bic sparklighter

mostly swtor bullshit

[thirtytwoseven]

Another lil chapter summary as I go.

Leia, Princess of Alderaan — Chapter 3

Captain Antilles suggests Leia has perhaps not thought her cunning rescue plan all the way through. Pff, she says, we can tell the Imperials we're taking a problem off their hands. All Leia has to do is convince an Imperial major. What a newb right? Should be easy.

Meet Lieutenant Ress Batten. She's a good shot and speeder driver who's totally too sassy for the officer corps and looks like '90s Daphne Rubin-Vega in my head. She accompanies Leia to the meeting at Antilles' behest. As they zoom thru the shitholescape of Wobani, Batten breaks protocol to kvetch about how the Empire is oppressing the planet. Leia's like yasss tell it.

Major Tedam (more like tedium amirite) is a sleepy-eyed bureaucrat who stubbornly insists he has no authority to allow citizen passengers to leave the planet -- anyone who does isn't even in the same sector, no exceptions kthxbye. Leia is shaking with indignant anger and sorrow and resolves to win this somehow. When she gets back to the Tantive IV she sees a little old lady knitting off in a corner and has an epiphany: they can hire refugees as crew to get around the restriction! Only a hundred, but it's a start. This loophole works like a charm and Maj. Tedium fumes impotently as the ship departs.

On the way back they're required to stop at an Imperial Buc-ees called Calderos Station… but it's been attacked and halfway destroyed, which means the Empire can't monitor local traffic anymore. (Leia goes out of her way to notice that there was likely little loss of life. Can the rebels not have little a moral greyness, as a treat?) Who could have pulled off this act of resistance? Could it be insurgents in some kind of… organization??? Stay tuned.

[thirtytwoseven]

Leia, Princess of Alderaan: Chapter 2

TWOISH YEARS LATER

Instead of studying for Model UN In Space, Leia is running thru the spaceport on her way to her very first diplomatic mission. 2V is still zooming after her playing droid-mom. Leia and her parents like to use the public central spaceport cuz they're monarchs of the people, don't you know.

Leia's assignment is to deliver supplies to starving refugees on Wobani, aka the desolate Rogue One planet that's a corny anagram of "Obi-wan". She is duly impressed by the Tantive IV but feels like Captain Antilles only thinks of her as short and cute (both of which she is). Well that's gonna change, thinks Leia, when I crush this relief mission.

On the way she organizes things in preparation. Easy as dunking a Mon Calamari ohoho.

Wobani is a thoroughly unremarkable temperate planet that's currently being aggressively colonized by the Empire via their "Commodities Enhancement Program". This is where they jack up all production quotas and then, hey presto, confiscate people's property and throw them in work camps for failing them. Shockingly, this has ruined Wobani's economy and now everyone not in Palpy's pocket is eating shoes for dinner. There are travel restrictions on Wobani people now and Leia is disgusted that nobody in the Senate will talk much about it although everyone knows (free Palestine btw). Not even her dad will, which really pisses her off.

This is where we find out she didn't tell Mom & Dad about this. She just took the car.

Leia is just brimming with do-good feelings as she makes ready to step off the ship. She fantasizes about her parents finally paying proper attention to her. Dai shokku as the doors open and the princess discovers the magic of grinding poverty and pollution, realizing all her prepared speeches are inappropriate.

There are stormtroopers keeping the rabble at bay, but when Leia says she's ready to distribute her goods, they withdraw and the Alderaanians get pretty fair bum rushed by the Wobanians. All until Leia spies the troopers' CO smirking a nasty little fascist smirk at it all. This causes her final fuck to crumble to ash. She jumps on a table, gets a "loudhailer module" from Antilles and yells EVERYBODY STFU AND LISTEN then gives directions.

This does actually work, earning her the captain's respect and the gratitude of the downtrodden. (Notably they use people instead of droids to actually pass out goods, cuz Leia is a monarch of the people.) Leia is frustrated at what a tiny drop in the bucket she now understands this mission to be.

Well that's gonna change, she thinks, when I load all these people onto my ship.

[thirtytwoseven]

Leia, Princess of Alderaan: Chapter 1

Teen Leia's all hype for her Day of Demand and storm clouds are gathering but her lady's-maid droid, WA-2V, is making her do her hair all fancy, which she hates. She gets dressed in an outfit a lot like the one at the end of ANH and thinks of the ceremony when she (as a baby) was formally adopted by Bail and Breha Organa.

Alderaan's palace, a monument to public service, is 1,000 years old and a labyrinth of chambers that gets periodically added to, every one of which Leia knows like the back of her hand. Ancient princesses had to fight their way to the throne room for the Day of Demand, but she only has to be on time for her ritual. She takes a shortcut cuz she's savvy like that.

At the throne room Leia greets the guards, how's ya family, say hi to ya motha for me. She muses how she knows nothing about babies and flashes back to Bail explaining that Alderaanian monarchy has the precious consent of its subjects, which must never be lost. Then she takes a sword (the "Rhindon Sword") off the wall, stances up, and... a curtain falls away to reveal 200 spectators to watch her do a kata and speech.

The sicc storm is going on outside and candledroids spookily light the carpeted hall as Bail and Breha and their guests look on. Leia notes her parents have invited Senators Pamlo, Malpe, Lenz, and Mothma, a more interplanetary crowd than is traditional. Mon is like :D and Leia hopes she doesn't seem too childish.

The ritual continues with Leia's parents challenging her. For her Body challenge she swears she will climb Appenza Peak. For her Mind challenge she'll be an aide for her dad and do some kind of Star Wars Model UN. For her Heart challenge she will call upon Mati go 'round the galaxy on her own dime, spreading love and charity and ... diplomatic missions. This sounds familiar! Anyway, when all 3 quests are finished she's ready to be the heir of Alderaan for true.

The ceremony goes off great, happy sweet 16 and all, but then B&B ignore her in favor of gladhanding the senators. Some Wilford Brimley-lookin dude named Sir Mellowyn is like d'aww you were great tho kiddo. Leia wonders why her parents are neglecting her lately.

Time for Leia to think about some expository stuff. Like how her parents are ordinarily excellent at the job, doting but fair, and she adores them. Breha handles all the Alderaan-based resource management and Leia sucks at this (at least the accounting part). Bail represents the planet in the Senate and, in the past, militarily. Leia is his right hand in the Senate and loves it. But lately he's taking a lot of closed-door meetings without her! And her mom only wants to throw fashionable soirées all night!

Later, back in Leia's snazzy bedroom, she's being dramatic in her nightgown and enjoying the storm from her balcony. She loves the wildness of storms and how this is her private pleasure. 2V's virgin alarm goes off and she makes Leia stop doing last dance with mary jane cosplay for safety reasons. Leia waits till the droid leaves and goes right back out. Maybe if she scales that alpine peak her parents will pay attention to her again!

[thirtytwoseven]

get ya hoods on it's time to read the leia book

[important-cat-pics]

[thirtytwoseven]

this is an "and" not a "but"

[thewindowofthesummerhouse]

Dora Abodi

[king-of-docks]

[thirtytwoseven]

this is my page where i just repost all the shit on the satele and marr tags what of it

[elliedearest]

That last fanart I reblogged about mother hen Marr is giving me this weird urge to write an AU Marr/Satele fic through Theron's point of view and his confusion of having Marr continously try to feed/water him in his threatening manner. Because this is Satele's son and he's recognizing the same bad habits his paramour has.

And Satele finds it incredibly amusing and sweet and will not save either of them.

[thirtytwoseven]

highkey putting something like this in my fic and would love to see someone else's take. more otp, give it me.

[obsob]

okeydokey artichokey :33333

[clayscollection]

Hasbro Star Wars Black Series reveals from the Fanstream!!!

The ARF trooper and ATRT is the SDCC exclusive set.

[thirtytwoseven]

tiiiiight it's my blorbina

[thirtytwoseven]

do not stare directly at the darth maura farm

[catchymemes]

[circus-sonata]

by Daido Moriyama / 森山大道

[70sgroovy]

donna summer performing in atlanta, georgia, 1978

[opens-up-4-nobody]

@chromium-siren Calico counsel :-]

[lancrewizzard]

I just remembered Neil Gaiman's narrative poem The White Road out of nowhere and felt chilled and sick all over again. It's a loose retelling of Bluebeard, except in Gaiman's version the man is innocent and the woman's accusations lead to him being killed.

And now we know what Gaiman did. I know it's stupid, but I can't help feeling like he admitted what he was with that poem and none of us knew. But now we know exactly what he is and I feel ill.

[theinternetarchive]

madonna photographed in new york city, 1979.