@timetoforgetthepasttt - Tumblr Blog

inevitable

No matter what I push every one away. I finally found a guy that is attractive and sweet to me. And here i go. Pushing him away, He wants nothing but to make me happy. Im too damn insecure though. I just cant keep anyone around. I really do not know why i am like this...

You know, I tell everyone that it gets better. Then my friend dies. and then I no longer believe that it gets better. A year later and I still feel just as fucking sad that he died. But maybe it does get easier to deal with. A year ago, All i did was swallow more pills to take away what i was feeling. I took anything in sight to join him. All i wanted was to be with him. I felt alone. And now, I can get through the day without the pills. Maybe not without crying but no pills is a step. A step to handling this a little better..i guess that is what time brings you.