Astronaut Extraordinaire

This is a Crack!PR blog for TOS Alan Tracy. Well, just his ego, nothing else would fit. >.>

[tos-johntracy]

I love your dry sense of humor John... especially at Alan. So my questions: Have l you pranked Alan recently? Do you like pulling any harmless pranks on him when it’s his shift on TB5? Have you ever thought about persuading Scott and the others to prank Alan and have him stuck in Five longer than needed?

Alan’s very existence has been one long, cruel prank played on all of us.

[tos-alantracy]

At least Dad remembers my name. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

tos-alantracy‌:

honeybee-hayes‌:

rocketboytracy‌:

“Um.. Okay.  I don’t think that’ll be that hard.” Alan peeks around Bee at the strange man. “If he’s supposed to be me, how did he end up like that?” 

                          « ♥ »  —— Bee casts a glance over her shoulder, brow furrowing as he asks. “Honestly, Alan? I don’t even want to know. But if he wants a fight, I’m ready for one.” 

Ready for a fight may be a slight understatement, if the square of her shoulders and the clench of her fists is anything to go by.

“You want to know how I became so awesome! I’d be more than happy to let you in on my secret. It might help you a bit. You see, the first thing is to smoke. Lady’s love a man with a cigarette. Second, make sure they know you have money. Nothing costs too much. Also don’t forget to show her who’s boss, or you might end up with someone like that.” He shoves his chin at Bee. “Once they’re like that, there’s no hope for them.” 

                          « ♥ »  —— “SOMEONE. LIKE. THAT? NO HOPE? YOU CHEEKY BLIGHTER!” If there’s one thing to tip Bee over the edge, it’s that,and she’s storming towards him to grab at his shirt and pull him close. “Now you listen here-!” 

There’s no stopping her now.

[sonatanotwo]

OR IS THERE?

He doesn’t know what on earth is going on, but seeing Bee this angry isn’t normal and he caught the tail end of what was said by the guy enough to know he’s definitely trouble. Coming up behind Bee, Virgil folds his arms and clears his voice.

“Would you like me to take it from here, Bee?” he offers, calmly. Not that he doesn’t think she could handle herself, but on the other hand she looks ready to cause some real damage. He switches his gaze to the guy, eyes narrowing, hoping some simple intimidation will help drive him off.

[tos-alantracy]

“What? Now you going to sic your boyfriend on me? What’s he going to do, play me a sonata and paint me to death?” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

TOS Alan (you asked for it): Snuggle Time!!

Send in “Snuggle time!” To snuggle with my muse

{ Oh my god what did I do }

                          « ♥ »  —— For one long moment, Beatrix is suitably horrified at the prospect of having to snuggle with this blond ——— she stops right there, dreading to think of precisely how many names she could call him. That train of thought occupies her a little too much and makes her blind to the arms that wrap around her waist and pull her down onto the sofa next to him. 

“HEY! LET ME GO!” She wriggles and fights and contemplates biting him at the very least, but eventually settles down when she realises his grip isn’t loosening any. Grumbling, she crosses her arms and tries to wriggle a few inches of space between them so they’re not quite so close.

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

tos-alantracy‌:

“Now see, this isn’t too bad is it?” He puffed some more smoke, not really paying attention what direction it went in. “Only thing to make this better would be some wine and soothing music.” 

                          « ♥ »  —— “It could be much better than wine and soothing music. For example, you could be your brother instead and I’d be much happier.” Which brother, she doesn’t bother specifying. Any of them are better at this rate. “That or I could go home. What are you going to do if your girlfriend walks in?” 

[tos-alantracy]

Alan shrugs. “Hey, I’m not the one that wanted the cuddles.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

TOS Alan (you asked for it): Snuggle Time!!

Send in “Snuggle time!” To snuggle with my muse

{ Oh my god what did I do }

                          « ♥ »  —— For one long moment, Beatrix is suitably horrified at the prospect of having to snuggle with this blond ——— she stops right there, dreading to think of precisely how many names she could call him. That train of thought occupies her a little too much and makes her blind to the arms that wrap around her waist and pull her down onto the sofa next to him. 

“HEY! LET ME GO!” She wriggles and fights and contemplates biting him at the very least, but eventually settles down when she realises his grip isn’t loosening any. Grumbling, she crosses her arms and tries to wriggle a few inches of space between them so they’re not quite so close.

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

tos-alantracy‌:

Alan tightened his grip a little before putting one of the cigarettes in his mouth. “You’re loss. These are pretty good ones.” Then he pulled out a lighter and lit the cigarette. He took a puff and blew out the smoke, but it drifted right into Bee’s face. 

                          « ♥ »  —— Beatrix says nothing as he tightens his grip, unfortunately bringing her closer. “No cigarette is good, they’re all bad for your health.” She says it like she doesn’t smoke herself, albeit rarely. When the smoke wafts into her face, she merely wrinkles her nose and tries to dispel the horrible cloud by waving her hand. “Blow it the other way.”

[tos-alantracy]

“Now see, this isn’t too bad is it?” He puffed some more smoke, not really paying attention what direction it went in. “Only thing to make this better would be some wine and soothing music.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

TOS Alan (you asked for it): Snuggle Time!!

Send in “Snuggle time!” To snuggle with my muse

{ Oh my god what did I do }

                          « ♥ »  —— For one long moment, Beatrix is suitably horrified at the prospect of having to snuggle with this blond ——— she stops right there, dreading to think of precisely how many names she could call him. That train of thought occupies her a little too much and makes her blind to the arms that wrap around her waist and pull her down onto the sofa next to him. 

“HEY! LET ME GO!” She wriggles and fights and contemplates biting him at the very least, but eventually settles down when she realises his grip isn’t loosening any. Grumbling, she crosses her arms and tries to wriggle a few inches of space between them so they’re not quite so close.

[tos-alantracy]

“Hey, you offered snuggles to anyone so just relax and enjoy it.” Alan pulled out a cigarette holder and flips it open. “Want one?” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

                          « ♥ »  —— “I forgot to account for the fact that you exist.” Nonetheless, she settles back a little bit more. She was a woman of her word, after all. “No, thank you. I hate smoking.”

[tos-alantracy]

Alan tightened his grip a little before putting one of the cigarettes in his mouth. “You’re loss. These are pretty good ones.” Then he pulled out a lighter and lit the cigarette. He took a puff and blew out the smoke, but it drifted right into Bee’s face. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

rocketboytracy‌:

honeybee-hayes‌:

tos-alantracy‌:

Oh! I see how it is! You like them young, don’t you. And I’m just not young enough. Well, good thing that personality of yours makes you quite ugly then. I don’t know why I even bothered with you in the first place. 

                          « ♥ »  —— Bee’s expression flicks through a variety of things - surprise, embarrassment, indignance - before she settles on pure, unbridled anger. It twitches her eyebrows and curls the corner of her mouth. And to think this guy was so smarmy about it too. One moment, two, then she huffs and turns her back on him. There was no way her argument was getting into this guy’s thick skull. 

“Alan, I’m begging you, do not turn into this guy when you grow up.” 

“Um.. Okay.  I don’t think that’ll be that hard.” Alan peeks around Bee at the strange man. “If he’s supposed to be me, how did he end up like that?” 

                          « ♥ »  —— Bee casts a glance over her shoulder, brow furrowing as he asks. “Honestly, Alan? I don’t even want to know. But if he wants a fight, I’m ready for one.” 

Ready for a fight may be a slight understatement, if the square of her shoulders and the clench of her fists is anything to go by.

[tos-alantracy]

“You want to know how I became so awesome! I’d be more than happy to let you in on my secret. It might help you a bit. You see, the first thing is to smoke. Lady’s love a man with a cigarette. Second, make sure they know you have money. Nothing costs too much. Also don’t forget to show her who’s boss, or you might end up with someone like that.” He shoves his chin at Bee. “Once they’re like that, there’s no hope for them.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

TOS Alan (you asked for it): Snuggle Time!!

Send in “Snuggle time!” To snuggle with my muse

{ Oh my god what did I do }

                          « ♥ »  —— For one long moment, Beatrix is suitably horrified at the prospect of having to snuggle with this blond ——— she stops right there, dreading to think of precisely how many names she could call him. That train of thought occupies her a little too much and makes her blind to the arms that wrap around her waist and pull her down onto the sofa next to him. 

“HEY! LET ME GO!” She wriggles and fights and contemplates biting him at the very least, but eventually settles down when she realises his grip isn’t loosening any. Grumbling, she crosses her arms and tries to wriggle a few inches of space between them so they’re not quite so close.

[tos-alantracy]

“Hey, you offered snuggles to anyone so just relax and enjoy it.” Alan pulled out a cigarette holder and flips it open. “Want one?” 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

rocketboytracy‌:

honeybee-hayes‌:

tos-alantracy‌:

Hey hey, no need to get so defensive. I forgot how difficult you could be. 

                          « ♥ »  —— Beatrix crosses her arms, one finger tapping impatiently against her bicep. She doesn’t like being called difficult, but she’s heard worse. “That’s exactly the reason I placed myself between you two. To make it difficult for you. Perhaps you’ll find me so difficult that you’ll turn and leave.”

“You’re not going to hurt him are you? I mean, I know he’s a bit crazy, but I don’t think beating up a guest is a good idea.” 

                          « ♥ »  —— “I’ll hurt him if it’s warranted and he knows that.” Despite saying that, Beatrix eases her hostile stance. Perhaps punching Alan’s alternate self in front of him isn’t the best idea.

[tos-alantracy]

Oh! I see how it is! You like them young, don’t you. And I’m just not young enough. Well, good thing that personality of yours makes you quite ugly then. I don’t know why I even bothered with you in the first place. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

tos-alantracy‌:

honeybee-hayes‌:

rocketboytracy‌:

Alan couldn’t help the crack in his voice. “You know this guy!?” 

                          « ♥ »  —— “Unfortunately,” Beatrix mutters, looking over her shoulder to the Alan she was very familiar and comfortable with. “He didn’t hurt you, right?” 

Nah, I was just explaining to him how to be more like me. I still can’t believe this squirt is me. He’s just a little dork. 

                          « ♥ »  —— “The last thing our Allie needs is to be more like you. You’re a cheater and you’re arrogant. Squirt or not, dork or not, he’s a bigger man than you’ll ever be.” 

[tos-alantracy]

Hey hey, no need to get so defensive. I forgot how difficult you could be. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[honeybee-hayes-deactivated20251]

rocketboytracy‌:

honeybee-hayes‌:

tos-alantracy‌:

Hey, babe. You ready for that second date? 

                          « ♥ »  —— “First of all, don’t call me babe, save that for your poor girlfriend. Second of all, not a chance in hell!”

Alan couldn’t help the crack in his voice. “You know this guy!?” 

                          « ♥ »  —— “Unfortunately,” Beatrix mutters, looking over her shoulder to the Alan she was very familiar and comfortable with. “He didn’t hurt you, right?” 

[tos-alantracy]

Nah, I was just explaining to him how to be more like me. I still can’t believe this squirt is me. He’s just a little dork. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[tos-alantracy]

honeybee-hayes‌:

rocketboytracy‌:

tos-alantracy‌:

Nah, Brains will figure something out. Tintin’s my girl! She can be a bit hard to please sometimes, but she always comes back to me, I’m a real catch ya know. I have all kinds of girls wanting to go on dates with me. Racing and girls, those are the two most important things in life! 

Umm… I think your priorities are a little off… SCOTT!! VIRGIL!!! There’s this weird guy who says he’s me but he’s not and yeah, I’m gonna go now. 

                          « ♥ »  —— Beatrix knows a familiar voice when she hears one - and this time she hears not one, but two. And one of them, she still absolutely despised. Thats why, out of nowhere, she appears to pull the younger Alan - her Alan - protectively behind her back. 

“You.” Her eyes narrow dangerously, “You leave our Allie alone. How on earth did you get back here? Were two black eyes not enough for you last time?” 

Hey, babe. You ready for that second date? 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[tos-alantracy]

Hey, you Alan Tracy? Aren’t you a bit young to be piloting Thunderbird 3? 

[rocketboytracy]

Yeah, I’m Alan, who are you? And how do you know about Thunderbird 3? 

[tos-alantracy]

I’m you. Though a much better looking version if you ask me. Alan Tracy, pilot of Thunderbird 3 at your service. So, how many car races have you won? I bet not as many as I have. I’m the best on the planet. 

[rocketboytracy]

Uhh, none? I barely know how to drive. Unless you count video games. How, exactly did you get here? 

[tos-alantracy]

Well, that’s boring. You should go out and race sometime, it’s a heck of a rush! And I don’t know. Must of ran into some kind of anomaly in my bird. So, is your Tintin as pretty as mine? 

[rocketboytracy]

Aren’t you kinda worried about that? I mean, don’t you want to get home? And what exactly is a Tintin? 

[tos-alantracy]

Nah, Brains will figure something out. Tintin’s my girl! She can be a bit hard to please sometimes, but she always comes back to me, I’m a real catch ya know. I have all kinds of girls wanting to go on dates with me. Racing and girls, those are the two most important things in life! 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[tos-alantracy]

Hey, you Alan Tracy? Aren’t you a bit young to be piloting Thunderbird 3? 

[rocketboytracy]

Yeah, I’m Alan, who are you? And how do you know about Thunderbird 3? 

[tos-alantracy]

I’m you. Though a much better looking version if you ask me. Alan Tracy, pilot of Thunderbird 3 at your service. So, how many car races have you won? I bet not as many as I have. I’m the best on the planet. 

[rocketboytracy]

Uhh, none? I barely know how to drive. Unless you count video games. How, exactly did you get here? 

[tos-alantracy]

Well, that’s boring. You should go out and race sometime, it’s a heck of a rush! And I don’t know. Must of ran into some kind of anomaly in my bird. So, is your Tintin as pretty as mine? 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[tos-alantracy]

Hey, you Alan Tracy? Aren’t you a bit young to be piloting Thunderbird 3? 

[rocketboytracy]

Yeah, I’m Alan, who are you? And how do you know about Thunderbird 3? 

[tos-alantracy]

I’m you. Though a much better looking version if you ask me. Alan Tracy, pilot of Thunderbird 3 at your service. So, how many car races have you won? I bet not as many as I have. I’m the best on the planet. 

[rocketboytracy]

you know, your counterpart.... a different version of you from a different dimension...

“Last I read the idea of a multiverse was still only theoretical. No one’s proven or even disproven that it does or doesn’t exist.” Alan cracks a smile. “It would be interesting to meet my counterpart, but I’ve yet to have that chance. The odds of it happening are quite low.” 

[tos-alantracy]

Hey, you Alan Tracy? Aren’t you a bit young to be piloting Thunderbird 3? 

[tos-johntracy]

covfefe

[tos-alantracy]

That looks nothing like me! 

[tos-johntracy]

if you think YOU have daddy issues, my father named me after a contraceptive

[gordoncoopertracy]

but your name isn’t Alan?

[colonel-jeff-tracy]

Alan is the only type that worked

[tos-alantracy]

Yeah, it’s called perfection. No point in trying again after they had me.