we only do it for the scars and stories

Desiree. 31. I'm really not fun. she/her/hers. I block minors and blogs with no age in the bio or pinned post.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Stranger Things Masterlists

All fics are fluff unless noted otherwise. Requests are closed.

Robin Buckley Eddie Munson Steve Harrington Nancy Wheeler Steddie

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Sitting here with my mother's family and wondering how it's even possible that I came from such hateful people. I don't even think they were like this before a decade ago, too. Listening to the way they talk about people and things they don't understand makes me so angry but also so fucking sad. I am genuinely so close to going no contact with my family. I feel fucking slimy sitting here knowing that I share genetics with such hateful fucking people.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Butt naked at 10:04 pm eating baby pickles out of the jar by the light of the refrigerator like god intended

[thruheavenandhighwater]

I'm not supposed to be sad anymore. It's been months I'm supposed to be over it now. But I'm not. I'm still so fucking sad and so fucking broken but nobody cares anymore so I can't say anything to anyone about it because it's my own fault that I'm still sad. I just want to be better. I want to be healed and happy and not fucking cry at work anymore.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

If Ashnikko ever saw the dude I used her music to get over she'd probably smack tf out of me

[thruheavenandhighwater]

I'm literally so close to getting back on tinder just long enough to find a hook up 😭 it's been months I'm dying over here but idk if it's a bad idea because I've never done it before uuuuhhggghhhhhhhhhhh

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Something that I was not prepared for when my life fell apart last year is how fucking difficult school is when you have 0 support system. I am quite literally the first person in my family to even attempt college. All of my friends did it 15 years ago or dropped out after a few semesters. I'm trying so hard but it's so hard. I hate school. I hate being alive. I hate my fucking life so much right now. I don't know what to do. I'm just so sad and I'm so broken and I've been trying to fix myself for four fucking months and I'm not getting better.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Here's the thing it's been MONTHS since I've been twisted up like a pretzel and I really think that would fix like 98% of my current problems but alas I am but a single spinster 😔

[thruheavenandhighwater]

It's been over 3 months and I'm still so fucking heartbroken. I still cry most days. I'm still so sad it makes me nauseous. I'm starting to think I might actually never get over this one. Either it's gonna kill me or I will but I genuinely do not see a future version of myself that is healed from this.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Y'all I just woke up from the horniest dream of my damn life so now I'm just laying here mad at my ex again because wtf am I supposed to do now 😭

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Okay so. I bought my house on December 10th and started moving on the 13th. I've been going back to my trailer everyday and cleaning and moving more stuff basically every single day since and I'm down to one room to clean and move before I go in a deep clean. I have my trailer until midnight on December 31st per my notice with the park. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy does my mother insist upon calling me every day to tell me that I need to get the trailer empty and clean so that I can sell it back to the park? Every. Fucking. Day. She already told me she can't buy it from me until January 1 because per my contract, I paid for December so I own it until January 1. My therapist told me last week that I have a lot of things going on all at once that are individually very stressful and I have all of them happening all at once. I've already upped my dosages for my meds for the next three months to help me combat all of this so why does my mother insist upon trying to pile more on top of it all? I am getting to the point that next time I don't know if I'll be able to stop myself from snapping at her and I don't want to do that but holy fucking Christ I can't take one more fucking phone call.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

I didn't even want to come out tonight and now I have to find a way home because she's going home with some dude. I am straight up not having a good time tonight. I'm sad.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Sitting at a bar I was forced to come to, watching my hot friend get flirted with and missing my ex real bad all of the sudden. God I hate this. I'm so sad.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

I just sobbed my way through typing this out to my ex. I know he won't see it because I know he's got me blocked, but it felt good to send. Like finally closing a book I've left open for too long. By the end of this month I will be done with this semester of school, I will be living in my new home, and I will be doing everything in my power to move forward as a kinder, stronger, more loving person. 2026 will be my year.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

It's officially been three weeks since my forever ended and I'm trying to sleep but I just can't stop thinking about like how am I ever supposed to trust another person? I feel like if I tried I'd always be waiting for something bad to happen. God I'm so tired and I'm so sad and I feel so empty all the time. I hate this. It isn't fair that I have to be the one to heal and I have to fix what I didn't break. It's not fucking fair.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

The feeling of crawling into fresh sheets after an everything shower when you're moisturized and smell like warm vanilla sugar? Top tier. Unbeatable.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Made up a honey jar to bring my ex back to me. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't and I try to move forward. But y'all this is fucking killing me. I've already dropped a pants size in 10 days. This is not healthy.