fan-work is valid and fun.

Aesthetics - Examples like Cutegore or Goth. I love seeing multiple forms of self expression. Just keep Poorcore/Poor Chic or anything like that out of here.

Animals - Real, fantasy. Fluffy, scaly, feathery, give me anything. Facts, development, relationships, pictures.

Anime - I haven’t watched many in a while but I am willing to try to develop an interest in anything. I used to be a pretty big fan of Ouran Highschool Host Club, Assassination Highschool, My Hero Academia, Black Butler, Hetalia: Axis Powers(?), and Death Note.

Video Games - I’ve played phone games like Twisted Wonderland, Obey Me, Mystsic Messenger. Also, I’ve played Pokémon, Minecraft, Sims (mainly 3 & 4, didn’t have it in the supposed glory days of 2), Smash Bros, Mario Kart, Kirby Dreamland (or something like that), Club Penguin (light of my life), Call of Duty, Doom (kinda),  and even Roblox. Don’t really have the money to by stuff and sometimes my interests have been more on the ability to create an interest in character design (personality, background, physical design, etc.) sooo.

Music - I’ll try out any genre. I like music made for fun, by fans, or act as internal expression. There is a slight preference for lullabies, video games, and queer-alt. They make it so easy to dissasociate.

YouTube (In no particular order and while I do not have a TikTok, creators overlap with one another.) - Technoblade Never Dies, Markiplier, Jackcepticeye, Twisted Minds, Nexpo, David Firth, Trixie Mattel, Rain Paris, Tori Phantom, Mothica, Michelle McDaniel, Melanie Martinez, Penguinz0, The Theorists with Mat Pat (watch all four/five channels, sometimes), Flamingo, SenyaiGrubs, JeGaysus, FootlessJo, MegaGoneFree, Chrissy Chlapecka, Derivakat, Annapantsu, Nick DiRamio, TheVolgun, CinnamonToastKen, abitfrank, The Speech Prof, Dead Meat (binge watch their videos), Cindy Chen Designs, Atozy, Brandon Rogers, Roanoke Gaming, B.Dylan Hollis, Zet0r, Jazmin Bean, Jammidodger, Genetically Modified Skeptic, U N D E R D O G S., Bob The Drag Queen, thequeenpriyanka, shiv_sewlal, Lovejoy, Viced Rhino, Primink.

[bi-goth-energy]

I’m so sick of AI fics, please at least tag it as gen AI so we all know and can filter that tag out or block you. Listen AI is unethical, it’s plagiarism, it’s a plague.

I don’t want to start naming names but I will if I see you post another AI fic. It’s not a real fic if it’s made using AI.

[eisenkrahe]

Last year JK Rowling personally funded a group called Sex Matters to amend UK law so that trans women *overnight* went from legally women to legally men. This has resulted in mass exclusion of the trans community from numerous organizations, along with ongoing violent assaults on both trans and cis women alike.

With the new Harry Potter series she will be making a reported $20 million per-season renewal + other performance dependent royalties. She has been open across multiple interviews regarding her intentions to use said funds to push forth even more trans targeted legislation in the years to come.

This isn’t a “she gets paid no matter what” situation. The more eyeballs on this show the more money she has to actively harm vulnerable communities. By engaging with it you are directly supporting this and otherwise making a conscious choice to consume HP over doing the literal very least possible to not destroy the lives of trans people across the world.

If my stating the objective facts above upsets you then feel free to unfriend and move along. Your nostalgia-goggles feelings for a tired, problematic franchise mean nothing to me compared to the welfare of my trans friends and loved ones."

If you care more about badly written children's books and imaginary wizards more than you do about real people in the real world do it far the fuck away from me.

Don't try to be in my life.

In fact, you are cordially invited to eat shit and die.

[thesecretravenblu]

I criticism I wrote for a writer, but I have so much anxiety about people being defensive that I feel like I cannot leave it in their comments. IDK if I wrote my concerns effectively, though, either. (TW: Failure to use appropriate tags/warnings, Mentions of Domestic Abuse and Sexual Assault):

I mean this with the best intentions: You may want to add to the Warning section: "Sexual Assault", because the "bedroom confrontation" is an example of domestic sexual assault and that was a jumpscare-and-a-half to read; or, at least a "Dub-con" tag/warning. Solomon also blaming MC for accidental indecency mixed with the confrontation makes the ending feel like a band-aid over a bullet wound with MC fawning to protect Sol's ego -- the relationship reads as so toxic. If you intended to make it read a little toxic, you were very successful (though, my tag/warning suggestions still stand).

[thesecretravenblu]

Excuse me a moment, but I will be venting into the void over the fact that hip-dips-with-a-short-square-body-type exist, and because of that, I think people with a smaller-waist-and-bigger-hip ratio don't count their blessings more.

Enjoy my minute-rendition in MS Paint (the goat) of what it feels like to have a short square body with hip dips (and its unfortunately not too far from reality), so some people really need to accept that they are attractive; and it feels like they are making up flaws about their bodies; and its so frustrating to see when some of us literally can't find clothing that looks good because the base is so shit that the only way to style it is by making the shape even less indistinguishable; and gaining nor losing weight or muscle creates the illusion of curse so here some of us are, looking like someone took a notch out of the side of a cereal box; and I don't blame people for being insecure, but I do try to avoid seeing people's criticism of their bodies when they have the most conventionally attractive features (I have literally never heard anyone actually treat hip-dips like they are actually a problem on small-waist-and-bigger-hipped people, idk, that's just me); and I cannot be convinced that a short square body type is attractive (people with longer torsos can actually use the illusion tips and that helps), I promise, I've tried; and its getting tiring pretending that all bodies are equally aesthetically appealing (and I really care for the "be happy your body is health" argument, it solves nothing, you can be ugly and healthy).

I just want to be aesthetically appealing and genetics couldn't even make me conventionally attractive in any way - not in body, not in face, not in height nor weight. I don't enjoy being a short, boxy blob that requires hair styling and makeup to hide features until I look cute in an alternative way. It sucks because muscles, fat, or slim don't make it look any better, and I am just stuck with it because no one can perform that kind of miracle.

The fact that indents in my hip area are the only curves in my body is so depressing -- I'm not asking to be beautiful or gorgeous or to emulate a model, just pretty.

[thesecretravenblu]

Bro, if I see another "this is my demon!reader, anyway, her name is Vicky" or some shit like this, I-

Do you know what "reader" implies? Oh, right, the reader fills in the name and physical characteristics. What is there to not understand?

And, I'm not saying you cannot give your "reader" characters nicknames or alternative identities or even static characteristics, that's fine and often makes sense to the story (if you disclose it early on with a purpose), BUT by adding characteristics and names in this way is ignoring the purpose of this character insert style. Just make an OC, people will still read it.

Going "Here is (y/n|reader), she has brown hair and eyes..." doesn't work unless its a disguise or something.

Going "Here is my AU in this fandom and it will feature a singlemom!reader. Her name is Lillian and her daughter's name is Elliana..." doesn't work because you've specifically created a name for the insert character when you are supposed to INSERT information as a READER.

[thesecretravenblu]

I love seeing YT interactions in the wild.

Person 1: Makes comment.

Person 2: Responds to comment about the flawed logic.

Person 1: "Its a glib." (It, in fact, was not.)

Person 2: "OK, mb. :P"

Person 1: "HOW DARE YOU? HOW ABOUT A SITUATION DIFFERENT FROM THE ORIGINAL WHERE I ALSO THINK MY LOGIC DOES WORK? NOW YOUR COMMENT IS 100% INVALIDATED."

Person 3: "WOW, Person 2. You have a silly post, that means all opinions you have are void."

Like, where did Person 3 even come from? Two people took offense in a situation that already was not that serious, and for what?

Also, I am starting to think "Its a glib" was never true with all the unnecessary defending going on - god damn.

Just to yap, but from what I have seen on the definition, a glib requires absurdity to work, no? If its a real position that a lot of people have, then it loses the humorous and sarcastic nature behind it and excludes itself from being a glib, yeah?

[thesecretravenblu]

I know in the hashtags of my last post I said part of my mental breakdown/self-hatred was currently being restarted because of art block, BUT-

I may start uploading stuff about my OCs: like art and my canon, Sims 4 cc generations, Picrew generations, aesthetics

And yes, I am aware that I am writing to an echoless void. I just want to write some thoughts out so I no longer have them filling my head.

Yes, I am very much alone. LOL

[thesecretravenblu]

lmao, I lied.

Not on purpose but still.

[thesecretravenblu]

Tired and unedited: I don't know how much of this is well developed thought right now, lol.

Bro, you guys know that calling out a mischaracterization is not hate right?

Like, if you are choosing to use a non-OC, why are you upset when you get called out for not fully representing or miswriting the character and their traits?

Sure, you are using a form of expression and there is nothing wrong with that, but you are able to use a character that fits the situation better (probably within that original media or, again, an OC) or who already has the traits you are either adding or removing.

It feels like the idea isn't fully developed and allows for misinterpretation. You can 100% manipulate a character to fit a new/different scenario without changing their core self - especially if the scenario is completely removed to the events of the media. (Like adapting a character into an AU: yandere, supernatural, or animal, etc.)

As writers, we will only get better when learning to write within different types of limitations. It provides the challenge we desire while still providing the space for our expression.

If someone mischaracterizes, misrepresents, or just has an underdeveloped view of a non-OC and gets corrected (by immediate lore, creator references, etc.), we shouldn't take it as an insult or hate. Sure, it may be upsetting (especially if you aren't expecting it), but we should use it as a tool of introspection; look where our writing skills are lacking and work on that; criticism, even if it feels like an insult, may have a reasonable source and automatically dismissing it as mindless hate will harm your own writing over time.

[thesecretravenblu]

Leaving a community..

I fear I have to leave an online commentary community I have been apart of for a while and it sucks.

At first, I thought the community was pretty open-minded and open, even after there was one incident where a mole brought up a lot of panic with anti-queer comments. Unfortunately, we were reviewing a rather controversial person who has identified as trans and people misgendered them.

I am of the belief that misgendering someone just because you don’t like them/they’re a bad person/they’re a criminal doesn’t mean you can be transphobic (ignoring someone’s identity) or practicing trans infantilization (as you may be implying that a trans person cannot be a bad person/criminal).

Add on top of that, there were a mix of comments that surrounded the “lack of masculinity” in Asian men implying that they were unmanly, beautiful people - a person straight out said that they prefer “a man’s man.”

I felt like I belonged there for a bit, but I don’t want to keep seeing bigotry. :(

[thesecretravenblu]

"My word is prefect, you can trust me," he says as he hides his first, less agreeable version.

[strangeracrossthestreet]

So, as you know, or don't, an employee got fired from Starbucks and they posted all the recipes online =)

part 1

[strangeracrossthestreet]

part 2/2

[bulletnunfunny]

reblog to fuck starbuck

[mechpilotvi]

Reblog the fuck

[thesecretravenblu]

Why not just make a new character?

I love fandoms and I love the work they can produce, but it has always left me confused when people would change so many traits that it no longer feels like the same character (sometimes it is just clearly someone stealing the popularity of the character to increase their own popularity). Connecting to a character and projecting some of your traits onto them is one thing, but reforming all the characteristics except the hair or an interest or some other small but general trait makes no sense to me.

For example, I know putting non-humans/non-human-looking-characters into Human AUs is popular and also allows for a lot of personal liberties. However, I've seen people just slap the name and relationships on completely knew characters with different personalities and designs.

For me, a good example of this is Mina from BNHA. I've seen artists draw her as a black girl with afro-styled hair. Mina doesn't present as typically human in the series so her design is up to your imagination in a (typical) Human AU. Plus, in BNHA, she has a mutation quirk, which we are shown can lead to discrimination in that world. For many people who are minority races within their own communities, they may see that correlation and build a bond with her character. Adding these traits don't take away from her character, they add without deleting other characteristics.

Unfortunately, I've seen this perspective be corrupted, for a lack of a better word. Instead of making a small adjustment to the original character or a completely new character that barrows traits from the original character, people just make a new character and slap the name on them.

Why not make a new OC and state that you were influenced/inspired? Why do some people feel the need to add traits that would realistically change the character fundamentally? If you want representation from a character, why slap it on an old character instead of making a fresh, organic character?

Like I love imagining, for instance, Cater from Twisted Wonderland just using queer slang. There is nothing funnier to me imaging him grimacing, scolding you gently but directly, and ending it by calling you girly-pop. It fits his characteristic of being chronically online as well as his canon laid-back-but-fun personality.

Honestly, I don't really have any bad examples in mind right now, but I do remember them popping-up here and there. As a whole, I definitely know the difference between a headcanon, canon, AU, and just a whole new character using a popular name/body.

Please, if you feel like you are missing representation, make a character with that in mind. That character you are projecting onto will never fully be able to give the needed representation the justice its deserves if the original character never had that trait in the first place.

Heck, pull a Spider-verse (or, well, Comic Books in general) and make a new AU where your whole new character is in place of the original character. Remember the main concept of that whole series: Miles Morales is NOT Peter Parker. Miles Morales is Spiderman.

[thesecretravenblu]

I saw this once it made it mine (to share, lol):

Small Trigger Warning: Mention of the word p3doph!l3 but not any description of the act/behaviors.

If you want to call someone a pedophile but you cannot use the word for what ever reason (demonetization, chronically online, etc. etc.), replace it with PDF File.

If used in context with other people who know the English word of pedophile and who has been exposed to internet culture, people will probably come to understand it.

[thesecretravenblu]

Just found out about Pauline Park, might make an informational post about her soon.

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

[thesecretravenblu]

The next Disney movie is gonna be hype with a new, somewhat familiar villain, guys.

[vincent-van-gtg]

[fitnessdesire]

Can’t risk it

[laderdesders1]

The duck of creativity. I waited so long for it.

[yes-another-obey-me-blog]

~Manifesting~

[rosietrace]

This duck of creativity gave me more ideas for my villainess fanfiction, and I am eternally grateful

[rddlrshrts]

Hello duck. Give me the goods.

[bleakqblake]

I NEED this

[cannedfruit00]

Need this desperately 

[thesecretravenblu]

Have you heard of Gertrude the Duck? She's a model.