it doesn’t get better, just weirder

A series of foolish and brazen attempts to figure out my life

[deathgasmic]

i will not lie, friends in my phone, i have been imagining affection from time to time

[deathgasmic]

[caats]

[transheadcrab]

why do they always show cranberries in thos big pits n its implied its wet and possibly swimmable. do cranberries really grow like that. wh

[khamingbird-blog]

You’ve never heard of The Bog?

[transheadcrab]

th

the what

[transheadcrab]

EACH ADDITION TO THIS POST MAKES MY BLOOD RUN COLD

[punkrorschach]

This is a cranberry bog (unflooded) it’s how cranberries grow. Once they’re ripe, the blog is flooded and the cranberries harvested.

Basically by using big floaty things to round them all up and then scooping them out of the water.

[transheadcrab]

thank u. i hate it a little less but the horrible little man in my head is still screaming “BOG BODY BOG BODY BOG BODY”, but i appreciate the education,

[bomberqueen17]

oh here is a fun lil perspective on cranberry harvesting i never heard about anywhere else. the guy who owns the restaurant right down the road from the farm, who fries our chickens sometimes, is from Boston, with the strongest Boston accent ever, and in a former life before he started slinging reasonably priced barbeque and occasional organic chicken, he was a cranberry farmer.

His farm was on the leading edge of kinda using organic/sustainable pest control methods, and one of the things that they did to keep insect damage down was that they encouraged wolf spiders to live in the cranberry field, to eat the bugs. 

This was all fine and good until they flooded the bog. Now, you don’t just like flood the bog and then go around it in a boat or whatever. No, you use hip waders to get in there and put the big floaty things where they go and get all the berries and such.

Well when you’re in the bog in hip waders, that makes you the tallest thing. Wolf spiders can swim a bit, but they don’t like it, so they’re, quite understandably, looking to climb out of the water onto a tall thing.

So yeah the first interview question he always asked potential cranberry bog harvester hires was “are you cool with spiders?”

“You’d be amazed,” he said to us, shaking his head a little, “how many guys would just straight lie. Like, you think I’m asking you that question to be cute? Nah man you’re gonna have like a hundred wolf spiders trying to climb your eyebrows, you gotta be chill, those wolf spiders are fellow employees. You really gotta be chill with spiders if you’re gonna work a cranberry harvest.”

[antiocheanism]

happy international workers day to the cranberry bog spiders

[indigobluerose]

I want any cranberry farmers reading this to know, really truly know, that “are you cool with spiders” is not a specific enough question for this situation.

[timetofigureitout]

I wish I could hurry up and get my shit together and just live a better life…I have so many things I want to do and I feel like I’m holding myself back because I can’t do any of the things I want to do if I just stay in this rut forever

[timetofigureitout]

I have like no friends in this town so my parents are the only people I really interact with and no shock here but my dad is once again driving me fucking crazy, like oh my god please just leave me ALONE I don’t want to go “do something” every day especially when I feel like shit and I’ve told you I don’t wanna do anything, I just want to be left alone, really what I want is for him to fucking leave so I can have my mom back, I just want to be able to spend time with her alone while I still can, I’m so sick of him being in the way and ruining the vibes of every little thing

[timetofigureitout]

Do I tell my boss and coworkers that I’m autistic and don’t understand social cues and rules unless they are explicitly laid out for me and risk being discriminated against or do I suffer in silence and inevitably get fired because I’m autistic and can’t read social cues or rules and therefore am not a “good fit” within the company culture

[timetofigureitout]

Fuck dude I’m so gonna get fired from this job fuck fuck fuck I love it here so much and I keep doing literally everything wrong and I keep bugging people and I just wanna fucking cry this is the worst why can’t I keep a job why don’t I get social cues why can’t I do anything right

[timetofigureitout]

my weird ass very distant cousin is ruining my chances of ever fully coming out to my family as non-binary/genderqueer because they’re being such a freak about it and like posting what turns them on sexually to Facebook and it’s like…buddy there is a time and place and it ain’t Facebook where your elderly relatives are gonna see that Yuri on Ice really makes you hot and bothered like please just be normal!!! fuck I have no hope, I’m not even a poster like that and I try to avoid cringe but they just don’t care at all and like fine cool congrats on living your “most authentic self” but also have a fucking social filter, you’re just out here openly sharing info that I would only disclose at a CIA black site after being tortured for weeks on end like fucking hell dude CHILL

[timetofigureitout]

I’m at such a weird point in figuring out I’m autistic and letting myself unmask and regress to a bizarre, almost childlike state where I not only need life skills, but I need fucking survival skills. Like now everything feels like a massive struggle and pain, and I can’t afford to do anything or go anywhere or even really save up for anything. I’m gonna have to start paying back my loans here really really soon and I’m worried about being able to handle those. I feel like I’m just gonna fuck it up. I don’t know how to live life in a capitalist hellscape where we only ever do things because they’re profitable and totally remove any human qualities of why we decide to live in societies. It’s safer to stick together just in evolutionary terms, because one of the first signs of a society is finding a skeleton with a healed bone break because it meant they were able to treat the wounded of the group, and would take time to help one another, not because it would benefit them in some way, but because of a genuine care for others? Some type of righteous, out of this world sense of an obligation to other living beings??

Idk I’m just having another weird night

[timetofigureitout]

We should nationalize the railroads like how has this not been done yet it would be the dopest thing if we had way more nationalization

[timetofigureitout]

me: *comes home after a full day of work, sleep deprived, and exhausted*

dad: “wanna go on a hike?”

me: “no I’m gonna take a nap”

dad: “uh, seriously?”

[timetofigureitout]

Funny how I used to LOVE SNL and a would watch them religiously and would watch my favorite clips over and over and now it’s just…not a part of my life in the slightest. It fell off so fucking hard and it was already pretty bad the last few years but now it’s just so so bad it’s unwatchable

[timetofigureitout]

I’ve been on a weight loss journey that’s been extremely healthy, by the books, doctor approved and one of the things I allow myself every once in a while is a goddamn burger because im human and I want a treat sometimes!! but my dad got all pissy at me and tried to guilt trip me for going to McDonald’s because I left a bag in the car and I just wanna say: fuck you, im going to eat my burger and continue losing weight in a healthy way that actually works for me because im not going to let your shitty mental genetics get to me, im not gonna let you shame me when I’ve lost 30 fucking pounds and gotten rid of my vitamin deficiencies and improved my cholesterol and improved my resting heart rate like fuck you fuck you fuck you I am doing what WORKS for me I’m not going to eat 100% healthy every single meal I’m going to practice moderation, listening to my fucking body, and eating what makes me feel good. And if every once in a while that’s a fucking burger then so be it, im so goddamn sick of him.

[timetofigureitout]

Lmaoooo just saw a job listing that requires you to PRINT OUT your resume and bring it to them in person…fuck completely off what are you 98 years old

[timetofigureitout]

I swear I’ll have a day off and my dad gets hypomanic and want to go out and go on a five hour hike and I can barely walk a few miles without getting exhausted and I’m already fucking tired from just being a person and interacting with others this week and he just doesn’t see how my PCOS is a fucking chronic illness and how it makes my life so fucking difficult he just doesn’t get it or understand it and he never will because he’s always “you can tell me everything” until it’s something even slightly uncomfortable to him, and then it’s “please don’t tell me I don’t want to hear about it” like fuck dude my life is ruined and this is going to be my life forever and you have the fucking nerve to ask me why I’m so tired all the time. MAYBE ITS THE FUCKING PCOS AND DEPRESSION AND PTSDA

[politijohn]

Source

Some good news!

[timetofigureitout]

How do I explain to people that yes, I’m gay, but I’m not gay enough to go to pride and I still just look like a straight person because I can’t buy clothes that make other people get the hint that I’m gay, I’m stuck with a very old wardrobe of like high school and early college clothing before I really became more comfortable with my sexuality and it just doesn’t fit in. plus I’m a fat bitch and I don’t want to go anywhere in public, I’m just too fat to go anywhere fun and this is not some fucking Ana post, I’m literally obese my BMI is like 52 I’m not fucking joking, I literally have developed agoraphobia because I don’t want people to know or see how fat I’ve gotten and I hate myself for it that I can’t even feel comfortable going to what should be a super fun event during a time that is increasingly deadly to queer people and where joy and celebration of our identities is so important to hold onto but…I just can’t. I just don’t wanna face the looks, the harassment, the stares…I just can’t take it. It gives me so much anxiety and fills me with an indescribable amount of self-hatred. I wish it wasn’t like this but I literally won’t feel comfortable going to pride or going out until I don’t look like this anymore. I just can’t look like this.