Certified GirlThingFailure

20yo It/Its some sort of Thing (girl style) and Raging Lesbo | I will unapologetically (reblog) hornypost(s) on main you have been warned. Don't expect many original posts, I mainly just reblog

[tittylovingfoxgirl]

finally making a proper pinned post i guess so uhh...

im a trans girlthing, huge lesbian, freak, all that fun stuff. also plural and still sorta figuring it out. theres just two of us (we think, probably) but we only figured it out like basically at the start of the year so still unsure on a lot of things. anyway weve got:

Valerie: it/its, fox, super subby, incredibly pathetic in a cute way

Winter: she/her (for now?), moth, switch (i think)... uh... idk, we werent even aware i existed until recently 👍

might come pretty this up a little more another time maybe. asks and dms are always open, we wont bite unless you ask nicely... probably :3

vvv common tags we use below the cut vvv

#i poast - all the original posts from us

#the foxgirlthing's pics - pics of us (warning: boobies)

#tummy tuesday - basically the same as the above tag

#[valerie/winter] posting - havent actually used these yet but plan to start doing so to differentiate whose writing the post

[tittylovingfoxgirl]

guess we need to update this cause there now a ✨️third girl✨️ but can't be bothered to rn

[sloppystyle]

[moveslikekeithrichards]

any time i copy paste a message to send to 2 different chats i feel like such a fake ass bitch but im choosing to look at it as the digital equivalent of standing in a doorway hollering so people in both rooms can hear me

[girlballs]

it's the decade of the tgirl thighjob

[knucklecurve]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

keep thinking about how I wrote in my dissertation about how every time a new form of public/social space emerges it's immediately popular with kids and teenagers who see it as a chance at freedom and then adults colonise it and kick them out. this happened with malls in the 80s and diners in the 50s and pool halls in the 20s. my dad was doing research on this trend in like 1975. and I was like "yeah so this is going to happen to the internet" and then five years later every government suddenly decided to ban kids from everywhere online. I hate being right especially when I don't even get paid for it

[myvagina]

“vagina”

—

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[foldingfittedsheets]

at some point in your life you will be bringing sugar and butter to boil for toffee and you will think “it hasn’t thickened enough.” that is the devil talking. the toffee needs to cool before it can set. this is how you end up with toffee that will annihilate your mouth. learn from this folly.

[27dragons]

apparently the devil spends a lot of time in kitchens

[futchlings]

couch lines

[futchlings]

🫵 footfag

[lesbiskammerat]

fine..if you insist

[pubup-is-a-kitty]

newbie mech pilot: um,, why is my callsign Rapebait?

girl who picked it: shut up Rapebait

[unicornthots]

a patient top that tells you nope, legs open baby so so gently every time u try to close them, patient & firm no matter how much u beg

[lostswaan]

want her to overstimulate me till i shake pathetically under her..

[thememedaddy]

[ndnbutch]

this is kind of exactly why these tests are bullshit lol. they’re not accurate, they’re based on loosely aggregated data and fundamentally DNA cannot really tell us much about things like ethnicity and CULTURE

when my aunt got one done it said we’re Indonesian rather than Chinese. But like. my family has cultural ties to China we can trace back centuries. that’s what I grew up with. We have understood ourselves as Chinese for generations upon generations. I don’t really know much about Indonesian culture outside of what I’ve learned from friends. On a personal level, I have no connection to it at all. Is it possible my family has some degree of genetic connection to Indonesia? Sure, I guess? It simply doesn’t matter though. It would be absurd for me to call myself Indonesian and stop identifying with my Chinese culture just because of the results of one of these tests.

Which, btw, also applies to identifying as Native off the back of these results! That’s not how that works, folks!

For what it’s worth, my aunt’s results caused no turmoil in my family. Everything else was more or less what we expected, and all of us agreed the inaccuracies were silly and would not impact our lives at all

[lalatongzhi]

If i may add on to this, dna tests present a very racist view of how nations actually work. Like dna tests work under the assumption that each nation is all full of the same, im not sure what term to use here, ethnicity maybe? It ignores how a lot of countries tend to integrate many different ethnicities. Like there are multiple ethnicities in china that arent han chinese people. Are they less chinese then? There are ethnic han chinese people who lived in Malaysia going back generations, are they any less Malaysian? Dna test can only at best twll you who you share dna with, it as ndnbutch said, cannot tell you what your culture and heritage is.

[findmeinthealps]

guy on a work call just accidentally said “have a nice freak-end” instead of weekend and now i desperately want that to be the new meme. have a nice freakend everybody

[tamamita]

hope it was worth the college money

[tamamita]

[exiguous-angel]

update: the reason it hasn’t gotten any sort of relief is cuz iran fuckin smoked a logistical center that was supposed to resupply them and the military covered it up lmaoooo

[exiguous-angel]

incredible tweet it found, literally this one

[captain-price-returns]

Calling the tactical nuke in MW4.

Interesting look into the evolution of how the American zeitgeist views war, from the Obama era MW2 nuke killing everyone including you to Trumpenyahu era epicsauce based aura bomb

[captain-price-returns]

remember when COD had a nuke kill 30,000 US troops, and you had your "oorah, fuck yeah!" US Marine character slowly and horribly dying of radiation poisoning