tofu

[theblasianbarbie]

im sick of having crushes its time for the tables to turn and ppl to have crushes on me!!!!!

[gothicprep]

honeymoon is an interesting term because an actual moon made of honey would imply space bees which is pretty horrifying

[racingmiku-deactivated20180707]

I have a bath bomb from lush but no tub so I guess I’ll just have to eat it

[daddysgydgirl]

“Yes. Daddy.”

[daddysgydgirl]

Being a good girl is the best.

[daddysgydgirl]

[officialunitedstates]

FACT OF THE DAY:  most turkeys look exactly like a human hand

[itzbatz-deactivated20240722]

SCARY MOVIES SET IN HOUSES ARE THE WORST

I LIVE IN A HOUSE

[tiredprincessx]

🖤🔪

[chrissyisabear-deactivated20190]

am i the only one who is self conscious about my windshield wiper speed when it’s raining. like i gotta watch other cars to make sure im not being too dramatic

[cashewcream-deactivated20170602]

me about me: is she okay

[holepic]

i may be ugly but at least i have an ugly personality too. consistency is key.

me @ anything ever: it’s like that one episode of spongebob

[cummingcourtesy]

I want to explore old abandoned homes with creaky floors and broken windows with you.

[fuckingsellout-deactivated20170]

u all gonna die

[weedpoop]

if your girlfriend is cold, be a gentleman. put her in the oven for 40 minutes on 350. check often and serve plain or with white gravy

[wikihovv]

if u take the time to shave ur eyebrows off just to draw them back on at least make them somethin cool. a dolphin or baby dragon.

[magicalboye]