what’s the mood for july?

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@thesporadicuser
what’s the mood for july?
the years have made me weird and strange to talk to. but still i must post
"what if things were different" is a poisoned well and drinking from it will kill you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The year is now half over
i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever
i will never get over the way time and the environment behaved so differently when i was a kid. a saturday afternoon felt so vast and long. i could get absorbed into the colours and atmosphere of a tv show. even the food was better. even the air
so it turns out that time actually does go by faster as you get older. just like how adults told me it would when i was younger. pisses me off
friendship breakups are lowkey the worst thing ever cause what do you mean this person I used to share every single detail of my life with is just gone
Sometimes it is your fault.. Sometimes you don’t listen well enough, you’re selfish, you’re rude and you aren’t always right. Sometimes you fucked it up and tbh that’s okay. It happens, learn from it, apologize and keep it moving. Just because you fucked up doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Don’t dwell on it
no but this is so important.. it’s so important to just accept you can fuck up you’re allowed to fuck up. you’re allowed to be wrong and it won’t be shameful, it won’t be the worst thing to happen. you’ll either let it go or learn from it and not let it happen again and that’s good.
i am nooooot locked the fuck in. im locked the fuck out. call the locksmith
i like to pretend i already died and asked god to send me back to earth so i can swim in lakes again and see mountains and get my heart broken and love my friends and cry so hard in the bathroom and go grocery shopping 1,000 more times. and that i promised i would never forget the miracle of being here
Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy Krouse Rosenthal
mwah is a very important word