for a second, clementine felt the fresh onslaught of fear and panic rush through her as her eyes traversed across his features that were painted in shock, half-gaping at her. it made her only imagine the incredible number of things he wouldâve said, perhaps, half of them rambling nervously. heck, he only barely digested the fact she thought he was cute weeks ago. her thumbs wrestling each other in her lap, the anticipation gnawed at her from the outside. despite her want to let him know just what she felt, there was no quenching the self-consciousness that it came with admitting something so meaningful in such a vulnerable time. watching him, a nervous laugh billowed past her lips. â I know, I did the same wh-mmf! â her voice was muffled by the sudden contact of his lips against hers. her eyes widening, there was still the impeccable softness and warmth to his lips that she had gone so long without, it made her realize just how shes MISSED this between them. her thoughts flooded blisffully, her eyes fall closed and her hand rises up to gently find itself on his cheek as she savours the heartfelt kiss that conveys his answer more than any verbal word could supply, and her heart flies.Â
         though, once he parts and holds his mouth instantly with sharp discomfort and pain written on his face, a apologetic expression breaches her features as she recoiled and released a breath from the sparks that still linger on her lips from the kiss. â shitâlou, are you okay? I- â before she can finish, his hands are frantically picking up his writing utensils and scribbling. a wide, amused smile lighting up her features at the huge lettering that perfectly describes both his reassurance that she wasnt the cause of the obvious discomfort that seized his mouth occasionally, but his enthusiasm over her confession, a laughter full of softness falls from her lips at the little doodle of hearts he madeâthe first one shes been able to do utter since everything had happened. maybeâŠmaybe this was it. the moment they could begin to mend themselves together.
      â I think youâre doing pretty good so far with your words, â she mused, sparkling ambers meeting his mocha ones, before a hint of regret entered them. â I do wish I could do something about the pain, honestly. you could never be a coward, Louis, especially now. â it was the inner strength she had always knew he had within him, one he doubted. in spite of what he thought about himself, all the insecurities that were bustling inside him that made him assume otherwise, all that he endured that wouldâve made anyone want to quit, to her, louis was one of the strongest people she knew. â but since youâre tired, you wanna sleep for a bit? I can stay with you if you want.. â she added, hopefulness lifting her tone and features.Â
Louis wished so badly that he wouldâve been able to urge himself to
reciprocate the words presented to him. To tell Clementine just how
much he truly adored her. Cared about her. Loved her. Even in aÂ
written form, he found himself too scared to manage it. Sheâd already
said it. There was no way she was saying it just to appease him,
but was still afraid. Instead, he hoped his actions would convey that
message louder than any words could.
Before Clementine could say anymore, he leaned forward again to
pull her into a warm embrace. He would rest his cheek against her
shoulder, arms wrapped around her strong shoulders and keeping
her close.Â
He loved her. He loved her more than heâd ever loved anythingÂ
before. At this point? She was his everything. Sure, he would always
have the friends heâd made at Ericsonâs. They were his family when
the family he knew left him at the school. Now, though? Clementine
and AJ both were new parts of his life that he hope never faded. He
would protect those two with his dying breath.
The suggestion of sleeping came up from the young woman, and
Louis couldnât help but nod. He genuinely was exhausted, considering
how often the pain, nightmares, and self-hatred would keep him awake.
Gently, he would pull away from the embrace and pressed another
brief kiss to his girlfriendâs lips, a tired smile gracing his features. He
picked up his pad of paper again, writing out his answer fully for her
to understand.
Please stay. I want to sleep, but I donât want you to go yet. I donât
wanna keep you from your important leader duties, though.
Part of him hoped that sleeping beside her would help keep the
night terrors as bay. It was probably childish, to hope for that to
be a reality, but it was true. Waking up crying again was the last
thing he wanted to do beside his girlfriend.Â