Mutual friends does NOT equal mutual attraction.
I woke up the next day excited for my second date. I imagined that even if we had little to talk about, we'd still be able to relate to some things because we had mutual acquaintances...and he wasn't bad to look at.
I could not have been more wrong.
Date numero dos walks up and the first thing I notice is that he looks like a worse looking version of himself than in the photo. Not nearly as cute. I suck it up and put on a friendly smile, attempting to make small talk.
15 minutes in and I am thinking, how do I escape?
In my 11-12 years of dating, I've learned that the best way of telling someone off is to be as direct as possible. But in this case, I felt super awful about doing this in a very public space with lots of people around, so I used the I'm-actually-meeting-another-friend-after-this alibi. He totally was not buying it.
After I made my escape, I happily wandered around the area alone and did some shopping therapy.
Then, this happened:
Ohhhhhh man, the things I wanted to say. This to me was a mere confirmation that I had made the right decision to leave the date when I did. Instead of matching his text with volatility, I merely responded with "Sorry if you felt that way. I just wasn't into it. But thanks," and proceeded to block his number and remove him from my Tinder matches.Â
On another note, I didn't actually think my behavior was "shitty" as he so eloquently put it. I really tried to make an effort to ask and answer questions and feign interest for as long as I could. But other than the fact that he was not attractive, he was also uninteresting as a person.
Ok, maybe this is a little harsh. Maybe he has lots of interesting aspects about him that I will never know about. But when you're first meeting a person, first impressions mean a lot. I can usually get a sense for someone within the first 15 minutes of meeting them, and those first 15 minutes were real boring and not stimulating. It's very difficult for me to control my facial expressions when expectations don't meet reality. This is partly why I chose to keep my sunglasses on for the entire time of our very short-lived date. But perhaps it was more my body language...? Whatever it was, I was not into him in any way, shape or form and I couldn't hide my disappointment.