RIGHTEOUS GEMSTONES ANALYSIS: Kelvin X Keefe
Season 1, ep. 8 and 9, Kelvin's Drunkenness and Keefe's Banishment, including also, The Aftermath.
Part One, Keefe:
I believe Kelvin and Keefe have VERY different interpretations of the conversation that took place.
The audience (we) see it from the perspective of the gemstones. Kelvin says they're 'not being true to themselves' and we, having just seen the shit the gemstones are going through, see that as, yah, of course, the gemstones are not being true to themselves, but Kelvin's audience, in the reality of their situation, is Keefe.
Keefe doesn't know about the Gemstone drama. He doesn't know. He doesn't know about the prostitute or the drugs or the blackmail or the firing or the anything. He doesn't know .
So, Keefe, being in love with or having a crush on Kelvin, at this point, naturally, in line with and confused by the Christian rule, thinks Kelvin is talking about them.
About him.
He can't be true to himself because he's queer (something demonized or, in the least, thought to be demonized in their religion, the religion hes trying to be a part of) and he's celibate, right alongside Kelvin. And beyond that, what is thought to be 'true' of himself, what is left (at this moment in Keefe's development) is satanism. So, being true to himself, that's not an option. But Kelvin is now saying that not being true to oneself is bad? So, lost and confused, thinking that Kelvin is talking about them, him, he says, (paraphrasing, from memory) 'dont you think God's being a little harsh?' with a heartbroken expression on his face. and, Kelvin, absorbed with his own drama and thoughts bulldozes right through it. He cements that thought of confusion and heartbreak by asserting that not being true to oneself is horrible and Keefe, not knowing anything about what's going on, turns it back to himself in the form of,
How can I be enough? How can I possibly be true to myself while adhering to the constraints that have been put upon me by my own desire to be better? To move from my past?
And it's even more heartbreaking for him, because he idolizes Kelvin.
So, it's also in the form of,
How can I be enough for him? What can I do to be enough for him?
And then, Kelvin banishes him. It shatters his hope that he can fix this, that he can part his way through the sea of confusion and reach the man on the other side in the form he'd be most willing to be proud of.
And, now, with no Christianity, nothing, he's still trying to make sense of what Kelvin said, and all he has, is yes, his queer identitiy, but also, Satanism and BDSM.
Only, he is still confused and hopeless and yearning and hurting. Going back to being 'the baby' didn't help him be 'true to himself'. It only made him more lost and confused. He doesn't like it, not anymore. It's not right.
Whenever Kelvin shows up to save him, the pieces of his spirit slot together, he knows where he belongs. His confusion is lessened. His most truest self, most authentic state, is right by Kelvin's side.
For the rest of the seasons, we do not see his past Goth buddies or Satanist friends. His most truest self is no longer with them (if it ever was, dude's got some trauma), he's discovered his purpose and more parts of his identity, in the presence of the 'handsome man' by his side.
Please leave any questions you have in the notes and I will answer them! Thank you.