Fading to Dust
“ you can’t leave me, not like this. ” || accepting.
she feels like it’s a memory – like it’s happened before, time after time. it’s his body that falls, it’s her who should be dead.
her hands are wet with blood – it’s his blood, and there’s tears in her eyes because he’s gone, he’s already departed. shoulders tremble, eyes widen, and lips quiver. she doesn’t know what to do – not while her baby brother’s corspe lie in her arms, not while he’s left without a goodbye, without a single more kiss goodnight– no, he does not sleep, he does not rest ; he is dead. dead. dead. he is gone, never to breath again, never to speak again, never to see her again ( oh, gods, how it hurt ).
she cannot help it when the tears roll down her face, down her cheeks, drop onto his face. how she wishes she could have taken his place. he was far too young, a prodigy, while she, she was undeserving of her titles, her life – queen, princess, protector, sister. she’s failed all her siblings, failed him – and how she wishes she could do it over. part of her thinks, when she stuck her knife into her mother’s back, she would take her life too, but she knows she couldn’t, not if she knew she would meet leo, elise, marx, kamui. they were all so precious to her – and now it seemed like she was losing them all one by one.
how alone she felt – marx and elise, gone, because of kamui ( no – it was her fault, she didn’t protect them ). kamui, left to be with their blood family, because their bonds, their love hadn’t been enough. and now he, leon, her baby brother, all she had left, lay dead. she feels empty, cold. she’s lost everything she loves and holds dear – was this the gods’ punishment for her past wrongdoings? how she wishes the gods forgave her – though, it mattered not anymore. they were gone and dead. he, who she thrust the weight of a corrupted kingdom on, remains unbreathing. they’re all dead.
( she may as well be dead too. )
