Weird

Hii. I'm 24/bi/female. I'm epileptic depressed and anxious. Watch out.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Want to start the new year out getting fucked really rough that way it is just a proper hello to the fucking I will recieve the rest of the year.

[d-voldo-deactivated20190607]

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Emptied

I am really missing.something being there inside me.

Like an empty coffee mug, I fall and shatter when disposed.

Begging not to expose me to the elements like sun and wind,

But give me over to the rain and thunder so I might fill again,

And feel the shaking of the ground beneath me as it quakes,

The thunder reigning everything as it flashes over everyone.

But I lay here empty, not drowning in the rain, not filled to the brim.

Emptied out before a desert where rain only comes one in a million.

[arlomilan]

Fuck all school staff who don’t let a kid leave before the fire drill for medical reasons.

For anyone with anxiety, epilepsy, or photosensitivity, the fire alarm isn’t good. Therefore, we have to leave before the fire drill.

Here’s why.

If not times correctly, a kid can have a seizure.

Due to the loud noise, a person with anxiety or autism will react negatively.

To avoid this, it’s required that these students must leave before the fire drill.

“But Trin” you might ask “what about actual emergencies”

Well, in an actual emergency, there’s a low chance that we’ll be returning to our school work. Also, we’re not fucking dumbasses. We know what a fire drill means but one can’t do anything while having a medical episode.

During a drill, we resume normal classwork. Except for those of us who had a medical emergency because of the drill. We can’t return to normal classwork. We either have to recover from a seizure or panic attack and that takes a long time. It’s not worth risking our education for a drill.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

I bit my lip

Earlier I bit my lip so now every time I eat, I keep biting the swollen part of my lip. It just keeps getting worse. Ugh.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Respect the dead

Some people have absolutely no respect for the dead even when that person is the deads own mother who abused them their entire life and you can't even stop after they died. So fucking shitty. Who do you even think you are?

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Today feels like one of those days where I am just lonely and invisible even though I am surrounded by all of my favorite people and I just want to run and run and run and never stop running.

[bitchycode]

if you see this, even if we never talk, PayPal me $600

[julykings]

hey if you’re a painter / writer / photographer / poet / artist of any kind you should reblog this because i want to follow you!! i want to start treating tumblr as a source of inspiration & art community because there are so many creative people on this site whose work i want to see! 

[thegoodvybe]

[neurodivergentlibra]

I love tumblr. Why? Because I can be horny or depressed in peace.

[fullmetalheadass]

and everyone else scroll by like “shit me too”

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

More than anything right now I want someone to understand that I am scared. Like fight or flight but stuck in that frozen in between place where you don't do anything but not breathe and shake. And for what amounts to no reason at all. I just wish I could talk to someone but I can't. I feel ashamed and empty and like there's a knife at my throat again. And I wish I could say this in words but no one talks like this.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

No one reads this shit anyways

Paranoia isn't just being scared of something unreasonable for a second. It grips me by the throat and suddenly I am fighting for my fucking life. Fighting because I don't want you to end it but I obsess over the fact that it might be me.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Why is everyone taking every word out of my mouth completely out of context lately? I say things trying to be nice these last few days and get bitched out over nothing or something I didn't even mean? I don't treat people like that and I don't expect to get treated this way either! Jfc!

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Empty

Where is the clear piece of reflecting plastic,

That sings beautiful symphonies to girls with eyeshadow on?

I swear I could reach right through myself,

Like a ghost in a house being refurbished after a hundred years.

I walk into walls and off of balconies and into empty minds;

I walk off ledges into tears, into words and sharp knives.

Every time I shower I watch pieces of myself fall down,

My arms, legs, eyes, lips, vocal chords.

I write because my voice crumbles, and my voice crumbles because,

The angels have all gone to hell,

And the seeds of me will follow after.

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

[thisistheweirderme-blog]

Un-me

I don't know what has happened. I don't know exactly what drained me right down the drain but I'm just left here as nothing. Staring into a phone all day, laying in bed unable to cry, and everything I used to be is all gone now. It's like waiting to die. Numb cold and unalive.