C'est pas la peine

INTJ. East Coast. ΣΨΖ #69 innibrë. I have always belonged to me.

[toriiimon]

A: So you want a clone. So you can stay home and be the best looking hermit.

[lapdanseuse]

diet tips for women

when devouring the flesh of a man who has wronged you, eat as much as you can. you need food to grow and you can never be too big or too strong

[toothpastelove]

[yesdarlingido]

When you feel like you’re not getting anywhere in a conflict with someone you love, the best way to bypass that verbal roadblock is to take an internal path instead of the cognitive one. You can shift the conversation not by going deeper into the details, but deeper into the feelings attached to the details. Like this–“when [blank] happened, I felt [blank].” This shift is important because it changes the goal from being more right, to being more understood. When you move out of content and into feeling, your brain shifts from protecting against a threat, and into a mode that bids for connection.

L, thoughts of a therapist (via yesdarlingido)

[youmustcreate-deactivated201508]

[toriiimon]

10 year high school reunion in 6 months

Some of my former peers created like 3 brand new human beings in the time I did half a master's degree, quit, tried a couple compsci classes, quit, got a data analytics certificate and half heartedly job searching. I'm trying really hard to pretend to be jealous but I'm glad I'm a late bloomer once again.

[luthienne]

…I preferred books to the world of reality, and something of that has remained with me—a slight taste for eternity.

Simone de Beauvoir, from The Mandarins (via mercurieux)

[thenordroom]

Airstream trailer turned into cozy home

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[toriiimon]

Fall 2016 — Dolly Sods, Spruce Knobs, Rock Hill Orchard, DC

Recently I said my world is smaller these days. I haven’t been to NYC in a year; I didn’t travel internationally nor plan to in the last few months of this year. I rarely go out at night anymore but it’s been a mostly pleasant surprise to exercise self discipline in saying no to others while listening to that inner voice. I always thought an inner voice was only for the free spirits, the ones who didn’t have to plan furiously to make up for every moment they failed to be productive. But no, my inner voice tells me to be outdoors, be it hiking or backpacking, to make up for the lack of surfing opportunities on the East Coast.

It also finally voiced that I couldn’t keep going without planning for my future financially. It’s incredible but I managed to live decades without considering the possibility I could end up with a partner making less than me. Or that if I wanted to actually be truly independent, I’d have to change my spending habits substantially. So I’ve been working on my finances in the last five or so months and it’s a slow but steady process. I thought I would miss out on so much if I didn’t go to every concert or celebrate every opportunity with my friends or buy accessible luxury items or eat at the newest restaurants.

But really, I’m not missing anything aside from a good story that others rarely find entertaining. Instead, I have so much more these days, more time, more money with stronger relationships. I read a few months back that if you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will. And it’s a painful truism that still irritates me to think about; it’s something I’ve been avoiding reflecting on because it’s a sore spot. But once you start, I can’t imagine going back to letting others choose my life for me. A recent dinner with people who didn’t respect my decision to not to drink left me angry at them and myself afterwards. I decided to weed her out permanently. I’d rather be alone than to be pressured by others who either can’t or won’t recognize values that they didn’t choose.

I have a lot of privilege that I have not always been grateful for or even cognizant of but life has been mostly good to me this past year. And when it hasn’t, well, it’s been character building according to my dad.

[natalyalobanova]

[twisteddoodles]

THE GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF

[grouchesandgallantry]

Visit Original Link

[theatlantic]

“In America, it is traditional to destroy the black body—it is heritage.”

A Letter to My Son

On the one-year anniversary of the release of Ta-Nehisi Coates’ second book, “Between the World and Me,” here’s an excerpt that is more timely and pertinent than ever:

There is nothing extreme in this statement. Americans deify democracy in a way that allows for a dim awareness that they have, from time to time, stood in defiance of their God. This defiance is not to be much dwelled upon. Democracy is a forgiving God and America’s heresies—torture, theft, enslavement—are specimens of sin, so common among individuals and nations that none can declare themselves immune. In fact, Americans, in a real sense, have never betrayed their God. When Abraham Lincoln declared, in 1863, that the battle of Gettysburg must ensure “that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth,” he was not merely being aspirational. At the onset of the Civil War, the United States of America had one of the highest rates of suffrage in the world. The question is not whether Lincoln truly meant “government of the people” but what our country has, throughout its history, taken the political term people to actually mean. In 1863 it did not mean your mother or your grandmother, and it did not mean you and me. As for now, it must be said that the elevation of the belief in being white was not achieved through wine tastings and ice-cream socials, but rather through the pillaging of life, liberty, labor, and land.

Read more here.

[zephyrandtide]

[thesnicketfile]

Lemony Snicket's Advice on Writing a Nice Thank-You Note

1. Do not start with the thank you.

2. Start with any other sentence. If you first say, “Thank you for the nice sweater,” you can’t imagine what to write next. Say, “It was so wonderful to come home from school to find this nice sweater. Thank you for thinking of me on Arbor Day.”

3. Then you’re done.

I recommend learning how to write a very good thank-you note. A child who can write a nice thank-you note can turn into a cocaine dealer five years later and be remembered as the child who wrote nice thank-you notes.

[limitlessplaylist]

Visit Original Link

The sand stuck in my bed And the memories in my head And love I’ve been tryna let this whole thing go

[elisabethhewer]

In one timeline we kiss but the stars don’t come down. In another you set a world on fire for me but I perish in the flames. Another and we’re strangers on a busy street, brushing by close enough to send each other reeling off balance but not stopping. Somewhere there’s a final space where your hand on my face is the punchy climax to an epic saga, where the way our mouths meet takes the breath right out of people’s throats. One universe has us right, of all the millions stacked on millions. So it’s not this one. I can live with that. The world is full of wonders and a hundred years ago the moon was too much to dream of touching. Look how far we’ve come. Turn over your shoulder and just look. Maybe we’ll come across each other at the turning of the century, racing across the breaches between worlds. I’ll build my life on that maybe.

elisabeth hewer (via bluebeards)