El Mas Chingon @tofuboots - Tumblr Blog

no one will see this

I’m depressed and revisited this blog (damn, it’s been here for 14 years!). I have old messages with people consoling me because of break ups with women who told me they’d come to miss cis men. I guess some shit doesn’t change.

I also have messages from anonymous crushes. Maybe multiples? Maybe just one? But it’s a small reminder that there’s someone for everyone. Hope, I guess.

It’s also nice to come back here and see how far I’ve come in my transition. But it’s incredibly lonely these days. Tumblr was a place to be out when I wasn’t so out IRL. Now I’m just approaching 40 and stealth.

Anyway, I’ve come pretty far. And I suppose I should keep that in mind when I’m feeling this bad.

Until next time, I guess.

xxplosivefotos805

I come back to these very rarely. I don’t like keeping physical journals. But sometimes you just need to get things off your chest.

I don’t know how to convince someone of my love. I’m sorry if I wasn’t good at that. It seems to be a common theme. The ironic part is I think I gave it my all.