took like twice the edible i usually do so well see how this goes
it’s goin gfuck i am so high
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@tipsystar
took like twice the edible i usually do so well see how this goes
it’s goin gfuck i am so high
took like twice the edible i usually do so well see how this goes
I love this one
Considering you and your sex life, is there something you are so PROUD OF you would brag about it on reddit? (Or tumblr lol, Stole this from reddit)
djflaskdf oh goshhh, im !!! the worst at coming up with things on the spot like that!! but!! gosh i dooooo believe i came on and bragged a lil about having a threesome so ... haha as of right now!!! that! <3
also sorrrrry this took so long- was daydreaming about ordering food i cant justify buying and sobered up!! TT.TT so now im on crunch time to get back drunk again hahaah <3 cheeeers <3
omg fuck BOOOBSSSS
immm inebriated. just fyiiii
new shot lefz goooo
youre making me wanna drink whats left in my stashhhh
you SHOULDDD if you drink more i will >33333
wanna suck on nipples soooo fuckin bad
i can help using my secret boob technique
woag secret tequnique
so srevrettt…. dropll
i am. extremelt inebriated: im gonnaa drrinm another shor
fat people i lov eyou and i wanna kiss you all
wanna suck on nipples soooo fuckin bad
wanna play wirh a drunk persons tits while weee both hiccupimg and burpinf uncontrollably
going out drinking and coming home to your roommate who has definitely only had a few beers. you’re stumbling in the door, blinking blearily and trying not to focus on how bad your friend was slurring and you see your roommate, shirt off and gut out, table covered in empty beer cans, letting out a huge belch before they even realiE youre there
ive been on a bender for days and im drinking vorka shots and yhis is probably the last day i can drinm for a whole because i have to go on a trip in a few days and ill have to deal with withdrawals for those days. but rihht now im drunkkk and thats awesome
I’m lounging on my couch drinking wine right from the bottle in a white bathrobe while doing stuff on my puter
I feel like a super fucking sexy rich lady with questionable sobriety from a movie rn this is so cool
Just had to swap out my wine bottle for a different one because the aftertaste got yucky, feeling like a wealthy baroness perusing my many wines rn
I should be baroness-drinking-wine-core more often I feel so elegant
Ohhh shittt thevbuzz is hitting and making me feel evcen more fancy im tge coolest puppy ever rn .
Feelinng my head gettging heavy, leaning head vack afainst the arm of the couch adn drinking more yuhmmy wineee
I’m the bvooze baronness, a prestighious puppty
Hiccupphhng n listening to clsassical music whjile gluping more weine likea sexsy batesoness im sockol
Ordred food n was sluerring abitt on tge phjone uhOhh!
Im tfe cvoolest fsncciest sexsiesrt boize bsroness evcer I thijnk tghis winesso yuummjyy
I took a wine nap andi wowke up with drool allovser my pilloew I am turulyy the best bareonness
having a low sex drive Nd a fetish is so interesting becauss i’m drunk enough rn that i see boobs and get horny and its like. is this how normal people feel. like bodies don’t interest me at all normally but rn i see a hint of nipple and am drooling
Morning routine
BEEP BEEP BEEP. I turned off my alarm clock. It said 6.00 a.m. I felt groggy and nausiated, and had no idea why it rang so early. I noticed I had a message on my phone.
"Good morning Sweatie! I hope you slept well and feel great today! Make Mommy proud and take three large swigs from the Absolute you put next to your bed. You know I just want you to feel good! After you had your refreshment, I want you to write me and tell me how much my big boy drank, and then I want you to get back to sleep again. Okay Sweetie? Xxxooxxx"
I couldn't remember putting a bottle next to my bed. Truth be told, I couldn't remember getting to bed at all. But I checked, and of course Mommy was right. There was a bottle of Vodka with 2/3rds left. Mechanically I picked it up and screw of the lid with clumsy finger. Three swigs. It didn't even burn a lot on the first. But I felt a fimilar warmth in my crouch. I wanted so bad to make Mommy proud. On the third swig, I tried to drink as much as possible, but my stomach upproared and I had to stop. I lay there, helplessly gulping air and tried not to throw up, like a fish on dry land. Finally I was able to write.
"Go mornin momy. I tried to drink you prou og me but almost got sick. Sory"
After that, I must have passed out.
BEEP BEEP BEEP. My alarm again. I dropped my phone and fumbled before managing to turn the sound off. My vision swam and I felt desorientated. 7.00 a.m. I had a message on my phone.
"Oh hello there little one! You began drinking at six already? Your such a little rascal. thirsty today? Are you still in bed, and do you have more supplies next to you? If so, I want you to have three large swigs. You know I just want you to feel good! Write afterwards, and take a little nap. Love, Mommy xxxooxxx"
It was something with the message that gave me a bit paus, but I couldn't understand what it was. Had I been drinking? But she was right, it was a bottle on my night stand. Less than half of it's content was left. I reached for it and almost tripped it over. Damn, I wasn't steady. I tried again and secured the bottle. Fuck it felt SO GOOD everywhere. My body was a warm numb blob. I felt so horny, and wanted to be the best pup for Mommy. With one hand jerking my little cock, I drank. I wasn't hard, but the little worm was warm and touching myself was more than a habit, it was just what I did. The liqour went down so easy. I was utterly surprised when the bottle was suddenly empty. I was unsure how much it had been in there, but I had probably drunk quite a lot. My belly began hurting and it felt like it was on fire. I collapsed on my side, suddenly covered in sweat. I didn't know how long I was lying there gasping before I felt steady enough to write on my phone:
"I hadd there st off drink haha i love y me cocl is so small bhu bfeel good almist puke ilo veyo"
I blacked out.
BEEP BEEP BEEP. It took me a long time to come to, and even longer to turn off the bloody alarm. I had no idea what was going on, and whan I tried to sit up, my head lolled and it the world twisted and turned around me. I crashed back into the sweaty damp bed. I had a message on my phone. It took me quite some time to read it.
"Haha, oh Sweetie! Dead drunk seven in the morning! So, let me get this straight. Drunk as you were yesterday, you still managed to bring a bottle to bed. I know you opened it and drank from it before sleeping at 2 a.m. Now it is five hours later, and you have finished it? You must feel SO GOOD now, you might as well get up and get your day started! I want you to go to the bathroom and do your morning toilet, and while you do, I want you to delete this conversation without reading back anything. You know I don't mind it when you binge, but I don't want there to be a paper trail of my support. Can you do that for Mommy? I call you in 15 minutes so I can see your beet read face, your growing body and your little wee wee, and set you off for the day! Xxxooxxx"
I felt my dicklet get warm again. I loved it when Mommy saw me in a drunken state. I fumbled with my phone to delete the conversation. When I finally suceeded I tried to get out of the bed, but crashed violently into the nightstand and fell into the wall with my head first, and slid down on the floor. Drool dropped down on the floor from my slack jaw. I felt complete. This would be a fantastic day.
kinda wanna start the day drinking 👉👈
had to do some cleaning but its 5pm and im getting started :3
helll yessssssss im drunk tooooo