the snicket file

we snickets take care of our own - secondary blog for @sugarbowlgen - ellie, she/her

[beatricebidelaire]

i mean lemonberry ice is THE ot3 but i’ve also been playing with various different sugar bowl gen ot3 combinations in my head, such as

kit/esme/ellington is very intriguing with all the tension and yet reluctant admiration for each other’s competence and the lengths one would go to to achieve a goal, the similarities and the differences, the coffee versus tea, the music debates, the wild driving

beatrice/kit/r is very lovely and cute and it’s very best friends to lovers with garden dates and fun adventures OR it’s very bffs and pining but they acted in a play where their roles were dating in the play so they had to practice kissing and sometimes they forgot it’s just practicing and then had to remind themselves …. the pining ……

beatrice/esme/kit would also be very fun and it’s very pre-heist shenanigans or vfd parties gone too wild or it’s very road trip across the continent and things just naturally developed from there

jacques/frank/bertrand gave me the first impression of something about their respective roles in vfd and how others viewed them and bonding over that and their loyalty etc except when i actually tried to write it well we all knew how that one turned out jerome vfdsponsor squalor truly out there being oblivious of the drama he unknowingly caused

lemony/bertrand/ernest also interesting in a way like now we could go deep and dive into the moral ambiguity and different introspection on vfd or it could be just fun flirtations at a masked ball too very flexible around here

kit/olivia/dewey working all together in some kind of information gathering scheme and some stuff just developed naturally unfortunately due to their work fields they rarely were at the same place at the same time so it’s just two of them meeting up at a time but they all had an understanding with each other

ellington/moxie/ornette could also be fun and they bonded sometime after atwq ended and i could picture some very domestic scenes for them like ornette decorating their home and moxie typing at dining table late at night and ellington making them all coffee in the morning also the ship name abbreviated to emo just saying

[thesnickettaxi]

daisy jones is a beatrice baudelaire variant. discuss

[dykemaclachlan]

pov you’re bertrand driving the taxi and you have a vital decision to make

[beatricebidelaire]

i’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday

featuring: Beatrice Baudelaire, Count Olaf

word count:  ~1.4k

alt: ao3

Looking back, despite however Olaf had felt at that time, pushing Beatrice off the balcony wasn’t really the end of innocence, or the end of anything. It was just another incident along the road that added another item to the long list of dramatic things Beatrice had done (like … working wings at a masked ball … really, Beatrice?) Things had long gone off track at that point anyway, the night at the masked ball never really “started” anything.

If he thought about the night too much and too philosophically, he would perhaps recognized the relief he had when he realized she hadn’t actually died. While he would be the first to say he never liked her and hated her even more after discovering what happened at the opera night and that she had always annoyed him to no end, he also couldn’t deny there really wasn’t anyone else who knew him as well as she did. And yes, he hated that, and would love to get some revenge on her, but the world would not ever be the same with her gone.

Childhood and teenage years had been messy and ever-changing, getting into VFD, going on all sorts of missions to different places from deep forests and fancy cities, and acting in so many different theater roles. The memories were overwhelming and all over the place when he thought back into his past, but she was the one constant, always there. Annoying, mean, petty, rude, dramatic. Realer and more constant than anything else that just kept changing.

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[snckt]

who resembles beatrice most?

violet

klaus

sunny

Voting ended onFeb 5, 2023

[deweysdenouement]

House of Cards

a/n: this has lived in my mind rent free for longer than i care to admit but i only actually wrote it all tonight. somethin’ a little different. somethin’ likely not that good.

or: years after beatrice and bertrand leave vfd, beatrice and frank get trapped under a desk together during a bank robbery. mostly just them, cameos from bertrand, violet, and ernest + much discussion of kit and dewey

TW for guns and blood (nothing graphic, no death)

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[kitsnicket]

I’m terrified of people who prefer baths to showers

[thesnickettaxi]

ok well i’m sorry that i don’t like to be blinded by hot water pounding into my eyes

[thesnickettaxi]

kit orders cocktails and jacques orders whiskey and then they swap because he loves his fruity little drinks

[thesnickettaxi]

my house of the dragon fic is driving me insane, like i have so many scenes written but i’ve spent multiple days trying to write a specific chapter ending that i need to finish in order to publish the next part!!!

[thesnickettaxi]

i’m curious do lots of asoue fans have bad/strained/estranged sibling relationships? or just familial relationships in general? this is market research x

[whoslaurapalmer]

e snicket saying “we snickets take care of our own” and sally sebald saying “siblings must take care of one another when they are all alone in the world” and beatrice telling violet “it will always be your responsibility to look after your younger siblings”

[thesnickettaxi]

rip kit snicket you would have loved rhaenyra targaryen

[thesnickettaxi]

still thinking about the sugar bowl gen secret history au that i never actually wrote

[kitsnicket]

Hey has anyone here read a series of unfortunate events I think you’d like it

[thesnickettaxi]

doesn’t sound like my kind of thing sorry

[beatricebidelaire]

kit and bertrand pining after other people together and getting drunk and somehow accidentally getting married and then the next morning they’re like ok we’re never going to tell anyone this we have reputations to protect, and everyone especially jacques would probably make fun of this for a long time, we’ll just take care of the paperwork quietly and divorce some time later it’s fine 

but then life got busy and then they forgot about it and the next time they remembered it was when kit was giving bertrand the ring to marry beatrice and after some heartfelt exchange and ‘take care of her’ suddenly one of them said

“hey i just remembered something”

“yeah???”

“i think we might still be married”

“oh fuck”

[thesnickettaxi]

hey guys it’s ellie remember when i was actually active on here?

[mylittleredgirl]

i was thinking this morning about how i categorize fanfic authors that i enjoy like AKC breeds and decided to share my rubric with you:

the specialist: this author has a favorite kink or trope and has written 80% of the content in that tag. you know exactly what you’re getting. they have A Brand™️. no matter what other traits they display, dedicated rare pair authors belong here.

the chocolate box: essentially the exact opposite. this author will try anything once. they have 80+ works in the fandom with no discernible pattern. the shortest one is 268 words and the longest is well over 100k. this breed of author may or may not be related to:

the renaissance fan: they’ve written three things in your fandom: your favorite fic, your notp, and a bizarre crossover with a show you’ve never heard of. you hit “expand fandoms list” on their author page and have to scroll down twice to reach the bottom. whenever you curse the fact that you can’t legally commission fic writers, this is the author you’re thinking about.

the horn dog: they’re here for one thing and one thing only. if someone’s dick is not in another character’s mouth within 500 words, they apologize for it in the author’s notes. they have one (1) g-rated fic.

the rookie: this writer is usually young, new to fandom, or just got a beta-reader for the first time. their fics are a little all over the place, quality-wise, but you’re excited whenever their name pops up because their unique voice gets stronger every time. you feel a personal investment in their development, like you’re an old man reading the local high school sports page and saying “this kid’s the one to watch.”

the live streamer: the most prolific author in the fandom. their works are all over the front page when you sort by kudos. you have no idea how they generate this much work, and have seriously wondered if they have access to an extra-dimensional time portal. their stories are usually un-beta’d and the characterization varies wildly, but their best works are inspired and you’ve read them 30 times.

the cryptid: this one comes out of nowhere every two years, drops the best fanfic you’ve ever read, and disappears. fifteen months after you left a three paragraph comment about how they changed your life, you get a message in your inbox that just says “thanks.”

the novelist: we talk about “filing off the serial numbers” when someone reworks their most popular story to pitch it as an original novel; this author somehow does the reverse. their fics are excellent, usually long-reaching multi-chapter AUs that have almost nothing to do with the on-screen characters except their names. i’d like to extend my personal thanks to this breed of author because it’s the closest i get to reading an actual book.

the reunion tour: this author wrote some of the most popular works in the fandom, but either moved on to k-pop or burned out when canon took a turn for the worse. they put out one new thing a year, often an old draft that’s been haunting them from under the floorboards. their last six author’s notes all say they never thought they’d write this pairing again and “this will probably be the last time.”

who did i miss?