TOECAR NEWS

Your UNOFFICIAL source of Toe-nenent standings, race recaps, and exclusive in-front-of-the-scenes content. Boogidy Boogidy!

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We are SO back. TOECAR season 5 is upon us!

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We'll y'all that race was a wild one. Most injured driver tonight had to be Fred Wurst. No updates on his condition so far. Still, this season of the splint cup is on a streak of non-lethality.

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My 6th connection got delayed so now instead of 5 more layovers I have 7 and a bike ride

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That was a wild race. Good to see the curse of Pierre still going strong. I won't be able to cover tomorrow's race live. My flight to Miami has about 12 layovers and I won't make it in time.

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LIL CORNSTALK ARRESTED

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DEATHS TODAY:

Dad Gum

33 spectators

Burnie Talldown (firefighter)

4 spectators on the infield

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SPUD WINS AT TRENTON

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Scubs with an impressive block

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Youngstroker da Body Snatcher and Lil Corn Stalk hit the wall. Stroker stopped under bleachers. Lil corn stalk drives straight through the RV park. 4 attendees dead. Rip Burnie talldown, whose fire truck was hit in the accident.

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Lil corn stalk and young stroker off track bad. MORE attendees dead.

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Joe Swanson spins no caution

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DAD GUM GOT ABDUCTED LIKE WALTER PRESSURE NO SURVIVAL POSSIBLE AT LEAST 200 ATTENDEES INJURED THE CATCHFENCE DID NOT DO ITS JOB

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Wreck on caution, Elly almost dies

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CURSE OF WALTER PRESSURE

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Dad gum has a tummy ache

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Lap 34 Corey Origami sideways, Cam Aero flips on top of Spindiana Bones

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Crash 2 recap:

Eleven Paxaday, Kobe Keith, and Ashiago Asiago slam the wall and flip, Mike Candy and the #2 involved afterwards