“AH! stop i could have dropped my croissant.”
“LET’S MCFREAKING LOSE IT.”
“and they were roommates!”
“oh my god they were roommates.”
“mothertrucker, dude. that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick.”
“i’m going to say it. i don’t care that you broke your elbow.”
“oh my god! I don’t give a fuck!”
“do you ever shut the fuck up?”
“roses are red, violets are blue. talk shit about me again and i’ll hit you with a shoe.”
“what the fuck is up ____? no what did you say?! what the fuck, dude? step the fuck up, ___!
“i have no soul. have a nice day!”
“i’ll kill you. i’ll kill you. not even worried about it.”
“shut the hell your mouth.”
“bitch i hope the FUCK YOU DO. YOU’LL BE A DEAD SON OF A BITCH I TELL YOU THAT.”
“Why do you have my phone?”
“‘CAUSE FUCK YOU THAT’S WHY.”
“those shoes look familiar.”
“how much money do you have?”
“i don’t have enough money for chicken nuggets!”
“saw you hanging out with ____.”
“____ it’s not what you think!”
“I WON’T HESITATE BITCH.”
“HEY WHERE DID YOU LEARN TO DRIVE?”
“I spilled lipstick in your Valentino Bag.”
“and two shots of vodka.”
“are those helium balloons?”
“Aw fuck, I can’t believe you’ve done this!”
“If you want to come over and fight, then fight me.”
“do you remember the time i liked you? no? good because it never happened!”
“I sneezed! I’m not allowed to sneeze now?”
“you’ll never have her/him/them.”
“would you like to dance with me?”
“why don’t anyone dance with me?”
“because i want to fuck you!”
“go back to sleep and starve.”
“i can see your bra strap.”
“alright i am smoking crack.”
“because i don’t want to.”
“that’s an off topic question.”
“THEY FUCKING PUSHED ME.”
“so i’m there, barbecue sauce on my titties…”